Disclaimer: I have no excuses, only words. I'm so sorry for the delay but I hope you'll enjoy it any how. And as always let me know what you think!
This is for "it's just me" who sent me a very long, very flattering review and reminded me that I was still writing this story. Definitely kicked my but into finishing this chapter.
Thank you all for your kind words. I'm always taken aback by how many people read and review even when I'm dismal at keeping to my schedule.
Happy Sunday!
-S
P.S. If it has typos or mistakes, I'm so sorry. I'll read through and fix them in the morning. But I figure you might still enjoy it as it is. :)
Miss Imprint
Chapter 28: Fear
"What?" I stood frantically checking my limbs, my heart beating faster and faster—and it was beating. I was alive. "Oh shit—I'm alive." I laughed, it was too surreal to even imagine but then I was grabbing her and spinning her around. "I'm alive!" I couldn't stop saying the words.
Alice was just watching me like she'd never seen me before and her smile was blinding as she skipping with me, her feet barely touching the floor, far more graceful than I could ever be but I couldn't care in the least because I was alive.
"I don't understand." I wheezed as we finally fell to the ground, exhausted and spinning.
"I don't either." She said, flabbergasted as she watched me, upside down from where she was laying. "You're sure he bit you."
"Yes. Yes." I shuddered as I remembered the icy bite of his teeth against my skin. "Besides, the blood, there's no other explanation."
She was squinting at my neck and then suddenly she was beside me, her fingers running across my skin beneath the cloth leaving goose bumps in their wake. "The mark is here." She said, wonderingly. "Just below your dress—I didn't see it before." She made a face. "That's going to scar."
"Right now, even that thrills me." I took a breath and then tempered my smile, a bit nervous that I might have offended Alice by being so happy to be alive. After all, she was dead. And there was no coming back for her.
She waved me away before I could open my mouth to comment. "Don't even—I'm thrilled for you Cassie." Her eyes softened. "It wasn't your time."
"Good, I—"I caught sight of her eyes again. Dark. Hungry. "Alice?"
"Hmm?"
"Would you like to—"I extended my wrist, unsure of how to finish.
She slid away from me almost instantly, back against the far wall, her figure tense. "No." She said, somewhat tightly. "I think that would be dangerous."
"Why? We already know it won't turn me—and you're hungry."
"We know it worked once." She corrected. "Maybe it was a freak accident, maybe it was luck, maybe it's you but we're not going to risk that for me." She smiled, self-deprecating, "besides, I'm not entirely sure I'd be able to stop."
I nodded slowly. "Just thought I'd offer."
"And I appreciate it." She smiled. "But no…well, not yet, anyway." She smiled.
I let my eyes shut as I felt everything sway for a moment.
"Cassie?"
"Just dizzy." I said, breathing slowly. "I lost a lot of blood—I think. I'm not sure."
"It's going to be okay." She said, "You know that, don't you?"
"Alice…" I turned to her, smiling wryly. "The last time you said that, we both died."
She laughed. "Do over?"
"Yeah." I laughed. "Sure, why not?"
She froze then, paling, which for her was an accomplishment. "Cassie, they're coming."
I turned grimly, wrapping my fingers around hers as she appeared next to me. And together we exhaled as the door opened to reveal the last person in the world I expected to see.
"Ana?"
"Cassie?" She was heaving, crying, her eyes streaming as she fell forward into my arms and I looked beyond her into the darkness but the heavy wooden door slammed behind her and then we were alone.
"It's me. It's me." I reassured her, as I fell down with her, unable to bear her weight after losing so much blood. "Hey, it's okay." I shot a helpless look at Alice who shrugged with wide eyes. She hadn't seen this coming, either.
But then Ana's eyes glazed over and I saw her stumble back slightly, her own knees bending as she fell beside me.
"Alice!" I gasped, "Alice!" I grabbed for the small blonde hastily so her head wouldn't smack against the stone floor.
Alice blinked herself free after what seemed like hours though it must have been seconds. She was shaking her head, her lips mouthing the same words over and over. She doesn't know. She doesn't know anything.
"Great." I mumbled as I rubbed the heaving back and tightened my grip on Ana who seemed so small as she came to, trembling and sobbing on my lap. "Ana, I need you to tell me what happened?"
"Who is she?" She asked; her voice suspicious as she caught sight of Alice.
"A friend." I wasn't sure what else to call Alice. Vampire didn't seem to have the same right to it. "She's cool, I promise."
Alice smiled faintly in response. I could see her dropping her shoulders, trying to look as non-threatening as possible.
"She looks like them." Ana whispered, but not quietly enough.
I saw the way Alice froze at that, her eyes tightening just for a moment before her face resumed its normal placid expression. I could have smacked Ana if I didn't want to find out how she got here so much. "Ana, Ana," I tilted her face up to mine. Even now, her cheeks blotched from the tears, and her eyes pink, she was pretty. "How did you get here?"
"I don't—I was out with Seth," I felt my stomach twinge at that, but it was concern, only concern I reminded myself, as she continued "we were going to the pier in Port Angeles and then—"she broke off, her entire form shaking. "I'm sorry, I just can't think."
"You have to." I was sharper than I should have been. "Please."
"You're right, of course you're right."
I wanted to shake her. Stop mumbling, and tell me Seth is okay. "Ana!"
"Right, right," she took a long breath. "So we were ki—sitting." She fumbled. Awkward. Her cheeks reddening further.
I fought to keep my expression passive. That didn't matter, I reminded myself. "And?"
"And then Seth, he got really panicked and he was telling me that we had to get away from the water and that we had to get to the car and he tried to pick me up but I—god, I was so stupid, I thought it was a game and I kept making him chase me and then everything went really quiet, even the leaves seemed to slow." She was feverish as she talked, almost as if she was there, her eyes seeing the moonlit pier instead of our dungeon. Her fingers tightened their grip on my wrists and I knew that just for a second it was Seth, his powerful forearms; that she wasn't feeling me at all.
I ripped my arms away. It was enough that she got him; she wasn't going to use me as well. "Well?"
She spluttered a little before finding herself. "I—I—he told me to get behind him, and then he told me that I had to run and I had to get into the car and drive. I kept asking him what was wrong and telling him that I wouldn't leave him there but he kept insisting. So I…I ran." She whispered the word, guilty and embarrassed. "I was so scared, he wasn't himself and I didn't know what to do, so I ran."
"It's okay." I encouraged. "Then what?"
"There was this really horribly ripping noise, and then all this—"she was incredulous, then, "it's going to sound crazy but I could have sworn I heard howling, and growling—like a jungle cat or something." She said, finally.
I swallowed a smile, but even Alice was grinning a little.
"Maybe it was a wolf?" I managed.
"Maybe." She didn't seem certain. "I was terrified that it was going to get Seth, it was making awful sounds, so I—I got out, and I found rocks, and I ran back to him…I guess I thought I could scare it away. But then it stopped howling."
I froze. No. Anything but that.
"And then everything went dark." She shook her head. "Oh Cassie, I don't know how I got here, the last thing I remember was looking at the pier and there was this great, dark shape and I was so scared that it had gotten Seth and then I was being thrown into here."
It was Seth, I wanted to scream at her. But I couldn't. "Was it moving?"
She shook her head. "I don't know—I hope not! I hope it died, right there and then, the way it was going after him."
I fought really hard not to hit her. It wasn't her fault that she didn't assume Seth was a werewolf like I had. It wasn't. That wasn't what normal people did.
And then horrible pernicious voice in my head spoke up. It wasn't what normal people did. It was what imprints did.
But I wasn't. I wasn't. I needed to remember that. No matter how terribly I thought of her, she was the imprint. She was the one that mattered more.
Exhaling slowly and ignoring Alice's sympathetic black eyes, I turned to her. "Ana, this is really important. Try to remember."
She bit her lip, taking a nervous glance at Alice who had stood up and was walking carefully over to us. "I think so." She swallowed and then nodded to herself. "Yeah—it was, it was breathing."
I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. "Okay, good, good."
"Ana," Alice interjected from beside me, seemingly knowing that I was processing. "My name is Alice Cullen." She didn't hold out her hand. "I'm a friend of Cassie's and Seth's from a long time ago."
Ana nodded, smiling warily. The mention of Seth's name seemed to reassure her. I think Alice knew it would.
"I'm going to speak with Cassie for a moment, okay?"
Ana nodded.
I let Alice drag me back into the corner. "Cassie, they're going to come at dawn." She said, quietly. "And once they see you…"
She trailed off, but I knew what she was going to say.
"They're going to know." I finished for her.
She nodded, slowly, watching me carefully. I think she was waiting for me to break down. But all of this was so far past that. I just wanted it to be over. "They're going to bite me against, aren't they Alice?"
She nodded. "They'll be here at dawn and then you'll be taken to a sterile room with a white tiled floor and an IV set up to keep you hydrated. The room is large, it must be upstairs, there's sunlight coming from a window near the top."
As she talked, I realized what she was doing. Escape routes, she was describing escape routes.
"The door that shuts behind you is solid, too solid for you to break through but it is not impossible."
Code. It was too solid for me but not for Seth.
"The window can be reached but you'll have to jump for it. The lever is small, it winds open and the glass pulls outside. The drop from the window is no more than eight feet. There will be one person with you in the room-Jane." She shuddered. "Mind her-she hurts with her mind not her body."
I nodded. "And then?"
Her eyes were faraway again. "I can't-they want to take your blood, while you're scared-Aro, he's still convinced this will work. He's manic, Cassie, and he wants to be stronger. And then-"she smiled, then, brilliantly, "you disappear."
"How is that in any way a good thing?"
She laughed, winking. "I can't see werewolves."
I blew past that, I couldn't stop think about that-to consider what it would mean to see him again after this. "Can you tell how they're going to persuade him to change?"
She shook her head. "Not yet-I'll keep trying."
"We have until dawn."
"We have until dawn." She repeated, nodding and slid down the wall. I sat beside her and together we waited and watched Ana fall asleep.
Ana had slept fitfully through the night, periodically waking up and asking us where she was, and then crying herself back to sleep when she heard our answer. I fared no better. When the dawn came, Alice had told me nothing new.
Neither of us could seem to close our eyes. And when the door shifted open, Alice pulled me to my feet, mutely squeezing my hand, her eyes saying what she couldn't. Get out. They said. If you get the chance, get out.
I smiled tightly, but even I knew the hope was hollow. Besides, I couldn't leave her or Seth or even Ana. We were getting out of this together, or we weren't getting out at all.
It was Heidi, her face smug and superior, but it melted away into shock when she saw me. I raised an eyebrow daring her to comment but she just followed me, subdued and thoughtful as we walked.
Aro was waiting for me outside of the door Alice had described, his arm extended for me to take it. He was watching me with eyes so focused, so careful that it was all I could do not to look away.
"You are unchanged." He said, wonder in his voice. He reached for my hand, his fingers brushing over my flesh, burning in comparison to him. Or maybe I was feverish. "You are resistant to the poison in me."
"I guess." I pulled away from him.
He laughed unhappily. "I suppose you would not understand what it is to find someone I cannot kill."
"Did you ever try not killing people?" I quipped morosely.
He ignored me. "I have lived a thousands years, perhaps two"—it seemed strange to me that he could forget which it was but then a thousand years was a long time, and maybe after that time just didn't matter any more—"and in all of that time, I have learned that I am a disease." He was somber, his great red eyes sad and old. "I prey on your species as you prey on others, but unlike you, I have no temporal constraints, I will continue to ravage my way through your meager billions until one day I have drunk the life from every one of you."
"Then stop." I wasn't going to be sympathetic, no matter how his soliloquy had taken me by surprise. He didn't deserve it. "If you think your lifestyle is so immoral then stop."
"I cannot stop." He smiled sadly. "To stop is to die. And that is the strange thing about life, no matter how much you have of it, you always want more."
"You don't have to drink human blood." I reminded him. "The Cullen's survive on animal blood."
"I'm surprised, Cassandra." He shook his head. "Do you truly believe that the Cullen's are superior to me? Animal, human, what is the difference? It is murder all the same."
"Animals are not humans." I protested. "We have consciousness, we can separate mind from body."
"Can you?" He asked, wonderingly. "If I snapped your neck, would your mind stay intact? And What about your precious wolves?"
I didn't like the ring of reason in his voice. So I switched the subject. "What happens now?"
"Alice has no doubt told you where I would take you." He said, admiringly. "You've a friend waiting for you." And with that he pushed the door open and slammed it behind me.
Seth was on the ground, the room was dark and Alice was wrong. There was no IV, there was no Jane; there was only Seth, me, and the overwhelming tang of blood saturating the room.
"Seth?" Please be okay, please be okay, I don't care about any of it, Ana, me, the imprinting, the fact that we're probably not going to ever get out of here, just please be okay. "Seth!" I said louder, and then more urgently. "Seth."
He moved. He was sleeping. Not dead. Not hurt, just sleeping.
He sat up slowly, shaking his head and rubbing his palms over his eyes. "You're hearing things, Seth." He mumbled quietly and my heart flipped.
"You aren't, I promise."
He froze, completely one hundred percent froze. "Cassie?"
"Yeah." I said, slowly, my heart beating so fast, I thought it was going to jump right out of my chest and then he turned around and his eyes, they were softer than I'd ever seen them, and suddenly, none of it mattered, only that he was okay and here and that I was okay and here and then his arms were around me and I remembered how well we fit together.
I could hear him saying my name over and over and how glad he was that I was here, and alive, and he couldn't believe it. And his hands, his incredible hands that were so warm they were almost burning my skin, cold from the stale, frigid underground air. I hadn't realized how cold I was until now.
"You're freezing." He observed, quietly into my hair.
I giggled, strangely giddy. "Yeah—the freaking vampires stole my coat." I glanced mournfully at my bare feet. "And my shoes."
"Cassie." He groaned.
"They were Christian Louboutin!"
"Shit-really?"
"Yeah! Alice gave them to me for—"I broke off as he cracked up. "Right, I forgot you have a sense of humor."
He squeezed me and then set me down on the table, his hands rubbing up and down my arms. "I can't believe you're here." He said, his voice quiet. "Are you okay? I don't even know what to—"He broke off jaggedly.
"Hey," I tipped his chin up, smiling half-way, "I'm good. Don't worry."
He nodded slowly, but his arms kept pumping, like if he stopped then I would disappear and he'd realize this was all a dream. And then, because it would have been too much to ask for a single moment of non-angst between us, he ruined it. "I'm just glad Ana got away."
I snorted at that, pushing him off me. Of course, he had to mention her. And of course, I had to tell him that no, she didn't actually get away; she was here, because she couldn't follow directions and then everything would be about her. I meant that in the least selfish way possible; of course. "She didn't." I said, resigned. "She's here, Seth."
"No, she's not." He shook his head. "She got away, I told her to run away."
"Well, she didn't." My voice was curter than I wanted it to be so I softened it with a shrug. "I guess that means she likes you."
He fixed me with a glare. "This isn't a joke, she could get hurt, she could die, she could get turned."
"Seth, she was with me—she's with Alice now, she's safe."
"Safe?" He cried, incredulous. "You think she's safe."
"You were glad to see me. Why is she any different?" I stepped back, annoyed, furious. He was so oblivious, and careless and it felt like every time her fucking name came up he was auto-tuned to only think about her.
"Cassie, she's my imprint, if something happens to her—"
"You'll survive." I shook him hard. "She's the love of your life Seth, I get that, but she's not your life. You don't live or die with her. Just like you wouldn't live or die with me. So grow up and shut up."
He shook me off. "You don't get it, do you? It's not like I could control this, it's not like I had a choice, like I picked this. You're so fucking happy moping about how you're life fucking sucks because you cheated on me and I moved on, but I didn't Cassie. The cheating thing—fuck I get it, and you know what, if I had to deal with the idea that you might leave me in a second for someone else then I'd probably do it too. I probably would have forgiven you the next day. But I didn't get the choice. I fucking got blindsided and all of a sudden, I'm in love with a girl I don't know anything about and it scares the shit out of me because I can't control any of it." He was standing now, backing me into a corner and my legs were trembling. "I can't control the fact that I love her, Cassie," he was almost whispering now, "and I can't control the fact that I am tied to her, that every part of me is tied to her. But what I can control is what I feel for you, and that's why I stopped, because I know what it does, I know better than anyone what it does so I let you go because you deserve better."
He was heaving, his magnificent eyes burning amber as they looked into mine and my hands reach up into his hair, sinfully soft and thick.
"Oh." I exhaled.
"That's all you can say?" His grin was wry and sarcastic and everything I loved about him.
"You said you could control what you feel about me." I said, suddenly, and his eyes widened impossibly. "Feel, not felt."
"I meant felt," he said, "I don't—"
But what he didn't I wouldn't find out. At that moment the door slammed in, and Aro stepped into the light.
"And on that note," He clapped his hands and one of the blackened walls lightened and beyond was Alice, hunched, eyes glued to the floor and Ana staring at her like she'd never seen her in her life.
"What are you doing?" I found my voice first and slipped past Seth towards the wall, my hands pressed against the glass. There was blood, not mine, fresh spilling from Ana's neck.
"Alice has been chained." Aro observed. "And if you don't comply, I will release her, and she will kill your imprint."
Seth was trembling, his eyes narrowed furiously.
It was what I'd always knew would happen. I thought I'd been so clever with Alice, leaving him on my own.
But it was going to happen anyway. He was going to have to choose.
It was me or her.
Just as it was always going to be.
And I was going to lose.
Just as I was always going to.
"What do you want?" His voice was low, hoarse with fear.
Aro smiled stepping closer to Seth, watching as my best friend swallowed hard, his fists clenching as he tried to stay human. "Don't stall on my account." He said, watching enthralled. "I've always wanted to see a transformation."
Seth's eyes lighted on him, but before the thought could fully materialize, Aro was quick to put it out.
"If I die, Alice is released. If I am harmed, Alice is released. And if Cassie dies, Alice will be released."
Seth tilted his head in confusion. "Then what—" he began before breaking off. "I don't care what you want. I'll do it. Just leave Ana alone."
"I'd like to." Aro assured. But neither of us were remotely comforted. "So long as you comply."
"Whatever you want." Seth's gaze kept flipping between us, from me to the window to Aro, not sure where the greatest threat was anymore.
"I want you to scare Cassandra."
"What?"
"I want you to—"
"Scare Cassie—yeah, I heard. I just don't understand."
"It's not for you to understand," Aro said, patronizingly, "but for you to do." He flicked his gaze to me. "You'll find out soon enough. Now, change."
My heart was racing in my chest and I felt like I was going to vomit, or pass out, or cry.
But when Seth looked at me, I didn't do any of those things, I just smiled and nodded softly.
And he nodded back. No matter what happened, that would never change. We'd always be able to talk with a look.
"Go on." Aro said, "Change."
And in the blink of an eye, Seth was gone and in his place was a wolf, larger than anything I'd ever seen, and then he was over me, his teeth pressed hard into my neck.
Aro's eyes widened. "Frighten, not kill."
Seth growled fiercely and even as the sound shattered my ear drums, I wasn't scared. This had to work, Aro needed me. He wouldn't risk this. And Seth knew that. Because Seth was smarter than anyone else I knew. It had only taken feeling my scar when he'd picked me up, and my pulse to figure out that I'd stayed human after being bitten. And that was strange. And that those in power were always fascinated by what was strange.
Aro, just smiled, softly. "I had hoped we would avoid this." He raised an arm. "Release her."
" Cassie!" But it was Alice, not Ana, who screamed for me. "I can't—I'm going to try—I'm going to try but I can't—"
Ana was too scared to move, frozen against the wall, her hands gripped against her neck, smearing the blood that slipped from the cut.
And suddenly I was on the ground and Seth was backing away from me, rearing up on his hind legs as he ran forward, slamming into the window, again and again. He was roaring now, the sound ricocheting off the walls but it was to no avail.
As I watched the horror unfurl on Ana's face, as she saw Seth transform for the first time, I thought of Zeus and Semele. Semele was the mortal woman who had demanded to see Zeus in all his glory and she burned, her weaker form unable to comprehend him in his entirety.
Seth slammed against the glass again, harder and harder and as he did, I thought of what he'd said before.
I'm in love with a girl I don't know anything about and it scares the shit out of me because I can't control any of it.
And I knew what I had to do.
I let my eyes fall shut, my heart thudding in my chest as I turned to Alice. "Just do it, Alice! It's the only way-"
But before I could finish, he'd knocked my to the floor, growing, furious, and terrifying. I heard myself cry out, the sound strange and high and breathy as my shut against his breath, hotter than anything I'd ever felt and his furious eyes.
It's not safe. He'd told me once. I'm not myself when it happens.
And in that moment, with him over me, his entire, quarter ton weight pressed against me, the air sneaking out of my lungs as he stopped me from talking, I believed him.
And then he was gone and Aro's teeth sliced into my neck, drinking, drinking, forever drinking.
Seth, his eyes larger in his canine state snapped to mine as he realized what had happened; what I'd done. I focused on them as I felt the blood drain out of my body and my limbs grow weaker and the world darker until everything became nothing once again.
