Bella.
I was depressed.
Staring into the mirror that hung from a nail on my wall, I ran my hands along the sides of the dark blue, silk dress I was planning on wearing to dinner tonight, and smoothed it out. I stared at my refection for a while, pondering whether or not the low-cut trims on the dress revealed too much of both chest and legs, and shrugged nonchalantly. It wasn't as if I had much chest to show, anyway.
Frowning, I reeled my eyes away from my slim figure and focused on my make-up and hair. They looked decent enough. Glancing down, I twisted my ankles to get a better view of the heels that matched perfectly with the dress. Of course, both the dress and the heels had been given to me by Alice during one of the many shopping sprees I had endured for her throughout the years.
I didn't like dressing up on days that I did not have to work. Even so, I made an appreciative attempt to look my best. If I didn't, I would only have to suffer for it later. I shivered at the image of Alice dragging me back to her house to change clothes. I was nothing more than a Barbie doll in her eyes. She, of course, didn't care that I knew it, either.
Sighing, I grabbed my small, silver purse from on top of my bed and hastily tried to stuff all my carry-on cosmetics and necessities in. That proved to be more difficult, than necessary.
I was half-way through the door when I remembered the person who would be accompanying me today.
That forced another sigh from me.
I turned on my heels and grabbed a packet of Aspirin from the cupboard in my kitchen. If I was going to survive the night with that bastard, I was desperately going to need some pain-killers. Drugs worked wonders in head-throbbing situations. It was only a shame that I ran out of the Tylenol PM, that usually knocked me out. I regretted going through the bottle so quickly after that first week Cullen was assigned to me.
While I was making my way to the silver car parked just across the street from my apartment, I forced myself not to turn back and get another packet of meds, reminding myself that I wasn't a junkie.
"At least I didn't have to worry about people seeing me dressed like this",
I thought to myself, optimistically. The neighborhood I lived in was a peaceful, quiet area. You saw people walking their dogs early in the morning, and heading out to work. That was about it, really. It suited me just fine. Because of my job, it was expected that I wore name-brand items and expensive clothing. Even so, I kept my daily ensembles fashionable and simple.
Once inside the car, I turned the heater on even before strapping on my seatbelt. Though the weather man had so buoyantly stated that the temperature would reach a reassuring temp of 65 degrees, a blessing for the crisp, sunless month of October, I was still cold. Staring down at the incredibly thin fabric that covered my body, I mentally cursed myself for not bringing a sweater.
I pulled out of the parking slot carefully, an over-cautious act seeing as there were no cars, nor people, anywhere near me, and picked up the pace when I reached the first corner of the block.
I was really depressed.
After Edward had left my office yesterday, I received a dejecting phone call from the one person who I had been anxiously waiting to call me: Jacob.
We had a pretty normal conversation, aside from the fact that my stomach had been completely overwhelmed with butterflies and other tingly things.
Jacob had been busy, lately. Since the time he received news of his fathers sudden charge to a hospital after collapsing, and with his new La Vogues' modeling contract, Jacob had been running back and forth between work and hospital visits for the past month. I knew that he must have been stressed, and I couldn't wait for him to finish his contract and come back. I missed him.
"Yeah, Bells," he told me bleakly on the phone, his voice carried slight hints of exhaustion, "So I probably wont be able to return back to the agency for another two weeks or so."
I had to give it my all just to control the sadness in my voice. There was no point in causing Jacob excess stress. What good would I be if I played the disconsolate victim, begging him to come back anyways?
"I see," the response was short. Brief. The less words I used the better; I wasn't exactly a talented actress. The truth was far from it, in fact.
And the conversation ended just like that. Jacob said he loved me, bringing a smile to my face, and then hung up, promising me the world, as he so often did, when he returned.
The doleful news had more of an impact on me than I imagined it would. I almost cried that night– – something that was strictly out of character for me.
I hit the breaks of the car softly as I neared the front of the restaurant. Just as I expected, it was huge. I cursed Alice once more.
When I stepped out of the car, I handed the car keys to the young valet who offered to assist me. I almost chuckled in amusement at how much he blushed when our fingers touched.
I straightened myself out once more, making sure that there were no recent crinkles in the dress from the thirty minutes I had been sitting in the car. It would not get passed Alice's observant eyes, and she definitely wouldn't let it go, either.
Walking slowly– – carefully– – to the front of the restaurant, I kept my eyes furtively low so that I could watch out for any dangerous cracks in the pavement that would threaten to catch my pick-like heels. Though it didn't lower the chances of me tripping on something dramatically, it did put my mind at ease, for the most part. It also demanded enough attention to distract my mind from the many people around me. That was a bonus in itself.
With my attention concentrated on the ground, it was inevitable that I would bump into someone.
"Oh!" I gasped, as I crashed into somebody. Before I could stagger to the floor from the impact, someone grabbed me firmly from the waist and held me up; preventing me from falling.
I was too embarrassed to look up.
"T-thank you…" I stammered, flushed. Leave it to me to collide into someone just seconds after I got out of my car!
I steadied myself, and finally, reluctantly, looked up into the man who I had almost taken down with me. I should at least apologize properly.
"Sorry about that. I wasn't paying atte--" My apology stopped short when I came face to face with what was probably the most stunning face I'd ever seen. He was smiling, and his beautiful, hazel eyes were smoldering me. I couldn't remember what I was going to say…
And then he laughed.
My eyes probed wide as the man suddenly burst into laughter, removing his hand from my waist so that he could support his stomach which was probably aching from the insult it was inflicting to my chagrin.
It was Cullen. I was furious.
"You bastard," I growled between clenched teeth, shoving him away from me. My fury was aroused due to the foreboding humiliation that seared through me. I felt stupid for not getting the extra Aspirin when I had the chance.
Though his barking laugh subsided, he still continued to tremble. I walked away from him, recalling why my aversion towards Cullen was justified.
"Wait up," I heard his voice call after me. No matter how fast I tried to walk, my heels would only permit me so much speed. In an instant he had already caught up with me. I was shaking from anger. It was bad enough that my clumsiness had resulted in the attention of many onlookers, but for him to laugh like that? When I was trying so hard to hold back the tears….
"What's wrong," he sounded startled as I abruptly stopped, turning my back on him. My traitorous tears were already close to spilling, stubbornly loath to listen to me.
"Bella," I felt as his arms grabbed onto my shoulders, and twirled me around to face him. That was all it took. I felt a tear fall in betrayal. My eyes still remained narrowed, and I was still shaking in anger.
"What?" I snapped, glaring at him coldly. It was also out of character for me to cry in front of others, but my clumsiness had always been such a major source of self-consciousness for me. It didn't help at all that I was also prone to cry when angered. In other words: I was an emotional wreck.
"I didn't mean to laugh," he tried to assure me. His expression was so panicked that it almost made me drop my attitude. Almost. "It was just so funny! I've never seen anyone concentrate so hard not to fall before… just to end up almost falling anyway!"
My eyes grew tighter. In what way was that supposed to console me? Though his persuasion skills were top-notch, his comforting ones left much to be desired.
He was just so serious that I could not glower at him anymore. I was still reasonably angered, nonetheless.
"I don't like being laughed at," I admitted, darkly, "so keep in mind not to do it again."
Cullen pursed his lips into a tight line to refrain from laughing again.
I wiped my hand over my eyes and rubbed furiously. Tears always made them irritated.
"Hey, what are you doing," Cullen snapped, grabbing my wrists with a stern hold, "If you do that you'll only irritate them more."
"Let me go," I snapped, trying to pull away from his hold on me. It was futile. His hand-formed manacles only resisted my struggles effortlessly. His grip tightened, but not enough to cause me pain. Why was this guy so strong?
"Hold still," he ordered, pulling me closer to him. Our bodies were almost touching, and our faces were nearly inches apart. What was he going to do?
My heart was pounding loudly in my chest.
And then all I could feel was warm air wash over my face. The smell was sweet.
I stood there, frozen, as Cullen blew into my eyes gently, like a parent would to a child who could not remove a fallen eyelash.
When Cullen pulled away, and released his hold on my wrists, I was still too stunned to move. My breath was frozen in place.
"You know," he started, his eyes running up and down my body, making me feel severely unaware of the fact that I had clothes, "That dress looks magnificent on you."
I gulped.
"What--" My voice was low, probably too low to hear. Even my own ears were having troubles understanding the volume in which I spoke. Cullen cut me off before I could continue.
"They really emphasize your breasts. I didn't know you had enough on you to form any level of cleavage." His tone was serious.
Once again, my eyes probed open at his words. If I had been feeling appreciative to this guy just seconds before, those feelings had definitely diminished with the new comments that rolled out of his smart-ass mouth.
And that is exactly why I hate him! I reminded myself, bitterly, my mental tone hostile.
"You--" I desired nothing more than to once again punch the heckling moron in the face. I was so sick and tired of his impending chaste…! I presumed things would be like this from the start, so why was I even bothering to get uselessly mad?
My hands that had already balled into fists turned rigid when I heard a familiar, high-pitched voice call my name from behind.
"Bella!" I turned around to see Alice rushing at me. I sighed, both from the burning fury that had just subsided and from the speckle of jealousy that I always felt when I looked at Alice. Her movements were always so fluid and graceful. She could shame a ballerina any day.
"Hey, Alice," I tried to sound jocund, at least for Alice's sake.
I peered over her shoulder at the tall, blonde and handsome man that stood nearly a foot away from her; Jasper. Though they had only been dating for a little over under five months, I had already become accustomed to the man's presence. Aside from his whole military obsession, he was a great guy. There was also the benefiting factor that he was just as crazy about Alice, as Alice was about him.
"Hey, Jasper," I greeted him informally. I had almost always done so, since Alice had informed me just after their first date to drop the formalities with him.
"You'll be seeing him for the a long time– – possibly forever," Alice had reassured me when Jasper and I had first been introduced. She had the…feeling again. At the time, I shrugged and did what she asked; it wasn't wise to go against Alice.
"Hi, Bella," Jasper returned the greeting with warm smile.
Alice took a glance behind me, and suddenly removed her arms from around my shoulders. I watched after her, knowingly, as she moved behind me and suddenly called, "Bella?"
'You reap what you sew'
I told myself.
"Yes, Alice?" I tried to sound innocent as I turned around. She was standing nearly two feet in front of Cullen, and her eyes were sparkling with curiosity.
"Introduce us!" She ordered, firmly. Leave it to Alice to pinpoint the exact guy I had brought along with me. If it wasn't her intuition that pointed Cullen out, then it was definitely her assumption that the guy would be gorgeous. I was a manager for beautiful men, after all.
"This is Edward Cullen, my partner for tonight– – " I cleared my throat to hide the resentment in it, "Cullen, this is my friend Alice Brandon and…", I cocked my head in the direction of the man behind her, "…her boyfriend, Jasper Whitlock."
"It's nice to meet you, Edward." Alice smiled, taking the hand that he offered and shaking it enthusiastically.
"The same to you," Edward greeted, his expression gentleman-like. I nearly rolled my eyes. "Thanks for inviting me," he continued as he shook hands with Jasper.
"I'm quite surprised you're here, actually," Alice admitted, and resumed when she noticed that Edward and I had both raised our eyebrows. "I figured that Bella would bring a girl with her or something."
Her voice was smug with approval.
Edwards face flashed into a wider smile. I knew that he wanted to laugh at that.
"And Bella," Alice cooed, happily, running her eyes over my attire, "you look very sexy! Tonight is just full of surprises!"
I frowned at her, and then narrowed my eyes at Cullen who suddenly asked, inquiringly, "What do you mean?"
Alice almost giggled.
"Don't you know Bella's taste in clothing?" She ignored me as I shook my head, warningly, "Of all the clothes this girl has in her closet, her favorite things would definitely be her sweat pants and exercise shirts."
You could tell that Alice didn't find anything funny about that at all. She almost spat the last part of her sentence.
I saw Cullen glance in my direction, and when he realized that I had been looking at him, he flashed me an honored grin.
Jerk.
"So, shall we get going then?" Jasper asked, obviously trying to lighten the mood with a change of subject.
I smiled gratefully at him, and he sent a wink in my direction.
"All right then, let's go." Alice agreed.
I glowered at her. I would get her back for her decision to be so talkative tonight. Even so, it was surprising; Alice wasn't usually so loose lipped. What had changed?
"So…" Cullen prolonged the vowel, "Sweatpants?"
I ignored him.
Cullen was walking right beside me as we followed Alice and Jasper into the restaurant. I wanted to snap at him to not walk so close to me, and then remembered that he was my partner tonight. I couldn't help but think I was a masochist of sorts.
We walked inside, through eloquently grand doors, into what was probably the most majestic and flamboyant dining place I had ever been. I made an attempt to gulp down my nervous-state. It didn't work.
"You don't look so good," Cullen told me, as we began walking to the main dining room.
"Ugh, don't remind me," I nearly barfed, "I hate places like this. It's unsettling."
Cullen stared at me incredulously for a moment, and then– – after seeing the genuine discomfort that was easily showcased on my face– – said, "You're weird."
Humph
. He didn't have to tell
me.
"Thanks for the compliment," I added sourly as we approached a statuesque pair of spiral stairs.
I groaned again. I hated stairs.
"Hold onto me," I commanded viciously, holding out my arm and gesturing for him to lock his own into it. I would overlook his intrigued smirk just this once. It was almost nothing compared to the humiliation I would no doubt have to face if I were to fall down such a long staircase. Almost.
Instead of accepting my arm, Cullen pulled out and offered his own so that I could slip mine into it. I stared at his outstretched limb almost repulsively.
'Stupid men and their stupid pride'
I thought bitterly, rolling my eyes and tucking it under and around his arm. At least he had complied.
My insides were in chaos. The stairs were indeed long, but it was odd that I was so nervous, too. It must have been the heels.
We walked down slowly, carefully, ignoring the impatient coughs and grunts from the people behind us. Cullen was shaking, trying to refrain himself from laughing, making my grip on him not as secure as I had wanted. That only made me walk slower.
When we were finally down the stairs, I breathed a sigh of relief, and Cullen could hold back no longer. Though his laughs were inaudible, the tears that fell from his eyes were indeed visible.
I stormed away from him, indignantly.
Once again, he made almost no effort to catch up to me.
On the way to our reserved table, number 12, I wasted no time in demonstrating to Cullen just how bad I could get when in full blown clumsiness mode. I bumped into a waiter handling shrimp, nearly knocking both him and myself down. I tripped on the hem of some lady's long draping dress, causing it to tear, and resulting with me apologizing like an idiot and giving her my address to send the dry cleaning bill to.
When I had thought that the coast was clear, we were nearly a yard away from the table where Jasper and Alice were seated, I snagged my purse on a golden statue of some Greek god or other, ripping a hole right through the bottom. My many cosmetics, accessories and– – to my absolute horror– – a tampon came falling down, scattering to a full three-foot ranging circumference around us.
By the time we had reached the table, my face was burning crimson. Both Cullen and I were holding various items that had originally been stuffed into my purse in our arms, and Cullen was still shaking uncontrollably.
"What took you guys so long?" Alice asked, skeptically. Her hands arms were crossed impatiently across her chest, and on the table were empty plates of appetizers. So that waiter had already come, huh?
Cullen's restraint was broken, and a loud, roaring sound erupted from him.
I wanted to die.
Edward.
I was going to die.
In an attempt to lessen the pain that churned at my core, I crossed my arms over my abs desperately. My stomach was hurting so much from laughing, I was positive that at any minute I would drop dead!
Never before had I ever indulged in such mind-blowing laughter. I could feel the tremors of my body, and I knew that tears had even fallen within the extremely long time frame that it took us to reach our designated table.
Bella was just too funny. It was just too hilarious!
For reasons unknown to me, I had been questionably eager to attend dinner with Bella. Though her criticizing comment on my looks daunted me, I still accepted her invitation to accompany her for the night. But never would I have expected to enjoy myself so much! I wasn't oblivious to the fact that she was a klutz– – she never failed to drop or spill something in my presence every so often when I lounged in her office, but today's incidents were just amazing. It had never occurred to me that she could be so lethally clumsy, almost to the point of critical disablement.
When I first arrived at the restaurant, I was already having second thoughts about the evening. I'm not one for conservative, pleasantry chatter with people who I barely knew. And it wasn't that I was new to such events, either. Since childhood, I had always attended monotonous and dreary parties, because of the social standing of my parents. Holding mundane chats with stuffy people had become an all-too-familiar routine. That was, presumably, the reason why I hung out with the 'wrong crowd' in high school.
I wasn't interested in abiding by others rules, and living up to expectations that contradicted who I was. That was the prominent reason why I could not get along with anyone since elementary school to middle school, or guys my own age whose fathers were friends with my parents, for that matter. Many people, my parents included, thought that I was just a loner. That was the case, however, it was by my own choice that it were that way. It was I who distanced myself from the people around me. If I had wanted to, I could have easily blended in– – acting like a pompous moron and strutting my fathers wealth, but I abhorred people who were like that. To me, it was nothing less than disgusting.
Even so, just because I didn't flaunt my money, it didn't mean I didn't use it irresponsibly, either. Most of my allowance, and even more than that, at times, went straight to the circuit. I loved cars, and even more so, I loved speed. I spent almost every holiday, weekend or vacation renting out Karts or Stellar-Cars, using my fathers influence, of course. I would have loved to have made myself a career racing, but I knew that my mother– – both of them– – would have died of heart attacks at the mention. Even if I didn't care about anyone else around me, I did love my parents. Them, and my older step brother, Emmett.
Living almost twenty-years like that, it was to be expected that I wasn't the type to laugh so violently. It was more of a case that nothing had ever amused me to that point. Aside from Emmett and a handful of good acquaintances throughout the years, I had never seriously laughed before. Even the girls I dated were a bore. Including the one I dated, now. No one person had ever truly made me laugh.
That is, until I met Bella.
But Bella was just strange. That's probably why she amused me so. She was extremely unlike the other girls I knew, who basically threw themselves at me. That was also to be expected. I had money, I had good looks, not to mention that I was tall. I was accustomed to women of all ages, batting their eyes lashes and sending winks– – as well as phone numbers– – in my direction, but Bella was not like them. The only things here eyes ever did for me was narrow in anger, and the only requests she ever made for me was to 'leave her alone' or 'stop torturing her with my presence'. She threw objects, and even her own hand at times, but never herself. See? Bella was just strange.
I felt comfortable with Bella. She wasn't exactly a 'woman' in my eyes. If anything, she would be most closely associated with a Chihuahua. When she was mad at me, that is.
I was also expecting her to come with the usual boring clothes she often wore. But Bella had surprised me. Her choice of livery was unexpected. During the two weeks that I had known her, her style had always been plain. Although her clothes possessed name-brand titles, she lacked the selfish demands of wanton attention. It was almost as if she only wore expensive items for the sake of her image, not because she wanted to stand out. That was unanticipated; Didn't all girls like to look great? The thought also amused me; she was, after all, a manager for fashion models.
But today… she looked, admittedly, amazing. I was almost stunned. The dark-blue dress that stuck nicely to her skin complimented the natural curves of her body, and I was quite partial to that color with her complexion. Her hair was tied up, allowing only twin strands of dark hair to fall over her face. She wore makeup, though not much, and heels higher than two inches, no less. If it weren't for her almond shaped eyes, and heart shaped face; I would have never considered that she was truly herself.
But what was more interesting was that she focused so intensely on the pavement below her feet, watching for any cracks or other tiny dangers that threatened to break her thin ankles. She didn't even notice me standing right in front of her. Of course, I could have moved away, but where was the fun in that? She bumped into me, as expected, and nearly fell down in the process. Without realizing it, I had already grabbed her waist to support her. I was never intending to laugh… much, at least, but when I saw her flustered expression I couldn't hold myself back.
What shocked me most of all was the fact that she was crying! It was a sight that I had never thought possible, but there it was… there she was… shedding tears in either anger or abashment. Her eyes were fierce and furious, yet I still could not be sure what truly caused her tears. I was stupefied. I didn't know what to do.
Then, to my great surprise, she was honest enough to tell me that she did not like being laughed at. For some reason, that hit me the wrong way. I felt guilty.
I nearly scoffed at myself. I wasn't one to feel guilt, either, since I rarely did things that I would regret. My actions and words were usually direct interactive means of what I wanted or felt.
When she started rubbing my eyes, I found myself wanting to comfort her. I didn't like the sight of her tears just as much as she probably disliked shedding them.
That, too, was new to me. I couldn't even count the times where my girlfriend, Tanya, had cried, and I would just wait for her to stop. That, or feign concern. Either way, it wasn't genuine– – on both our parts.
Her shocked expression at my sudden tenderness summoned the part me that enjoyed teasing her. I couldn't help but make a comment about her dress… and breasts. The words slipped out before I even thought of saying them.
Another uncommon action that I rarely ever experienced.
I took note that her tiny hands had balled into fists, and I was expecting her to swing at me. I enjoyed those little 'fights' of ours very much. She was unbelievably cute when she was made, and it was easy to tell that she didn't do them with anyone else, either. It was the sudden calling of her name that pulled her out of her tempered state.
A cute, pixie-like girl, who I assumed– – and had been correct– – was Alice, came rushing at her, followed by a good looking guy who I figured was her boyfriend. She spotted me immediately, and gave me a weird look. I was used to women staring at me, but this one was not doing it in the usual way that I knew.
The girl pushed herself away from Bella and walked over to me with these…seeing eyes or something. It was nothing like I'd ever felt before. If I hadn't known better, I would have thought I was naked. That's how I felt, anyways.
It was a feeling that I usually got when I was being scolded by my father, only much, much stronger.
"Introduce us!" She ordered Bella, eyeing me oddly. I was surprised that she even knew it was I who was accompanying her friend. I figured that Bella had probably given her some kind of physical description of me, but when I glanced at Bella, she looked just as amazed as I. It wasn't as if I had been directly next to Bella, either.
"Hello, Edward." she greeted me. I nearly flinched when she put emphasis on my name, as if she were implying that there was something more to it. It wasn't so much rude as it was eerie. I didn't like the way she said it.
I was also verily bothered at how Bella kept referring to me as 'Cullen'. That annoyed me. When I thought about it, not once had she casually called me by my first name since the time we met. It was a struggle to keep my face friendly.
And then the strangest thing happened when Alice took my hand. A shock surged though me, tingling my insides uncomfortably. When I looked into Alice's eyes, she was smoldering me with her own. I felt as if I couldn't breathe, until she finally looked away from me and pulled her hand from my own, breaking whatever it is that we just shared.
That never happened to me before, either.
My first impression of Alice was that she was a real talker. Though, she had barely known me, she was already giving me a lot of details about Bella. I had to admit, the information was indeed interesting, especially the info that validated my prediction on why she dressed so casually. What amazed me was how it seemed as if Alice wanted me to know.
When I took another glance at Bella, she looked both angry and surprised at her friends sudden chatter. It seemed that Bella was just as shocked at how much Alice was talking.
When the boyfriend managed to change the subject, I was probably just as relieved as Bella was. I was interested in hearing about the side of her that she kept secret, but, on that same token, I also felt uncomfortable, hearing about it from Alice as if that were her intention. There was something about Alice that rubbed me the wrong way. From the weird looks she gave me, to the odd way she said my name – – – her behavior almost seemed devious. Simply put: She made me feel uneasy.
All my thoughts on that matter, however, ended when we reached an amazingly long set of stairs. I almost felt Bella grow rigid aside me.
"All you alright?" I asked her. She seemed as if she was going to be sick.
Even though she nodded, it looked to me like she was trying to convince herself more than she was trying to assure me. My lips pulled into an involuntary smile.
"Hold on to me!" she commanded, holding her arm out for me to take it. Was she so scared of falling? It took everything I had not to laugh aloud.
I held out my arm for her to take, instead. I saw the look of annoyance on her face, but I was raised– – to a certain age, at least– – to escort the woman. It wasn't the opposite.
Not that I truly perceived her as a woman, of course.
By the time we had finally reached the last landing of the stairs, I was almost laughing. We had been walking at an such an absurd pace, and every so often a person behind us would clear their throats in impatience or mutter something unintelligible in annoyance. Her face would darken in color, but still, she ignored them and kept her attention on the steps below her feet. Muscle cramps had already begun to form in my stomach. Now I understood why she only wore shoes with thick, short heels. It's because she considered heels dangerous!
To my amusement, and to her extreme embarrassment, her clumsy streak did not end just there. On the way to the table, she had been so preoccupied with trying to out-walk me that she came slamming into a waiter, causing the shrimp on the poor mans tray to come splattering everywhere. In her efforts to apologize, she stepped on the hem of some woman's white dress, tearing a long, black tear right through it. She was a brilliant shade of maroon when she had to give the woman her address to send the cleaning bill to.
I was almost dying, but managed to keep my laughter to low, almost inaudible chuckles. I was still shaking uncontrollably, though.
We were nearly a yard away from our table when I heard her breathe a sigh of relief. We had accomplished half that yard without incident, when Bella suddenly snagged her purse on a golden statue of the Greek goddess Aphrodite. All of her belongings came spilling down. By that time, I was almost on my knees from laughing so hard! I helped her pick up her stuff as an excuse to bend down, but immediately shot back up when I noticed what the first thing I had grabbed was: A purple tampon.
I didn't know they sold them in that color.
She snatched it from my hand so quickly, that a snort still managed to escape. Looking at her heated face, I wasn't sure who was closer to death; me, from laughing so much, or Bella, for her shameful mortification?
When we finally reached the table, it was I who breathed a sigh of relief. I knew that if anything else had happened I would have exploded.
And then Alice had to hit the final blow.
"What took you guys so long?" She asked. I watched as Bella's face did the impossible. It reddened even more as she looked down to see plates of appetizers on the table. So the waiter had already come…
And that was it. I exploded. With one line, my efforts came crumbling down and I was consumed by the painful humor that had been eating away at me for the longest time.
I couldn't breathe, and though I knew it was rude, and even improper, I couldn't help myself any more than Bella could at her awful clumsiness.
That Edward was new to me. An Edward who couldn't control his laughter even to save-face, wasn't a me who I had known all my life. I wasn't familiar with him.
At that moment, I also thought that I wouldn't mind getting to know that Edward, either.
I pinched my sides, trying to calm the aching throb in my ribs. Never in my life had I laughed so much before. To have thought that it could ever be so….painful. I had always believed that laughing to the point of physical soreness was impossible. Foolishly inane, even. But the experience itself was mind-blowing.
I was right, after all. I was really going to die.
