A/N: Thank you, as always, for the reviews, it really works as encouragement. I promise Lucas/Peyton interaction…eventually. Patience is key. To the reviewer who said I overuse the word "orbs", believe me: I know I do, but there are no other synonyms for the word "eyes". I only have two words to work with. Anyway, read on, everyone.

Berceuse: a cradle-song or lullaby in triple-time

"Thanks for dinner, you two. It was really amazing, Hales."

"Thanks, Peyton," she replied earnestly with that soul-searching gaze of hers.

Jenny liked Haley a lot, she really did. She was sweet and kind and infinitely caring, but it bothered her that Haley could take one look at you and see everything she needed to know. Jenny wasn't comfortable with being analyzed that easily.

She felt remarkably hormonal that night, the way you feel only when you're fourteen and confused and upset. She had felt tears building up behind her eyes at several points through their dinner, and each time had held them back as she tried to figure out why she suddenly needed to cry so badly. The only clear thought in her mind was simple and pathetically childish: I miss my bed. She just wanted her home, with her favourite pillows and big pink-and-purple blanket, the softly-lit bedroom where she and her mother would settle to drink root beer floats and have quiet, calm talks before bed. Every single night for as long as she could remember, Peyton would come and curl up with her for a few minutes before she went to sleep. Sometimes they talked about serious things, sometimes they were silly, but mostly it was just easy, everyday conversation. Every single night, before she drifted off to sleep, Jenny felt the reassuring pressure of her mother's lips against her temple as a soft, "I love you" made its way to her ears.

As ridiculous as it may have been, she felt like she was losing her mom. Last night, she'd missed that kiss and those words more than she'd ever thought possible. She'd been away from Peyton before, but she felt very separate from her mother since their arrival in Tree Hill. Peyton had obviously kept a lot of heavy, emotional baggage hidden from her daughter, and Jenny felt like she was missing crucial parts of her mother that she'd never before known existed. She felt young and lost, and she just wanted to go home to her damn bed.

When Peyton rose to leave, out of habit, Jenny went to follow her. It was only then that she remembered that the Scott residence was supposed to be her home for the summer. A home a few blocks and a short walk away from the woman who'd raised her.

Leave it to Haley to not only notice how torn she was but to call her on it. "You can go home with your mom if you want, honey," she said softly. "There aren't any rules. You stay where you want."

"No, I…I'm supposed to stay here. It's fine. I'm all unpacked," she offered as a lame excuse.

"You're not supposed to do anything, Jen," Nathan told her gently, genuine concern in his eyes. "You don't have to follow Chris Keller's moronic rules."

Haley shot him a silencing glare that almost made Jenny smile. "I, um…it's okay, really. I'll stay here."

And then her mom's green eyes found Jenny's own orbs, and any of her remaining resolve cracked. "You can borrow my pyjamas, Jenny, babe, you know that. You're not going to die if you don't brush your teeth for one night."

Jenny caught Haley's wince at those words, and Peyton shot her old friend an apologetic look, clearly understanding that Haley was now going to have to argue that point out with her six-year-olds.

"C'mon, angel," Peyton said softly, speaking only to her and never breaking eye contact. "Come home with me and we'll talk."

Her heart leapt hopefully. "Yeah?"

Peyton's smile was sad, conveying how upset it made her that Jenny had doubted her. "Of course."

Jenny crossed the room in twelve quick steps to melt into her mother's hug, just as she had countless other times throughout her fourteen-year life.

"It'll be okay, Jen," Peyton murmured into her hair. "Everything's okay."

She didn't believe her. From what she'd seen that evening alone, Jenny knew that things were far from okay with her mother, and that there was certainly a reason Peyton had been avoiding the town for so many years. "I just want answers," she whispered back, waiting for the strength and assurance of her mother's reply.

It never came. Peyton held her more tightly, but she didn't say a word.


Peyton sighed as she quietly shut the door of the apartment closed behind her. "Jenny…honey…" she said to her daughter's retreating back. Jenny flopped down on the sofa in the living room, and Peyton joined her. "Talk to me? Please?"

Jenny pouted back. "All my life, I never could have even dreamed that you'd kept stuff from me. Stuff this serious and significant."

"Babe, I wasn't about to tell you about all my history when you were four. I somehow don't think you would have understood."

"Mom, be serious!"

"I am, kid," Peyton told her honestly, looking deep into Jenny's prettily innocent blue eyes. "It's hard stuff to venture in to. I was always scared."

Jenny looked at her sadly and Peyton felt almost guilty. She knew how her daughter was feeling. When you were someone's child, no matter your age, it was always heart-wrenching to realize that your parents were not perfect beings who never cried, feared nothing, and never made mistakes. Peyton remembered when her mother died and her father came undone. How helpless and powerless she'd felt, mourning her mother and losing her father. If she hadn't had Brooke, she would have lost even herself. She'd only been a little girl, but she'd always known that she never would have survived it all without her best friend.

Best friend. Not exactly a term that could be applied to someone she hadn't spoken to in years, to someone whose parting words had been accompanied by a bitch-slap and later rectified in a painfully emotional note, left lying on Peyton's desk for her to find.

When Haley said her name that evening, it'd come as a shock to her system. It'd taken so much effort and strength to forget Brooke and Lucas, to push them to the very back of her mind and into a locked area she could open up only when she chose to. Lucas and Brooke. Married, happy, and in love – they had everything Peyton had dreamed of, everything that she had lost. And more than any of that: they had each other, and she was without both of them.

"I think you're being selfish," Jenny announced. "You didn't want to deal with it, then fine. But why did you have to come with me? Why'd you have to make this summer even worse for me?"

"Jenny. You know that was never my intention."

"Then why are you here? Go home!"

Peyton gave her a warning look. "You and are are staying here. All summer."

"So it doesn't matter about me then, does it? You just have something stupid to prove to yourself, Mom, admit it! If I don't want this music camp thing anymore, you'd just make me stay to prove that you're over whatever the hell happened the past with the Scotts and Chris Keller and…Brooke and that other guy."

"No, Jenny, that's not it at all! I won't let you give up on CMC because this is a big deal for you and it's helping you get to amazing places. I'd never submit you to something you absolutely hated or…anything. I'm not here for me, honey."

"But you are. How stupid do you think I am?" Jenny demanded.

"I don't think you're stupid at all," Peyton replied, struggling to maintain her calm.

"Damn it," Jenny muttered. "This would be so much easier if you'd just stayed in L.A. Or maybe if you weren't so pathetically caught up in what happened a million years ago."

Peyton's eyebrows shot up and she felt anger bubbling in her veins. "Jennifer Lynn, don't you dare."

Jenny planted her hands on her hips. "It's the truth, Mom."

She just shook her hand, afraid of how close she was to crying and yelling. "You have absolutely no clue what you're talking about."

Jenny threw her hands into the air in exasperation. "But who's fault is that, huh?"

"Jenny." Stop, please, she pleaded in her mind.

"When will you stop letting your melodramatic history interfere with my life?"

"Hey!" Peyton snapped fiercely. "Never have I let my life get in the way of yours. You're not stupid, Jenny, just like I said, so you really should be able to understand that – and you know it is true, young lady." She took a deep breath. "Go raid my pyjama drawer and calm down a little, okay? Let's just talk about this."

Jenny's stiff posture deflated, and she suddenly looked younger. "Okay," she said softly.

Peyton reached out to run her fingers lovingly through her daughter's hair. "Off you go, babe."

When Jenny left to change and cool off, Peyton buried her face in her hands. This whole town held so much devastation for her, but maybe she was overreacting. Maybe she just needed to get over herself and move past her mothers' deaths and her absentee father, past the boy who'd broken her heart and the one who stepped with those eyes that were only for her and helped to fix it, past the brutal deterioration of a ten-year friendship, past all the pain she'd caused Nathan and Haley. Maybe she just needed to suck it up. The only problem was…she couldn't. That was her life, and as much as those memories hurt, she valued them, too; especially the good ones that found themselves lodged in between horror and heartache.

Jenny re-emerged from the bedroom in board-short length shorts and a tank top. "Hi," she whispered, tentatively sitting back down next to her mom.

"Hi, honey," Peyton replied with a sad smile. "Just hear me out, okay? I came here for you, not me. I know it may not seem like that, but whether I'd come or not…you would've had to deal with my history. I just wanted to be here for you as you did."

"I could've dealt with it a long time ago, though. If only you'd told me, and then it could just be…history. We could let it all go."

"Kiddo…that's the thing. I can't let it go. I'm not hanging onto it for how I felt or what it was…it's just that it's always going to be there. It's my past; it's not exactly like there's a viable method for escaping from it. And yeah, it's confused and convoluted, and God, it sucks sometimes…but there are some parts that I would never give up for the world. I mean, Nathan and I, when we dated, we were a mess…but eventually we became friends, and I really value having him in my life."

"Which you've shown by not speaking to him for the past, what, decade?"

"Jen," Peyton sighed.

"You're just not making sense to me."

"I know I'm not, and I'm sorry, but that's where the whole convoluted part comes in. Without all my high school drama, I never would have had Haley, and without it, baby, I never would have had your dad," she pointed out, delicately speaking the single syllable in a vain attempt to avoid the pain it would inevitably cause them both. "And…Brooke. I mean, we've been engaged in a strange fight for years now, and we haven't talked in so long…but she was my very best friend. She got me through my darkest days, when I was just a little girl. Just because I'm mad at her now doesn't mean I'm going to let that go." She shrugged. "Yeah, maybe I have a lot of baggage…okay, not maybe; I do have a lot of baggage. Maybe it was stupid, Jen, but I just wanted to protect you."

Jenny stood and moved away from her. Peyton winced, immediately regretting her decision to mention Jake. "It doesn't matter anymore, Mom. So what if you were friends with Brooke when you were five? You're clearly not now. Who the hell cares if you and Nathan ever dated, what difference does it make? Did you have some kind of twisted plan to get him back?"

She resisted the temptation to laugh. "Um, no, honey…believe me, my romantic regrets in this town aren't exactly centered on Nathan Scott."

"Well, I don't care who they are centered on, Mom! Just let it go. Brooke and Haley and Nathan…and Dad." She shrugged, tears pooling in her eyes. "Just let it go."

"Sweetheart," Peyton began, also standing as she reached out for her daughter.

Jenny took a step back.

"It's not that simple. I wish it was."

"Stop wishing and do something about it, then! Mom, please! For me, alright? Let it all go for me. You wanted to protect me, right?" She held her hands at her sides, palms open. "So do it. Protect me."

"Honey," Peyton tried again.

"If you really did come here for me, and not you, then let it go."

"Jenny, you don't understand what you're asking. I can't exactly erase my memory."

"That's not what I want you to do!" Jenny cried, frustrating. "I want you to let it go." She shook her head. "But…you can't, can you? You just can't."

Peyton just looked at her sadly, struggling to come up with something brilliant and parental to say, but she was at a complete loss.

"Right," Jenny said. "Great. You know what, Mom? You know what I think? I think this is all really pathetic. You've always seemed so strong and powerful to me, and I admired you so much, but you're only strong when you're far away from all your stupid demons. It's pathetic, it really is, that you have to lie to your kid to protect yourself from all this drama." She shook her head disbelievingly. "I'm leaving. Call me when you stop being a high school girl and you're ready to be my mom again." She grabbed her jean jacket and made a beeline for the door.

"Jenny Jagielski!" Peyton cried, but by the time the words left her lips the door had slammed shut behind her daughter.


"Hey, Millie," Lucas greeted his wife's second-in-command as he entered her ever-busy offices. Even past ten p.m., as it was when he walked through the intimidating glass doors, the Clothes over Bro's building was humming with activity.

"Hey there," she replied with a kind smile, not pausing in her hasty walk even for a moment.

Lucas had to jog a couple steps to catch up to her, and then they fell into step. Millicent had some sort of Bluetooth device attached to her ear, a huge purse slung over her shoulder, glasses hanging around her neck, and was carrying a small pile of fashion magazines. On top of the pile was a clipboard full of unintelligibly scribbled notes. He couldn't even begin to imagine doing all the work this woman did in a single hour, never mind years.

"What can I do for you, Luke? You looking for your girl?" she asked brightly in her soft voice, perching her glasses on the bridge of her nose and scratching something off one of the many lists on her clipboard. It still looked like she had about thirty tasks to accomplish.

Brooke emerged from an office at that exact moment, a folder open in her arms as she chatted quickly and seriously with John Anthony, one of the other important people in the company whose job Lucas never fully understood.

"Brooke, Paul and Yvette stopped by earlier, they were a little upset about the Chicago deal – call Paul, not Yvette, he has a crush on you so he's much more likely to cooperate. Innovative Metamorphosis called, they want to pick up the new line, I said I'd consult and get back to them; in my personal opinion, I'd say no. Their clothes are cute but they seem like a pain in the ass to deal with. And Luke's here," Millie said breezily without missing a beat as she walked right past her boss.

"Thanks, babe, you rock my world," Brooke replied just as calmly and unconcernedly. She muttered something to John Anthony, who chuckled, saluted her, and walked off the direction Lucas had come from. Then she closed her folder sharply and finally looked at him. "Hey, husband!" she chirped, leaning up to kiss the corner of his mouth. "I know I said I'd be done by now…I'm sorry," she said with an apologetic wince.

"I should've called," he shrugged. They'd been in the middle of some intense foreplay when Brooke got an 'emergency' call from work and had reluctantly hurried off. He'd told her he'd pick her up in an hour so they could continue what they'd started.

"No, I should've been ready," she replied, tossing his words away with a regal flick of her wrist. "Now what's going on? You miss me too much?"

Lucas smiled. "That, yeah, and…so does Mira. I left her with Jaclyn and some colouring books out front. She woke up crying for you…so I brought her down here. I hoped you could come get some ice cream with us. She won't fall back asleep for a while."

She appeared to melt. "Aw, my little princess. Millie! We have ice cream, right?"

Millicent seemed to come out of nowhere. "We most certainly can," she said with an impish grin. "I'm on it. Chocolate sound good?"

"Perfect. I don't know what I'd do without you."

Lucas raised his eyebrows. "What's your master plan, Pretty Girl?"

"Mira can help me do layout while she eats her ice cream. If she hits the hay she can sleep on my couch, it's big enough. Just let me be with her?"

"Of course."

"Okay. Listen, you should go home. Try to write."

He groaned. "Trying's not doing much for me these days."

"Aw, Lucas…I'm sorry you're struggling." She slipped an arm around his waist and leaned into him. "Go home and take a bath or something, okay?"

He gave her a skeptical look.

"Okay, so that's what I would do if I was stressed. You…go shoot some hoops. Just clear your mind. You'll have peace and quiet: Mira and I will be done soon and then I think we might…stop at Naley's…?"

"Brooke," he sighed. "Haley asked you for a little space."

"Oh, come on! Aren't you just a little curious as to what's going on?"

"Very curious. But I'm going to respect Haley's wishes, and you should too. We don't have secrets; she'll tell us soon enough."

She gave him a small smile. "I trust Haley. But whatever it is can't be that bad. I'm sorry, but I'm going. I hate secrets, even if they're only kept for a little while. I'll just stop by. You wanna come with?"

"It's nearly ten thirty."

"Short visit, Luke. Sebastian won't sleep until midnight, you know that. So…you coming?" she asked with a pretty pout.

He sighed but relented. "No, it's okay…you and Mira stop by. I'm respecting Haley's wishes and I'm going home to…take a bath, I guess. I'll see you and our girl when you get there."

"Okay." She leaned in for another kiss. "I love you. I'll fill you in on all the dirty details when I get home."

Lucas grinned back. "You better."


Nathan heard the front door slam and light footfalls as Jenny rushed to the guest room – her room, for the summer. He sighed. Some sort of damage control was probably in order. She seemed like a really great kid, and he felt bad for her. Not to mention that he felt like he knew her. Because she was an old buddy's daughter, and because she was Peyton's mini-me.

Haley hovered outside the door Jenny had slammed behind her, biting her lower lip. A relieved smile lit up her face when she spotted her husband. "I don't know what to do," she whispered, wringing her hands.

"Well, yeah…neither do I. Should you talk to her?"

"I don't know," Haley shrugged helplessly. "Maybe…you could?"

"Me?" he asked sceptically.

"Yeah," she said brightly, warming to the idea. "Sometimes I don't really know how to…connect with people like you and Jenny. It took me a while to find my way to your heart, and to get pack there the times I took wrong turns."

Nathan frowned. "What do you mean, people like me and Jenny?"

"People with walls. I'm so…open with everything I feel all the time that I don't always know how to break walls down." She sighed. "Can't you try, Nathan, please?"

He pulled her to him in a hug and sighed as well. "Anything for you. But…I can't promise anything."

"I know. Just try," she insisted calmly, gently pushing him toward the door.

Nathan didn't really have any idea to handle a teenage girl. He knocked hesitantly and opened the door a crack when he didn't receive a response. "Hey…Jenny?" He poked his head in. "Can we talk?"

She was sitting on her bed, clutching a pillow to her chest as she curled into a tragic little ball. "I guess," she whispered, sounding as though she felt like she had to other choice.

Nathan left the door open the slightest amount so that she wouldn't feel trapped. He walked over to her slowly and took a seat at the foot of her bed. "Did something happen with Peyton?" he asked sympathetically.

"Mom and I fought," she replied in a choked-up voice. Nathan internally scolded himself. He had to remember to refer to Peyton as Jenny's mother.

"Yeah? About what?" he carefully prodded.

"It's just that…she doesn't tell me a lot. And all of that stuff that she kept from me, she…it just effects her so much and that…it scares me."

"Why?" Nathan questioned quietly.

"Because…" Jenny looked up at him at last, as though imploring him to understand. "It's like her history means more to her than her present. Than me."

Poor kid. "Jenny…your mom would never think like that. I know her, I know that."

"Yeah, I guess you do know her," she muttered. She frowned deeply. "Do you think my mom still has a thing for you?"

Nathan laughed out loud and immediately tried to disguise it as a cough. "Ahem. No. Sorry, Jenny, but…God, no. Peyton and I, after we broke up…we've always joked about wanting each other, just stupid sexual innuendo, but it's never meant anything. We had a relationship, and yeah, it was mostly physical, but it was there and it mattered and we never intended to ignore it. We just so much better as friends. I love Haley with all my heart, and Peyton fell in love too, she had…uh, well, she had your dad, didn't she? That's not something you need to worry about, I can promise you that."

Jenny gave him a small smile and sat up a bit, loosening her grip on the pillow. "You knew both my parents in high school. That's so weird."

He just shrugged.

"Do you remember when they fell in love?"

He grinned back at her. "Yeah, sure I do. You were pretty instrumental to that whole story."

She scowled, confused. "You think they fell in love because my mom got pregnant?"

Nathan frowned right back, just as confused. "No, no. Jake, your dad, he told everyone about you at a point when Peyton was…kind of torn up about someone else. They'd never even spoken before, but she fell in love with you, at the very least. I think she saw in you guys the family she'd always wanted. Nobody ever imagined Jake and Peyton would fall so in love, and that it would be so hard." He was proud of himself for the simple accuracy of his description of events. It seemed like a fairly comforting thing to say.

Jenny stared blankly at him, no longer grasping the pillow. Her eyes were filled with calculation and fear. They were wide as if terrified, the deep navy blue of sorrow and secrets.

"Jenny?" he asked cautiously.

"What are you saying?" she whispered in a panic.

"I…" His brow furrowed. "I…what…I just…"

Jenny's entire body appeared to be trembling. She swallowed hard. "Are you…are you telling me…" She gasped, a sound somewhat like a sob as she gaped at him. "My mom…Peyton's not my mom?"

Nathan's jaw dropped as well. Oh, God. Oh, no. Oh, shit. Peyton, he realized, had made the mistake of hiding something very long ago, and he had just made a mistake that made it a hell of a lot – possibly irrevocably – worse.

A/N: The more you review, the more I write.