AN – Gosh you guys are pretty pissed with Alice aren't you? Poor little pixie :( OK so no lemons in this one, but lots of Alice and Bella time. Thanks again to everyone who reviewed and those of you who didn't, talk to me I don't bite.... hard.
"Edward I really need to call Alice... Edward?" He removed his mouth from my neck and brought his face level with mine. He had a pleading look in his eyes which I couldn't resist. I kissed him gently.
"No, you're right. Go phone Alice, I'm going to shower." He rolled off of me and stormed to the bathroom. He was pissed. OK so I was embarrassed but I wasn't angry with her, I hadn't told anyone Edward was here, she didn't know. I hated to think she might be feeling guilty. Edward needed to get over himself. I threw my sweatpants on and went to grab Edwards hoody but decided mine was a better option right now.
"Alice."
"Oh Bella I'm so sorry I didn't realise, you didn't tell me. I'm really sorry. I didn't .."
"Hush your gums woman! I'm sorry you had to see that, I guess I should have told you he was here."
"Sorry Bella." She sounded a little upset.
"Well I am absolutely furious with you pixie and I think you should come to my house later on so I can take you out in my new car and we can hit the sales. Sound good to you?" I was answered with an excited squeal and had to hold the phone away from my ear.
"I love you Bella."
"I love you too you freaky little pixie. Just when you get here, try knocking."
"Good idea." She was laughing, mission complete. " So Bella, tell me everything .. I need to know details."
"La la la la Bye Alice." I snapped my phone shut and went to deal with the big kid sulking in my bathroom.
I sat on the bed listening to my new ipod and singing aloud.
"I opened the window and a breeze rolled in and I jizzed in my pants!" I was laughing my head off when Edward came back into the room wrapped in just a towel scowling at me. His body really was amazing. I stared at his happy trail and unconsciously bit my lip. He threw the towel at my head and I suddenly came back to earth.
"Take a fucking picture it'll last longer." I sighed and snaked my arms around his waist and kissed the muscles in his back as he struggled to put his boxers back on.
"You know Alice didn't know you were here, it's not fair to be so pissed at her."
"You locked yourself in the bathroom all night, she took you away from me. How can I not be pissed." He was starting to come around, giving up on the boxers he turned to face me and wrapped his arms around me.
"Because Edward Masen, you love me and I love Alice, therefore you can't be mad at her, it's like a law or something." A brief flash of a smile played across his lips before he turned all serious on me again. "And, Charlie's working again tonight, I just thought maybe you'd like to stay over again, obviously not."
I worked my way out of his arms and started walking to the bathroom hiding my smile. It wasn't long before he ran up to me and kissed the spot behind my ear.
"OK OK I love Alice too!" I giggled at him before pulling him into the bathroom.
"I thought as much. I may need some help washing, are you up to the challenge?"
Alice turned up the stereo in my new car. I really fucking loved this car.
This was never the way I planned,
Not my intention,
I got so brave, drink in hand,
Lost my discretion,
It's not what, I'm used to,
Just wanna try you on,
I'm curious for you,
Caught my attention.
Alice and I looked at each other before belting out the chorus.
"I kissed a girl and I liked it, the taste of her cherry chapstick!" We burst into a fit of giggles as the old guy in the next lane stared at us like we should be in an asylum. I pulled away from the traffic lights and sped along the road to the multi storey car park.
We spent an hour in Topshop, Alice couldn't decide between 4 pairs of jeans and ended up buying them all. We then moved on to H&M, she decided I needed new clothes to go with my new car. I don't see how, I hadn't worn half the stuff from the last new wardrobe she bought me. We stopped for lunch at a little café outside the shopping centre.
"Bella?"
"Mmm?" Alice liked to talk to me when I had my mouth full.
"When are you going to tell me about yours and Edwards sexcapades?" I choked on my bagel.
"Alice. I'm not telling you anything ... besides there's nothing to tell." I stared at the table, hoping she hadn't heard the last part.
"What do you mean there's nothing to tell? Looked like there was something to tell when I was there yesterday, c'mon Bella you're telling me Edward hasn't been to pussy palace? No taco for tea? Theres no toad in your hole? No.."
"Alice I get it! You can stop now." I was bright red and flustered. I lowered my voice. "I'm still a virgin, we were going to permanently remove that title yesterday but .. obviously someone got in the way."
She groaned.
"I'm sorry Bella." I shot her an evil look and she stuck her tongue out at me. "Have you erm .. done anything at all?"
"Well yeah we've done .. other stuff. He's staying over again tonight. Don't say anything please though Alice, I'm shitting myself as it is I really don't need Emmett rubbing it in."
She beamed at me. Oh God. That normally meant she had some kind of plan that I wasn't going to like. She threw some money at the waiter and told him to keep the change before dragging me into a salon. I grimaced at the thought.
At first it was nice, I had a full body massage. I wasn't really that comfortable having another woman rubbing stuff into my naked skin but it was relaxing once I'd stopped tensing. Then I was made to sit in a big bath of warm mud, I thought it would be gross but I actually really enjoyed it. It was surprisingly not as muddy as I thought it would be. I had a shower, finally alone. I let the water cascade onto my surprisingly soft skinned back and I leant on the wall of the cubicle. It was as if every muscle in my body was relaxing. I positively screamed when Alice opened the cubicle door.
"Bella seriously, we haven't got time for you to whack off with the shower head, hurry up." I huffed at her as she passed me a towel. That's when I stopped enjoying myself. I had my legs and armpits waxed. I thought the legs were bad but I was in for a whole new world of pain when the canvas strip was ripped off my armpit. I swear half my skin went with it. Then I was told to put on a tiny pair of pants.
"Alice, what's going on."
"You're getting a bikini wax, come on Bella, lets not dawdle."
I couldn't have prepared myself for the pain I encountered. It was horrible and I could barely walk afterwards. I waddled out the door, finally allowed in my own clothes again before taking a seat for my facial and make up application. It was a little difficult considering my eyes were still watering from my traumatic vag-destroying wax. I looked in the mirror, I had to hand it to Alice she knew how to make a girl look hot. Alice had specifically requested they give me natural looking make up so I was wearing a thin layer of foundation and some brown mascara. It really brought out my eyes and I had some kind of odd glow to my face. Not like a radioactive glow, a healthy glow.
Alice smiled at me again and went to take my hand, we walked out of the salon. Well, Alice walked, I looked like I'd crapped my pants and was trying to keep it from running down my leg.
"Oh Bella you're such a woos, it doesn't hurt that much and you can't even feel it after 2 hours. Trust me." I didn't want to be able to trust her, I didn't want to know how many pubes she had but I did. For some reason I thought maybe Rosalie would be immune to the pain. She probably had it all taken off. Ewww I'm thinking about Rosalie's lady parts!!
I dropped Alice off at her house and was given strict instructions as to what to wear tonight. She was right, the pain was fading and I could at least walk normally now. As I sped out of her drive I could hear her shouting after me.
"Remember Bella, leggings and the top with the bow on it!"
I sighed as I was suddenly overcome with stage fright again. It was nearly time to get my freak on.
AN- Ok, hope you liked that one. It was a bit short but I'm getting impatient for the big lemon. Don't forget to review. I'll love you forever.... Emmett and Rosalie style ;)
