welcome back, gentle readers. Yeah - like I was really going to let them live happily ever after in Costa del Sol *snort*... but on to my best beloveds. Dis - yep, I should pull an Old Yeller on Cloud and Zack and have Tifa come wandering in at the end and wonder what the hell is wrong with them. And - you knew - paradise couldn't last. As for Zack, right now your guess is as good as mine - he's blithly writing himself and I haven't got a clue where he's going in that area. zi-ling - oh my consistant best beloved, yeah, I couldn't resist giving them a bit of a beach bum lifestyle for a while. Totally based it off of the Florida Keys - you know, without the drug culture. Though... Wanda's wacky jam...hmmm. Zackssister - hey and welcome to the party! Thanks for the continuity check - I write these chapters in fits and bursts and I know I've missed details before. I'll go back and fix it when I get the chance so thanks for the head's up. And yeah... dear little sister Yuffie - you just HAVE to have siblings to show up and ruin 'moments'. Of course, when they don't , you end up with things like Chapter 47.... And, speaking of which, to my lovely Peeka-chan for putting up with my fascination with dashes in the middle of sentences, you liked it so Chapter 47 is for you and now I'm going to have to find more ways to include weather in my story ;) Also, Red asks - if he eats Zack, does he win 'favorite spot' by default?

Chapter 45: Paradise Lost

Zack was whining. It was cute and a little bit humorous – but it was definitely whining.

"Are we done yet?" he wanted to know and when Tifa just shook her head and otherwise ignored him, he turned around to tell Cloud:

"I told you we just should have run, man. No matter how sweet the woman seems, when they go shopping they turn Pure Evil."

Cloud, his own arms as full of packages as Zack's were, didn't comment, apparently going with 'stoic' as his defense against the insult of being dragged into shopping. Tifa rolled her eyes at both of them and looked down at Red next to her. Red didn't need clothes but Tifa suspected he'd come along to laugh silently at the men. She turned her attention back to Zack.

"Look. We're almost out of clothes. Short of what we came here in, you've only got that obnoxious neon colored flower shirt – "

"Hey!"

"And I can't keep patching up Cloud's two t-shirts, though I can only assume his boat mates actually use him as bait the way those things get ripped up."

"…."

"So we're going to buy you both clothes. And me as well because I still can't figure out what was in 'Wanda's Wacky Jam' but the stain isn't coming out of my dress."

"It tasted like blueberries."

"Oh… Zack… you actually ate that?"

"Cloud helped."

"…."

"Did I not just mention that whatever Wanda put into it – it's permanent enough to stain fabric – after several washing and various home remedies."

"It tasted like blueberries."

"Just for that you're getting an extra shirt."

"Teeeeeeef!"

"Extra shirt, Zack. Cloud, you can't wear dark colors all the time. Don't you get hot out on the boat dressed in black? Don't look at me that way, Cloud Strife. Okay, fine. Get the shirt. No, Zack. No!"

"But, Teef – it's got little tiki men in-between the giant flowers. I can make them dance when I wiggle the shirt. See?"

"It's like shopping with five year olds," Tifa commented to the air in general.

And right about then was when the screaming started. Surprisingly, it wasn't Zack.

All four of them jerked around toward the sound. And at almost the same time, they all dropped what they were holding and bolted toward it.

The main shopping district of Costa del Sol was near the docks. It was the first thing disembarking cruise passengers passed and the last thing they went through on their way out. As marketing ploys went, Tifa thought it was pretty clever. The screaming was coming from the docks and Tifa followed behind Cloud and Zack, letting them be the break between her and the crowd running in the opposite direction from them. Behind the taller men, Tifa saw what they saw a little bit later than they did.

There was a newly arrived cruise ship but it wasn't docked at the port. It had run aground into the dock itself and now it listed badly to the side. By the time they arrived, most of what was left of the docks was cleared of people and Tifa raised her face to see – something – moving on top of the deck of the ship. Something huge and – discolored. Monster?

"Shit," Zack commented just as Tifa realized the same thing. The guys had left their swords at home. Giant cutlery wasn't exactly the kind of thing you wore around town when you were trying to fit in.

"Red!" Tifa turned but the giant beast was already bounding back the way they'd come. Tifa turned back to the – the thing twisting unnaturally on the ship. Logically, they should wait until Red got back with the swords…

"Cloud!" Zack scooped up a large beach umbrella from a nearby outdoor café and tossed it to the blond man. The look on Cloud's face was dubious but he caught the umbrella one handed. Zack pulled up one for himself and turned back to see Cloud had broken off the tines and the fabric of the umbrella, leaving him with a jagged pole.

"I was gonna do that," Zack commented, following suit. Cloud's blue eyes found Tifa's brown ones.

"Stay back."

She'd hung around Zack too long.

"Like hell."

"Tifa – this isn't a normal -"

"Incoming!" Zack announced as the discolored creature seemed to pour over the side of the ship and onto the dock. Tifa had never seen anything like it before and she'd gotten pretty used to fighting monsters in their travels. This though… this was wrong. She couldn't think of any other word to describe it. Her body itself reacted to the unnatural nature of it - gut twisting as her skin crawled. The color was – wrong. Sickly and dead looking and the way it moved – everything about it screamed that - somehow – it wasn't right. It shouldn't be. Tifa wasn't about to let the boys fight it alone though, especially since they didn't have their swords or materia. Unarmed combat was her strength.

For people fighting with umbrellas, Cloud and Zack proved they could still deal out damage and Tifa moved in to take advantage of the weak spots they opened up for her, her skin shuddering each time it came into contact with the bizarre monster's flesh. She took damage too. They all took damage. The creature threw electric around like water and more than once it drove Tifa to her knees. And then Red was there with her gloves and the boys already had their swords. She pulled the gloves on and saw the materia already in its slots on them. Clenching her fists, she felt the familiar fabric and weight.

She was surprised to find she was smiling as she moved back into combat.

She didn't see who struck the killing blow but finally the creature was shuddering and collapsing into itself and watching that was almost disturbing enough to make Tifa feel sick to her stomach. There was just something so – unnatural about it. Tifa couldn't explain it but ever fiber in her felt it. She moved closer to Cloud as they stepped forward to look at it.

"It's – shrinking?" Zack asked cautiously and Tifa thought he was right. Cloud's face was set and pale under his tight skin. The once huge monster continued shrinking until suddenly it was not only smaller than the swords the guys used, it was shaped like:

"Is that – an arm?" Tifa asked, feeling sick to her stomach again and almost pressing her fingers to her lips before realizing she really wanted to wash her hands before she touched anything else, especially her mouth. Cloud's face was white at the edges of his lips and eyes.

"Holy – " Zack managed as the arm flickered and dissolved into nothing but a jelled mass that smelled of rot and dark cave floors. Tifa pressed her hand over her mouth despite her best intentions and even Zack looked pale. But Cloud –

Cloud looked as if he'd seen a ghost. No. Cloud looked as if one of his nightmares had just walked into reality. The mess on the dock bubbled and disappeared, leaving a discolored mark on the wood and a horrible smell in the air. Tifa looked over at Cloud, worried on more levels than she had been originally. Like a man in a trance, Cloud started forward and Zack shot Tifa a questioning look she returned without an answer. Together they both followed Cloud as he climbed the ramp of the ship.

The deck was littered with dead bodies.

"Oh – no…" it slipped out of her despite the fact it was a pointless thing to say and Tifa knelt to touch one of the newly dead. Red stood next to her and even his golden eyes looked sad. Cloud moved forward, brows low over his eyes now and he stooped to turn over body after body. Zack caught on to what he was doing before Tifa did.

"These aren't electric burns."

Tifa looked at the dead body she was gently laying back down and realized he was right. None of the wounds she'd gotten from the monster had looked like these. In fact – the wounds on the discarded dead looked –

They looked a lot more like the wounds on the monster. They looked like sword slices. Cloud straightened from the last body on the deck. Tifa had seen how full these cruise ships could be and knew there would be more bodies inside the ship. Cloud's face was set and empty.

"This is my fault." Cloud's voice was quiet. And utterly hollow.

"What?" Zack jumped in right away. "That's crazy!"

Tifa stood up and walked over to put her hand on Cloud's arm and for the first time he turned his face away from her. He didn't shrug her hand off though.

"Cloud?" she asked softly. And almost reluctant, he told her:

"Sephiroth."

Zack recognized the word before Tifa did and came over to stand next to her.

"Sephiroth? The SOLDIER that died in the Wutai War?"

Cloud's head jerked once in his single nod and he looked young, still looking away from them both. Tifa felt the sudden need to protect him which hardly made sense considering he was the one that swung a giant, oversized sword around as if it was a broom handle. But she slipped her hand down into his, matted glove to matted glove, and gave a light tug.

"Not here." Standing amid dead bodies, covered in gore wasn't the place for questions or confessions. Which is what she thought might be coming. "Come on," she gave Cloud's hand a light tug and he came with her as she started to move away from the carnage. Zack, frowning, followed, looking back at the bodies.

Tifa waited until they were back at their cottage. She hoped that someone would collect and set aside the packages they'd bought and dropped but going back for them right now wasn't a priority. She got her boys all into the tiny living room area of their home and then went and got damp wash clothes for everyone and cold drinks. Cloud still wore the young, haunted look on his face and Tifa had to resist the urge to just pull him into her arms and hold him. He wasn't a little kid though, no matter what his eyes looked like, and she knew being held wasn't what he needed at the moment. So she handed him a washcloth and set the drink down on the table in front of him. Then she sat down on the table too, stripping off her gloves and methodically washed her face before starting on cleaning her hands. She was content to work in silence until Cloud was ready but Zack spoke up immediately:

"So what's this with Sephiroth? He's like, the greatest hero SOLDIER's ever turned out. They said it took a whole Wutai battalion to take him down. Its one of the reasons the war ended so quickly afterward. The Shinra grunts went nuts when they found out."

Cloud, methodical washing his hands, shook his head and didn't look up. His voice was rough.

"It only took one person to kill him. A Shinra grunt."

"What?" Zack all but jumped in surprise and he leaned closer to Cloud.

"I… killed him," Cloud confessed without pride, the words sounding stuck in his throat. "He – found something. In Wutai. He went crazy. He killed... everyone." Cloud's head shook, not in denial, but as if he were trying to shake away the things only he could see in front of his eyes. Tifa reached out and took his hand. His fingers closed unconsciously tight over hers. He pulled in a breath. "Shinra, Wutai, innocents and soldiers, he was killing everyone. There was a little girl – defending… it."

"Yuffie?"

Cloud nodded, buried deep in his memories and Zack shot Tifa a look that she shook her head at. Later…

"He was going to kill her. I – couldn't let him. I – used a friend's sword. Caught Sephiroth in the back. He – almost killed me but – I thought – I thought I'd killed him."

Cloud lowered his pale head into his hands, forgetting that one of Tifa's was still tangled with his and she leaned forward and let her fingers curve around his cool cheek.

"I don't – I don't remember it right," Cloud's voice was frustrated. "I can't – its all bits and pieces in my head. I thought I killed him."

"We need to call Yuffie," Tifa looked at Zack. "Cloud's adopted sister in Wutai."

Zack nodded but he leaned closer to Cloud.

"Hey." His voice was surprisingly soft and gentle and he laid a hand on Cloud's bowed shoulder. "What did Sephiroth find, Cloud? What made him go nuts?"

"It," Cloud's voice reflected repulsion in the way he bit the word out. "Jenova. Some – creature that had been buried in pure solidified Mako for centuries. Wutai had it. It had been a secret project between Shinra and Wutai until Wutai pulled the plug on it. It was the real reason Shinra attacked them. The Mako reactor is just to add insult to injury. That was its arm we fought, back on the dock. I don't know what it is. Just – it."

"It made Sephiroth go crazy?" Zack asked and Cloud finally raised his head and there was something in his blank eyes and the way he leveled them so calmly at Zack that made Tifa's heart suddenly stop and twist painfully in her chest.

"No. Sephiroth went crazy when he realized he was created from Jenova. That he was a part of that monster."