Author's Note--I refer to the movie Titanic in this chapter. It's not like a full fledge summary or anything, but it's talking about one scene and so I apologize if someone hasn't seen the movie yet.
Troy wasn't one for small talk with parents who he particularly didn't know. In this case, standing at the bottom of the stairs to Jason's house with Cassie five feet away, was one of the most uncomfortable positions Troy was in. It also didn't help that Troy could swear he was hearing his biological father ruffling a newspaper in the background--coming somewhere from the kitchen on the other side of the house.
Troy stood looking down at the ground with his hands clutching deeply into his pant pockets. He snuck a small glance up at Cassie who had the phone to her ear.
"I'm telling you mom. He won't come out of his room to talk to me or Andrew. He's not going to want to talk to you." Cassie's distraught voice almost whined as if she had this conversation a thousand times before then.
She had let Troy into her house once again as it was Sunday; four hours until the funeral. Troy wasn't dressed yet as he was wearing just his average loose fitting blue jeans and a blue t-shirt that showed off his biceps that kept getting bigger and bigger each week from basketball.
He was just about to ask if he could see Jason when Cassie's cell phone rang and the older woman apologized before taking it, telling Troy that it was her mother.
"Mom," Cassie did an eye roll, "He's going through a hard time right now. He just…he won't eat. He won't sleep. He won't talk to anyone other than Gabriella. Andrew and I ran out of ideas on how to help him."
Troy looked up at the mention of Jason not doing anything that his mother had said on the phone. Troy couldn't recall seeing Jason at school on Thursday or Friday along with Gabriella, but he at least knew Gabriella was at her house. His mind must've been so concentrated on her and her father missing basketball practice that he just forgot about Jason in the couple of classes they shared together.
It had seemed as if things were getting better on Saturday. Their friends had all gotten together, and Gabriella and Jason had both been smiling. He must have underestimated their acting skills as they both managed to fool everyone else that they were alright. But most importantly, if Jason was at home sulking in his own grief, and Gabriella wasn't with him, then that must have meant that she didn't know about him. Jason must not have told Gabriella at all about how he was feeling; and in ways Troy respected that. It meant Jason was putting her needs before his own, but in other means, it meant Jason might be suffering more than most people.
"I'm sorry Troy. Sometimes my mom can talk without getting sick of hearing herself." Cassie was already dressed for the funeral Troy noticed as she was wearing a very respectable black cocktail dress that hugged off her modest features. "What can I do for you?"
Suddenly asking to see Jason again felt like an even bigger deal than a minute before when Troy didn't know what was going through the basketball captain's head.
"Um…that's okay Mrs. Cross. I was just here to talk to Jason." His dazzling blue eyes looked through the hair that fell in front of his eyes. "It's kind of…about later today."
"Oh." Her voice peeped and than realization dawned on her that he was talking about the funeral later that evening. "Oh! Yes, go on right up. I'm sure he'll be happy to see you." She said politely with a tight smile as her orbs sparkled with memories of who everyone in town was saying goodbye to that night.
Troy casually turned around, or as casually as he could before scurrying up the stairs. He didn't look twice at the pictures that had been out of his mind the past three days. He just headed straight to Jason's room and knocked quietly on the door.
"I told you mom, I don't want to talk!" Jason's raspy voice could be heard from the other side of the door.
Troy sighed as he let his forehead momentarily fall against the door. How was he expected to talk to Jason when he wasn't even sure if Jason could handle the task? Much less the context that the principal is asking of them?
The brown haired boy took a deep breath before replying, "It's me Cross. We need to talk."
Troy pulled away from the door a little as the cool air around him took over the sticky feeling he had on his skin. The door opened a second later and a disheveled looking Jason stood before him. It looked like he hadn't slept since he heard the news about Anna. And now that he had no strength at his side--his strength being Gabriella without her even knowing it--he looked even more miserable than Troy would've thought.
Things were supposed to get better, but from what Troy has heard and seen, things haven't even begun.
"Look, if it's about tomorrow and practice, I'm not going to miss. I'll still be able to play in the game if I spend an extra hour lifting weights." Jason croaked out without even trying to hold back just how distressed he was feeling.
"No man. That's not at all what I came over here for." Troy looked his brother up and down and noticed he must have been in the middle of getting ready as he was wearing his good dress pants with a white dress shirt only halfway buttoned up. A tie hanging limply on his shoulders. "I got a call from the principal today. He said he couldn't get a hold of you?"
Jason rolled his eyes as his carefree personality still shined through at times. He used his arm that was stationed against the frame of the door as momentum; pushing off to turn around and walk back into his room, leaving Troy to venture in on his own free will.
"What did he want THIS time?" It was fairly obvious that Jason was used to getting phone calls from Principal Matsui. "We haven't gotten into fights for a while now." Jason mused more to himself.
"It's actually about what's going down today." Troy watched as Jason's breathing slowed down for a second as he turned his back on him to busy himself by gingerly looking down at the picture he kept on his bedside table. Troy took an advancing step towards him. "He wanted to know if the whole basketball teams were going to be there. You know, the freshmen team, JV team, and varsity?"
"Yeah, I know what basketball TEAMS mean." He snapped before he shook his head and tried his best counting to ten to calm down a little. The little sleep he was getting finally catching up to him. "So what's up with that man?"
"It seems that Coach Montez is a very respected person within the school board. But not just at East High, did you also know he does all these Community ED leagues for like elementary school so that they can play in mini leagues around town?" Troy asked.
"Yeah. I used to play in those."
"Well at least more than half of Albuquerque knows him. He is on the school board, he teaches all high school students at East High, he takes his time with little kids, and he has a very big impact on kids. Not to mention that Mrs. Montez did the same thing, but with other foundations. Principal Matsui got together with the school's administrators, and they collected money to buy some flowers and a big card that almost everyone at school signed Friday."
"I'm starting to get a headache Bolton. Where do we come into this?" Jason asked while rubbing the side of his face in distaste of this whole situation.
"He wants the varsity basketball team to present this to him during the ceremony. And since you're captain and I'm co-captain, he wants you to be the one to hand the things over." Troy looked up tentatively at Jason as he finally decided to turn around. "It only makes since with how close you are with them."
Jason looked Troy in the eye. He had planned on going to the funeral. He really had. Whether Gabriella needed him or not, he was going to go since he owed that to Anna Montez. The woman who took his mother's spot when she was never home when he was a child growing up. He could barely talk now, what made Troy think that he could talk at the funeral with the casket being lowered into the ground?
"No." Jason breathed out in surprise at his own resistance that showed itself right away.
"What?" Troy blinked in confusion.
"I can't." He rasped out as his skin was starting to overheat. Just the four buttons already in place on his shirt seemed to be suffocating him. He desperately started undoing them as he could feel his throat constricting. "He can't make me."
Troy was afraid of this answer. He knew that there was a big chance of Jason's disapproval once he heard his mom talking on the phone; that's what made this even more awkward.
"Jase…" Troy tried to gain his attention by using the beautiful brunette's nickname for him. He watched as Jason's numb fingers pried at the white buttons. The flimsy white dress shirt falling off of the basketball stars back. "Just wait a sec. Can't you at least think about it?"
Jason shut his eyes violently. He didn't even know if he could make it through the service without crying. He knew his dad wasn't going to cry. He knew that Coach Montez wasn't going to cry in public--even though Coach Montez would probably be dying on the inside. He knew that Gabriella wasn't the type of girl to cry in public. But he was if the circumstances were right, and there was only one circumstance that would leak liquid from his eyes. Anna Montez's final goodbye.
"Think about it Jason, all you have to do is give the flowers to Coach Montez, and I give him the card. It wouldn't be right if I just did it. I hardly knew her compared to you." Troy was practically grasping at thin air as Jason shook his head adamantly.
"You hardly knew her at all." He accused of Troy as his thick fingers ran through his wild hair.
Both boys stared at each other. Cold brown locking with ice blue. A brotherly connection had to have been made as Troy nodded his head in understanding.
"Fair enough. I'll just ask Zeke."
The ceremony had been beautiful. The outside weather had been cooperating so far as they held the service outside instead of in a church. Enough body heat was down in the dark cemetery to light up anyone's future. Anyone that is if their name wasn't Gabriella Montez or Jason Cross. There were so many people down there as Gabriella could only guess that half the stores in town were closed since no one was around.
Music was playing as people started to disperse back to the church that also had a banquet hall in it; enough where everyone could fit and get the food that caterers had brought in. A piano sat close to the grave as this had to have been a first time that Gabriella had seen a piano actually get toed down to play outside. The pianist being the girl Gabriella's mom had talked about who played during Sunday services, Kelsi Neilson.
Gabriella couldn't help but stare as Kelsi's thin fingers ran fluidly over the black and white keys. She was so transfixed on the girl who she has never seen before at school that she didn't notice the warm hand that was placed on her shoulder.
"Ella, it's time to go." Her dad whispered hoarsely.
She looked up at him with wide eyes as she stood up numbly. Her grandparents' salt and peppered hair already blending into the sea of people moving towards the exit.
"Just a minute." Gabriella breathed. "Please? I promise I won't be long."
Carlos looked behind himself as the freshly dug dirt seemed to be mocking him. "I'll wait by the car."
"No, I can walk." Gabriella looked at him meekly. She wrapped her pea coat jacket around her small framer tighter. "It's a little less than a mile. I know where I'm going." She reassured him. She couldn't leave without having a private moment with her mother.
Carlos glanced around worriedly as she was the only thing he had left. It was hard to let her go do her own things too. But he knew that there was nothing else he could do for her. Not even Jason could do anything for her as he couldn't even support himself when it came to the basketball team bringing the flowers and card forward. Carlos nodded his head weakly.
"Don't be long Sweetie."
"I won't."
Carlos was about to walk away when something pulled on his heart, "I love you."
Gabriella looked up in surprise. "I love you too."
He walked silently away as didn't hear Gabriella move from her spot in the soft grass. He stopped halfway across the lawn as a male figure caught his eye. Carlos approached the boy and patted him firmly on the shoulder. It was obvious the boy had been crying.
"Is she coming?" He rasped out as his one hand was clutching onto the tree trunk he was standing next to.
"She will. She just needs time son."
Jason nodded his head, "Understandable. I'll just wait for her and drive her back to the church. That is if you don't mind." Jason knew that all their other friends had already left to head to the church. There was no use in stopping Gabriella to grieve with her in the cemetery where the said person they were grieving for was so close. Troy had also left since he drove with Chad, and had no other choice but to go unless he wanted to catch a ride with Jason, and since Jason didn't offer, Troy never thought about staying.
"Actually, we just need to give her time Jase. There's nothing we can do but give her time." Carlos advised as they saw Gabriella kneel down next to the freshly carved tombstone.
"But I--"
"Jase, you're like a son to me. Gabriella is my daughter. We both know that she needs time, and she won't get any better if you're waiting on her hand and foot." Carlos saw the sadness pierce Jason's eyes once again. "Plus, I think Gabriella's getting kind of sick being catered on. She said this morning that she wanted to go back to school Monday."
Jason shook his head as both men turned to leave. "You're right. I don't know how I could be so stupid. I should've known that she was tired of being waited on. I was just trying to make her feel better."
"You are. You are." Carlos shushed. "But space is also good, and I think we both know that Gabriella needs that when things are bad."
"You're wrong." Jason said as they stopped at Jason's car that Carlos walked him too. "Things aren't just bad; they're hell. Can't you see that?"
"Believe me, I can see that perfectly fine."
When Gabriella was fifteen her favorite movie was Titanic. She had watched that movie over and over again. Whether she was with Jason or not, she watched it at least once every night for a month. She would do homework while watching it. She would clean her room while listening to the dialogue in the background. She would write fantasy stories for her Writing Skills class based upon the movie and the feelings some of the not so famous characters might have been feeling.
But there was one thing that Gabriella didn't understand. When she enveloped herself into the story, and actually sat down to do a paper on it. She always liked to emerge herself into the story as if she was the character feeling what they did in the movie. But there was just one scene in the movie that was her favorite, and it was only her favorite because that was the only scene that she couldn't decipher Rose's feelings--the scene where she's running to the back of the boat to jump over the edge.
Gabriella couldn't understand for the life of her why someone would want to commit suicide. But it was the way that Rose looked, the way that she handled herself in that scene that drew Gabriella. She looked so scared. So weak. So vulnerable.
That's exactly how Gabriella felt when she was back at the church, surrounded by hundreds of people eating around her.
She couldn't breath.
She quietly slipped outside of the banquet room. Silently noting that her father had a little stubble on his face while the little hairs were accompanied with a solemn face. He was talking to all four of her grandparents as they were all standing there drinking their tea; no doubt talking about Gabriella and how distant she had been the past days.
Gabriella had slipped past the table that sat her friends--the gang--Troy and Chad included now that they've seemed to be through so much with them in such a short time. She could feel Troy's eyes on her as they watched her petite body leave the crowded room.
She was trying so desperately not to run to the exit without drawing attention to herself.
She had come in late. By the time she did enter her hands were nearly raw from walking in the breeze outside. Everyone was either standing in line to get food or were sitting down. She knew eyes had been drawn to herself, but she didn't care as she respectfully took her seat next to her father.
Gabriella heard the soft click to the door behind her as she was finally outside. The sun was gone as the sky was a dark gray; indicating that it was going to storm out. Gabriella softly smiled up at the afternoon sky as it matched her feelings perfectly.
"It's peaceful out here, isn't it?" A quiet voice asked as Gabriella's head snapped forward to see the same pianist that was playing the piano at the funeral sitting down on the stone railing.
Gabriella took in the kind girl's features and lifted her small shoulders a little. "I'm sorry. I didn't know anyone was out here."
Gabriella was about to turn around as part of her couldn't help but take her time as there was just something about this girl that struck Gabriella in the mind; making her first instincts kick in and instantly knowing that the girl was nice.
"You don't have to go." Kelsi spoke up. "I'm Kelsi by the way."
"Gabriella." She breathed out as she ran a hand through her hair and sat down on the ledge besides Kelsi. "We go to school together?"
"Yeah, but I don't expect you to know me. I'm into music, and well…you're you."
Gabriella furrowed her brows as her small legs swung in the mid air. "What do you mean by that?"
"Well you're a cheerleader. Not exactly the same as a band person." Kelsi smiled at Gabriella. "But that's okay. Really."
There was a silence as there was just something about Kelsi's reassuring tone that reminded Gabriella of someone she used to know. That someone being her mother. Kelsi had brown hair. Gabriella noticed that instead of at the cemetery where she was wearing contacts, she now was wearing glasses. And instead of wearing her ole stuffy professional clothes, Kelsi had changed into a pair of blue jeans and t-shirt.
"I'm sorry about your mother." Kelsi apologized as if it was her fault Anna had passed away.
Gabriella looked out into the horizon as on one side of the church there were woods. A dark setting was overlooking them, but the way Kelsi's presence lighted up the atmosphere by just being her usual nice and caring self seemed to light up the situation a little.
Gabriella felt tears prick her eyes as there was just so much caring emotions in the girl's voice. Not that her dad, Jason, and Troy didn't sound caring--not at all as they had been anything but--but just the way that a stranger who only went to school with Gabriella out of a thousand kids made Gabriella realize that Kelsi knew her mother too. They had probably been going to church together for a long time, and Gabriella knew that her mom always used to boast about Kelsi's abilities with the piano.
"Shit happens." Gabriella sniffled as she wiped away her tears almost violently.
"Want to talk about it?" Kelsi asked in her natural quiet voice.
Gabriella glanced at the girl who was strangely making Gabriella at ease with her natural ability to talk so easily with someone in need.
"I don't want to bore you."
"I hardly doubt that. I'm just waiting for my mom to pick me up. I've got time." Kelsi offered encouragingly.
Gabriella shut her eyes momentarily. Her voice coming out much more quieter than normal. "Sometimes I can still hear her. The night it happened I waited in the Coroner's Office and I only closed my eyes for a second--I swear--and I thought I heard her. And then last night…" Gabriella voice shook as her hands gripped the stone; leaving microscopic cuts on her hands.
Gabriella imagined tiny people inside of herself, controlling her different emotions, strengths, and senses. Somehow one of the many people inside of her managed enough courage to have it course through her veins. Admitting things out loud about what she was feeling was never a strong point in her life. She was used to only one person, and fortunately she had seen Jason at his weakest point in life so far, and she couldn't just dump her own problems on him.
She took a shaky breath as she concentrated on what she was trying to say; completely starting a new sentence. "It's getting harder and harder to go through each minute pretending I'm okay. I have people watching me almost constantly now as my dad probably thought I was ready to commit suicide today with the way he was looking at me."
Gabriella took a sideways glance as Kelsi before standing up. The little people inside of her flipping 180 degrees as her voice became harder now. It was almost dangerous as it remained in it's quiet fashion.
"I'm sick of feeling sad. I'm sick of feeling angry. I'm sick of feeling ashamed that I'm lying to my friends to make them think I'm okay when I'm not. I need space to figure everything out and them watching me like I'm in a glass box is not helping." Gabriella looked at the doors leading back inside where she knew to be handfuls of people waiting for her. "But I put on a smile and tell them I'm okay. Because that's how it's supposed to be. I hide my hurt and then break down every night in my room because if I cried in front of them then it would scare them."
Gabriella started for the door, but hovered just a moment longer as she didn't see the surprise face Kelsi had on. "I'm not that kind of girl. The kind who goes around causing drama and all that. I just want everyone else to be okay, but just don't tell, okay?"
Kelsi was stunned beyond belief. The view non jocks at school got about Gabriella and her friends were not pleasant pictures. It had never occurred to her that Gabriella was feeling so much like that.
"…okay, yeah."
Gabriella nodded her head with her back still turned towards the quiet girl. "You're a good listener. Thank you."
"Where is she?" Sharpay whispered as she was drastically holding onto Zeke's hand at the table they were all sitting at towards the back corner where the one of many doors were located.
Everyone was either busy thinking as funerals always brought out the nerves in people, or they were talking to one another that they didn't notice the looks the basketball captain was sending Troy.
"You did good today Troy." Jason said in a quiet voice; a voice no one would hear if they weren't particularly listening to Jason specifically. It was a miracle that even Troy heard it.
Troy glanced at Jason as the color to his eyes had been lost days before. "Did I? I didn't notice," his meek voice admitted as it had a final tone in it that indicated to Jason that Troy absolutely never wanted to talk about it again.
"You really like her, don't you?" Between any other people this conversation would've been inappropriate at a funeral.
"Do you even have to ask?" Anger laced silently into Troy's tone as his tan hand gripped the water glass a little too harshly. "I watched them bury her mother today, and she didn't shed one tear. Who wouldn't fall for such a strong girl like her?"
The words stung, but Troy would never be able to take them back.
"There she is." Taylor pointed out as Gabriella walked confidently into the room. There was something different about her that Troy couldn't figure out, but he would soon. That he was sure of.
"I wasn't asking about Gabi. Where is SHE?" Sharpay's demanding voice was whispered.
"Shar!" Taylor exclaimed so that the tables around them heard and momentarily looked over at the teenagers with disapproving looks. Taylor leaned over the table a little bit and hissed, "You can't just ask that here!"
"Why not? I DON'T understand. Where did Anna go? I've never been to church. I don't know what the priest or minister or pasture or whatever the hell that guy is was talking about."
"She's in heaven." Jason's gruff voice spoke up for the first time around his friends that evening. Talking to Troy moments before hardly counted as talking with his friends. "Where else would she have gone?"
"I have some good news guys." Zeke said as the table got quiet once again. "We're still all planning on going to the cabin next weekend, right?" He looked everyone in the eye as no one said anything. "My parents booked the beach just for us. So no one else will be around." Zeke looked around at everyone's unsure faces. "We're all still going, right?"
For the first time in a very long time, Sharpay grasped Zeke's hand within her own now and squeezed lightly. "I think we all need a vacation."
Troy looked up at Gabriella who was silently sipping at a glass of diet coke. He knew that within that one look he took of her, that if out of anyone, she needed it the most.
Author's Note--I know that there wasn't any direct contact of Gabriella and Troy, but a little look into the future--next chapter and the chapter after that there will be heaps of it! I'm so excited to right the next couple of chapters, all I need is for you guys to review this to show that you at least liking or disliking the direction I took all of this. Plus, if people are mad that there wasn't any Troyella in this chapter, then I also want to point out that this story is about friendship and romance. The romance being Troy and Gabriella while the friendship has to do with everyone.
Thanks.
