A/N: As always, thank you for the reviews. Less than a month until the season premiere. You know you're as pumped as I am.
Obbligato: a term used to indicate an additional instrumental part added out of necessity; it becomes an essential part of the melody and cannot be removed, even if the composer originally did not intend for it to ever be involved in the piece
"Peyton," Haley spluttered once again, staring disbelievingly at her long-lost friend. "You…" She was at a complete loss for words. Haley knew she was a nerd, and her vocabulary was extensive, but she really had no words for this moment. Part of her wanted to smack Peyton, part of her wanted to hug her, and an even bigger part of her just wanted a damn good explanation as to why she'd avoided them all for all those years.
"I'm back," Peyton said. An obvious statement, but one that helped shock Haley back to reality a little bit.
"Mom, when you said you'd been keeping stuff from me…" Jenny shook her head. "I didn't think it was anything this big. Why did you never tell me anything?"
Haley gasped softly at the sheer amount of sadness in Peyton's eyes as she gazed at Jake Jagielski's daughter. "Lots of reasons," she said softly. The sadness was deeply buried in her friend's green orbs, but on the surface, Haley saw an emotion she knew well: maternal love. Fiercely independent Peyton Sawyer had turned into a total mom for this girl.
Haley knew it shouldn't have stunned her. Peyton had been acting as a mom to Jenny from the moment Jake revealed to them that he had a daughter. Not from obligation or necessity, but because she loved her. But why had she insisted on accompanying Jenny to Tree Hill? Was she still with Jake? Where was Jake? She sneaked a peek at Peyton's left hand; it was void of rings. That didn't help her at all. Just because Peyton wasn't married, it didn't mean...anything, really.
"Sweetie," Peyton said slowly, choosing her words carefully. She kept a steady eye on Haley as she spoke. "We'll talk about everything later, I promise. And I'm sorry. Okay?"
Jenny shrugged. "Do I have any other option besides 'okay'?" she asked sarcastically in a quiet voice full of hurt.
Peyton's gaze left Haley as she pulled her daughter to her into a bone-crushing hug and kissed her temple. "I love you, babe. Hales'll take good care of you."
"Um…" Haley said. Brilliant start, she told herself irritably. "Peyton, where are you staying? Because Nathan and I, we could –"
"No, no," Peyton cut her off. "My dad sold the house, but he bought the office space above Tric and turned it into an apartment, so…that's where I'll be staying. It'll be good, to be back there," she shrugged.
"Back where? What's Tric?" Jenny inquired, the intense fire of curiosity bright in her somewhat injured eyes.
Both women ignored her. "Peyton, can we…can we talk?" Haley asked hesitantly.
Peyton's eyes were cloudy with tears. "Later, okay?" she asked softly. "I know you and Jen have stuff to get to. So later. We'll talk."
Haley wasn't taking vagueness, not at all. "Later as in tonight. Dinner," she insisted, despite the fact that she and Jenny were supposed to dine with the rest of CMC's participants. Peyton could come over for a late, lighter supper.
"Hales," Peyton breathed, looking down. "Not yet. I just can't."
Haley's heart broke for her. She didn't know what was going on with her, not at all. Peyton looked as slim and beautiful as ever, her eyes just as bright, but there was that sadness there. As long as she had known Peyton, behind the blinding green light of her orbs, there was an acute sadness. It was still there, dimmed and yet somehow, more powerful.
"Peyt…" she said in the quiet voice she normally reserved for her children when they were so upset about something that she herself was worked up about it. "I miss you, girlie." She shook her head. "Like hell, Peyton…you have no idea."
Her friend blinked rapidly. "I think I do," she said painfully, so tragically that Haley stopped fighting the instinct she'd had since she'd spotted Peyton, the one that told her to throw her arms around her and never let go.
Peyton hugged her back with just as much force, and Haley sighed. She had so many questions, but she knew Peyton. She needed time and space, and lots of it. "Dinner tomorrow night, okay, honey?" she asked, a few strands of Peyton's hair getting caught in her mouth as she spoke. When they pulled apart, she looked into Peyton's eyes seriously, and was beyond relieved when her friend voiced her agreement.
"Okay. Tomorrow night."
"Is someone going to tell me what the hell is going on?" Jenny finally demanded, gaping at them.
Peyton bit down on her lower lip. "Wait to let me tell you, okay, baby? It'll be soon, I promise you that." She leaned in to kiss Jenny's cheek before grabbing the handle of her bag. "I'll see you both tomorrow." She threw Jenny a pointed look. "You call me if you need me."
"Yeah."
Peyton shot Haley a quick smile, and then she took off. Haley stared after her, watching her disappear into the crowds.
She and Jenny stood there awkwardly for a moment. "So…" Jenny said quietly, "to think that I was nervous to meet you because you were a big musician."
Haley chuckled. "I babysat you before, kiddo. There's nothing to be nervous about here."
Jenny scuffed the toe of her sneaker. "Are you going to tell me everything? Or…anything?"
Haley looked at her sympathetically. "I should leave that to Peyton. You know that."
"Yeah, but I just…I can't believe how much she's kept from me," Jenny shrugged, looking at Haley with innocent eyes.
"I'm sorry," Haley said earnestly. "Especially because you're going to have to come home with me now, and meet my husband, who totally dated Peyton in high school, and my four boys, who are just tough to handle. Tonight, we're going to the camp's meet-and-greet…" A thought occurred to her and she grinned at the teenager who stood before her. "Hey, what would you say if I told you that Chris Keller held you when you were a baby?"
"Shut up!" Jenny cried delightedly, all the weight of the world fading for a moment.
"He did," Haley said truthfully with a smile. "C'mon, let's get you and your stuff home." She grabbed the handle of Jenny's bag so that she could roll it along behind them.
"Thanks, Mrs. Scott."
Haley laughed. "I know this has got to be weird for you, Jenny, but considering our history…I'd really prefer it if you called me Aunt Haley."
"Okay," Nathan said as calmly as he could, regarding the two sniffling boys who sat before him. His two-year-old was balanced on his hip, whimpering as he sought his dad's attention. Jamie was off pouting in his room; he'd wanted to get burgers for supper and his father had said no. Nathan's patience was wearing thin. He wanted Haley to get home. He knew she'd be busy with her camper, but her presence alone would calm the kids. "Okay," he repeated. "Nicholas, Noah…which one of you hit the other first?"
"He did!" both boys shouted insistently, pointing accusing fingers at each other.
Nathan groaned as Sebastian started to cry in earnest. "Shh," he cooed at his baby boy. "Okay, guys, how about this? No dessert for either of you, and do not hit each other again, do you understand me?"
"But Daddy!" they both cried in protest, speaking in unison, as they often did.
"We're ba-ack!" called Haley's melodic voice from the entryway.
"Thank God!" Nathan returned, fighting to keep his voice light.
He heard Haley laugh, but something about it was off, almost nervous. She came into the room a minute later, pulling a shy-looking blonde after her. "Hey, my boys," she cooed fondly as the twins ran to her.
"Mommy!" they both whined, launching themselves into her arms, snotty noses and all.
"Aw, Noah, Nick, what happened?"
They talked over each other, tattling and whining pitifully. Haley listened with raised eyebrows, waiting patiently for them to finish.
"No more fighting," she said firmly, "do you understand me? Now go get cleaned up and let's have some food, okay?"
"You have to help us clean up," Noah pouted. He was the most sensitive of their children and very attached to Haley.
It was at that moment, of course, that Sebastian started to wail in earnest, reaching for his mom. Nathan exchanged a resigned look with his wife as she took their youngest from him. "Okay, my honey, shhh," she soothed him. "Okay, boys, let's all go get cleaned up," she told the twins. "Come on." She met Nathan's eyes. "Where's Jamie?"
"You mean J. Luke?" Nathan asked with a small smile. "Sulking in his room because I wouldn't let him have a burger."
Haley sighed. "Well, at least he's being quiet." As she walked out of the room, she called over her shoulder, "I'm so sorry, hon, I'll be right back."
It was only then that Nathan remembered the teenage girl standing awkwardly in the room. "Hey," he greeted her kindly. "Sorry about all the chaos, but I guess you'll have to get used to it, huh? I'm Nathan Scott. It's really great to meet you."
The blonde arched her eyebrows and said, "Apparently, we've already met."
Nathan's eyebrows shot up as well. There was something about this girl, her Ramones tee and the slight bite in her voice that struck him as very…Peyton Sawyer. He felt a rush of emotions flood back as he realized that this kid looked almost exactly like Peyton had when they'd first gotten together. "I don't understand how that could be," he replied evenly.
The fourteen-year-old smirked. "Oh, well, then…nice to meet you, too, Nathan Scott. I'm Jenny Jagielski."
He could feel his jaw drop. Jenny Jagielski? On the list of people Nathan thought he'd never encounter again, she was pretty high up there. Jake's adored little girl had grown into quite the cutie; he didn't see any of Jake in her, not until he looked deep into her pretty blue orbs. "O-oh," Nathan stuttered. "Wow."
She nodded, hiding a smile, and crossed her arms. "I hear you dated my mom."
Nathan grimaced automatically. He'd never dated Nicki. No way. Never. Ew, was the only real thought that he could form at the simple idea of it.
Jenny actually laughed at his expression. "Peyton Sawyer?" she prodded.
His head was beginning to spin. Peyton was pretty damn high up on that list of people he thought he'd never encounter again, too, but not because he didn't want to. He missed her, but she'd seemed incredibly determined to cut every single one of them out of her life.
"Your…mom is Peyton?" he asked, entering the realm of complete confusion.
"Yeah. Haley said you knew my parents in high school. Peyton being one of my parents."
Haley re-entered the room with Sebastian snuggled into her embrace. "She's here, Nathan," she said softly.
His brain was not equipped for the information overload. "Peyton's here?"
"She said she had to come with me," Jenny inputted with a slight roll of her eyes. "Sorry," she added with a shrug.
"No," Nathan said instantly, forcefully. "Don't be sorry. It's good."
Jenny looked baffled. "Okay then," she said slowly.
Haley reached out to her, gently draping her arm around the younger girl's shoulders. "So listen, you and I need to head out to the camp's headquarters pretty soon. We'll have dinner there, but everyone else needs to eat. There'll be leftovers, though, so what kind of pizza do you like?"
"Anything's fine."
"Okay. Well. Nathan, why don't you order pizza?" She asked sweetly. It was such a wifely thing to do, to frame an order as a question, that he couldn't help but grin. "Let's get you settled, Jenny."
Nathan stared after his wife as she left the room, Jake Jagielski's daughter in tow. It appeared that there was a new broody blonde in Tree Hill, one that hadn't graced the town with her presence in nearly thirteen years. There was also an old broody blonde lurking around. If he hadn't had four kids, a wife, and a confused fourteen-year-old to worry about, Nathan would've bolted out the door and found Peyton Sawyer. He wanted an explanation for her disappearance, her reappearance, and absolutely everything in between. Especially everything in between.
Peyton flopped onto the bed in the middle of the master bedroom of the airy apartment. It was empty and bare, but it didn't seem lonely. It was more like a minimalist had last resided there. She knew that her father hadn't bought it for himself; it was for her, in case she ever decided to return. For that reason, he'd left the decorating up to her. At least she'd have something to do to occupy her time.
She missed Jenny already. They didn't spend an absurd amount of time together. Jenny had been to countless sleepovers and a couple week-long summer camps before, but Peyton had still never felt so disconnected from her adopted daughter. She loved Haley, always would, but she made her nervous. Haley and Nathan had Jenny in their care all summer long. They could tell her anything. They could tell her everything.
When Peyton had made the decision to lie to her daughter, it had taken a lot of consideration. She wasn't comfortable with it, but she'd honestly thought it was the right thing to do. Everything she'd told Jenny – or rather, everything she hadn't told Jenny – she had done with her kid's best interests at heart. And she had done so on the assumption that no one who knew any different would ever enter their lives.
She was a big believer in chasing dreams. That had always been the corny-but-true sentiment among her friends. Go out there and get what you long for. Get out there and do it all to the best of your ability. She couldn't deny Jenny the opportunity of a lifetime just because she'd made some risky decisions in the past. Like any mother, she thought that her child deserved it all. CMC was it for Jenny.
Unable to sit still, she got up and wandered into the downstairs club. Her high school haunt. Her pride and joy. Tric was filled with a lot of painful memories, but also some that she wouldn't give up for the world. It was a trade-off; conflicting memories brought her both happiness and grief. Haley stealing the show…it lead to Haley going on tour with Chris and leaving Nathan devastated. Her friends banding together to support her…only after she struggled with a drug addiction due to a dealer who'd controlled her business. Meeting her mother for the first time…and losing her for what felt like the second time. Her love of Lucas and the heartache it caused for them all. The call he had made for her, after her breakdown, the one that led her back to Jake.
Peyton had put a lot of love into the establishment she stood in, and it had given her just as much back. The thing about putting love into a project, a place, an inanimate object, was that it turned out pretty and perfect, absorbing the benefits. Getting it back was a different matter. Humans didn't have that same luxury. The perfection of love came with deep-digging, heart-wrenching flaws that didn't always appear until you were in too deep. Peyton felt an actual connection to the building because it housed a great deal of her past, but her past wasn't always pretty.
"Well, well," a slow, melodic voice drawled teasingly, making her jump. A shadowy form emerged about five feet away. It moved toward her with a confident swagger that could belong to only one person. Peyton shook her head. The smallest part of her wanted to smile.
He emerged from the shadows and leaned casually onto the bar, directly across from her. "Chris Keller was wondering when you'd show that pretty face of yours again."
"Peyton Sawyer was wondering when she'd have the chance to make Chris Keller's face not-so-pretty," she shot back with a fake, open-mouthed smile.
He pretended to contemplate her words, a slight smirk on his lips. "Does that mean you want to slap me again?"
"Yeah, genius, it does."
He shrugged, leering. "Whatever turns you on; Chris Keller is up for it."
Peyton shook her head disbelievingly. She wasn't in the mood for what he considered witty banter. "What were you thinking, Chris?" she demanded, lowering her voice to a near-whisper. "Bringing her here?"
"Hey," he said, raising his hands. "Jenny deserves it. She's got an amazing voice and she can play that guitar almost as well as I can. This can be great for her, Peyton. It really can." He shrugged. "Besides, you didn't have to follow her here."
She shot him a serious glare. "Yeah, right. Like I'm just going to watch my baby walk into this town, naïve and alone. You'd give her all this information about my past. I know it'll happen anyway. I hate it, but I can't avoid it. I need to be here when she finds everything out."
He just stared at her, smirking self-satisfactorily.
"What?" she growled.
"Your baby, huh?" she asked, leaning across and bar, his face close to hers. "Tell me, Peyton…how was I supposed to know that you'd adopted Jenny Jagielski? You haven't been in contact with anyone in years. It wasn't until I got the forms back…imagine my surprise when, in the parental permission section, I saw the name of the girl who broke Tree Hill's hearts."
"Don't be so dramatic," she hissed, growing increasingly impatient with him. "Okay, so then you knew. Why'd you have to accept her?"
Chris laughed lightly, looking straight into her eyes. "Let me level with you, 'kay, Peyt?" he asked in a sing-song, slightly condescending tone, using an abbreviation of her name that she only granted to certain people at certain times.
"Peyton," she bit out. He was without a doubt the most infuriating person she knew. She almost wanted to strange him.
"Jenny Jagielski is the most promising kid here. Jake's daughter…your daughter, now…is amazing. She can do great things. I thought, you know, I don't know Peyton very well. But she's Haley's friend…or at least she was. So I do have a good idea of what she believes. She'd want this for her kid. For her husband's kid. Whatever."
"I'm not married," Peyton informed him angrily. She wanted to contradict him so badly, but for once, he was being a (kind of) good guy, and he was making sense. "I guess…you're right, but I am not happy about this. Any of it. Why did you have to give her to Haley? Why not someone else?"
Chris leaned back, chuckling. "You know, Sawyer, you're hot when you're all flustered. I bet you find me annoying, but in a sexy way, right?" He dropped an eyelid in a casual wink.
"Chris –" she began, but stopped herself. She was tired from the flight and from the thought of all the emotionally exhausting moments she had yet to endure in this town. "Do not hit on me. Do not be an ass to my kid," she finally ordered. "That is what I need from you. Can you do those two things this summer?"
He took a couple steps backward without breaking eye contact. "Jenny's good at what she does. I'm going to make her a star, Peyton…that's a good thing, right? That wouldn't qualify as being an ass, right?" he added mockingly.
She ground her teeth together. "I guess not."
"But hitting on you, P. Sawyer?" he asked with a laugh and a mischievous glint in his eyes. "We'll just see how long until you want me."
Her jaw dropped as she watched him retreat into the darkness. "Don't call me that!" she shouted after him.
"Okay, hot stuff!"
"Chris!" she yelled, but he was gone. Thankfully, there was a chair behind her that she could collapse in to. Days ago, Jenny had worried about the summer, thinking that she might get scared and back out. Now, Peyton knew that if anyone was going to be running from the town, it would definitely be her.
It had taken her a long time, but she'd managed to forget. It hadn't been easy, but with persistence and the passage of time, she'd managed it. She'd forgotten about Brooke until Chris pulled out that old nickname.
She'd forgotten about the man Brooke was married to.
Haley showed Jenny to her room and left her to unpack her belongings. Noah and Nick had quieted down and were calmly settled in the living room with books. She decided to leave Jamie to his brooding for a while. She expected Nathan to be in their room, so she carried their two-year-old in with her and carefully sat him on the bed with a toy elephant.
Her husband was pacing. "I can't believe Chris didn't tell you who she was," he fumed, rambling. "I can't believe Peyton's back. What's been going on with her? What's the deal with Jake? Did you talk to her?"
"Yeah. She looked good but…sad. Then again, it is Peyton…sad is kind of average for her. I don't know any more than you do, Nathan. I got her to agree to come over for dinner tomorrow night. I guess we'll find out more then. God, I cannot believe that Jenny Jagielski is in our guest room right now. I held her when she was only a few months old, but I know absolutely nothing about her life since Jake left Tree Hill the second time…and now just look at her, she's so…"
Nathan filled in the blank: "Peyton. That is…Peyton, all over again," Nathan said softly, pointing toward Jenny's room. "There's not much of Jake in her, and there's sure as hell not any Nicki. The attitude, the clothes, the music…she even looks like her. It's impossible, but it's true."
"I know," Haley breathed. "It scares me, Nate, how little I know about Peyton's life now. It hurt when she left, and it still hurts that she left, but I can't hate her for it. She's still…Peyton. She's still me friend…" she trailed off, shaking her head. None of them had given up on her. When she appeared in L.A., they all tried to contact her. Brooke's visit was what it took to fully prove to them that Peyton no longer wanted anything to do with those she'd left behind.
Haley hadn't, in all honestly, been ready to stop chasing after her. She would've fought forever – Peyton deserved it, and part of her worried that Peyton needed it.
It was Lucas that convinced her otherwise. Brooke took off for L.A. almost three months after he proposed, insisting that she needed her best friend to be part of her wedding. It didn't feel right without Peyton. Lucas' own drive to find their friend had inexplicably faded away in recent months, but he didn't try to stop his fiancée. However, when she returned home nine days later a heartbreaking mess, despite all his love and support, it was easy to tell that he wasn't surprised.
Out of all of them, her closest friends, Brooke knew Peyton best emotionally. She'd been there when Anna Sawyer died and for every one of the following tragedies in Peyton's life. She was her best friend. Haley loved Peyton just as much, but on a more soulful level; their connection was formed through their passions for their art. Though it pained Haley to admit it: physically, Nathan knew Peyton best. But none of them had ever managed to forge a connection with her like the one that Lucas had. Lucas Scott's connection with Peyton Sawyer was deeper than any of that. A powerful combination of all three and then some.
It was for that reason and that reason that Haley backed off. If Luke thought it was for the best, then it had to be. She trusted that decision because she trusted him, but there were occasional moments when she admittedly regretted it.
But never before had she regretted it quite as much as she had when she laid eyes on the woman Jenny Jagielski called 'mom'.
A/N: Reviews equal happiness which equals a combination of inspiration and motivation, which when added, equal a new chapter.
