Chapter 34: Perfect Retribution
The next day in the hotel room, Rochelle quietly packed her bags trying not to wake Dave up. Then Dave suddenly woke up and realized that Rochelle wasn't in the bed and saw her packing her suitcase.
"Rochelle?" Dave said and Rochelle turned her head. "Were you just gonna leave without saying bye?"
"It's more like kissing you goodbye," Rochelle said with a little smile on her face, "when you're still sleeping."
"You still don't wanna talk about last night?"
"It's just……too hard to talk about it and……like I said, if I talk about it, I'll end up saying something I'll later regret."
"I understand."
"I gotta go."
Then Rochelle zipped up suitcase and grabbed her other bags and she walked over to Dave in the bed and kissed him.
"I'll call you when I get to Philadelphia," Rochelle said.
"Okay," Dave said.
Then Rochelle left the hotel room and Dave held his head down knowing that if he mentioned one word of what happened on RAW last night, Rochelle would have a nervous breakdown.
Later, Smackdown was on in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and it was time for MVP's VIP Lounge.
"You see the setup, you know the drill," MVP said. "Once again, MVP is in the ring so that can only mean one thing: big things poppin', little things stoppin'. So all of you just sit back, relax, and enjoy the view because it's all up in here in this VIP Lounge. It's for people like me, people that are better than you." Then the crowd booed. "There you go, hatin', hatin' me, hatin' my clothes, hatin' my luxurious hairdo, like it's not luxurious when you know it. Dig this, we're doin' it big up here in the VIP Lounge tonight. And while I'm not a pimp named Slick Back, I am a cornrow-wearing, sidewalk-fairing, bottle-poppin' jawdropping modern mack and your host of the VIP Lounge. My guest is arguably the most controversial guest I've ever had up in my VIP Lounge. His very name causes both men and women to scream like little kids. He is a four-time Intercontinental Champion and a seven-time Tag Team Champion, some people call him the Charismatic Enigma, but you all know him as Jeff Hardy."
Jeff's entrance theme played and he comes out from the curtain with Brittany following him. Brittany was wearing a black see-through midriff top, pink and black zebra print bustier, black plaid miniskirt, black net stocking, black boots, and her hair straight. Jeff did his usual bump and grind with Brittany and the two walked down the ramp slapping the hands of the fans and got into the ring. Brittany posed with Jeff and he got on the turnbuckles and raised his arms in the air. Then he got back down and grabbed a microphone.
"First things first, Jeff," MVP said, "let me welcome you to Smackdown. And let me welcome you to the VIP Lounge because I know they ain't doing big it like this over on RAW, so welcome back to the big leagues, baby boy. Now let's get onto business. Tonight, you will be competing in the Biggest Block Party of the Summer Battle Royal against the likes of Mr. Kennedy, the Samoan Bulldozer Umaga, the Great Khali, the Big Show for an opportunity to face Triple H for the WWE Championship at Summerslam. Unfortunately for you though, the odds on favorite to win the battle royal is the one individual whose name I didn't mention and that individual would be yours truly."
"Whoo, you, the odds on favorite?" Jeff said.
"You know it. Come on, man. It's me."
"Man, I haven't seen you win a match since you lost the U.S. Title to my brother."
"You see, I invited you as a guest up in the VIP Lounge and you wanna come at me like that? Look, this has gotta be a huge year for you, right? You're competing for an opportunity to face Triple H, you are on the cover of this month's WWE's magazine……" MVP held up the WWE Magazine with Jeff on the cover, "……and you're in the VIP Lounge with me, this gotta be one huge year for you. I mean, ladies and gentlemen, look at this, can you get that? There is Jeff Hardy, dangling, paralessly from a rope with the WWE Championship inches away from his fingers. Now while you are not known for winning the WWE Championship, you are known for a number of other things. For example, being a risk taker, you're the man that's willing to make death-defying leaps from anywhere and everywhere and while those risks have resulted in huge successes for you, some of those risks have also resulted in some pretty big failures as well. One of which you talk about candidly in this issue of WWE Magazine. Wanna elaborate on that?"
"Look, dude, I made a mistake, I paid for it with a 60-day suspension, I missed Wrestlemania, but I think the people respect the fact that I was open and honest about what I did."
"But as I recall, that wasn't the only mistake you made. I mean, you made some other ones, for example, just prior to your suspension, you also lost the Intercontinental Championship, is that correct?"
"Correct."
"And you had another very traumatic situation, your house burned down. It wasn't exactly a house, more like a trailer, but just a saying, it was where you lived. It had all of your personal belongings, your recording studio, your artwork, all of your personal items. What does that feel like? How traumatic is that when you lose your home?"
"Dude, it was horrible, man. You hear stories about people losing their homes on a fire and when it happens to you…..what are trying to do, man?"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on, man, settle down, now wait a minute. This is my VIP Lounge, I ask the questions, not you, alright? What we need to talk about his risk-taking behavior Now, Jeff, you're an emotionally expressive individual. You're an artist and you wear your emotions on your sleeve and I can see that internally you're wrestling with some serious issues of……guilt, maybe? Guilt over the fact that you feel responsible about the fact that your behavior probably cost you the life of your very good friend, your homie, your dog. What was his time name again? Uh, your little dog, uh……"
"Jack."
"Jack, that's right. You feel responsible for Jack's death because of you reckless and irresponsible behavior. You fee that it's your fault."
"Yo, yo, yo, let me get this straight, you're not just a jerk. What are you a psychiatrist?"
"No, Jeff, I'm not a jerk or a psychiatrist. I'm from the streets and I know when somebody's looking and feeling guilty."
"You don't know me, cuz."
"No, no, I know that you're feeling about the fact that your reckless and irresponsible behavior cost you someone very near and dear to you and as a matter of fact, Jeff, we can say that you are ruining your career with your behavior. As a matter of fact, we can go a little further into that, Jeffery. Let's talk about the fact that you are reckless and you are a detriment to everybody around you: your friends, your family, your girlfriend, you are throwing your career down the drain and it's because of that Jeff, that you will never, ever be WWE Champion. Never. No, no, you know what it is, Jeff? Unlike these people, I don't believe that quote, what was it you said, 'I will never be suspended again?'"
"You know what? I won't. I'll be released."
"You see, that's what I'm talking about. That laissez-faire attitude right there. 'I'll be released.' You see, you don't care about your career, you don't care about these people because you wanna do whatever Jeff wants to do and you know what? That's fine because if you wanna throw your career away, it's gonna happen and you won't have anybody to blame but yourself; but you need to wake up and look in the mirror, you need to realize that you're a professional and you need to start acting like a professional. But more than that, you're a grown man and you need to come to terms with your issues and accept responsibility for your actions and I know that this whole thing is gotta be burning you up inside."
"Hey, man, I am very thankful that I have a second chance and if anybody should know about second chances, it's you. And you're right, what you just said to me, it does burn me up inside."
"Settle down, man, you don't gotta be so hot up in here now."
Then Jeff then shoved MVP down and kicked him out of the ring and Jeff shouted down at MVP "You make me sick" as MVP walked away. Brittany was covering her mouth the whole time as she saw a side of Jeff she had never seen before but at the same time was hurt by the comments MVP brought up.
Then it was time for the match between Shelton Benjamin and Jimmy Wang Yang.
Then Shelton's entrance theme played and the pyro went off as he came out from the curtain with the United States Championship belt around his waist. Shelton walked down the ramp and leaped into the ring and then he got on the turnbuckle and raised his U.S. Title belt in the air. Shelton got back down and asked for a microphone from Justin.
"Last Sunday at the Great American Bash," Shelton said, "I did exactly what I said I was going to do because last Sunday, I hit the motherload when I liberated the United States Title from Matt Hardy. So now not only am I the Gold Standard in the WWE, I am also the United States……wait a minute……I am also the new United States Champion. And like I said time and time and time and time again, there ain't no stoppin' me now!"
Then Jimmy Wang Yang's entrance theme played and he came out from the curtain doing his little two-step. Then he walked down the ramp slapping the hands of the fans and as he got on the ring steps, he threw his cowboy hat to the crowd and got into the ring and then the referee called for the bell.
Shelton and Jimmy circled around the ring and they locked up before Shelton got a belly-to-belly suplex to Jimmy and he still held onto Jimmy as he got a snap suplex. Then Shelton whipped Jimmy to the ropes and got a kick to the face and covered for a two count. Then Shelton grabbed Jimmy's arm and got some kneedrops to the head and got Jimmy in a camel clutch before he let go and then Shelton shoved Jimmy to the corner and got a right hand to the face before a break.
Then Shelton grabbed Jimmy and Jimmy went to kick Shelton but Shelton grabbed his leg and Jimmy got an enziguri before he got a right hand and a kick to the side and Jimmy went to whip Shelton but Shelton reversed and Jimmy got a flying headscissors. Then Jimmy kicked Shelton in the midsection and got some right hands before he whipped Shelton to the corner and went for a monkey flip but Shelton blocked and droved Jimmy to the corner.
Then Shelton went after Jimmy but Jimmy kicked Shelton in the midsection and climbed on the turnbuckle but Shelton threw him off and went to kick Jimmy but Jimmy grabbed his leg and Shelton missed a spinning kick and so did Jimmy and Shelton got a DDT on Jimmy and scored the three count
Then Shelton's arm was raised by the referee as he gave him the U.S. Championship belt and then Delancey's entrance theme played and she came out from the curtain with Ulysses following her. Delancey was wearing a black low v-neckline halter jumpsuit with a zebra print bandeau and her hair curled.
"Hey, Shelton," Delancey said, "maybe you weren't getting it quite clearly. I was hoping you learned your lesson but after last night, I thought I should……give you another lesson……meaning Ulysses."
Then Delancey and Ulysses walked down the ramp as Shelton dropped his title belt and as Ulysses got into the ring, Shelton was hitting Ulysses to no avail and Ulysses shoved Shelton down. Then Shelton went after Ulysses again but Ulysses grabbed him and nailed the Trojan Horse.
Delancey got into the ring applauding and then she smiled at Shelton lying down on the ground and raised Ulysses' arm in the air as Smackdown went to a commercial break.
A little later, "Eddie's Angels" were tiptoeing through the hallway because they heard from Destiny of the Angelic Coalition that Edge and Alicia Fox were together and then the Angels went to find out for themselves as they found them in a secluded corner.
"What were you thinking?" Edge said. "Okay, just bare with me, okay? Look, you need to blend in into the woodwork, okay?"
"Okay, but……I am blending in," Alicia said.
"Okay, okay, just listen to me, okay? Why don't we talk about this later back at the hotel, okay? Vickie could be here any minute, okay?"
"Okay."
"Okay, I promise."
What Edge and Alicia didn't know that Bam Neely was shown listening in the background and he walked away.
"What did I tell you?" Nicole said. "Edge is a dog."
"He's still talking to Alicia Fox and is still a cheater," Delancey said. "I don't think he's guilty of that and he'll probably 'apologize' to Vickie sometime later tonight."
"Which I think is nothing," Rochelle said. "I mean, after last Sunday, he's gonna have a huge explanation for everything. Maybe not."
"Like what?" Nicole said.
"He's probably gonna have a five, maybe ten speech saying 'I'm sorry' and blah, blah, blah, everything's gonna be bullshit. I know."
"Come on, let's go," Delancey said.
Then the Angels walked away.
A little later, it was time for the Biggest Block Party of the Summer Battle Royal which Jeff, Mr. Kennedy, Umaga, the Great Khali, the Big Show, and MVP for the number one contender shot at the WWE Championship at Summerslam. Every man made their way to the ring as the referee called for the bell.
Jeff immediately went after MVP and MVP bailed out of the ring as Big Show attacked Umaga in the corner and Mr. Kennedy went to work on Khali and Jeff joined him in the attack as MVP got back in the ring. Big Show went after MVP but MVP begged for mercy as Umaga went on the offensive with right hands on Big Show as Mr. Kennedy got a clothesline on Khali and Mr. Kennedy got on all fours as Jeff kicked MVP in the head as he escaped. Then Jeff stepped on Mr. Kennedy as he landed a dropkick on Khali and they went to eliminate him but Khali threw both men off and Mr. Kennedy kicked Khali in the midsection and they went to whip Khali but Khali blocked and got a double clothesline. Then MVP got a right hand to Khali but Khali got a big chop to the head and then Big Show gave Umaga a sidewalk slam.
Then Khali grabbed Big Show headbutted him and Big Show fought back with a forehead of his own and Khali got another one as Umaga got a superkick to both Big Show and Khali. They headbutted each other and Umaga kicked Big Show and Khali both to the mat and then yelled as Jeff landed the Whisper in the Wind on Umaga and Mr. Kennedy kicked Umaga and went after Big Show with a right hand and a kick as MVP got a clothesline and Big Show got a headbutt to Mr. Kennedy as MVP punched away at Jeff. Then Big Shot got an elbow to Khali and a couple of knees to the midsection and the battle royal continued on as MVP tried to eliminate Jeff but Jeff kept hanging onto the ropes and got some huge right hands to the head and kicked him to the gut in the corner and he went to whip MVP but MVP blocked and hit a back elbow sending Jeff to the corner.
Then Big Show headbutted Umaga and got some right hands on Khali as Jeff eventually got some retribution when he clotheslined MVP over the top rope to the floor. Umaga tossed Jeff over the top rope, but Jeff held onto the top rope and pulled himself back into the ring. Show and Umaga had a staredown slapped each other on the chest hard. Big Show got the advantage as Umaga bounced off the ropes and ran into Big Show's shouldertackle and Big Show got a clothesline sending Umaga over the top to the floor. Mr. Kennedy and Jeff went after Big Show together with punches and Big Show fended Mr. Kennedy off as he put Jeff in a cobra clutch before landing a kick to Mr. Kennedy and then tossed him hard to the mat.
Then Big Show grabbed Mr. Kennedy and Mr. Kennedy punched away at Big Show and then Mr. Kennedy bounced off the rope and Big Show choked him and Big Show blocked him and then powered him over the top rope to the floor. That left Khali, Big Show, & Jeff and Khali knocked Big Show to the mat with punches and a big chop to the head and Jeff crawled his way back into the ring as Khali grabbed Big Show by the neck and Big Show gave Khali a chokeslam. Umaga returned to the ring and gave Big Show an illegal Samoan Spike and Jeff surprised Big Show with a dive off the top rope but Big Show caught Jeff in powerbomb position and attempted to toss Jeff over the top rope, but Jeff turned and headscissored Big Show over the top rope to the floor.
Jeff climbed the top turnbuckle and went for a Swanton Bomb on Khali next and got and Jeff pulled off his shirt and went after Khali with kicks and went to eliminate Khali but Khali got a back elbow. Khali squeezed Jeff's head and Jeff low kicked out of it and got a few right hands before Khali threw him off and then chopped Jeff in the head and tossed him over the top rope.
The Great Khali won and then Brittany ran over to Jeff and cradled him knowing this wasn't a good night for him. First, MVP berated Jeff about his recent actions and now Jeff wasn't the number one contender for the WWE Championship. What next happened to be question lingering through Brittany's head.
Later, it was time for the Divas' tag team match which was Christina Alexis and Jasmine Morgan of the Angelic Coalition versus Natalya and Victoria. Natalya's entrance theme played and she came out from the curtain with Victoria following her.
"The following Divas' tag team match is scheduled for one fall," Justin Roberts announced. "Introducing first, the team of Victoria and Natalya."
Natalya and Victoria gave each other a double high five and they walked down the ramp and got into the ring. Natalya climbed on the apron onto the turnbuckle and flipped her hair backwards looking around at the crowd and got back down. Then Jasmine's entrance theme, "Crushcrushcrush" by Paramore, played and she came out from the curtain.
"And their opponents first representing the Angelic Coalition from Tallahassee, Florida, Jasmine Morgan," Justin announced.
Jasmine was wearing a black short-sleeved midriff top with a picture of Jack Skellington from The Nightmare Before Christmas, black boyshorts, black net stockings, black leg warmers, black hand warmers, and her hair straight. Jasmine walked down the ramp slapping the hands of the fans and then she jumped on the apron, bounced off the bottom rope, and entered through the bottom and middle rope. Then Jasmine twirled around and posed in the middle of the ring and stared at Natalya and Victoria with a smile on her face as Christina's entrance theme "Count On It," which was Beth Phoenix's old entrance theme, played and she came out from the curtain.
"And her tag team partner representing the Angelic Coalition from Houston, Texas, Christina Alexis," Justin announced.
Christina was wearing a blue and black lace bustier, black pants, black lace warmers, and her hair curled. Christina walked down the ramp, went around the ring, got on the apron, posed raising her arms in the air. Then she got into the ring and stared at Natalya and Victoria as she gave Jasmine a high five and Christina & Victoria left the ring as the referee called for the bell.
Natalya and Jasmine start off the match as they locked up and Jasmine twists Natalya's arm and Natalya reverses the hold and so does Jasmine. Natalya elbows Jasmine in the head and then she drags Jasmine to the bottom rope and used the ropes for momentum as she chokes Jasmine on the bottom rope. Then Natalya grabs Jasmine by the hair but Jasmine fights back with forearms to the face and Jasmine bounces off the ropes and takes Natalya down with a boot to the head for a one count.
Jasmine twists Natalya's arm again and then tags in Christina and Christina kicks Natalya's midsection and she & Jasmine suplex Natalya and Christina goes for the cover on Natalya for a two count. Christina grabs Natalya for a scoop slam and goes for a bridge but Natalya escapes and Natalya gets a right hand to Christina in the midsection and pushes her down on the mat and Natalya holds Christina as she tries to get to the corner and Natalya continues holding Christina down as she tags in Victoria.
Victoria grabs Christina as Natalya lets go of her and Victoria throws Christina to the mat to no avail as Christina pops up and then Victoria charges at Christina but Christina gets a drop toe hold and then uses the bottom rope to choke Victoria. Christina drags Victoria by the hair and chokes Victoria with her boot and then Christina gets Victoria on her shoulder and gets a jawbreaker and then she tags in Jasmine. Jasmine kicks Victoria in the back and throws her on the mat but Victoria crawls to the corner to tag in Natalya and Jasmine takes her down with a clothesline, a dropkick, and another clothesline before landing a belly-to-belly suplex.
Jasmine goes for the cover but Victoria breaks the count and then Christina gets into the ring and grabs Victoria by the hair and then she gets Victoria on her shoulders and lands a Samoan drop. Victoria rolls out of the ring as Natalya shoves Christina and the two have a staredown as Jasmine climbs the top turnbuckle and lands a diving hurricanrana on Natalya. Then Christina gets out of the ring as Jasmine lands some right hands to Natalya and then kicks her in the midsection before landing her finishing move, the Deadly Rose, a swinging snap DDT, for the win.
"Here are your winners, Christina Alexis and Jasmine Morgan," Justin announced.
Christina gets in the ring and she & Jasmine hug as the referee raised their arms in the air. Then Christina lifts Jasmine and places her on her shoulder as they continue to celebrate their win. Meanwhile, "Eddie's Angels" and Brittany were watching the whole thing from their locker room.
"I'm telling you," Brittany said, "these Divas don't have a chance of beating any member of the Angelic Coalition, especially Christina."
"I'm very impressed with Jasmine, though," Nicole said. "I think she's got some of those high-flying moves like Rey Mysterio. I don't think I've seen a Diva like that."
"Don't be surprised," Delancey said. "You never know what could happen in the WWE."
"Now, it's almost that time for Edge to make his puny little statement," Rochelle said. "Let's go."
Then the Angels and Brittany left their locker room.
Then back at the arena, Edge's entrance theme played and he came out from the curtain. Then he walked down the ramp and got into the ring and he asked for the microphone as the crowd booed.
"I wanted to come out here, I wanted to apologize publicly to my wife, Victoria," Edge said. "My Vickie, my baby Vickie, I didn't wanna just apologize in public, I wanted to……I wanted to apologize face-to-face in public face-to-face. So Vickie……Vickie……please come out here." Then Vickie wouldn't come out. 'Vickie, come on, please, come on out."
Then Vickie came out from the curtain with Chavo Guerrero and Bam Neely following her. Chavo was wheeling Vickie down the ramp and Vickie got out of her wheelchair and was led inside the ring by Chavo and Bam followed bringing the wheelchair. Then Vickie sat back down on the wheelchair as she told Chavo and Bam that she can be alone with Edge. Then Chavo and Bam left the ring and after a long silence, Edge got down on one knee in front of her.
"Vickie, please, hear me out, okay?" Edge said. "I know…….I know that what I did was horrible. I mean, it was really, really horrible. I know that, I understand. I understand if you can't find it in your heart to forgive me, but please just hear me out. What that video……what it didn't show was how many times I tried to say no; but Vickie, she was……she was so aggressive. She just kept coming onto me, she wouldn't take no for an answer. No means no, but she wouldn't listen. Listen, I know the question that's running through your head is, okay, why didn't I just leave. Why didn't I leave, right? Okay, but this is what was going in my mind. I wanted to hammer out......I wanted to iron out the wedding plans. I wanted to make sure everything that went perfect. I knew how important the wedding was to you and to me and I wanted to make sure that the day, that our day, went without a hitch that everything was perfect because nothing means more to me but your happiness. Nothing means more to me but than your love. And Vickie, I won't live without your love. I can't, I can't live without your love."
Then "Eddie's Angels'" entrance theme played and they came out from the curtain. Nicole was wearing a zebra print spaghetti strap tank, black jeans, and her hair curled and Rochelle was wearing a black low v-neckline halter mini dress with a zebra print bandeau and her hair curled.
"Wow, what a theatrical performance," Delancey said onto the microphone. "Edge, stop being so melodramatic. Everything you just said was bull. You don't love Vickie because all you want is the WWE Championship and that's why you're just using Vickie and Vickie was too stupid to realize it. You never cared about the wedding, you didn't want to leave the hotel room at all. You were flirting with the wedding planner and that didn't look like she was 'aggressive.' In fact, you were talking to her a little while ago and before the Great American Bash, it's true, Vickie. We saw them and Edge, we saw Bam seeing to talking to Alicia and I'm sure Bam told Vickie. You can't lie your way out of this out of anything, Edge, and Vickie, if you end up believing this guy, you're the one who's gonna end up looking like a fool."
"Baby, baby, please," Edge said. "Don't listen to them. Please, everything I said was from the bottom of my heart. I meant every word. 'Eddie's Angels,' they don't understand anything and they won't. Please, please."
Then Vickie broke into a smile and said,
"Oh, baby, I understand. I do understand."
Then Edge and Vickie hugged and Edge smiled and he moved in for a kiss but Vickie turned away as if he had garlic breath.
"But you need to understand that hell hath no fury over a woman scorned," Vickie said as Edge looked worried. "When I was really, really, really mad at you, I did something that you might not like."
"Um, okay, okay, I understand that," Edge said. "I understand that. I understand, What…… what did you do."
"I reinstated the Undertaker."
Then the crowd cheered loudly and "Eddie's Angels" smiled and applauded as Edge grabbed his hair nervously and bit his finger and squinted as the crowd chanted, "Undertaker!" and clapped.
"Uh……uh……okay, okay, alright…….you're a businesswoman, this is a business, that's good business," Edge said. "And uh…..oh boy.....um…..besides, we can go on our honeymoon, we can go on our honeymoon and the Undertaker & Triple H, they can destroy each other. We'll come back from the honeymoon, I'll pick the bones, and whoever wins, I'll take back my WWE Championship."
"That sounds great and all," Vickie said, "but, baby, I've already scheduled an opponent to face the Undertaker at Summerslam.
"Uh, okay, um, who?'
"You!"
The crowd cheered again as Edge stood up and he walked back and forth in the ring and hit his forehead with the microphone a few times and biting his hand.
"Baby, you can't mean that," Edge said as he kneeled in front of Vickie. " You don't mean it. You can't mean that, right?"
"Oh baby, I do mean it," Vickie said, "and it will be……Hell in a Cell."
Then Vickie broke into laughter as Edge fell back onto the mat and got bug-eyed.
"And you have the complete nerve to screw my best friend's husband and her best friend when you should've known that before you got married, Edge has cheated on me," Delancey said. "You know what? 'Eddie's Angels' need a break from this because we have some personal issues to deal with on RAW and you two need to work something out amongst yourselves, okay? We will see you at Summerslam."
Then "Eddie's Angels" walked to the back as Edge continued getting bug-eyed and worried as Vickie kept a smile on her face. The Angels did need a break from Smackdown because two of them did have a personal issue to deal with on RAW: John Cena and Batista.
