WHAT ESSAYS SHOULD I BE WRITING RIGHT NOW INSTEAD OF DOING THIS

WHY, ONE ON THE CHRISTIANISATION OF CELTIC GODS AND ANOTHER FOR MY DUMB PHILOSOPHY CLASS THAT MAKES ME ANGRY WHENEVER I THINK OF IT. OOPS.

I'm nursing a kidney infection and I watched an illegal video of Hamilton last week (the kidney infection is probably my karmatic debt being paid off probably... I promise that one day I'll see it legitimately and Hamilton will get all my money).

BYE. ENJOY.

Disclaimer: I don't own the PJOverse, but you guys know that.

Dedication: All of you because your reviews literally make my life so much better. Since I have such limited time, I usually write for you instead of replying to your adorable and kind and thoughtful reviews- but know that I get giddy when I get email notifications and when I have a bad day, I reread them... *nerd*


xv : sunflowers

"You look blue, baby girl," Will said holding his arms out. Cata drifted towards him and sat on his knee, head on his shoulder.

"Tired," she said.

"Just tired?" Will asked. "I hate to break it to you, but you're only on your third day of school."

Catalina smiled. "I miss camp. I know that sounds shitty cause we have a good deal around here, but I do."

"That's alright," Will said. "I missed camp too when I left for college. You're allowed to have two homes."

"Yeah," Cata said. "Also something else."

"What else, Cats?"

"I… I started seeing someone this summer," she said.

"Really?" Will said. "Who? Who is this?"

"Her name's Michaëlle," Cata said. "Michaëlle Pereira Matos. She's from Montreal, daughter of Hermes. She's a sweetheart Dad. An absolute dork- she figured out how to get her comics delivered to camp while bypassing the harpies because they open up the envelopes and apparently damage them. Scruff the corners, dog-ear the pages, that kind of thing. I got in her good books by replacing a Ms. Marvel graphic novel that the harpies singed with volcanic dishwater."

"Nice," Will said. "Is she your age?"

And that was all Cata needed to hear before launching into Michaëlle Pereira Matos' life story. She tye-died her orange camp t-shirts and ate pudding and soft foods like a baby and her shoelaces glowed in the dark and she could speak French, Portuguse, Créole, Italian and Spanish. Her favourite food was empanadas and her favourite method of transportation was subway, which was why their first date had been a picnic on the New York subway followed by watching a movie on a brother's borrowed iPhone while on the subway. Will wasn't sure if that was charming or disappointing- but he didn't have time to think about it because Michaëlle's favourite Jolly Rancher flavour was watermelon, she was the undefeated Oreo Lick Race Champion of camp, her favourite food was caldo verde, she loved sunglasses and sunflowers and chewing sunflower seeds and the colour yellow and she drew legendary chalk drawings all over camp and make kites from scratch…

Yes, Catalina conveyed all this information (and more) with very little breathing.

"Have you talked to her since camp?" Will asked.

"Oh yeah," Catalina said. "Absolutely."

"And if you two stay in touch, would you want to go back to camp over Thanksgiving weekend?" Will said.

Cata's eyes brightened.


Will crawled into bed, rolled onto his right side and slung an arm over Nico who made an I-was-sleeping groan of protest, but then curled up to Will.

"Nico?"

"No."

"It's about a kid."

"Mmm?"

"I've figured out why the drachma jar is so empty," he said smiling. "It's pretty good."


Cata was giddy in the car. It was good that Nico was driving, because Will would have been just as bad.

"I should call Danny," Cata said. "So he can double-check to make sure the flight's not delayed."

"It was fine fifteen minutes ago Cata, if something's wrong we'll find out at the airport," Nico said.

"Do you think something went wrong?" Catalina asked eagerly.

"No I do not," Nico said. "Her father's the god of transport. I think she'll be fine."

"Kay," Catalina said. She was chewing on a fingernail and the tips of her dreadlocks were flickering between silver and gold nervously. She'd gotten all dressed up in a black cardigan and her untorn jeans and favourite boots too. She was wearing a coat over that, so Nico wasn't sure why- but clearly his role at the moment was to calm her down.

« You don't have to be so nervous, tresoro," Nico said. "She's met most of your siblings before. I think your dads are pretty cool. She's going to be super comfortable bunking upstairs with you and Francesca…"

Francesca being what Nico liked to think of as "birth control".

"I know," Cata said. She smiled brightly. "I'm just excited to see her again."

Cata not being one to tell a story twice, not even the best ones, Nico had only heard of Micah- from Will and Daniel, mostly (Daniel, good brother that he was, being more than happy to spill all of the most embarrassing stories he had on his sister and her girlfriend).

Somehow, all the scraps that Nico had heard about this girl all came together when he stuffed his hands in his pockets and stood aside, watching Cata laugh into Michaëlle's hair at the airport. He couldn't help it, it was a habit he'd anchored quite profoundly- he picked this new girl apart. Curls the colour of cocoa powder. She looked disproportioned and dainty, something of a fairy. Her lips were full and dramatic Egyptian blue eyes. The telltale pointy ears and upturned nose of a child of Hermes were easy to spot from afar, as Cata held her hand and brought Michaëlle forward shyly.

"Micah," Catalina said. "This is my father, Nico di Angelo. Papa, this is…"

"Michaëlle, pleasure to meet you," Nico said extending a hand.

"Pleasure is mine," she smiled shaking his hand. Nico had read books and he'd seen movies so he knew that he should be saying something like 'wow, strong handshake'. Will probably would. But as stupid as it sounded, it was when Michaëlle shaked his hand knowing fully well who he was but smiling as if she was excited to meet her girlfriend's dad instead of an obscure and mysterious war hero… That's when he decided he liked and trusted her.


He was braiding Teresa's hair for bedtime when he heard the girls laughing upstairs- Franca, Cata and Michaëlle in the attic. He put off checking up on them for a while, trying to act slick. When he did go up, he smiled at the yellow paper flowers hanging from the ceiling and pasted to the walls. Yellow sunflowers. Michaëlle's favourite.

Franca spotted him. Nico cleared his throat.

"Do you guys all have enough blankets?" Nico asked.

"Yes Papa," Cata said. "Dad just came to check."

Damn it Will, what a snoop.

"Perfect," Nico said. "Shout if you need anything."

"What if Dad said to give him a shout?" Cata asked.

Okay, he was a snoop too.


"Good morning Michaëlle," Nico said. He was standing at the grill, still wearing sweatpants, getting a head start on crêpes. Franca was chopping strawberries with him- they were all tiny and perfectly rounded, berries she'd brought back from camp and had had Nico freeze.

"Good morning M. di Angelo," she said. "Hi Franca."

"Do you drink coffee?" Nico asked. "There's a full pot on the counter, mugs up there."

"Thank you," Michaëlle said. "Any mug?"

"Any mug," Nico confirmed. When he heard the fridge open and close and turned around, he saw Mica working on two cups. She turned around, holding both, and bit her lip.

"Cata's awake," Michaëlle said. She raised one mug. "I figured you had coconut milk in the fridge… that's how she takes it."

"Oh yeah, help yourself," Will said.

"A cup of coffee, half a cup of coconut milk and a teaspoon of sugar," Nico said approvingly.

He heard Will exchange greetings with Michaëlle on her way up. Nico looked over his shoulder to Will.

"A cup of coffee, half a cup of coconut milk and a teaspoon of sugar," he said nodding his head towards Micah.

"She knows?" Will asked. "Good sign."

"They got in trouble at camp all the time for eating together," Francesca said.

"You lot shouldn't get into trouble at camp," Will said.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Nico scoffed. Will grinned. The doctor's note they'd used at camp was framed and hanging above their bed.

He laced his arms around Nico's waist and settled his chin on Nico's shoulder. "How do I take my coffee, Nico?"

"We've been married eighteen years, make it yourself," Nico said. He craned his neck and kissed Will's nose. "Two creams, two sugar."

"We are in love!" Will smiled.

"Ewe," Franca said.


Because Emilia woke up extremely early and started screaming (fun little habits), they took turns waking her up, changing her and finding something fun for her to do. Today it was Will's turn-

And the crib was empty.

All the bedroom doors were closed. Emilia didn't quite have the fine motor skills to tackle stairs yet, but Will still decided to go ahead and look downstairs before waking up Nico. That was when he saw the basement door, hanging just a tiny bit open, and heard some noise. He wasn't sure if he should be armed for this, but he went downstairs to check it out.

The floor was carpeted with toys and Legos and what seemed to be half of Daniel's wardrobe (?). The walls were plastered with pictures and paper crafts, but a wall they'd covered in blackboard paint was now completely covered in pictures. Thankfully, Emilia was there, adding loopy flowers and abstract rabbits. And there was Michaëlle, in a Camp t-shirt and rainbow striped pyjamas, her hair up in a hasty bun, passing chalk to Emilia and adding beautiful mandalas to the wall herself.

"Good morning," Will said, figuring he shouldn't spook her. Michaëlle still jumped. Emilia babbled something that was probably meant to be 'Daddy!' and bounced to her feet and ran his way. He scooped her up and blew a raspberry on her cheek, which made her laugh.

"Hi," Michaëlle said. "Good morning. Sorry, I was getting a drink of water and she was already awake."

"No worries," Will said. "Thanks for taking her. I just have to go…"

"I changed her too," Michaëlle said.

"Oh wow," Will said. "Thank you."

He put Emilia down and she took one brave step before hitting the ground again and crawling back to the wall. Will sat down with them.

"That's beautiful, Michaëlle," Will said. "I'd been warned you were an artist."

"Thanks," she smiled.

"Thanks again for taking care of Emy. Don't feel obliged."

"No, not at all," Michaëlle said. "I spent a year in foster care before coming to camp, I miss taking care of the other kids."

"Yeah?" Will asked. "I missed that when I left camp… drove Nico crazy telling him to remember to eat and pick up his stuff. Who's your counsellor in Cabin 11?"

"Joseph Mateba," Michaëlle said. "He's from New England."

"He's dating the Cabin 7 counsellor, isn't she?" Will recalled.

"Right," Michaëlle said. "He and Jordan are cute. How do you...?"

"Son of Apollo," Will said. "I went to give a talk on transitioning into medical school last semester. I keep up."

"Right," Michaëlle said. "Sorry, I forget. Cata being a daughter of Hecate and all... Did you hear about the latest raid on Cabin 7, last time the Hunters of Artemis swung by?"

"No," Will said reaching out and grabbing Emilia around the waist to plop her down on his knee. "Tell me."

And so Michaëlle did, and when they finally made their way upstairs Nico already had breakfast going and everybody was up and marathoning the Elf movies. Michaëlle carried Emy over to Nico and then to Franca, and perched on Cata's knee.

Will dallied in the kitchen.

"Step away from the plate of pancakes," Nico said.

"I wasn't going to steal one," Will lied.

"What was that about?" Nico asked, nodding his head towards the basement door. Will smiled.

"Cata did well," he said simply.


When Nico got up in the middle of the night, he crept downstairs to go check on the Christmas tree. Teresa sometimes tried to set up booby traps to catch Santa Claus.

The TV was glowing blue, which confused Nico for a second and quickened his step until he saw Cata and Michaëlle on the couch, cocooned in a thick layer of blankets. They must have fallen asleep and let the DVD run to its end. Micha slept with her mouth open and Cata's glasses were lopsided over her face.

Nico just turned the TV off, let them be, and went back to sleep. His Christmas present to them.


The doorbell rang.

"Who is that?" Daniel asked, mouth full of cereal. Milk trickled back into the bowl.

"Ewe," Tessa said.

"Mouth closed at the table," Will said. He was helping Emmy eat. "For that, you get to go check."

He came back holding a sunshine-yellow balloon.

"Where's Cata?" he asked.

"Who was there?" Nico asked, his fingers knotted into Tessa's hair as he wrestled her thick hair into braids.

"Nobody," Daniel said. "Cata!"

"Why are you even screaming this early?" Cata groaned, coming down the stairs. Her hair was still in its sleeping bun, but at least she was wearing jean capris, a white shirt and a black-and-white kimono kind of cardigan sort of… Nico didn't know much about Cata's clothes. Whatever, she was dressed which was good.

"Because people are ringing the doorbell super early for you, but it's not people," Daniel said.

"What," Cata said.

"Look, I'm tired, just take this balloon, I think it's here for you," Daniel said.

That's when Cata seemed to notice it and she smiled.

"Cata, what's that?" Will asked.

Tessa sighed. "Duh Dad. It's from her girlfriend."

"Oh shut up you," Cata said, taking the balloon from Daniel and bringing it back upstairs.

"You wouldn't tell me to shut up all the time if I wasn't right," Tessa shouted back at her.

"Settle down or you'll have bumps," Nico told her.


Nico hated snail mail, mostly because it was 70% bills, 6% Christmas or Birthday cards from distant Solace relatives he was still on the fence about twenty years into his marriage, 10% advertising for things he didn't want to spend money on or had already spent money on, and… yeah, another 10% bills for sure.

But lately it was worth going through because the other 4% were cards from Michaëlle who, as a daughter of Hermes, took mail very seriously and decorated each and every envelope beautifully. Maybe there would be paper airplanes zooming across the envelope, or rainbows darting from one corner to another, or mandalas inked onto the back… You never knew with Micah.

"She has to mail these every few days for there to be so many," Teresa said as she brought Cata's mail back to her. "Your correspondence can't possibly be maintaining a conversation."

"It's not," Cata said. "Sometimes it's literally just a knock-knock joke or a fortune from a cookie or a quarter she found in the woods."

"Aww," Franca fawned.

"What's the point?" Tessa said.

"There doesn't need to be a point, Tessa," Will said.

"Like when you bring flowers home for Papa even if he doesn't care that much about flowers and just puts them in a vase to die?" Teresa asked.

"Exactly like that," Nico said. "It just means someone you love is thinking about you because they love you."

"Well why else would someone who loves you be thinking about you," Teresa said. "It doesn't mean anything."

"Don't be so clinical," Cata said. "It doesn't all have to make sense."

The idea seemed to genuinely puzzle Teresa, but Cata smiled as she scanned through Michaëlle's letter.


When they dropped off Cata and Danny and Franca at Camp this year, they weren't even subtle. Someone called Micah as soon as they arrived at the borders, and Cata was trapped in a hug as soon as she reached the bottom of Half-Blood Hill. She kissed Micah right there and right then.

"Ewe," Emilia said.

"Yeah, you keep thinking that," Will said. "Keep Dad young, Emmy."


"I didn't think Mr D actually sent letters to parents when campers misbehaved," Will said stunned.

"We got a letter about our demigod children misbehaving?" Nico said. "What are we supposed to do about that? They're at Camp. Should we be pulling out our resumes to show them how well we did?"

Will grinned and kissed Nico's head before sitting down on his desk and opening the envelope.

"Which kid is it, let's start with that," Nico sighed.

"Catalina," Will said.

"That's promising," Nico said. "What did she do, turn a child of Ares into a pig? She'd been talking about it."

"She was caught out of bed with… ah, another camper. Ooh. Okay. Thanks M D, didn't need to know that much… Okay, long story short babe, Micah was there too and about five rules very near and dear to Chiron's heart ended up being shattered."

Nico took the letter.

"Even for the great god Dionysus, it seems shallow to specify that he's being incredibly detailed here as a revenge for all our sneaking around while 'Misters Wilbur and Nicholas were at camp themselves'," Nico said.

"It seems shallow to call me Wilbur," Will said. "Also hurtful in its inaccuracy."

"The most inaccurate thing here is that we didn't need to sneak around," Nico said. "We basically had our own cabin."

"Yes, we should suggest that to Cata," Will said. "Definitely. You do that while I send her sexual health pamphlets and condom samples I can steal from the hospital, that should be adequate."

"Don't be petty Will."

"I'm not being petty, I'm being informative."

"William James Solace," Nico said.

"What," Will said. "Don't you think it's better for her to be informed and safe than...?"

"Oh, relax," Nico said. "I put a pack of condoms in her trunk before shipping her off to camp, she'll be fine."

"You did what?" Will asked.

"Read into the future, by the looks of it," Nico said. "Which makes the super weird look the lady at the pharmacy gave me for buying female condoms worth it. Our usual cashier thinks I'm having an affair, I think, she hasn't been quite so nice to me lately. Could you maybe clear things up with her next time you go pick up Emilia's meds?"

He was about to scrunch up the letter but then he looked over it again. "Think we should frame this and hang it over Cata's bed for when she comes back?"

"I definitely do," Will said.


"The water bill's doubled and Franca's going to need the shower after volleyball," Will said. "Wrap it up, okay Cata?"

Cata didn't answer him, but laughed at something that Michaëlle said over IM. Will sighed.

"The house is on fire Cata, if you don't come out right now you're going to burn," Teresa volunteered.

"Tessa," Will hissed.

"She isn't going to react anyways," Teresa shrugged.

"That's not… that's not usually the point," Will sighed. "Why don't you run downstairs and turn the water off?"

The bathroom door opened up a little. Cata stuck her head out. "Do you mind? Micah and I can barely hear each other."


Michaëlle came down as a surprise in February, for Cata's sweet sixteen. She sat on Cata's left, Franca was on the right. Mortal friends were also crowding the kitchen while Cata cut into her tiramisu, icing smeared on her nose and the lense of her glasses thanks to Micah.

Cata was so happy that the tips of her dreadlocks were turning pink and gold, thankfully they were tucked into a bun and a bit harder to see. This entire day had everything Cata possibly needed to be happy. She and her mortal friends from robotics club and the theater group had gone skating on Frog Pond. When she'd come back, all of them with snowflakes in their hair, Michaëlle had been in the kitchen in a daisy-spotted skirt helping Will make hot chocolate. Catalina had been fed gnocci and her favourite cake out of Nico's arsenal of baked goods, all her friends were in love with Micah and Micah was in love with them all, and now they were going to go open presents and watch a bunch of movies in which things blew up or terrifying special effect make-up turned ordinary actors into horribly monsters. And from what Nico knew, she was getting a fancy new laptop for school and robotics and movie editing, a fancy Chinese kite that would be a lot of fun to both fly and magically manipulate at camp according to Michaëlle (who, for all they knew, had actually gone to China to get it), and some new tools her techie friends had pitched together to buy for her. This day was only going to get better. Also it was still snowing.

Conversation was lively, so lively that Emilia came to hide in the kitchen with her dads. She'd been a little mad not to have been warned that Micah was coming, but they'd both learned not to trust six year old children with secrets by now. An extra scoop of ice cream had brought Nico back in her good books. Will still had to work on it.

"I like Michaëlle," Emilia said.

"We like her too, baby girl," Will said.

"I'm glad she's my new sister," she said eating some cake.

Oh boy. This was going to be a hard one to explain. Nico and Will crossed gazes over her little blond head and Nico shrugged.

"Yeah, she's a good sister to have," he said, tucking Emilia's hair back. She was six years old. Let her dream.


"I'm so glad you came, but I wish you could stay," Cata said, holding Michaëlle against her.

"Me too," she said. "But you have school and if I don't hitch a ride with Argus now, who knows how I'll get back to camp."

"We could make it into an adventure," Cata smiled. She kissed Michaëlle. "You know, it's about time we had another good one…"

Michaëlle smiled against her lips. "We will when you come back. The second June comes along, just you wait. We'll fly kites and I'll show you how big the sunflowers are getting and you will not believe what my cabin has planned for this summer."

"I don't think I would no," Cata said.

"Bring your own marshmallows to camp, okay?" Micah confided. "But shh. If you let word get around, I might have to break up with you."

"My lips are sealed, then," Cata said.

"Not to me I hope," Michaëlle said before kissing her again. By that point, Argus was honking rather loudly for Micah to come out. The daughter of Hermes smiled, squeezed Cata's hand, and ran out the door, hair swinging.


"Cata, isn't that the scarf Micah had on when she was here?" Will asked, ladling a spoonful of minestrone soup into a fourth bowl in preparation for the small army of children who would then come tearing in for supper.

"Yes," Teresa said.

"Tessa," Catalina said elbowing her. But she was smiling too. "Yes."

"You stole her clothes," Will said. "Nice. Best part of being in a relationship."

"Other than, you know, having someone always standing by your side and raising your kids with you or when you spend seventeen hours in a row operating on a baby with a brain tumour and folding laundry and making soup," Daniel said.

Nico held out his hand for a high-five.

"She's going to want it back," Teresa said.

"Nah," Daniel said. "It's a sacrifice you make."

"If I ever get a girlfriend or a boyfriend tell them that I'll dump them if they touch my stuff," Teresa said.

"We'll put up posters around school and camp," Cata said. "Don't you worry."

She grabbed a bowl and went back to the living room, where a Harry Potter marathon was making the day go by.

"You guys wouldn't think kleptomania was so cute if you knew about the drawer of stuff she's been accumulating," Francesca said, grabbing a bowl and heading out to the living room herself.


The front door burst open and Daniel ran inside.

"Cata?" he called. "Cata? Catalina!"

"Daniel, what's wrong?" Nico asked. He got up from his desk and opened the door to his office. Daniel met him there, breathless and pale.

"Danny?"

"Where's Cata?" he asked.

"She's helping Francesca with her garden," Nico said. They were doing peas and cucumbers and zucchinis today. "Danny, what's wrong?"

He took off before he even answered, crossing the house and sliding the porch door open, not even bothering to close it behind him. Nico followed him, making his way to the back door and looking out into the backyard. Francesca and Cata were kneeling in the dirt by the fence, near the vegetable patch that Franca had been tending since she was three. Danny was kneeling by her, holding her hands. Nico frowned, trying to make out what he was saying. Then Cata just screamed.

Nico pushed the door open and stepped outside, but her siblings had her. It was as if a puppeteer had snipped two strings, one between Cata's shoulder blades and another on her head. She just sagged against Franca, who helped her straighten herself up. Danny pushed himself back up difficultly, and then he gave Cata a hand. She took it, trembling, and let her brother and sister steer her back into the house.

Nico let them pass, but he took Daniel's arm to hold him back a second.

"What's wrong?" Nico asked. "Who…"

"Michaëlle," Danny said. Nico's stomach clenched. "She's gone. Antwan called me. She went into the city to help a half-blood who'd gotten lost, who was stuck in a psych ward. They say it was a Mormolykeia, but it's hard to tell because Micah slashed her Pegasus' reins and let her go, so they don't know where she was attacked. Only that they found her in the Hudson."

"Mormolykeia," Nico said. He'd heart that name; the latest monster craze in New York City. Percy had warned him ages ago. "Underworld daemons. Attendants to…"

Hecate.

Oh no.

"Danny, go catch Emilia at the bus stop; take her and Tessa to… I don't care, anywhere for a few hours."

"But Cata-"

"Franca and I have got her," Nico said. "I need you to grab your little sisters- and I know they're all your little sisters, but I also know that you know what I mean."

"Okay," Daniel said. "Okay."

He took a deep breath and wiped at his eyes. Nico heard Cata start to cry in the living room.

He hugged Danny quickly and then turned to the living room to… to…

He had no idea.


It was the first night they'd slept in their own bed, and that was only because Cata was in New York for the funeral rites. No need to sit at her bedside for when she woke up, or stay up all night in the living room watching old movies to pass the time tonight. Daniel and Franca had played rock-paper-scissors to figure out who would be going to New York with her- during the school year they tried to limit the amount of dissapearing Solace children to two. Danny had ultimately been the one to go, and he and Antwan were calling in frequently enough. Nico could only hope that the other children of Hecate would close ranks around her.

Nico hadn't thought he'd sleep much, but he must have dozed off for a few seconds because he woke up and Will's hand was knotted in the front of Nico's shirt in a death grip that Nico wouldn't even be able to begin untangling himself from.

In that particular second it felt okay, because he didn't want to.


"Eating is important," Francesca said. Nico wanted to tell her to stop, to leave her sister alone. For a child of the Underworld, it was incredibly how much light Franca had in her. How nurturing she could be. How untouched she was by all the death and destruction and darkness and nihilism that Nico had had to swallow when he was much younger than she was. It could also be exasperating.

"I'm not hungry Franca, thank you," Cata said quietly. She was dressed for school today, but she looked so clammy Nico had half a mind to keep her home.

"I put brown sugar in your oatmeal like you love it," Francesca said. "Brown sugar and apples- cut in chunks not slices, with cinnamon and…"

"For fuck's sake Franca, I said I'm not hungry," Cata snapped. She paled the second the words left her mouth. The outburst was so loud and so uncanny that not even Emilia said anything about hearing the word-she'd-recently-learned-was-bad.

"Franca, I'm so sorry," Cata whispered.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen," Franca said. "I'm sorry for… for everything, Cata. I really am."

And so Cata started crying into her breakfast and she didn't go back to school quite that day either.


Cata was laying down in the middle of the backyard. Will went out to check on her after an hour of this, and he lay down next to her. Then he saw something red floating in the sky- something strangely shaped, with red streamers billowing behind it… It was getting further and further away as it gained altitude, but Will recognised the shape of a phoenix.

"Is that your kite?" Will asked. "The Chinese kite you had hanging over your door?"

"I was saving it for this summer," Cata said. "But it's just April now. If we're not going to get to fly it together, then I don't want to fly it at all."

"Okay," Will said. He starred at the kite spiralling away with her.

"You know how they say that the more time you give it, the more space grief gives you to live?" Cata asked.

Had she been reading books on this?

"Yes," Will said.

"I feel claustrophobic right now," Cata said.

By the time she looked up from Will's chest, where his shirt was now soaked, the spot of red in the sky was gone.


"Cata, I'm not rushing you," Nico said. "You know that. But not eating isn't healthy and that's where the line is drawn."

Thirteen take-out menus were spread on the table in front of Cata.

"Pick anything," Nico said. "Absolutely anything. Even if it's not here, we can go drive to pick something up Cata."

"Did I tell you what our school play is this year, Papa?" Cata asked.

"No," Nico said navigating the change of subject cautiously.

"It's Romeo and Juliet," Cata said. "And I don't care if they aren't really in love or if Shakespeare is making fun of them. It's senseless."

"The violence?" Nico asked. "Absolutely."

"I'm not hungry."


"What are you working on?" Nico asked Cata. "It's late, tresoro."

"A video for the play," Cata said. "It won't be long."

She shut a tab and that's when Nico spotted the background on her Mac; a field full of sunflowers.


"Franca, what are you doing?" Catalina said.

"I'm calling a slumber party," she said. "Remember how Dads nearly made us stop sharing a room when you were eight because we had slumber parties too often?"

"Yeah," Cata said, still sounding unsure.

"Okay, well, I was really upset when they said that and I was crying pretty hard, and so we made a deal. You and I needed to stop calling sleepover and we could still do it in emergencies. So if you were really sick but not throwing up, if you and I hadn't seen each other in three days and at least two nights, or if you were sad and I was worried. And now I'm worried, so I'm calling slumber party. It's kind of too late to get Little Princess or Secret Garden started, but I think I have popcorn under my bed and I definitely can and will snuggle up with you too."

Cata relaxed against Francesca.


"I feel like a horrible father," Will said.

Nico turned onto his side, shifting the blankets and pillows and the entire structure of their bed as he did so. "What are you talking about?"

"I feel like a horrible father," Will repeated. "My daughter's grieving. That's my baby, that's the first baby I was in charge of taking care of. And she's hurting so badly, she's sleepless unless someone spends the night holding her, and she hasn't eaten right in two weeks and she doesn't like going outside or doing anything and I don't know what to tell her. Because if I lost you I would be losing myself exactly like she is, maybe worst, and I wouldn't know what to do. I wouldn't want to be told what to do, I'd just want to scream."

Nico pushed himself up and rested against Will's chest, his ear against the best place to hear Will's heart. He knew that spot by heart now. Mostly for himself. The steady thump thump was the best thing Nico could ever time his breathing to.

"We can't protect our kids from everything," Nico said. "We can't… we can't always break the ice for them. They're demigods like we were. Like hundreds of other kids are. This is bigger than us."

"I know," Will said. "I just don't want it to be. I shouldn't have become a surgeon. It gave me such illusions about being able to fix anything."

Nico closed his eyes. Thump thump. Thump thump.

"Will?"

"Nico."

"I'd be worst than Cata," Nico said quietly. "So I promise to you that if anything ever happens to you, I won't be a flight risk. I won't disassociate, I won't try anything crazy, I won't bargain with my father. I'll stay here. I'll do my best with our kids. I'll keep feeding them and watering the plants and I'll go through the paperwork. Because if I don't promise that to you, I don't know if I'd be strong enough to do it."

"You would. I trust you. But because I don't trust myself, I promise if something happens to you, I'm going to twice the dad I am now to make up for you," Will added quietly. "I promise that too, Nico. But I never want to go through what our baby's going through, Nico. I don't ever want to lose you."

"I know we've already made these promises, you know, when Cata came to us- but I need to say it again. I think... I'm used to us, Will. I think I started forgetting, because we've finally gotten a break and things are lining up and we have a good thing going on here. But I never want to lose you either," Nico said.

Nico buried his face against Will's chest. Thump thump thump. Thump thump thump.

Will's fingers closed around Nico's wrist. Two of them pushed against the vein running towards his hands. A doctor reading a pulse.

Thump thump thump. Thump thump thump. Thump thump thump.


It took a month for the first smile to come back. Of course, Danny was behind it- he was nearly hyperventilating when he told Nico and Will the story of being called out for parking in a handicapped spot at the grocery store and unfastening his prosthetic leg to make a soccer mom scream. He tried to mention Cata's smile as if it wasn't a big deal, as if he'd expected it from the get-go. But they all knew. They were all hyperaware of it as they put the groceries away.

"Good thing I was wearing shorts," he said. "Would've gotten all tangled up if not."

Cata laughed again.

Nico and Will looked at each other.

It didn't mean much, but it meant at least something was happening in there.