AN: I am so sorry for taking so long to update. My daughter was in the hospital up here in Seattle and was very ill. She had a severe infection that made it to where she wasn't able to breath independently and was not doing well. She's fine now but it was a very scary time. She got out in time to watch her brother go trick or treating and is finally able to return to school. I'm hoping to be able to update a little more frequently now that things are stabilized.

I hope this chapter us ok. I'm sorry for the frequent POV changes and hope it makes sense. I'm still not fully back to my self with regards to writing but I knew I had to do something even if it is short. :)

please read and review. It totally makes my day!

Tishbing

Chapter Three

Jamie pulled herself out of bed, her stomach rolling. Frowning, she made a mental note to talk to Scotty about the inertial dampeners being checked. She'd been asking him for the past two and a half months to check them but his answer was always the same. That they were within specs. Something wasn't right. She'd never had space sickness before and there shouldn't damn well be a reason for it now!

Dragging herself to the bathroom, she was thankful she hadn't thrown up this morning but she was pretty close. The sight in the mirror looked more like a sickly, pale ghost than her usual self. The dark circles under her eyes were getting harder to hide and Jamie was sure Bones was going notice soon. She hated going to see him as a patient. Ever since the warp core incident (she refused to think of it as her death), he'd always been a little more paranoid about her and it drove her a little nuts. She gave a sigh and got ready for the day, making doubly sure to add a touch more concealer than she usually wore.

Things between her and Spock had been even more strained and he'd taken to avoiding her. The few interactions they'd had had been uncomfortable to say the least. He seemed almost...jumpy. It still didn't stop him from commenting on her appearance and when she was behind on her reports.

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

"Captain? Are you well?"

Jamie frowned slightly as a wave of nausea made itself known and clamped her mouth shut against it. She gave a curt nod and the deck tilted precariously.

"Captain?"

Spock's voice seemed to be coming from far away. She heard a whirring next to her ear and clumsily swiped at it before her hand was grabbed and pulled down. Jamie felt a sting on the side of her neck and jerked in surprise and slowly her senses started coming back.

McCoy's concerned face was inches from her own and she snapped back, wincing when her neck twinged.

"What happened?" Jamie mumbled. She frowned and looked around, noticing that Spock was watching her with a matching frown. Jamie turned and noticed that her hand was still being gripped tightly. Uhura was kneeling next to her chair and holding her tightly, her face a paler hue than what was normal.

"I'm not sure, Jim. I need you to come down to medical." He said tersely. His lips were pressed into a thin line and she knew that he was barely holding in to his anger and was probably going to lay in on her once they reached the relative privacy of the medical bay.

"Bones, I-" She started to protest but a glare from her friend shut her down. McCoy's strong hand gripped her bicep and easily pulled her up. It was simultaneously support and warning. Uhura reluctantly relinquished her grip on Jim's hand while Spock watched her with dark eyes.

"You have the conn, Mr. Spock." Jim said as McCoy steered her into the lift.

ooooooooooooooooooooooooiooooooo

A full exam and what felt like liters of blood later, McCoy was still puzzled. He was scowling at his PADD as if it had personally offended him and Jamie squirmed on the biobed.

"I just don't get it. From what I can see, you're suffering from a copper deficiency. That'd explain some of the symptoms but not all." He mumbled and then his eyebrows shot up into his hairline.

The sudden change of his demeanor sent a small spike of uneasiness though her. Especially when he grabbed another extractor to draw another blood sample.

"Bones?" Jim growled in warning but, as usual, he ignored her and grabbed her arm to take his sample. He quickly turned and placed the sample into the analyzer and tapped in a few commands. The silence between them was uncomfortable while he and Jamie waited. A ping from the computer and a green positive sign made her sigh in relief. At least there was an answer. McCoy turned back to her and his face tore that relief from Jamie. A trickle of fear race up her spine as McCoy looked utterly speechless.

"What?" She asked.

McCoy shook his head and placed a hand on her arm.

"Jim, you're pregnant."

Her world felt like it was tilting on it's axis. It wasn't possible. Bones had told her that it wasn't possible. The radiation from the warp core had effectively sterilized her and she received bi-annual birth control shots to stop her from having a cycle as a secondary precaution.

"That's not..." She uttered and stopped. Trelane's words came back to her. "Now-as I was saying, you-Jamie Kirk, are about to get a night of what you fantasized about and then some."

Her mouth suddenly went dry and her heart started to beat frantically against her ribs. Alarms started ringing as Jamie's breathing became panicked.

"Jim! Jamie! You need to calm down!" McCoy gripped her and wrenched her forward to where he was inches away from her. She jerked out of his grasp and quickly shot off the biobed. Her panic quickly turned to anger and disgust.

"Trelane. You bastard!" She was facing away from McCoy, fists clenched and body tense when Bones came up next to her. His arms were crossed and he was staring at Jim with a shrewd, calculating glare.

"How long have been having symptoms?" He asked and a small stab of guilt pierced through her anger.

"A while." She admitted. McCoy's face turned a ruddy red.

"God damn it! You need to tell me everything right now!" McCoy demanded.

Jamie's shoulders slumped in defeat and she quickly told him everything. Trelane and his twisted sense of obligation, the forced pon farr...everything. By the end of the tale, McCoy's face had turned white with a mix of anger and horror.

"I'd heard about this Vulcan mating drive in med school...mostly rumors and some jokes but...there was nothing in your report." McCoy fixed Jim with a worried gaze. "You both were manipulated by an alien entity and you were raped. Your bodies were manipulated on a should have been a report."

"I wasn't raped. Spock didn't force me. He held on for as long as possible. We tried to get out and hoped that the Enterprise would find us but..." Jamie swallowed against a lump in her throat and continued. "He was burning up. He was dying just as Trelane had threatened. I couldn't just let him die." Jamie said, pleading for the doctor to understand.

"And you just accommodated him?" McCoy growled.

"Yes! I had to!" She snapped. "You can't understand. He was suffering and it wasn't...unpleasant." Now her face felt hot. "And after it was over he let us go. I didn't want to ruin his life and it was just easier to not say anything. To shove it under the rug and forget about it."

McCoy swallowed a retort and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath to calm himself.

"Okay." He pinched the bridge of his nose and ran a hand through his hair. "We need to set up your prenatal exams and get you started on a vitamin and copper supplement regimen."

Jim threw her hands up in panic. "Whoa! I'm not keeping it! I can't. Uhura will kill me! Spock will kill me. Just...cut it out or give me a shot to get rid of it and Spock will never know."

McCoy's face twisted and Jim could see he felt sick with guilt.

"Jim...I can't. You know I believe in the right of the pregnant individual to make the decision whether or not to terminate - that's part of federation law and I have no problem with that but this baby us part vulcan. They never do abortions and certainly not now. You know about the new laws regarding preserving the Vulcan species. I can't abort unless Spock consents. I'm sorry but he has to know."

Jim felt like she was on a roller coaster. Her emotions flip flopping.

"You can't be serious?" She said incrediously. McCoy nodded solemnly.

"Jamie, I'm your friend and your doctor but I'm also a Starfleet officer sworn to uphold the law. He has to be told especially if you want to terminate."

Jamie was angry and scared at the same time, her emotions warring with one another but she knew what Spock was going to say. There was no way he was going to want this mistake. She pulled on her clothes while she waited for Spock to come down after his summons from Dr. McCoy. It was while she was putting on her boots that she remembered more of Trelane's cryptic words.

"Well now, my dear. I must say you turned out quite nice."

"I'm sad to say that our meeting was...less than cordial. Now that I am older and wiser I have been working to make amends since you were conceived."

His words floated back to her and she realized that Trelane had done more than just mess with her reproductive organs. She had been male in that other timeline. She should have been male in this one, too. Trelane had planned this from the beginning. From before she had even been born. It made her feel sick.

The swish of the doors to the exam room pulled her from her thoughts. Spock was eyeing her warily and McCoy explained to Spock the results of Jim's tests. His features became more closed off as the doctor told him of the pregnancy and that Jim's hormone levels indicated that she was approximately twelve weeks along. His eyes darted to her and for a moment she thought she saw a glimmer of possessiveness but it was quickly hidden under Vulcan control. McCoy finished and Spock looked at Jim thoughtfully.

"Vulcan males are...especially fertile during their time. They release hormones to trigger their mate's ovulation to increase the chances of conception."

McCoy and Jim both rolled their eyes. "That's all you have to say?" McCoy asked increduously. Jim stepped forward.

"Look, Spock, just tell Bones he has your permission to start the procedure to terminate and that will be that." Jim crossed her arms defensively and felt her stomach drop when Spock shook his head.

"No, captain. I cannot allow you to abort my child." He replied.

"Your child! I'm the one doing all the work! You can't be serious?" Jim gaped and sagged against the wall.

"What about Uhura?" She tried. She felt like her world was crumbling around her. Spock tensed at Uhura's name and his eyes grew dark but he was determined.

"From the moment this child was conceived it was a life. A Vulcan life. My child must come to birth. She will understand." Spock turned to the doctor, giving Jim no further acknowledgement than an insect.

"I must return to my duties. If my presence is no longer required?" It wasn't really a question and he left.

McCoy looked back at Jim with sympathy. "I'm sorry, Jim. There's nothing I can do."

Jim wanted to punch McCoy and Spock both. She fixed him with a withering glare. "Fuck you, Bones." She spat acidly and turned on her heel to go to her quarters. Once inside, she curled up in her bed. Wrapping her arms around her stomach where she knew a tiny passenger now lurked, ready to tear her world apart. She cried and cursed her way into a fitful sleep, angry at Spock and McCoy but mostly at Trelane for his meddling.

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Spock left the medbay, his thoughts spinning in his head. He had noticed a change in the captain's scent and her behavior had been different as of late but he had never expected this. He knew that the time for truths was upon him. He had to tell Nyota. He needed to think about his options.

A quick check of the time confirmed that Nyota's and his shift was coming to an end. He made his way to the bridge to meet her and once he exited the turbolift, he was immediately bombarded with questions about the captain's well-being. Chekov, Sulu and Uhura were in front if him with concerned looks.

"The captain is suffering from anemia. She will be well enough to return to duty soon." He explained. It was a partial truth but one that was suitable for public information.

Lt. Sulu stepped forward. "Is it because of the transfusion?"

"Negative. The doctor assures me that she is well."

His statement is vague and Spock can see Chekov frowning as he picks apart the sentences to determine a deeper meaning. They would have to be told eventually but now is not the time. The two men leave, clearly upset at the lack of information. Spock waits for the second lift to ensure that he and Nyota are alone.

Nyota's eyes narrow in suspicion as they descend to the lower levels. She watches him and waits until they reach the privacy of her cabin. The second the door closed she spun around with her arms crossed.

"Okay. What's going on? You've been off for weeks and now you look like..." She throws up her hands in frustration and shakes her head. "I just don't know, Spock!"

"Perhaps you should have a seat."

Nyota's face darkens in suspicion but she slowly sits on her bed. Spock takes a seat next to her and shifts his body so he can look into her eyes.

"Pon Farr."

He had finally had the courage to speak with her about the shameful affliction a month ago. Nyota's response had been...off putting, to put it mildly but she had accepted it.

Her head tilted in confusion at his statement and he took a deep breath to elaborate.

"Approximately ten weeks ago the entity we know as Trelane abducted the captain and myself."

Nyota nodded. She knew this already. They had only been missing for five minutes.

"We were taken to an unknown location and held there for more than a day where the creature forced my time upon me."

Spock's voice remained steady even as Uhura gasped in horrified realization.

"I attempted to hold out but it was clear that Trelane had no intention of releasing us unless we played out his fantasy or I had perished from the Plak Tow. The captain reluctantly agreed." He stuck to the bare facts in the hopes that it would be less painful.

"The captain is indeed suffering from a form of anemia but it is more a copper deficiency than an iron one. She is pregnant with my child."

Spock waited a beat before Nyota was able to speak. Her hands were trembling, eyes wide with hurt and horror. It was a disheartening sight. Spock knew that this incident would have come to light eventually but he had believed, as had the captain, that it would have been years from now.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She whispered. A surge of guilt threatened to overcome him.

"We believed that such knowledge would only cause you harm. I am sorry. I do not expect forgiveness." Spock answered just as quietly. Nyota stood and started to pace, her hands wringing each other when she stopped and kneeled in front of him.

"Spock, I'm not going to lie. It does hurt." She gripped his hands and he could feel love pouring out of her, beating against his shields. He didn't understand.

"But having your dead body beamed back aboard would have hurt more."

It was that statement of pure acceptance and understanding that solidified his reasoning for choosing Nyota. He pulled her into his arms and held her.

"Oh my god, Spock. A baby...your baby. What are you going to do?" She mumbled into his neck.

"I do not know. I must consider my options."