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Chapter 41: Speechless with Guilt

Thrumming within their cowlings, the glossair rings propelled the amalgam of science and beauty across the vast fields of Ivalice. The rings which rotated seventy-three times per minute had been through all manners of unpleasant circumstances, so too was the troubled pilot which steered it across the skies. His hands had decided the fate of him and the ship in many situations which demanded quick action and judgment. So much experience in those two hands, yet now there was much doubt.

Balthier, having been a pilot for almost thirteen years, was surprised when he realized that his hands were trembling, his palms drumming softly at the wheel's rim. His hands were sweaty too, it was all so strange. He had never been so…troubled. When he realized that he had veered off course for the nth time, he scowled at himself and leaned closer to the instrument console. The navigational tool showed that they would approach Ozmone in a few moments. He felt a little satisfied upon seeing that his ship was evidently more efficient than any airship, Bhujerban or Archadian, even though he was only running on two rings.

He looked up at the windshield and gazed attentively into the deep black of the night sky, whatever lay beyond escaped his vision. He squinted and then finally gave up. He did not really need to see what lay before him; sight was not a requisite during night time navigation, which was where the graphic maps came in. A smile crawled slowly across his lips, he was proud to be the pilot of the Strahl.

Then the memory of his troubles flooded back into his mind. Decisions he had made threatened to engulf far more than the darkness of the night outside his cockpit that he had to hiss to breathe in air. So much guilt weighing down on his conscience, he felt so crushed. His head hung down and then rested on the steering apparatus. There was a knotting pain, yet Balthier could not say where the pain was coming from, then there was a swelling rage, as though anyone nearest to him would have been tackled and assaulted without mercy. He felt like a helpless, wingless, pirate.

There was a light tap on his shoulder.

Balthier raised his head and turned about; it was Nono, Machinist extraordinaire. His pompom was swaying as he jumped up and down on the cockpit aisle.

'What do you need?' Balthier asked he surprised himself at how he was able to contain his seething rage; he expected that he would lash out at the little moogle with evident impatience.

Nono leaped on the navigator's seat and sat down. He then cocked his head and said in a little squeaky voice, 'the navigational system has not been calibrated, kupo. By my estimation we should be well past Ozmone by now and…'

Before Nono could squeak another word out of his little mouth, Balthier, whose eyes widened greatly upon hearing the calibration delay, quickly checked the navigation chart: forty-one minutes until they reach Ozmone. He swiveled his head towards Nono, and asked in a slightly aggravated voice, 'How certain are you?'

'I have been watching with the spotlight above the deck, Kupo. And I was able to sight the Dark crystals of Giza so I assumed that…' the squeaking became screaming, or frantic squeaking rather. Balthier bolted the ship around and sent the moogle flying to the right side of the cockpit; he was glued to the right window by the great magnitude of centrifugal force.

Shaking his head, Blathier righted the ship again, making it cruise straight forward with its prow pointing towards Ozmone. He heard Nono fall to the floor with a soft thump and a squeak. He shook his head again and made an impatient sound as he told himself not to let things escape his awareness ever again; he would not and could not let his foolish haunts obscure his required thoughts. It would be the end of him, the end of the ship and the four moogles who tended to it every day and the end of Fran, if he would allow things to go further.

He turned on the autopilot and got up. He looked at the navigator's seat where Nono had fallen, he failed to notice that that was where the little machinist was. He leaned over and helped Nono up.

Nono massaged his head and then ruffled his pompom, after which he caressed the furry ball until it became smooth. He then fixed his cap which was now askew and then dusted his clothes, as if there was any need for that.

Balthier apologized promptly and he was replied by excited squeaks which he could barely make out due to the moogle's sheer thrill. Amidst the happy squeaks he thought he heard 'wild flying' and 'no need to apologize' and there was even, he could have sworn, 'I wish to repeat that'. Balthier shrugged and then asked Nono to pilot the ship while he refreshed himself, Nono saluted and leaped onto the pilot's seat.

Balthier was halfway through the cockpit cabin, already being assaulted with disturbing thoughts, when he suddenly remembered…

'Fran!' He bounded into the deeper confines of the ship.

XOXOXOXO

In her dreams, Fran could only make out a distant figure, obscured by some copious haze. That distant form, to her venerable eyes it was a Viera. It was a Viera standing tall before a slender spire, surrounded by rows of seats of what, should her eyes be trusted, would seem to be a coliseum.

The haze paled and the Viera which stood before the spire turned around and faced Fran. Clad in red cloth and leather, her fair skin and her black hair imparted her revered name in one glance: Cljrn.

Her elegant stature and her lithely and slender build were towering over Fran, it seemed to her that she was shrinking constantly and then…

'Fran' Cljrn said blankly, the sky darkened and the haze returned. She could see nothing now, all around her was clouded in a dense fog of black, then the whole ground shook. The ground shook as crumbling pillars to the thunderous roar of a Wyrm.

'Fran!' Was it Cljrn who spoke, the call was more exigent yet the voice was deeper.

In her mind she could hear a thousand inculpating voices, and then all those accusations drowned by a soundless scream from her horrified mind. So the hold of a nightmare had replaced the sweet embrace of sleep.

XOXOXO

Balthier skidded to a halt in front of Fran's door, catching his breath as he leaned against the jamb. She was stirring, in her cot.

Reliefs washed over Balthier, thank the gods she had not fallen, he thought. He had passed by the moogles who were in complete disarray and panic. He could not care much for them, Fran was his only concern.

Fran should have been his only concern. There were others now which he was concerned with. He was depressed further by guilt and slowly allowed himself to slide, while leaning, down the jamb.

'Damn.' He whispered to himself. No one was to hear, he shouted: 'Damn!' and then he hung his head.

'What ails you?' A female voice asked soothingly. Balthier raised his hung head and met his partner's eyes.

Fran was looking at him inquisitively, as though she was inspecting some felled mammoth. She had awakened from her nightmare, so it seemed, her snow-white locks tumbled dramatically passed her shoulders and she looked almost vulnerable, without her heels and her headdress. Nevertheless, the steady gaze she gave him was unwavering. She leaned closer and cocked her head, 'I sense you are troubled.' She squatted in front of him and looked at him intently.

'Fran, 'he wanted to say something, share his haunting thoughts in hopes of being soothed by her wisdom and judgment. The words were lost and he continued his sentence, 'Do not worry about me. Worry about our future.' he said bleakly. The rain clouds of despair spiraled around him and made him miserable.

He felt so alone, so guilty.

Fran in a voice that was soft yet firm at the same time whispered with sudden gravity, 'No ailment, no curse and no misfortune shall befall us as long as we hold true to who we are, to each other.' She held her hand out.

Hazel brown met ruby red and Balthier felt a surge of comfort in that gaze. That look appeased his guilt, for a time and he took her hand, held it into his own, and for once, Balthier was speechless.

A/N: All right, THIS chapter was not written by me but my dear old brother...I thought maybe he should have a go at the Romance thread...hahaha...Read and Review please!! (And I'm starting to notice how more informal I get as the chapters go by!! Salute to the 40th chapter!!)