Oh my gentle readers and my best beloveds – sorry this didn't get out sooner. Apparently ffnet was having issues. In the news – Peeka-chan is my new editor and so now all the mistakes in here are entirely my fault and I can't even blame them on my speed reading anymore. Peeka – you make me laugh with your comments and the way you notice the details. Cloud's STILL not managing to pull anything past you, is he? Kueilan!! You're back!! Oh, you make me so happy, I love your chapter by chapter reviews. And, me too. I hate it when a writer's main character can't hold his own against his rivals without his rivals being written as idiots or jerks. I really wanted the readers to be able to root for everyone in this – I'm glad you think I'm doing a decent job of it. And yeah – Squall/Leon and Cloud – cute even unconscious. Zi-ling – there you are! Oh, I'm glad it was you. You're right on the ball ;) How could I resist really? And Horky – oh, your reviews really make my day. Yep, Cid is too much fun to resist writing and yeah, couldn't resist a towel incident. Thanks to all that have told me my world is familiar and yet original – I'm trying to keep it from being predictable (oh, you guys are going to hate me right about chapter 34/35…) But now, without further ado – if ff will let us – on with the show ~
Chapter 30: The Morning After
Tifa woke up and lay there for a long time without a single thought in her head. She was lying on her stomach - not the most comfortable position for someone with a chest like hers - but not bad. There were bodies piled on top of hers and as she squinted her eye open and turned her head a little she could see Denzel's rust colored hair and the corner of an elbow in Marlene's favorite pajamas and a glimpse of the back of Aerith's head was just visible. Tifa's face relaxed into a smile and she lay where she was for a long time, just soaking in the feel of the moment. Finally she wiggled her way out of the pile, reluctant but starving. Her throat felt raw and her fingers and legs throbbed a little. Reaching into her drawer, she pulled out the warmest shirt she could find and long pants. Peeking out to make sure the hallway was empty she walked over to the bathroom and changed as she got ready for the day. Feeling vaguely more human but needing coffee and food to complete the transformation, she padded back out into the house, feet clad in thick socks to stay warm and headed toward the kitchen. Stopping by the bedroom, she left her pajamas neatly folded inside it. She noticed Yuffie was asleep on the mattress, and wondered when that had happened. Last night was still a bit blurry in her head.
Cloud and, surprisingly Shera, were sitting at the table in the kitchen when she walked in and Cloud's head turned towards the sound as she opened the door to walk in. His blue eyes focused on her face for an instant and then he was quickly looking back down at the coffee mug in his hands and Tifa thought for a second his cheeks had gone pink. She blinked in puzzlement.
O-kay... Giving Shera a friendly nod, Tifa walked over to the coffee pot and stretched up to get a mug from the cabinet. She really needed to start using the mugs out in the bar. All the mugs she usually used were down on the drying rack and all she had left were way up on the top shelf. It made her shirt inch up as she caught at one with her fingertips. Cloud's chair grated as he pushed it back from the table abruptly and, mumbling something intelligible, he disappeared out the door. Tifa turned her head to see him rubbing the back of his head a second before the door shut. And then Shera hunched forward over her own mug and started to laugh.
And right about then, it hit Tifa like someone smacking her on the back of the head.
Towel!
She'd been in a towel the last time he'd seen her! Her eyes went wide and the heat flushed through her entire face and throat. Oh. Oh! He and Leon – and she'd only been in a towel… oh. oh, crap! Tifa almost dropped her mug and turned around to look at Shera in horror. Sure, her 'Rita' outfit hadn't covered much more than a well-wrapped towel but – oh, a towel was entire different than being fully clothed!
"You know?" she asked Shera in horror and the other woman grinned.
"I saw," she answered. "I was coming out of your dad's room just as you were disappearing into your room. I couldn't get a cognizant sentence out of Leon for a good ten minutes. Though – to his credit – he was trying."
Tifa winced and made a pained sound. Shera shook her head and smiled.
"Don't worry about it. If I had a body like yours I'd be wearing a heck of a lot less than you do all the time."
"No, you wouldn't," Tifa poured herself a cup of coffee and took Cloud's vacated chair, on more familiar footing talking to other women about her figure than dealing with the fact that guys she considered friends had – what? Realized she was a girl? She shook her head.
"You'd get tired of guys staring at your chest all the time and you'd always be suspicious about why they were being friendly. Because they liked your personality or your – " she cocked a good-natured eyebrow, "other assets."
Shera giggled.
"Is it really that bad?"
Tifa shrugged with a smile and shook her head.
"Depends on what I'm wearing. But I haven't been worried about it with any of the guys that are staying here. It's been nice."
Shera smiled.
"They're all good boys. Even yours."
Tifa nodded cheerfully and then blinked.
"You mean Denzel, right?"
Shera started to laugh again. "You're adorable," Shera told her fondly. She waved a small hand toward the door Cloud had just gone out as she took a laughing sip of her tea. "Both of you."
Tifa glanced toward the door and decided it was safer to sip her coffee than try to respond. Shera looked at her through her glasses as the laughter slowly faded.
"So – how did it go last night?"
Tifa looked up and thought she saw a hint of sympathy in the other woman's brown eyes. She gave a weak smile and wrapped her fingers more firmly around the heat of the coffee mug.
"We did it," she answered even though the other woman probably already knew that. Her shoulders moved and she looked down into her coffee. "It wasn't – at all what I'd expected." Mentally, Tifa was still sorting through everything and she wasn't sure if it would ever fit into neat little boxes she could label as one thing or another. Shera nodded.
"I remember my first run. It was – I don't think anything really prepares you for that kind of thing and all the confusing emotions that hit you at the end."
Tifa tipped her head as she looked at the other woman.
"How did you end up doing this?" she asked and Shera looked down at her mug, cheeks staining pink. It seemed to be the morning for that kind of thing.
"I – I was a scientist. In the space program Shinra was trying to start. The Captain – Cid - was a pilot and he was going to be the first man to ever make it to space. I think it had been his dream since before he was born. Everyone knew it. Everyone knew his entire life had been working toward that single point."
She paused and Tifa, bartender that she was, knew better than to interrupt. Shera shrugged a shoulder and stared at her tea.
"I – I thought something was wrong with the spaceship. I went in to check it out. Just before launch. I just – I knew something was wrong. You know?" she asked and Tifa nodded as the other woman looked at her in equal mixes of despair and fierce certainty. "The countdown was running and we were going to miss the window but – I was sure. So I didn't leave when they wanted me to. The Captain could have gone anyway but the heat from the rocket would have killed me. He'd – he'd wanted the stars all his life. It was all he ever wanted. But – he stopped the countdown. For me. And then Shinra decided not to try again. They thought that there were better ways to invest their money and resources. The Captain lost the stars. Because of me."
Tifa reached across the table and laid her hand over the other woman's and Shera raised her head to give her a small smile.
"The Captain will never forgive me but I – I need to make it up to him. So when he joined Leon – so did I." She shook her head and looked back down at her drink. "Since then I've seen what Shinra does and covers up with their money and their sharp suits and – I'd do what I do anyway. But I started for The Captain."
Tifa thought of the way Cid had refused to leave Shera's side while she'd been hurt and suspected that the emotions Cid held for the small woman went a bit far off of 'unforgiveness'. She just gave Shera's hand a light squeeze though. Who was she to talk about relationships?
"Uh" the sound from the door had Tifa lifting her head to see Leon hovering in the doorway, looking awkward. It was the first time she thought she'd ever seen him that way. He rubbed the lobe of his ear and he couldn't seem to meet Tifa's eyes. "Is this girl stuff? Should I come back later?"
It made Tifa smile, which helped with the heat she felt automatically on her cheeks, and she stood up, giving Shera a wink as she pulled her own retreat in a way she hoped would smooth things over.
"No. We're done. I'm going to make breakfast."
It turned out to be a very late lunch. Not because Tifa was making sandwiches – she made eggs anyway – but because of the time of day. Apparently they'd all slept hard and long. Leon sat at the table while Tifa chopped vegetables and added them to the eggs she was scrambling on the stove in a giant pan. Shera sat with him and Leon ran through the basics of their mission for her, relaxing as he talked and finally able to look at Tifa without turning red.
He left out the lab and overblew Tifa's part as far as Tifa could tell. Apparently, after Cloud had seen her escape through the lower hallway, the rest of them had made a break for the motorpool and ridden out in a military issue car. No one had even thought to stop them. They'd gone back to the outside crowd to keep an eye out for Tifa but they'd had to leave when more soldiers and the Turks started showing up. They'd picked up their disguises and ridden the train back down from Sector Six.
Then it was Tifa's turn to tell her part of the story while she added cheese to the eggs and started serving them. By then, everyone had wandered in. Tifa was vague about the SOLDIER, referring to him as 'this guy' and left out the dead scientist entirely. When she mentioned the stairs at the pillar, Leon started to grin.
"Clever," he complimented her and Cloud quietly stated:
"I told you she was."
Tifa flashed them both a bright grin as she set their plates down in front of them. Leon looked up at her as he chewed the first bite.
"You used materia," he commented and Cloud, Shera and Yuffie all looked up and over at her in surprise.
"Not very well," Tifa admitted, piling her own plate of food high now that everyone else was served. Leon stood up so she could take his seat at the table but she shook her head at him and leaned her back against the counter while she ate. Half of the group was doing the same, with Leon, Aerith, and the two kids at the table.
"You've got materia?" Yuffie blurted and Cloud shot her a level look. Tifa lowered her head.
"It's not really mine. I just – borrowed it."
"Do they know you 'borrowed' it?"
"Yuffie." Cloud's single word stopped the girl from going further.
"You used it amazingly well," Leon said, getting back to the subject. "For a single burst you waited until everyone was trapped and you set off a pretty big blast when you did fire it off. Are you used to using materia?"
"That was my first," Tifa admitted cheerfully.
"Isn't it a rush?" Yuffie didn't deflate for long and it made Tifa stifle a laugh.
"It was fun," she admitted. Leon looked thoughtful.
"Do you think you could 'borrow' more if we needed it?"
Tifa was very careful not to look at Aerith.
"I think that was it."
Still, Leon nodded.
"It was still impressive. We'll have to make it a point to get you some more."
"More?" Tifa asked, thinking of the cost on the market for the tiny globes. Leon grinned suddenly at her and went back to eating.
"It does show up naturally in some places too, you know. And we're not above 'borrowing' from Shinra ourselves if we need something. We'll see."
After that everyone concentrated on eating for a long time and then Leon and Aerith washed the dishes while Tifa went up to check on her father. He roused briefly, just enough to complain that she hadn't been there last night and that Barrett was terrible at fluffing pillows. It was her father's version of a joke and it made her smile even as the tears clogged in her throat as she noticed how thin he looked and how quickly he fell back asleep afterward.
Cloud was waiting for her in the hallway when she let herself out of the room. She gave him a tired smile of greeting and he pushed away from the wall to walk over and looked down at her. As close as he was she could almost imagine she felt the warmth of him and she started to lower her head before he could see in her eyes how badly she just wanted to be wrapped in that warmth. He reached down and lifted her chin however, and – even though she noticed pink on his cheeks – his eyes were very serious as they searched her face. Looking, she realized, for physical damage.
"I'm fine," she murmured and his eyes moved to hers.
"They can't know you were there," his voice was low. Determined. "If they see marks on you, someone might put everything together."
It made the smile bloom tiredly on her lips again and she softened. She'd already thought of that – but it was sweet and intimate that Cloud had worried about the same thing she had. Without thinking about it, her hands rose and rested against the steady warmth of his shirt.
"My hands are the only thing anyone can see when I'm dressed this way. I'm going to say I broke a crate of beer and cut them on the glass."
"Are you going to make Barrett clean it up again?" he asked and when her eyebrows rose, the edges of his lips shifted upward. "He might have been griping cheerfully about it the other day."
It pulled a soft chuckle out of her and she saw the light rise – and then fade in his eyes. Without being able to understand why she could feel it, she could feel him start to withdraw from her. Without even moving. Her fingers tightened on his shirt.
"Remember our promise?" she asked and he looked down at her, puzzled and she knew it was that she even had to ask, not over what promise she was talking about. His chin moved, a single nod. Looking up at him, into those beautiful tropic eyes of his, she whispered:
"I think I need - would like - a hug? If – you - wanted to." She stumbled over the words but – what she saw in his eyes – did he really think - ? – actions spoke louder than any words in her family…
His face softened and warmth moved into his eyes in such a slow wash that it set a matching heat through her chest. His arms slipped around her and pulled her close in against him and Tifa couldn't help the soft whisper of relief that escaped her as she felt his warmth surround her, as she felt his solid, steady form cradle her. The exhale she let out seemed to go on forever and her body just seemed to entirely unwind in the safety of his.
"I don't care" she whispered it into his shoulder but she knew he heard by the way he stiffened. "You're Cloud. That's all that matters." Did he really think anything she'd seen in that lab changed anything at all between them? "You're Cloud." She felt the way his arms tightened almost painfully around her to pull her even deeper into him.
'My Cloud' she added to herself as she snuggled in against his chest and held his shirt tightly in her bruised fingers. Admitting to herself what she'd already known and told herself she wasn't going to do. God, help her… she was falling in love with Cloud Strife.
She didn't know how long she stood that way, completely lost in the warm and wonderful feel of him as he leaned back against the wall and she leaned into him. She'd been wrong…
Materia wasn't the best feeling in the world…
Finally she drew back, just a little. Just enough to raise her face to him. His cerulean eyes were already open and watching her and she gave him a soft smile that he returned without thought.
"Just in time," she whispered up at him and watched the smile on his face grow, looking as young and shadowless as his eyes. Careful to keep one arm secure around her, he raised his other hand to hesitantly brush the hair back from her face and she smiled at him when he did.
"Tifa" Barrett's voice came from down the stairs. "You want me to open the bar, girl? You got customers nosing at the door."
"No," she turned her head so she didn't call it into Cloud's ear. "I'll be right down. And Barrett – could you grumble about having to clean up the crate of beer I dropped on the cellar steps today when you're in the bar?"
It was silent at the foot of the stairs for a minute and then a chuckle sounded.
"Sure, baby girl."
Tifa looked back up at Cloud and gave him a smile.
"Time for you to climb out the window," she teased and for just a split second, a grin opened up the light of his face. Pulling away from him, Tifa went down the stairs – feeling light and full of life again, and yet soft and full of a wonderful secret. Having no idea what that soft light in her eyes did to the hearts of more than one of the men waiting outside that she greeted them with a cheerful smile as she unlocked the bar and flipped the sign to announce it was open.
She was just finishing passing out the first round when Cloud let himself in the front door with an embarrassed duck of his head and silently made his way to the stool at the far side of the bar to take up his usual place. Stifling a smile, Tifa silently served him his usual drink and went back to work, very aware of the quiet blue eyes that watched her as she made her rounds.
