I don't own Twilight….again, damn. Or Ivars….double damn. I'm still on vacation, so please forgive me if the next update isn't till later this week.

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Alice POV

"Don't. You. Dare." I snarled at my husband. The feeling of calm that started to wash over me quickly vanished. He laid on the floor before me. I saw myself reflected in his eyes and I've got to say….I liked it. Nothing beats making your vampire husband cower in fear from his shorter, tiny vampire wife. Behind me I heard the bathroom door open and Edward sidle up behind me.

I knew they had gotten to Rosalie as soon as she leapt from the car as soon as we turned into the drive and took off at full speed. That glint in her eyes meant that she was in on the plot. Emmett had gotten to her and she was plotting with them. Whatever happened to us fashionistas sticking together? Oh well, I would have seen it if I wasn't so preoccupied with trying to reach my very foolish, very stubborn husband. This is what happens when I leave him alone with Emmett.

Why can't I SEE! What did Rosalie DO! I know it's her. Whatever caused the blind spots in my vision wasn't from Emmett and Jasper. Rosalie, with her infinite well of anger and vengeance on the other hand, could easily blindside me.

"Alice— " I raised a hand and Jasper fell instantly silent. I glowered down at him before falling into a crouch and placing one hand around his throat. With vampire speed and strength I lifted Jasper off the floor, holding him up in one hand as far as I could reach. Damn him….he's so tall. I couldn't raise my own husband off the floor with one hand when angry. Even with my strength. Damn long legs dragged against the gold carpet. His knees weren't even straight! Luckily Edward cheerfully assisted. Now with Jasper a full foot off the floor I stared up into his golden eyes.

"Why can't I see them?" I yelled.

Rosalie POV

I fled the car as soon as I hung up with Emmett and we had hit the drive. I took off, dialing as I headed towards the borderline. I can't believe I was doing this. But you know what, Edward liked those damn wolves so much, he can just deal with the rest of us playing with them.

As I ran the phone rang on the other end and a cheerful male voice answered.

"Hello?"



"Meet me at the borderline," I ordered. There was a stunned pause at the other end before he answered.

"Who is this?"

"Rosalie Hale. Look, I need—" I swallowed before I forced the words out, "Help with something. Just get there. And come as a human! No phasing!" I barked before hanging up. I continued to run through the green forest. Soon I picked up the scents of various dogs and I knew I was close. I stopped suddenly, arriving at my destination.

I hated working with the dogs. But it was the only way I knew to block Alice's visions. To get back at Edward for the past three weeks, it was worth it. Even if I had to work with a mutt.

I waited impatiently for that mongrel to arrive. Finally he reached the borderline. We were just behind the first line of trees off the road leading into La Push. Seth Clearwater had shot up since he started phasing. The smell coming off him was atrocious.

"Er….hi?" He said like a question. Seth was surprised and a bit wary that I had asked him to meet me. Good, he should be.

"Look, I haven't a lot of time, but I need your help." I had already devised my plan to get the mongrel to agree. The truth wasn't coming into play. I was going to LIE, and lie beautifully. "So we're planning a surprise for Edward. We can't have Alice know because….well if I get you involved then she can't see and Edward can't pluck the surprise from her mind. She's been careless with her thoughts as of late."

"Oh," Seth said, still confused as to why a vampire wants his help. But since the battle with the newborns, Seth had been more than willing to be friends with Edward and the family. He just wasn't prepared for me to come calling. "What kind of surprise?"

"For the wedding. It's more of a gift rather than a surprise." I smiled. A gift to the rest of us maybe. "Thus we need you. " I was getting irritated. The smell was truly foul. "Are you in or not?"

"Well…"Seth was contemplating. The wolves were on better terms, but still. The wedding was a sore spot because it signaled the end of Bella's life. But Seth liked us for some reason. Or at least Edward after they fought against that wild, red haired (and eyed) demon woman. "If it's a surprise for Edward and Bella, sure. What do I have to do?"

This was working better than I thought. I pulled my phone from my jacket pocket and called Emmett. I spoke low and fast, too fast for Seth to follow. I hung up and looked at Seth.

"Just wait for my call. Your involvement just sent Alice into a very blind, very uncomfortable spot." I handed over a small silver cell phone and reminded Seth no phasing till we were finished. I couldn't help but smile as I turned and headed back to my house.

Emmett's POV



"Excellent Babe," I hung up the phone and grinned at Bella. She eyed me warily.

"What is Excellent?" she asked.

I turned off I-5 and headed west through Seattle. "Alice won't be finding us anytime soon." I couldn't fight the laughter erupting from my chest. This was way better than I thought it could be.

A small look of panic crossed Bella's face before she smoothed out the furrows in her forehead. "And why is that?" Oh-ho, someone was betting on Alice.

"Because of my beautiful, smart Rosalie, Alice's visions of us have become off limits. " Bella frowned, and then a look of understanding flashed through her eyes. "EMMETT! WHO?" she yelled at me.

"Uh-uh. I'm not telling you." I couldn't stop the grin that was permanently plastered on my face. This was too good. "So, what do you want to do, Bella?" The point was to keep Bella away from Edward, not to torture Bella…well, torture her anymore than we already were.

"Oh, I get a say in this mess, do I?" she spat. We were stopped at a red light in downtown Seattle. The windows were down and I could smell the salt off the sound. We were near the Waterfront. On Bella's side of the car was a large truck with two guys staring through the open passenger window. Bella didn't give them a second glance as she sat fuming. She kept her eyes forward and her martyred expression in place.

"Hey baby, if your not happy with him—" my laughter cut off whatever else the human driver was saying. They were hitting on Bella. Her face turned a deep, strawberry shade. I couldn't breath from how hard I was laughing. If I could cry I would. The driver's face changed from confident to confused to upset. Bella slid down in her seat as far as she could. The guy's buddy laughed as hard as I did. He didn't like this. He started revving his engine and I grinned. Thank God Rosalie loved me and engines.

The light turned green and we were off. They hadn't even left the light before we turned right onto the Waterfront. Nothing could beat my Jeep. Bella clutched her harness straps as she slid around in her seat. Her eyes were wide and she stared at me.

"What was that?!" she half yelled.

"Just a race. Showing the humans who's the boss." Bella just stared at me. "Come on," I said, grinning. "You've got to admit that was fun. Especially with them hitting on you like that."

Bella didn't say anything. However, her left cheek lifted slightly.

That's when I heard it.

It was a low growl. I turned to Bella, but she just looked at me bewildered.

"What?" she asked as I stared at her.



"Why did you growl at me? I mean, it was pretty funny." That's when I heard the growl again. It was definitely coming from Bella. She had heard it this time and her face turned an even deeper shade of red.

"How did you do that?" I asked. It was like the low rumble of thunder off in the distance.

"Emmett," she whispered in a plea. "I didn't do anything." The third rumble had me staring at her. She rubbed her stomach and realization dawned on me.

"Oh, you're hungry." I couldn't help but laugh again. Humans were so funny. Bella just glanced at me, slightly embarrassed.

"Yes, you dragged me off before lunch and I didn't eat breakfast." She said quietly.

I turned into a parking lot across from a seafood place. Feeding the human was a part of stealing the human. We crossed the street and Bella ordered clam chowder from Ivars and we sat by the waterfront as she ate. That's when inspiration hit me.

Humans are fragile.

Humans are weak.

And in this case, Humans need protecting.

What better place to protect a human than a Fort.

I grinned wide. Wider than I should have. A nearby Seagull (damn rats with wings) fell off its perch on the railing in its battle to escape. A small child starred from across the deck with wide eyes, frozen with fear. Bella looked up at me and immediately grimaced.

"Emmett…" she trailed off, knowing she wasn't going to like what came next.

"Oh Bella…" I grinned wickedly. This was going to be great.

A/N- Ok, if any of you are from Washington, or are familiar with Washington, then you might be able to guess which Fort Emmett is thinking of taking Bella. Oh, and one word….paintballs….muahahahah.

So review and discuss…..and review….PREASE!! If you review, you will get a free wish from the deranged pixie….not Alice, I mean the other deranged pixie….short, blonde, hang's a kid named Pan. If you don't review, then the other deranged pixie will give you a makeover in your sleep…before letting the Vile Mike Newton have his way with you and then sending photographic evidence to Jessica Stanley. Then, well….I can't help you once she starts hunting. She's a lot like James in that respect. So review, and you won't be bothered with Mike-Schmike and Jessica won't try to rip your eyes from your head. Cheers till next time!



Things I learned about the south from my sister in Florida.

She's been called a yankee ten times (in one week).

All the oranges are from south Africa.

Everyone likes to drink.

Everyone drives fast.

Half the women are pregnant.