Chapter 9
Hermione sat in a chair in the library sipping some tea while waiting for her bound prisoner to come to herself.
"Ugh," the woman muttered as she stirred. Her eyes opened and as the realization that she was bound dawned on her, she turned angry eyes upon her captor.
"Why have you bound me?"
"I couldn't very well take the chance that you would attack me or try to escape now, could I? And don't bother searching for your wand. I have it and won't be giving it back any time soon," Hermione stated calmly.
"What do you want from me?"
"Right now, to talk to you."
"Oh."
The silence lengthened between the two women. Hermione kept her eyes trained on the former classmate in front of her.
"I have to say that you're the least likely person I'd have expected to follow me," she said unexpectedly. "So why have you been?"
"Because I am the least likely suspect. That's why," the woman retorted angrily.
"Come off of it Pansy! We both know that that is just an excuse! I can promise you, answering my questions will be much easier for you than if I have to call in backup! So you may as well tell me the truth. Why have you been following me for the past few months?"
"Because I'm hoping you have something useful that will help him regain his former favor."
"And if I did have something, what could you, Pansy, hope to gain?"
Pansy's eyes dropped away from the other woman's piercing gaze. What could she possibly hope to gain? She was already beginning to regret the whole fiasco of engaging the smartest witch from their year at Hogwarts. A witch who managed more complex things in her years at Hogwarts than most students learned in all their time there.
"His love," she mumbled quietly.
"Excuse me, would you mind repeating what you just said," Hermione asked startled.
"His love," Pansy repeated in a slightly louder voice.
Hermione sat back and contemplated Pansy's statement. The only person to her knowledge that Pansy would go through such great lengths to gain love from was Draco Malfoy. And Hermione had information that Pansy didn't know about regarding Draco. And the crazy woman thought that there was some piece of information that Hermione had in her possession that would bring Draco to his knees and render a confession of undying love.
"Whose love," she asked Pansy softly though with an idea of the other woman's response.
"Draco's. I love him so much and he's so out of favor with everyone that I want to give him something that he can use to his advantage to regain favor," the words tumbled out in a rush and ended on a sob.
Hermione stared at her stunned. In all her years of knowing Pansy Parkinson, this was the first semi-selfless act that she'd seen the girl commit. It didn't matter how twisted it was. It was still self-less, sort of. Of course, being privilege to more information about Draco than Pansy could even imagine, Hermione suddenly realized that Pansy had no idea as to where Draco's loyalties lay now.
"Even if I had some pertinent information --- which I don't --- and gave it to you, what makes you so sure that it would help him to regain favor? Voldemort's been dead for three years. The Death Eaters who weren't killed in the Battle are still being captured and put in Azakbahn. So Draco would be needing to regain the favor of whom?"
"I don't know. I wasn't told. All I was told was that this was a way that he could regain favor."
"Did Draco put you up to this?"
"No! He doesn't know I'm here. He doesn't know anything about this. I've not talked to him in months. And the last time that I spoke with him, he seemed so distant. I recalled the days when he was a favored one of the Dark Lord and that's the Draco I fell in love with. The one who was rich and people feared. Not the shallow shell of a man from the past few years. And that's the Draco I want back. The one that I fell in love with. And so I decided to take it upon myself to help him regain his former glory."
Hermione stared at the other woman, not fully believing what she'd just heard. Pansy actually wanted the Draco who was the bully back as opposed to the man he'd become. She was in love with the idea and the thought of power. In Hermione's mind, those were necessary the qualities to love in someone else.
"Interesting," was the only comment that Hermione allowed to escape her mouth.
"Besides, Granger, everyone knows that it was Potter who defeated the Dark Lord. And everyone knows that you're one of his best mates. And since getting Potter is really the best way for Draco to regain his former glory, I've chosen to follow you. Because if something happens to you, then that means that Potter will come after those who've hurt you. And then, we'll have Potter."
"Pansy you must be insane to even believe such a plan! There are several problems with that and the first is that should something happen to me, it wouldn't be Harry who comes after me. Because Harry is indisposed and has been since the Battle! There is no way that he would be able to come after anyone who harms me. And secondly, I am quite capable of taking care of myself. And because I'm so capable, it's the only reason that I'm sitting here talking to you instead of your being faced with not so pleasant treatment. Now other than me, what are you looking for?"
"Potter's indisposed? Then it would be the Weasel who comes for you."
"Yes, Ron would come for me. Now, this is the last time I'm going to ask you this question – what have you been looking for?"
Pansy eyed the woman pointing her wand at her. She knew that Hermione wasn't afraid to use that wand. Realizing how hopeless her cause was, Pansy said, "For the past year or so, there has been on the rise a new Dark Lord. While I don't know who exactly it is, I can tell you that I was approached about joining with them. I refused for myself but decided that I would do anything to assist Draco in regaining favor. When I tried to talk to him about this idea, he grew very irate and short with me. So I decided I'd do it on my own and then once he's been restored then he would realize how much he loves me and would thank me for it..
"It's not been easy, I can tell you that. I would tail various known Potter supporters, hoping that they would lead me to Potter. Then one day, I happened to look across the street and saw you slipping into this building. I lingered outside that day, watching for you. When you came back the next day and the day after, I knew that there was something here that would cause you to return. I just hoped that you would lead me to Potter. And when that didn't work, I decided to try and bring you instead. After a while, I grew bored with that plan and wanted to see what was interesting to you about this house that you would return to it day in and day out. So I managed to get inside. I knew you'd noticed because the next day, you were more cautious. So once again, I started waiting. And finally, today, I was able to get in again. And I'd only just begun my search when you stunned me. So I have no idea why this house has become your destination each day. Or what you have found.
"There. Now you know all of it."
Hermione smiled to herself. Pansy really didn't know that Draco had switched loyalties. Or that she'd found something of vital importance that would possibly help Harry learn to forgive himself and to live again.
"What are you going to do with me," Pansy asked when the other woman remained silent.
Allowing the silence to build, Hermione thought about her options. She didn't need Pansy following her any more and yet allowing her to be on her own was unthinkable. Especially in light of the not so startling news about a new Dark Lord on the rise. This was certainly information that the Order needed, but Hermione did think that Pansy needed to be interrogated by Order members rather than herself. But what to do with her was the question. Reaching a swift decision, Hermione answered the other woman.
"I'm going to take you with me so that you can be questioned further. The information that you have given me is very interesting and some of it will need to be confirmed by our intelligence. But you should know that I will not harm you. I can't answer for some of my colleagues, but I won't harm you. Once I leave you for questioning, you'll be out of my hands. I have my own assignment to complete and it's not something that can be done with you here. I regret to tell you that your memory will be obliterated of the time that you've spent tracking me. The information that I'm following is too vital to the well-being of certain people that we can't take any chance that you will inadvertently slip something out and place him in danger. Now, Remus and the others will be here soon."
Pansy shrank back in her chair as Hermione finished calmly explaining what was to happen to her. Evidently her hunch was right and Hermione was onto something, but now she'd have no chance of finding out as Remus Lupin and several other known Order members entered the room.
"Well done Hermione. I must say that your plan paid off. You had the situation under control and we were able to monitor you. We'll take her with us for further questioning," Remus said as he and the others entered the room. Allowing the others to secure Pansy and lead her from the room, Remus lingered a moment to speak with his former student.
"Hermione, you've done well," he began. "Do you think that she was the only threat to you or might there have others and that she wasn't acting alone?"
"No, as far as I can tell, she was most definitely acting alone," Hermione replied thoughtfully. "But there's still something. Something that I'm not sure what exactly but I think that it will be the key to everything I've found out."
"Something relating to something that Pansy said or did?"
"No, not at all. I think I was letting my try to see how the journals will help Harry and there's still something I'm missing. Some piece that is still needed."
"I remember my first meeting with Lily. It was on the train to Hogwarts. She was sitting in a compartment crying and I was with these other two girls, sisters if I remember right, and I was so glad to find a compartment that still had room and where I wasn't being looked down on just for being rather poor. She let us join her and she was so sweet. I can see how James was so taken with her from the first. She became my first friend at Hogwarts."
Hermione smiled at Remus and said, "I was just reading about her train ride and sorting. She mentions you and how you and the girls helped her to forget all about leaving her home and family."
"She wrote about the train ride?!"
"Yes she did, and her first days of classes and pretty much everything else."
"Hermione, do you think ---? No wait, I shouldn't even ask! --- It's none of my business, but still."
"Yes, Remus, I will be happy to let you read them. Once I've finished them that is. But once I give them to Harry you do understand that he may not want anyone reading them?"
"Of course! I'm only asking because while I feel that I knew James and Sirius and Peter pretty well because they were my dormmates, I didn't know Lily as well as I'd have hoped to. And besides, it may help me bring closure to the senseless deaths I've seen. Hers. James's. Sirius's. Dubmledore's. Fred's. Mad-Eye's. Even Severus's."
"And your wife's," Hermione asked softly recognizing just whose name he left off the list and watching her friend closely as she brought it up.
With tears filling his eyes, Remus nodded. "Please Hermione, it may help me to finally let the ghosts of my past rest so that I can raise my son. And so that I can better help Harry too."
"Remus, I do have a question for you. At school, did Lily ever really talk about a girl named Julie?"
"Julie? I don't remember off hand. She may have. Why do you ask?"
"Lily's closest friend was named Julie. And there is either a mention of her or a letter to or from her every few entries. She's just more of the puzzle that I'm trying to piece together. The puzzle of Lily's life," she informed him with a smile. At his thoughtful, yet understanding nod, she bade him good afternoon and disappeared back into the attic and Lily's relativity exciting first year.
October 5, 1971
Last night we had Astronomy. Astronomy is such an interesting class. First of all it meets at night and we're out of bed at midnight so that we can look at the stars and the moon. Currently Professor Sinistra has us studying the phases of the moon. And last night's moon was a full moon. Gosh it was pretty. There's just something about being able to see the moon from the heights of the tower as opposed to looking at it from my bedroom window at home. I don't know what it is, but it's just different.
Anyway, back to the class. All of the first years were gathered for this lesson. All but Remus. According to James and Sirius, he'd gotten an urgent message from home and he had to leave. I think it was something about his mum or his grandmother or something like that. So I don't know when he's going to be able to make up the lesson. Perhaps next month, he'll be with us. Because Professor Sinistra says that we're going to study the full moon for the next couple of months. When I saw Remus at lunch today, he looked awful! Like he was the one who was sick instead of his mum or grandmother. Vanessa asked him if he was ok and he smiled and said yeah he was fine. I wonder if Van likes him. She's so out going and he's so shy. But they were together on the train with me.
I got several letters from home with today's post. Mum writes that she misses me and that she ran into Mr. Goshen the other day. He's curious to know how I'm doing at my new school. So Mum encouraged me to write him. I think I will. Daddy wrote to tell me how much he misses me and that he's got a whole bunch of stuff from Granna Louise's that we've never been able to go through just waiting for me for when I get home. He also told me that the War in the States is finally looking like it's starting to draw to a close. Finally. And that perhaps we'll be able to save enough money to take the family on a trip to visit Julie, Cassie, and Samuel. That would be so much fun! I know that Julie would love it!
Julie. I got another letter from her as well. It just breaks my heart to know that she's spending her twelfth birthday without me. And without her mum or dad. She said that there are some people in their building who are helping them out and hiding them from the Social Services people. It's become almost like a game as to who can keep the authorities from separating the three of them. I'm glad about that at least. She needs her brother and her sister with her. I'm worried about her though. She keeps saying that she's going to drop out of school and that the only reason she's not is because it's her dad's dream. I wish that there was a way I could help her. I can't even call her! I wonder if I can get her an owl for Christmas? That would make letters between us so much easier.
I also got a letter from Petunia! It wasn't much. Just telling me that she hopes that I'm doing well with my studies and the she's going to spend Christmas with Stephanie. Petunia still hasn't forgiven me for being so different. I'm not sure what we'll do once we are together under the same roof. She hates the fact that I'm so different than she is.
For all her lack of any real sense, Kathleen is very sweet. Take the other night. I woke up from yet another strange dream and this time it really scared me! Kathleen crawled over to my four-poster bed and asked me to tell her about it. I was glad that she was there. This dream it was so different than any of the others. I was walking with a young man, who I instinctively knew was my son. I've grown used to seeing this boy as a baby and a toddler, that I was rather startled to see him as a teenager. And in the dream, I wasn't much older than he was. We weren't alone. There were there others with us. Three men. One of them, I could tell was the boy's father, but I don't know who the other two were. But my poor son. He looked like he had the weight of the world on his young shoulders. And he was alone except for the four of us around him. We were walking through what looked a forest. It was very dark and dense. And we reached a clearing and there before us stood a group of hooded figures. They were somehow familiar to me like I'd seen them before. There was this pasty looking wizard. At least I think it was a wizard. It was weird. He didn't use his own wand but took the wand from the hooded figure next to him. Then the young man collapsed. I guess that as his mother, I knew he had just died, but I didn't want him to! My sobs were what caused Kathleen to come and sit with me. She woke me up from this nightmare. We talked quietly and I told her all about this dream. She looked at me with those big eyes of hers and asked, "Lily, have you ever thought about the fact that your dreams may tell the future?" Tell the future! She's got to be kidding. She told me that she had the gift of the Second Sight, I think is what she called it and that her family has no use for her gift. I shook my head at her. I know that I don't have any such gift at all and I think it's a bit of rubbish. I just wish that there was a way for me to either stop dreaming these dreams or for me to understand them!
Always,
Lily
December 26, 1971
I can't believe how quickly time went by! I'm home for Christmas and still can't believe that I've not written since October! Let's see. Where to begin?
On Halloween, the castle was decorated in all sorts of "frightening" ways. Peeves, the poltergeist in residence, decided to help the celebrations along by playing all sorts of pranks on both the teachers and the students. The results of his mischief caused James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter to try to find him and talk to him about the pranks he pulled. It was rather funny to watch really. The feast that evening was amazing. We had every sort of sweet thing imaginable. At home, Mum and Daddy never really did much for Halloween. Sure, Petunia and I were able to go trick-or-treating, but we didn't actually do much with this. I never did find out if Remus made up that Astronomy lesson. After that first one, we haven't really studied the full moon anymore.
There's the funniest looking tree on the grounds not far from the lake. It's called the Whomping Willow and it will attack anybody who comes near it. James was bragging the other day about how he could fly circles around it and not have it attack him. That boy is annoying!
I'm glad that for now, my dreams seem to have stopped. That last one about my son was so disturbing that Kathleen wondered if I might see the future. Whatever. I'm just glad that my dreams are the normal type of dreams that most girls dream. My dormmates are a rather interesting lot of girls. Savannah, Vanessa, and Kathleen. The twins seem to love and hate each other. Van's always protecting Savannah from anyone who decides to pick on her. I remember the days that Petunia did that for me. But what's so funny about them, is that Van constantly pretends that she hates her sister and that she's the only allowed to pick on Savannah. Last week, the four of us were in the common room trying to finish the Defense Against the Dark Arts essay when the Maraurders, as James, Sirius, Peter and Remus, have taken to calling themselves, came in and started picking on us. Well I guess that they weren't really picking on all of us, just me and Savannah. And more specifically, James and Sirius. I decided to try to ignore them. But Van! She was awesome. She decided that the boys needed to a dose of their own medicine. And she practiced one the defense hexes we'd been studying on them. It was so funny to see James and Sirius all of a sudden being petrified. We were laughing so hard, Remus and Peter included, that one of the older students had to perform the counter-jinx! I think that it's going to be war between Van and the boys now.
I'm worried about Julie. I haven't heard from her in weeks. Her last letter was saying how she and Cassie and Samuel are still avoiding the child protection people. Mum and Daddy agreed that I could get her an owl for Christmas, so I found her a beautiful grey and white striped owl. I named it Tiger. Daddy helped me to ship it to her. So, hopefully she'll get it and enjoy it. This way, she'll get to have a piece of my world.
Petunia's not here for the holidays. Daddy and Mum agreed that she could go to Stephanie's house in Surrey. It's weird spending Christmas without her here. I was out walking this afternoon and ran into Seveus from school. I forgot that he lived off of Spinner's End. I asked him if he'd had a good Christmas and he was very rude to me. Then I think he realized how his words had hurt my feelings and said that he was looking forward to going back to Hogwarts next week. He asked me how I'm liking Hogwarts now that I've completed an entire term. I told him that I found the school awesome and fascinating all at the same time.
It's funny really. But, he's so different here than at school. I wonder if it's because here he doesn't have to worry about who he is and staying on his guard against the constant teasing that our classmates do. I think he needs a friend. I'm going to try to be his friend and see what happens. I feel sorry for him.
Always,
Lily
January 3, 1972
I leave in the morning to go back to school. I can't wait! It's so exciting there. Everything I'm learning is so interesting. I think that Mum and Daddy have realized that I'll never really be a part of the world I've lived for the past 11 years. They know that I'm growing up and that I will belong in the magical world. But as Daddy likes to remind Mum, "Heather what she's learning doesn't make her any less of our daughter. In fact, it makes me love her even more!" Daddy didn't know I overheard him, but when he saw me, he wasn't upset. He's right too. I'll always be his daughter.
I finally got a letter from Julie, delivered by Tiger! Here's what she's writing.
December 27, 1971,
Dear Lily,
I love the owl! Though I'm not sure exactly how I'm going to be able to keep him. He's beautiful. Cassie and Samuel will have their hearts broken if we can't keep him. Thank you so much for sending me a piece of your world. You said in your note that anytime I want to write or send you something, that I should just attach it to the owl's leg. So I'm going to use him to send off your Christmas present. I've actually had it since Thanksgiving, and hadn't been able to afford to send it to you. This way, I hope, will be both faster and cheaper. Tiger arrived right before Christmas.
We're having some nasty weather over here at the moment. It's a combination of sleet and rain. And oh so cold. I'm actually sorry that we're off for Christmas right now. Because at least when we're at school, we're fed and warm. It's been hard the past few nights. The three of us have huddled together under every blanket we own to try and stay warm. It's not much fun.
I'm sorry that I've not written in a long time. We'd gotten word that we were about to be split up and ran off and hid. You'll never believe this but we were actually living on the streets for about a month! Then word got back to me that we could go back to our flat, so we did. Of course we don't have any electricity or anything like that, but we're still together, which is what I know that Daddy and Mum would have wanted.
The other day I was at the market, trying to get us some bread and cheese to get us through the next couple of days when this really cute guy started talking to me. Oh Lily, he's older, I think he's 16 at least. And he's so nice to me. He's been to the flat several times since we met and the kids love him. His name is Luke. Luke Randal. He's got blue eyes that are a shade I'd never seen before. They're a sort of navy. And he's got chestnut hair that is wavy. And, Lily, he's just perfect! Lily, he's been teaching me so many things. Wonderful things really. He wants me to come with him next year, after I'm thirteen, to see the world! I think I'm in love.
Anyway, I've got to go. Luke's here. Write me soon!
~Julie
OhJulie! My heart is just hurting for all that she's gone through. No heat, little food. I hope she'll believe me when I tell he to be careful with Luke. Sure he's sounds like a dream, but I don't know. There's something that she's not telling me. Her Christmas present is amazing. I don't know how she managed to find me a first edition of the one Nancy Drew book I've been missing, but I love it!
That dream came back last night. The same one with my son in it. It woke me up with chills. I've heard that there's a subject that we're able to take once we reach our 3rd year called Divination. If there's something about interpreting dreams, I'm going to take that class! Kathleen may know some stuff, but she's a bit of a flake and I don't want to ask her. And Van and Savannah of course know nothing of my dreams.
Now it's off to finish packing!
Always,
Lily
February 2, 1972
I got another letter from Julie the other day. I'm so excited. She says that Luke is going to help her come to England for Easter! I've missed my friend so much. I wonder if Cassie and Samuel are going to get to come as well? I still don't trust this Luke friend of hers. I think he's a bad guy. But he's going to totally be redeemed in my mind if Julie actually gets to come to England for Easter!
Sirius and Remus decided that James needed a birthday party for turning 12. His birthday was on January 30. And the only reason I know that is because he kept telling me and then asking me what I was going to get him. For some reason that I don't understand, James is constantly teasing me and running his fingers through his hair! But he's not really all that nice. Funny, yes, but he's just too sure of himself.
But back to the party. I don't know how they managed it, but the boys threw a smashing party in the common room. Everybody loves James. Even all the older kids. He's rich, comes from a proud wizarding family, and he's cute. I did not just say that James Potter is cute! I can't believe that! I don't really even like him. Anyway, Sirius, Remus, and even Peter managed to decorate the common room with all sorts of balloons and streamers. And then there was the food. They must have raided the kitchen somehow because there was treacle this and treacle that and pumpkin juice and all sorts of yummy goodies! I think that they had to get some of the older students to help. I mean we're all only first years. Sure James and Sirius are the best in our year at Transfiguration, but not so great at charms. And from what I could tell, that Quidditch pitch that was in the common room is a lot more complicated than what we've learned so far! But there were fairy lights and everything in the common room. Kathleen, Savannah, and Vanessa were all as impressed as I was. But unlike me, they decided to help inflate James's ego by exclaiming over them all night. Actually it was more Kathleen and Savannah. And Sirius was making sure that Savannah knew that he'd done most of the work. And Peter kept telling us that he and Remus had helped.
Van and I decided to wander over to the table covered with all of James's favorite foods and ended up chatting with a 7th year prefect we'd not met before. Alice Harper she was. She was telling us that she's going to be going into the Auror program after she leaves Hogwarts. She's such a sweet girl. She's got a round face and dark eyes. Her dark brown hair hangs to her waist and she had it pulled back with a headband.
Alice asked us if we'd gotten anything for James as a present. She told us that in her seven years here at Hogwarts that she'd never seen the pile of presents that a 1st year like James received for his birthday. I told her, 'I think he's an only child and that his parents decided to send him all sorts of stuff. I've never given birthday presents to witches or wizards before so I had no idea what to get him. I finally settled on something that is totally Muggle and that I knew he'd not have.' Alice and Van both looked up at me with raised eyebrows and a question on their faces. Before they had a chance to voice the question, I hurriedly added, 'It's a Muggle book of magic tricks with a deck of cards to go with it. I just thought that he'd like it.' I turned my attention to fixing myself a plate of yummy food to hide the blush that I felt creeping up my cheeks. Van reached over and gave me hug saying, 'That's a sweet idea Lily. And I think that he'll love it. It's so unique. No one else will have thought of that.' At her words, I relaxed and continued to chat with my friend and Alice.
I don't know when Sirius decided that it was time for James to open his presents since I lost track of time while getting to know Alice. But it seemed like all of a sudden all of the presents were piled in the middle of the common room floor and James was eagerly attacking them. There was paper flying all sorts of ways and laughter as he exclaimed over each and every present. I was glad to know that I wasn't the only girl to get him something. Kathleen had given a new set of quills, Savannah and Vanessa a book about Quidditch, some of the older girls gave him moving pictures of themselves with notes attached saying that they'd love to go out with him. His friends, though, I liked what they gave him the best. They gave him a self-inking quill that won't ever run out of ink while using it. Finally, there was just one present left in the pile --- Mine. I watched intently as he opened it and read my simple card, 'James- Happy birthday. – Lily.' His face lit into a huge grin as he tore the wrappings off the package. 'A book of Muggle tricks! I can't wait to try some of these. Maybe I can confuse Filch with something so simple since he's always trying to find a reason to land me-no us- in detention!' At his words, the room burst into laughter. But it was true, James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter had all managed to find themselves in detention with Filch at least once a week.
Overall, I think that it was a fun party. The boys have certainly set the bar for the next party. And that's to try and outdo the bash they threw for James' birthday.
Always,
Lily
February 18, 1972,
I'm so upset! I got Julie's latest letter this morning at breakfast. I was so excited to read it and hope to hear more about her coming to England at Easter. Her letter was so short!
February 15, 1972
Dear Lily,
I am so sorry! Luke won't be able to get a ticket to send me to England for Easter. I miss you so much! I'm mad at him at the moment, but I know that he loves me. I won't be able to write again until I send your birthday present. Thank goodness for Tiger. He's making it so much easier to get you a letter!
Love you,
Julie
I couldn't help it. I just started crying in the Great Hall. Kathleen, who was sitting beside me, asked what was wrong and I just shook my head. Even the boys noticed. And they're not usually paying too close attention to what we girls are up to. But maybe it was because their normal teasing of me and Savannah wasn't working. And that caused them to question what was wrong. Sirius took it upon himself to try and read my letter, but thankfully Vanessa just told him to bugger off! And that I was fine and that they'd see us in class. Thank goodness for my friends! The four of us got up and left the table with our breakfasts mostly untouched and went to clean me up. Lessons today were a complete waste for me, though I did try my best to concentrate. James tried to cheer me up later by demonstrating one of the tricks from the book I gave him for his birthday. He did manage to make me smile. But he could see that my heart wasn't in it. As I decided that it was time for me to go upstairs to the dorm and write about my horrible day, he grabbed my arm, looked at me with those beautiful hazel eyes of his, and said quietly, 'Lily, whatever is bothering you today and has made you so upset, I want you to know that if you need someone to talk to, I'll listen.' I gave him my first real smile of the day. 'Thanks James, I'm really fine, but thank you.' And then I ran up the stairs to the dorm so that I could write inside these pages. James can be sweet when he wants to. And he does have pretty eyes. I'd never let him know, of course, but his attempts at those stupid magic tricks did manage to cheer me up.
Always,
Lily
Hermione turned the last page of the small-leather bound book and absently thought about the fact that Lily's latest entry had marked the end of the fourth of such journals. She recognized the need to stretch her legs and left the haven of her attic refuge. These past few weeks since Pansy's capture, Remus and the other Order members allowed her keep the minimal protection charms around the house and attic. She felt free at being able to concentrate on her research without having to worry about being followed. And Lily's story was utterly fascinating to her. The early days of the relationship between James and Lily showed them as more friends than housemates. Hermione had to wonder what changed and when that relationship changed from tentative friends to hostile enmity on Lily's part at least and then into the love that everyone remembered the pair sharing. As she gathered her things to leave for the day, she realized that she needed to pick Remus's brain some more. More about the relationship between Lily and James in their first year than about Julie.
"I wonder what the others will say if I tell them that I need to bring in a computer or at least head to a Muggle library so that I can perform an Internet search for Julie," she laughed to herself. That was a battle that would have to wait for another day. The early relationship between James and Lily was more pressing in her mind.
