It was the softest bed Jyn had ever slept in, and on the first night she had settled into the flat she had slept in it like a log. But as the nights had ticked on she found herself unable to truly get used to the bed: it was too soft, too comfortable, and every time she tried to sleep in it she ended up waking up after a couple of hours scared that something unfamiliar would sneak up on her. It got worse after their social worker Jenny visited for the second time and let them know that they would be put under a probationary period before their case would be looked over again to decide where to go from there.
Cassian had taken it all calmly, had thoroughly looked up everything about the country and its customs that he could possibly find. One thing was certain: if they wanted to find out if the lost monk in Hong Kong was Chirrut, they would need citizenship for a passport and money.
As soon as the woman had left Jyn had turned to him and asked him how much money they needed to be able to get a plane over to this country called Hong Kong.
"Over eight hundred pounds return per person," he replied almost instantly.
The words meant nothing to her, but she knew that even if they scrimped and saved on all the money they were given by social services it would take them months, maybe years before they had enough for even one of them.
But Cassian had seen the worry on her face and had made some microwave pizzas for her. It had worked, if only for a short time before he had gone to bed and Jyn had ended caught up once more in broken sleep.
The clock in the living room had gone twenty-four past two in the morning when she sat on the couch in the living room, her fingers laced together, looking and feeling the most lost since she had arrived in this new world. She had no purpose, no mission and then there was the issue of whether or not that person that might or not be Chirrut... in another world they would have got on a jet, flown right out of here...
"Jyn?" she looked up from her place on the sofa to see him walking towards her, a hand brushing bed hair from his face. "What are you doing up so late?"
"I can't sleep," she said quietly. "It's been getting worse since -"
"Since the social worker came the other day," he said. "I could tell."
He settled next to her on the sofa, his head laid back against a pillow.
"This is becoming too much, Cassian," she said quietly. "Look. We still don't know why we're here, how we got here, who else made it - and any answers we might be within reaching of are all too far away. No passport, no money -"
"I thought of some solutions," he mumbled. "But I don't know if they'll work. I - if this is a new chance for us Jyn... I don't want red in my ledger this time. I want to do it right."
Jyn frowned at him.
"There are people we could go to that would give us IDs, documents, illegal documents that would do the trick. We'd need money, but..."
Jyn sat up straight on the couch.
"Well then what are we waiting for?" she said, looking at him. "Cassian, if there's anything we can do, anything to just break us out of this rut -"
"Jyn, didn't you hear what I said?" Cassian replied. "This is our chance to start things off right! We're not on the run, not hunted, not outlawed in a multitude of cities - I know we can't just up sticks and go anywhere we want but for once we're free. No one expects anything from us here except to live and be good people. Would you sacrifice that chance now?"
She moved backwards on the couch, away from him.
"Cassian. We have nothing here. We're waiting on commands from a people we know nothing about and until they past their judgement we just sit and eat and wait and look at that stupid laptop! Is that really what you want?"
Cassian stood up from the couch.
"You really think we have nothing here?" he said.
She heard the hurt in his voice the moment he spoke and she regretted her words instantly.
"Cassian," she said. "I'm sorry, look, I didn't mean you -"
"You're tired, Jyn," he said quietly, turning to walk towards the door. "Just get some rest. We can talk about it in the morning."
She sat there for a long time after she had heard him walk into his room. He never shut his door at night.
After a while she got up from her place on the couch and walked towards the window. Below her the dark streets of the night rolled out beyond her, the simple looking lights illuminating the residential streets. Below her she heard a neighbour watching some programme on a screen or television. Far in the distance she heard a dog bark: short, persistent yaps.
For as long as she could remember she had never been able to stand like this, just stand and look out across the land before her without being afraid that someone might be watching her, or might aim fire if she was in the wrong place at the wrong time.
The moment sat with her for a long time, seeped into her soul so that she had to swallow to keep her emotions in check.
When she finally moved away from the window it was about ten minutes past four in the morning. Jyn moved lazily, her feet dragging slightly against the floor until she reached his doorway and she slipped inside. He was sleeping deeply - she found he had done that after the first few nights here: sleeping like clockwork, bed at eleven, up at seven, but always a deep sleep. She stood at the edge of his bed for just a moment before slipping under the covers and moving next to him, laying her head against his shoulder.
Her breathing steadied and she hoped even whilst asleep he would understand.
I'm sorry, this meant. I don't have nothing here: I have you, always having my back. Like in Jedha, and Eadu, and Scarif. Now it's another world, and I know you will always have my back here as well. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. We'll work this out together. We will uncover this mystery, you and I. Let's not fight. I'm sorry.
In the morning Cassian woke to find Jyn sleeping peacefully, huddled against his back. He let her tuck herself into his side as he shifted just a little. As he watched her sleep he knew he had to stay on the straight and narrow this time, no matter what. He needed to do right by her, even if she wanted him so desperately not to.
