In the Present
A HariPo fanfic
by mew-tsubaki
Note: I haven't finished To the Future and already I'm starting its second companion story. AGH! However, J.K. Rowling's characters are in good hands by now, so I hope everyone enjoys this Rena story. But to reach the present, one must glance at the past, where our story begins… READ & REVIEW!!!
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The Eleventh Wax
Somehow Remus managed to make it through the rest of the break without seeing any more disappointment wrinkle Tonks's face. It seemed like the break would never be over, but then Remus was packing his things back up and hugging Tonks goodbye.
"I'll keep you informed about the baby," Tonks said, "but you need to stay in touch, too." She patted his cheek and kissed him. "See you, Remus."
He nodded and hugged her once more before stepping outside. But as soon as the door closed behind him, he half-frowned. Interesting, he considered, how different those words sound coming from Dora. The wizard shook it off, though, as he poofed back to Hogwarts.
And so he began the long walk up to the school, and the rest of the teachers and students returned for the traipse or the journey via Floo Network in the next few days. It was finally January, a new month, and a new year.
With new problems, but of course.
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January was a busy time, with everyone focusing on exams. Even the teachers were focused on stricter regiments in order to prepare the students for O.W.L.s and N.E.W.T.s. The stress was building, and tensions were mounting.
Remus wished Luna would drop by soon. It was the last week in January, and he had seen hide nor hair of the lovely curiosity. Considering what awaited her in the forest and that she seemed to believe in her sort-of immortality, he couldn't help but fret.
Where was she?
He was damn near tempted to ask Neville if the boy had seen the witch, but he obviously refrained. Something occurred to him in all his solitude: Had Luna shied away from Neville at the Weasleys' party simply because she was –Remus admitted –flirting with Remus? Or was it something more? And was that why he hadn't seen her?
The wizard heaved a melancholy sigh on the first day of February. It had snowed again the night before, so a fresh blanket of flakes covered the ground. They crunched under his shoes as he walked to the bridge. His robes swayed in the soft breeze that caressed him, but he merely shivered at Mother Nature's touch.
There was only one touch he wanted now.
Remus leaned with his hands on the railing. He exhaled, his breath coming out in a few cloud-like puffs. "I thought I knew torture," he muttered to himself.
"Hello, Remus."
He blinked. Was he hearing things now?
"You're perfectly sane," Luna said, closing the gap between them in several strides. "I'm not a figment of the imagination."
She looked to be in perfect health, dressed in jeans, neon blue boot leather boots, and a thick mahogany coat. Her hair was down today, the first time he had seen it as such, but he liked it. "Who's next after your kappa friends?" he asked with a teasing smirk.
Luna stood next to him, her eyes sliding a look at him. "Maybe those mischievous, mysterious winter elves."
His cheeks flushed and he frowned at her. Tease, he thought, but he didn't say it aloud. "Thanks for the Spectrespecs, by the way," he said, changing the subject.
Her familiar smile graced her features, and he felt like things were back to normal. "Of course, Remus. Actually…" She held up her left wrist, and rosy color filled her cheeks. "I love the bracelet. Thank you, Remus."
"It hasn't turned red yet, has it?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow.
"No," she said, shaking her head. She laughed. "You really are a worrywart."
"I seem to get that a lot." There was an uncomfortable silence that followed, but he couldn't break it. He wondered where she had been all this time.
"Father left on a trip last-minute right before the break," she said, looking out at the mountainous expanse. Her bright eyes were as blue as ever. "He left the holiday edition of the paper in my hands, and I scrambled to get the issue out on New Year's Day." She tucked her chin in and glanced at him. "Since then, I've been catching up on my other articles. It's been a busy time."
He blinked. He needed to be better about displaying his questions on his face, especially around her…
"Have you worn the Spectrespecs yet?" she asked.
"No, I haven't," he admitted. "What did you mean, though, saying it will show me a person whose mind fuzzes around me?"
She cocked her head to the side, a quirky smile playing at her lips. "Now, now, Remus. Answers can't just be handed out willy-nilly. You must work at it yourself first."
He lifted an eyebrow. "I'll keep that in mind." Remus looked around him, wishing that the expanse around them was as free as it seemed. He expressed that wish to Luna.
"It's like I told you before," she reminded him. "It's in your perception of things, Mr. Lupin. If you want to do something, do it. If you want to be free, be free."
"If I feel something, I feel it." He dropped his head, and he looked at the wooden boards supporting them. I love you, he wanted to say, but a lump blocked that confession, so he instead confessed another truth. "I feel boxed in, Miss Lovegood."
Luna didn't smile then, and she looked at him with concern in her eyes, though he wasn't looking up at her. Could he really be feeling trapped in the weight of his personal life? She hated that he felt that way, and she wished she could do something for him –anything –while at the same time hoping she was not trapping him as well. She reached out and covered his hand with hers. "Everything may work out for the best," she offered, but she sincerely meant it.
He saw that sincerity in her eyes, and found some solace in it. Remus turned back to her, looking into the distance with her, but closer to her now. "Maybe it will." The wizard slid his eyes to steal another glance at the witch, amused that he met her sideways gaze, too, but neither of them mentioned it –nor did they flinch away. "Maybe it will," he repeated.
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Though it was one small visit, Remus appreciated it greatly. But he wondered how much longer he could hold out before he broke his self-restraint and made his own move on her. Or worse:
He told her he loved her.
Remus pushed that thought to the back of his mind the following week, and the werewolf unleashed a baby banshee on his class of second years. They screamed, of course, and it was amazing that they managed to drown out the banshee's cry.
"Silence!! Quiet down!!!" The Defense Against the Dark Arts professor deeply inhaled. "SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!!" he boomed.
The class miraculously quieted down. The few that had hopped their seats sat down, and the banshee even hovered in awe beside him, not struggling against his grasp. He had their attention once more.
"Banshees aren't that bad when you learn to handle them," Remus said. "In fact, banshees are easier to deal with than boggarts, which you'll handle next year. But-" He paused, feeling like he was being watched, and by someone other than the students. He looked up, not expecting Luna for once. Begrudgingly, he made contact with Sirius's gray eyes. "-you can't just vanquish baby banshees," he finished. He stuffed the creature back into its cage. "Please open to chapter twenty-seven and quietly read until I get back. If you finish, do the questions at the end of the chapter. Those questions are homework, regardless," he added with a wave of his index finger. He steadily made his way to the door and closed it behind him.
When the two D.A.D.A. teachers were alone in the hall, Sirius squinted at his best friend. "We could talk out here, but who knows who'd hear?" he fumed.
Remus fought back an exasperated sigh, and stuck his hands in his pockets instead. That temper was very Sirius.
"My office. Now."
The werewolf followed the black-haired Animagus upstairs to Sirius's office. The ghost of the Bloody Baron drifted by them, but, other than him, they met no one along the way. Remus entered the office first, and Sirius followed. The shorter closed the door behind them, and then Padfoot wheeled on him, fury radiating off him in waves.
"You said you'd tell me back at the castle. Well, we're in the bloody fucking castle."
Remus sighed and sat down in one of the two chairs in front of Sirius's desk, while Sirius dropped himself down in the other and faced the werewolf. "You seem to be ready and willing to rip my throat out," Remus dryly stated.
"That's because of what it looks like, you git! Didn't you see how Tonks and Neville were beside themselves in anguish?!" His next sentence was deflated, as if Sirius was almost ready to give up arguing with anyone anymore. "Remus, Tonks is your wife. Doesn't she mean anything to you?"
Trust me, I've pondered that question a trillion times, Remus thought. He leaned forward with his elbows resting on his knees, his hands clasped together to hide his face. "I love her, Sirius, don't get me wrong. But I've never been in love with Nymphadora."
Sirius was quiet for a moment. "Then why did you marry her?"
Remus almost shook his head, but, no, he knew why. "At the time, her feelings for me were infectious, and I thought maybe I could release myself and fall in love with her. But it never happened." He knew it to be true. "I love her like a dear friend, but nothing more."
"But…why is she pregnant then? You both know magic; it couldn't have just been an accident." He could hear the reprimanding incredulity in Sirius's tone.
"Yes, I know." The werewolf lifted his head, but kept his folded hands in front of his mouth. "I suspect she knew all along that this was one-sided, and she hoped that maybe getting pregnant could keep us together. Always –always –one of us would work the Charms to prevent something like this from happening. On a night more than three months ago, she told me she had already set them in place. Even though something in her voice caught, I trusted her word, and now I know she lied to me and that she's expecting." It was different telling Padfoot the story than sharing the story with Luna, because it didn't feel as strange sharing the details. Probably because Sirius and I are the same age, as opposed to more-than-twenty-years-younger, darling Luna, he guiltily thought. He paused. And Sirius knows Tonks better, as well.
But Sirius was like Luna in that he softened after that information. "So where does Luna come into all of this?"
Remus drew in a sharp breath, feeling the heat in his cheeks rising. So, they had already jumped to Luna. "Dora told me she was pregnant right before Albus approached you and me with our current positions. The following week –before that kind of party at the Burrow before Ginny started her last year –I went to Diagon Alley to stock up on some supplies. I bumped into Neville and Luna on the way, and the three of us shopped together for a bit. Neville had many things to buy, so that left Luna and me standing in the background. We talked about many different things, but we didn't ask about each other's lives." He paused and gazed out the window, reminiscing on that earlier time. "I had never felt so comfortable in my life.
"When I parted from those two that evening, I…felt something. I didn't know what it was, how to describe it, or what it was doing to me. So, I brushed it off." Remus smirked. "How Sirius of me."
"Har, har," Sirius groused.
Remus looked back to his best mate. "I've had several more occasions to talk to her when she's come to work on a story for the Quibbler, and we've grown very comfortable in each other's presence. Unfortunately…," he continued, recalling one bad incident they were quickly approaching on the timeline, "I finally came to realize at the end of October that I was feeling myself fall for her."
Sirius shrugged and half-heartedly smiled. "Well, mate, bad timing, but she's obviously something to have gotten your tail wagging."
The werewolf deepened into crimson, and glared at the wizard.
"Sorry. I meant, 'to have gotten your heart thumping' –or some other organ doing the same. OW! Don't hit me!" he whined when Remus had thumped him Molly Weasley-style upside the head, but he genuinely smiled this time. "It's good you've found your heart, though, Remus."
"Yes, but remember when I said, 'unfortunately'?" The brunette wizard averted his gaze. "The night everyone was busy leaving Hogwarts for Christmas vacation, she had come by to pick up Neville. He was taking too long, so she came to find me. I had my things and I was walking her back downstairs when the staircase moved. She wobbled and fell forward, but the stairs hadn't realigned yet, so if she had truly fallen, she would've been seriously injured or killed."
"But I take it," Sirius interrupted with a wince, "that you're the reason she was safe."
Remus cleared his throat, still red, remembering not only what happened that night, but what had also occurred at the Weasleys' party outside the house. "Uh, exactly… I dropped my bag and dove for her. The stairs had realigned by the time my back had smashed into the bottom step, and we had clonked foreheads…"
"Oh, Merlin's beard. You kissed her?!"
At that point, Remus was utterly bashful, because he was innocent in that case; yes, they had kissed, but that was Luna's lead there. And in the instance at the Weasleys' he was innocent. Maybe not so much with the presents, or the flirting he had done on the bridge, but… "It was an accident, I swear it!! I hadn't meant for it to happen! But, I quickly sobered up and went to move when she just held on tighter to me. Of course, then I heard someone step behind us, and there was Neville. I don't know if he saw us kiss, but it was awkward enough with her on top of me. She didn't look at my face as Neville helped her up and she told him I had saved her. Neville wished me a 'Happy Christmas', and then they left." Remus held his head in his hand, shoulders hunched, and sighed. "I hadn't meant for any of this to turn out the way it has. I hadn't even meant to develop feelings for her! Friends, okay; anything more… Merlin…"
His best mate was quiet, and Remus looked up to find Sirius has pursed his lips. "Remus," he began, "I've been reading a lot of books lately…"
"That's new."
"Shut up. Besides, I think I have something you might want to hear."
The were brightened at the prospect. Maybe this was light at the end of the tunnel? "What?" he urged.
"There's this old French proverb that goes, 'Love is friendship set on fire.'"
Remus's heart jumped into his throat, but he didn't want to admit to Sirius that that described the werewolf and Luna exactly, perfectly. So instead, he did the next best thing and broke out his wand. "Silencio!" Remus stood and glowered at his best mate as Sirius fumbled with the spell. "Do you take anything seriously?!"
"Ha! You wouldn't know just how much of your story I can empathize with!!" Sirius stated. "I'm not as dumb as a troll, you git."
Btu Remus ignored his last comment and narrowed his eyes at the Animagus. "How can you empathize? You're not involved with anyone; you've been busy." Although, as he said it, he dwelled on his words. He hadn't spent much time with Sirius lately, so there was that possibility…wasn't there?
Sirius dodged the question. "Don't you have a class to return to?"
The brunette wizard felt like he had been hit with a Confundus Charm. He went to run to the door, but Padfoot grabbed his shoulder, much like he had done when they had left the Burrow on Christmas Eve, and Remus feared what Sirius would do next. Agh! he internally screamed. Don't punch me now!
Amazingly, Sirius didn't. "Who knows?" he thought aloud. "Everything may work out for the best."
Remus was surprised, and a little spooked, to hear Luna's exact words come out of Sirius's mouth. Despite that, he grinned. "Maybe…" he agreed, as he had with Luna. He parted from his best mate, but when he reached the door, he turned around as he paused over the threshold. "Don't go spilling my life's story now!" he called back with raised eyebrows.
"Oh, don't worry!" the other D.A.D.A. teacher assured him. "I'm only going to tell G-Peeves!!"
The were left, although he was skeptical at Sirius's little stutter. He ignored it, though, and returned to his class. The class ended easily enough, but Remus had one thing in mind: If he wanted to do something, he knew he should do it. Everything may work out for the best, but maybe I should take things into my own hands to get them there first.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe the moment is here!!!! Okay, okay… *inhales deeply* Things have finally reached the point in the stories that I like to write best, so you HAVE TO READ AND REVIEW CHAPTER 12!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Which, by the way, begins the new arc, dubbed 'harvests'. Please look forward to it, and in the mean time, REVIEW!!!!!!! Oh, and you can take a look at In the Present's companion stories, too.
I WON'T DISAPPOINT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-mew-tsubaki :)
