Bright, Shiny Futures - Chapter Seventeen

Lee's heart pounded as he dialed her number. He shouldn't be afraid to talk to her - they were good, weren't they? And she wanted him to be a part of Zach's life - if she hadn't, she wouldn't have allowed them to meet, nor would she have primed their son with stories about his birth father.

"Hello?"

Thank goodness it was Kara who answered. He couldn't quite explain why but the thought of talking to Michael about custody arrangements for Zach filled him with disquiet.

"Hi Kara."

He heard the smile in her voice. "Hey Lee. What's up?"

"I need to talk to you."

"So talk."

He chuffed softly to himself. Some things about her definitely hadn't changed. "I ... I ... uh" He couldn't bring himself to do it. "I was wondering if we could talk in person."

Silence.

"Do you want to come over?" she asked eventually.

"I was hoping we could talk privately," he said softly, not that there was anyone around to eavesdrop, but somehow it just seemed appropriate that he be secretive. He sensed her hesitation.

"Well I do have to come to the city. I could drop in at the hotel."

"That would be great."

"i could visit your dad then too," she added, warmth flooding her voice.

"You'll love that," Lee said, smiling into the phone. "He's got a surprise I'm sure he's dying to share with you."

"What is it?"

"It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you now would it Kara?" he reproached. "You're just going to have to wait."

"Bastard," she said softly, obviously grinning.

"Isn't that 'magnificent bastard' to you?" he challenged playfully, hoping she'd remember.

She did.

"Just 'cause you were magnificent that one time doesn't mean you always are Apollo."

He laughed out loud. "Guess I'm going to have to try harder to impress you then."

She laughed as well. After a moment the line went quiet.

"I've missed you Lee," she whispered, barely loud enough to be heard but the words reverberated through his soul, taking him back to that moment in the Dance when the fight had finally gone out of them and only the love was left.

"I've missed you too," he said, as before, meaning it just as truly.

"I can mange to be downtown tomorrow afternoon. Will you be around?"

"I'm always around."

"Yeah well, I thought you were looking for a job."

"I've hit a bit of a roadblock there," he said, voice strained.

"Oh?"

"We'll talk tomorrow."

"Okay. Take care Lee."

"You too." He swallowed. "Give the family a hug from me."

"I will."

The line was quiet for several minutes, silence thick with things unsaid.

"Goodbye," he said finally.

" 'Bye."

He sat and stared at the phone for a long while after hanging up. He hoped it wasn't going to be a mistake asking her to come here. Only if you can't keep control of yourself, his subconscious whispered. I can, he thought. I have to. Or I'm going to lose her forever.

XXXXX

The knock startled Sam out of his reverie. He rose slowly, stretched, and walked the few feet to the door. The hotel rooms weren't exactly large, but compared to the tiny quarters he and Tory had shared on Galactica, they seemed incredibly spacious.

He blinked several times, at a loss for words. The person opposite him stared at him for a full thirty seconds before speaking.

"Aren't you glad to see me Sam?"

The words were like a smack, pulling him back to reality.

"Tory." He lunged forward and pulled her into his arms. She wasn't a small woman by any means but in Sam's arms she looked downright petite. They stood in the doorway, eyes closed, holding on as if for dear life.

For the first time since learning the truth about himself he felt real again. She was there, warm in his arms, and it brought with it the realization that it didn't matter if they were different. A man was more than the sum of his parts, as was a machine. It was like finding out you'd been colour blind all your life and suddenly being able to see properly - it was something you'd never known or missed till you discovered it. Finding out changed your world but it didn't end it. It just made it that much richer as you continued forth.

No matter what else he didn't have, he had Tory. And he was lucky his wife shared the same fate. At least she'd understand his questions and frustrations.

"I'm so glad you're okay. I missed you," he said softly, as they walked into the room.

"I missed you too," she said, smiling back at him. Her dark eyes were deep and sad though, filled with fear.

They sat on the bed, side by side.

"Did you talk to Helo?" he asked carefully, knowing they needed to talk about it.

"Yeah," she replied distantly. "He told me some things ... "

His eyes found hers in the mirror. "Me too. Things about us," he added quietly.

"Disturbing things."

Sam nodded.

"I'm not sure I believe it. It just seems so crazy."

"And scary?" he offered.

She turned her head towards him. "Very scary." She swallowed heavily, breathing becoming shallow. "Do you really believe we're Cylons Sammy?"

He shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant. "The evidence would seem to say so."

She shook her head, eyes filling with tears. "I can't believe it. I don't want to believe it."

He reached a hand out and touched her cheek delicately. "Then don't. Let's just forget what we were told and keep going with our lives as before."

"How can we?" she asked tearfully. "This changes everything."

He shook his head vehemently. "No it doesn't! We've been Cylons all our lives and never knew it - it didn't affect how we lived. We're human in every way that counts - we live, we love, we hate, we cry ... there's nothing different about us."

"We're different inside."

He laid a hand over her heart. "It's only what's in here that matters."

She laid a hand on top os his and laced their fingers together. "I'm not sure I can do it," she said tearfully. "I'll always know ... Is it possible for us to keep it a secret for the rest of our lives? I'm not sure I can."

"You can. I know you can. You're strong Tory - don't let fear get the better of you. I'm here," he added fiercely. "You can count on me to be there." He squeezed her hand.

She leaned into him, crying quietly against his chest. He held her and stroked her hair, feeling the weight of it in his fingers. Eventually the tears stopped and she pulled back to look up at him.

Sam wiped away the wetness with his thumbs then leaned down and kissed her. Her lips were hard, tense, but under his gentle invitation they softened and she began to return his kisses. Her hand stole around his neck to twine in the curly hairs at the nape.

Eventually they stopped to breathe, foreheads resting against one another's.

"I love you Sam," she whispered.

"Love you too," he answered, then he gathered her into his arms and took her further up onto the bed. They spent the next few hours making love, Sam all too aware that it was more of a comfort measure than something ignited by passion. His heart literally stopped for a moment or two when he sat up and saw their reflection in the mirror opposite the bed. Tory's spine was glowing red - pulsating in time with her heartbeat as she worked above him. In all the years they'd been married he'd never noticed that before.

Despite his brave assertion that being a Cylon didn't matter at all, he knew there would be some things he would have difficulty accustoming himself to. He knew he had no choice but to be stoic - Tory was strong but she was close to breaking point, and he had the feeling he was going to have to be strong enough for the both of them.

XXXXX

She sat by the pool, dropping pebbles into the still water and watching the ripples. They started off small but grew wider and wider till their touch extended to the bank on the other side. She wondered idly, head cocked to one side, if that's how life worked. One small event that appeared to have little consequence but ended up reaching so far and wide that it affected everything.

"You are wise, child."

The voice came suddenly behind her but surprisingly didn't startle her. Surprising, because the figure cast no shadow into the pool.

Hera turned to face the woman behind her. "Who are you?"

"The Oracle."

"You don't look like her."

The woman laughed, rich and deep. "Child, I have many faces. You are in a different place now so I appear different than I was before. But I assure you, we are one and the same."

Hera frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"I have come with a message for you."

"A message?"

"Beware."

The girl stared at the dark-skinned woman silently for a minute. "That's it? Beware? Not much of a message."

The woman laughed again. "You are a funny one child. That wasn't the whole message. 'Beware the two-faced one. He is on a mission to destroy you. The serpent sleeps yet but will awaken soon and when he does you will be in danger.' "

She'd read books where these sorts of veiled threats had been leveled - the fleet's library had been mainly adult books but her keen mind and voracious appetite for reading had driven her to things she shouldn't have read at her age - and it had always sent a thrill of terror down her spine. She knew she should be afraid now but she wasn't.

That absence of fear terrified her.

"Who is the two-faced one?" she asked calmly.

"You will not know him till he reveals himself."

"Well that's really not helpful," Hera said critically. "How am I supposed to protect myself against an enemy I don't know? Should I be wary of everyone then?"

The Oracle smiled, teeth shining like stars. "You are wise young one. You will survive."

Hera turned back to the pool and threw another pebble in. The ripples swirled, obscuring her view of the bottom.

"It will be exactly like that," the Oracle said softly. "Trust your instincts. They will not fail you."

When Hera turned back to ask her a question, the woman was gone.

She awoke to the intense light and heat of morning. Getting out of bed and padding downstairs, she joined her parents at the breakfast table.

"I had another one," she said, launching into the thing uppermost on her mind without even saying good morning.

Helo and Sharon listened without interruption as she relayed her dream. They'd impressed upon her at their last talk just how important it was that she tell them any future dreams she might have.

"The two-faced one?" Helo asked.

"The serpent?" Sharon countered.

"I wonder if it's someone we know," Helo said, looking at Sharon meaningfully.

Hera shook her head. Her curls bounced into her face. "I don't think so."

Both parents turned to her. "Why?" Sharon asked.

Hera shrugged. "The Oracle said I should trust my instincts and I haven't sensed that anyone we know secretly wants to hurt me."

The two adults shared a look.

"No," Hera argued, knowing what they were thinking. "There have been people who wanted to take me away from you but they didn't want to hurt me, they just wanted to use me to help them."

The breath caught in Helo's throat and he felt his heart skip a beat. How could such a little girl know so much? They hadn't told her anything about what had happened to her in the first two years of her life. How could she know these things? And with such certainty too.

He reached out and took her small hand in his large one. "Don't worry honey. We're here with you. We won't let anyone hurt you."

"I know daddy."

Tears pricked behind his eyes. She hadn't called him daddy since she was a tiny wee thing. Her strength and vulnerability amazed yet saddened him. A girl her age shouldn't have to be going through the things she was. She should be carefree and happy, enjoying her childhood to the fullest. They took that away from her, he thought, anger building within him. For the first time since finding out about Sharon, he felt active anger and distaste for the Cylons. His daughters may be hybrids but he chose to think of them as human. They couldn't be put in the same category as those monsters who'd done such terrible things.

"Can I get some breakfast?" Hera interrupted his thoughts. "I'm starving!"

XXXXX

Kara walked into the hotel room hesitantly, unsure if coming here was a mistake. Only if you can't keep control of yourself, her subconscious said. Talking to Lee on the phone was safe - she could say things, feel things, and not worry about it turning into something more. Being face to face was always more difficult with him. The attraction grew exponentially with each passing minute and before she knew it they were always right there, in each other's personal space.

Too close to resist.

"Thanks for coming," Lee said softly. She could hear the hesitation in his voice and wondered if his heart was pounding as nervously as hers was.

"No problem," she said, feigning nonchalance. "You said you wanted to talk and I can never pass up a chance to get a private audience with the great Apollo."

He smiled, though it didn't reach his eyes. "I'm not Apollo anymore."

"And I'm not Starbuck anymore," she said quietly, meeting his eyes. They both knew it wasn't true - with each other they would always be Apollo and Starbuck. A pair. Two halves of a whole. One didn't exist without the other.

Lee cleared his throat. "Listen Kara, I wanted you to come so we could talk about Zach."

"What about him?" Her defenses had gone up and Lee bit his lip, trying to think of the words to use to make her lower them.

"He's a great kid. We really made a great kid." He smiled.

She returned it. Barely. "But ... " she prompted.

"No buts," he said firmly. "He's a wonderful kid and you and Michael have obviously done a great job of raising him. I just want a chance to be a part of his life."

Her eyes clouded over and he knew this was it. She was pulling back into herself. He wondered why. If she wanted him to be a part of their son's life - and she did - why would she get upset that he wanted the same thing?

"How so?" she asked, voice flat.

"I was thinking maybe he could come visit me - you know, once I've got a place of my own. We could spend some time just getting to know one another and enjoying being together."

"Why can't you do that at our house?" she said, accusation heavy in her words. "You know we'd be happy to have you come visit as often as you'd like."

"It's not the same Kara. Think how you would feel if you were in my place."

Her eyes softened slightly. "I suppose so," she whispered, almost more to herself than to him.

He gave her a quick smile. "I uh ... have a favour to ask too."

"Oh?" The defenses were firmly back up and Lee was confused. It wasn't like he was trying to take Zach away or anything ...

"The US government's got a plan to relocate the survivors. They want to divide us up and move us to different countries."

"That sounds like the sort of thing they would do," she admitted. "What's the problem?"

He took a deep breath. "The problem is that I'm on the list of people slated to be moved to Australia." he swallowed hard. "I'm told that's on the ... "

" ... other side of the planet," she joined. "They can't do that, can they?" she added.

Lee nodded sadly. "They can." He bit his lip. "The thing is, the only way they'll let me stay is if I have proof Zach is my son and a joint custody agreement with you and Michael to prove I'm needed here as one of his parents." He saw the fear spring to her eyes - as if she'd taken a step backwards mentally. "They'll force me to leave if you don't Kara," he said softly, choking on the words. "And then I may not be able to see Zach again. Or you," he added, words barely a whisper.

Silence stretched between them, the only sound two sets of shallow, rapid breathing.

Kara stepped forward and lifted her eyes to meet his. "I won't let that happen," she whispered. "I want you to stay. For our son's sake," she added hurriedly. "I know he wants to be with you."

Lee stepped forward involuntarily till they were barely an inch apart. "And I want to be with him," he breathed. "I've missed him so much in the last eight years."

"He's missed you too." Her eyes fluttered up and down, meeting his and dropping back down to his lips. They were wet and slightly parted. She could feel his breath against her face. It warmed her from the inside out.

His eyes bored into hers, pushing her defenses down and getting right inside. They were warm and liquid - almost brown - darting up and down, drinking in his face as a parched man would a glass of water.

Neither was sure when it happened but before they were aware of it lips were on one another's, hands pulling each other closer till they were pressed firmly together, lips to toes.

"Kara." His whisper was a plea.

"Lee." Hers a need.

They stood, panting, foreheads pressed together, arms around each other's waists. Lee lifted a hand and caressed her cheek with his thumb.

"What are we going to do?"

TBC