Chapter 39: You Did Try


July 21

Recovery Room


America hadn't come out of her Games nearly as bad off as Logan had been, though the medics in charge of patching up the victors had made it a point to pump her full of drugs until she was ready to get back out in the world. Not because she was hurting, necessarily, but because she kept trying to take a swing at the medics. Even now, when they were supposed to be discharging her, she kept glaring at them, half daring them to try anything as the IVs finally came out.

And in rushed the little team for Twelve — Noh, Ian, and Black Bolt. All ready to prep her for re-entering the world and having to sit down with Tivan again.

"Congratulations," Ian said with a warm, reassuring smile, though neither of the other two looked like their smiles were nearly as warm. Probably because they weren't quite as dense as Ian was.

"Thanks," America said dryly, looking past her escort to Noh. "Where's your line partner? Isn't she invited to this party?" She gestured at the hospital gown she was still wearing. "Or did you think she might ditch you for me if you brought her to see me in all this glory?"

Noh shook his head at her. "She's with Logan prepping him for the cameras — and I have to do the same for you, but I promise not to touch your hair," he said with the slightest of smiles.

"So he can be taught," America muttered to herself.

"Believe it or not, I'd like you to be as comfortable as possible when it comes to this sort of thing," Noh said before his smile slipped the slightest bit, and he added, "After all, we'll be doing this for some time."

She raised an eyebrow his way. "Sounds like you're stuck with me."

"Oh, I don't mean to make it sound terrible," he assured her quickly. "I don't actually mind working with you in the least."

"Could've gotten worse, huh?" she agreed, though when Ian tried to put a hand on her shoulder to steer her out of the room, she pulled away from him hard and glared at him. "No touching."

"Right." Ian stared at her for a moment. "Well, you do have to come with us to the next room—"

"Have to?"

"America, really, this will be much simpler if you just let us do our jobs and get you through this interview," Noh said with a sigh of longsuffering.

"Or," she said, "you could just give me some shorts and a hoodie. I say screw Tivan, and we all go home."

"That's just not going to happen, and I think you know it," Noh told her.

"Come on. I don't want to do it — I know Tivan doesn't want to interview me for his farewell bruhaha. And you have your line to get back to…"

"America," Noh said, his tone half-pleading. "Just… just at least let us do a little prep work. Get rid of the fresh-from-the-hospital look."

"It's not a good look? I think I rock it."

"America."

"Fine." She shook her head at him. "I will sit. In the chair."

Ian looked relieved to hear it as he stepped forward. "And we'll get you looking—"

America shot Ian a glare. "I will sit in the chair," she said.

By that time, Noh had more or less gotten everything prepped, and she looked over the red and white stars in the dress that was short enough to meet her approval — even if it wasn't shorts and a sweatshirt like she wanted. It was easy to change into out of her hospital gown, too, which she appreciated. But wearing the dress and letting them primp and prime her was something else entirely.

She was entirely ready to fight them every step of the way, too, until Black Bolt put a hand on either of her shoulders and physically put her in the chair. She was so surprised by the move from the usually calm victor that it worked, and she sat down for Noh to start his work — as Black Bolt shoved a note into her hands.

Play along, the note read in Black Bolt's perfect script. Don't make yourself a target just to get cheap shots in, because they won't take it out on you. You're too high profile. They will find a way to take it out on your friends, the ones in the family interviews.

America glanced up at her mentor, who gave her such a serious look that she very clearly couldn't argue that point, especially considering the fact that she'd busted herself out to the whole country that she cared about her idiots back home. And this was the Capitol, the same people who had absolutely no problems torturing Billy until he died.

So she scowled all the way through Noh's prep, methodically tearing Black Bolt's note to shreds in her lap until he was done.

Noh had gone light on touching her up, and in all, she actually had to admit that the whole ensemble wasn't too shabby, even if it was a bit shimmery in places for her tastes. It looked nice when the stars in her dress shimmered in the light, but it wasn't really her style.

"Think they'll play Billy's death?" she asked at last, her tone for the first time lacking any trace of confrontation.

"Not all of it," Ian said hesitatingly.

"But enough," America finished for him, nodding to herself. "Got it."

"They'll want to ask about the rest of them too," Noh warned her.

"Yeah, I know. I just…" She let out her breath and ran a hand through her hair. "Just hoping they don't play the whole thing. I don't really… know how long it took," she admitted.

"Don't hit anyone in public," Noh told her, trying for a little smirk. "I've learned that the hard way. I'll tell you that story when you get back, shall I?"

America stopped and looked him over appraisingly for a moment before she had to chuckle and nod. "Yeah, sounds like you'll have to," she agreed. She smoothed the dress down and admired her reflection one last time before she nodded. "Alright. Let's get this circus started. Sooner we can get it rolling, the sooner I can get home and go back to doing something that actually matters."

"No arguments there," Ian said, still looking a little nervous — but that was apparently a constant for the fidgety escort.

When they headed down to the staging area, America was surprised at how much it felt just like before the Games — and how much it didn't at the same time. It was the same place backstage, but sans twenty-three tributes and their mentors hissing last-minute instructions. It gave the whole place a sort of empty feeling, especially because the production crew hadn't even removed all the chairs that the kids had been sitting in before their pre-Games interviews.

America sat in that place with the ghosts of all the kids that had died and tried her best to look like it didn't bother her as she listened to the sound of the Capitolites waiting for her.

It was obvious the moment Tivan stepped out to receive the adulation of the crowd, his arms outstretched as if he could physically take it all in. The roaring crowd cheered the victors as they came in, and then the Twelve team loudest of all, though America almost smirked when she saw on the feed backstage that not a one of the men on her team looked comfortable with the cheering.

And then, last of all, the newest victor made her debut, and America was surprised at how disorienting it was. Blinding camera flashes and deafening screams all around her — it was hard to know which way was up for a good long moment.

She remembered Black Bolt's warning to play along, so she didn't flip off the crowd the way she wanted to — though she felt like that would have been just retribution for screwing with her ability to know which way to walk until her eyes and ears adjusted to it all. But she wasn't going to be meek about it, either, and she pulled her sleeves a little lower and her dress a little higher before she sat down across from Tivan, the way most people would pull on battle armor. It was all she had on hand — for the moment.

"Welcome, Welcome, Ms. America Chavez," Tivan said, though he was talking more to the crowd than to her. The crowd screamed out its excitement all over again, and he grinned his too-white grin. "What a year — unlike anything we've seen so far. But then, that's what made it a Quarter Quell. Setting up for the years to come, no doubt."

Almost without thinking about it, America nodded. "Yeah, pretty strong finale for you too, huh?"

He had a look of clear and total loathing for a moment, though the faux smile never slipped as he chuckled as if it was a terrific joke. "Oh, my dear girl, this is not about me in the least. This is your show, your accomplishments … your crushing near misses." The smile morphed into the most comically false look of sympathy that America could have imagined as he continued.

"You … were such a wonderful friend to Mr. Kaplan," he said, but quickly added to his statement. "And so many others. So, so many in the field hid under your protection … though none of them for very long."

"I don't know that three kids is 'so many,' but I guess when you don't have any friends yourself, even one is a lot," she said with a perfectly straight face. "It's alright; that's what retirement homes are for."

"Just three?" he said, frowning a bit. "So you weren't bothered as much as it seemed by Miss Khan?"

"I did a crap job protecting her," America said with a frown that matched his, but with more sincerity. "If you're talking about kids I actually helped, it was just three. Two, really. Kitty didn't need my protecting; she could handle herself."

"But you still tried," he said.

"Yeah," she said with a small shrug.

He nodded his head. "Then let's begin, shall we?" With a grand, sweeping gesture, the colors on the stage shifted, and the replay began starting with the Reaping — though it cut out the big kiss between Billy and Teddy that everyone had been talking about for the past two weeks. It wasn't her compelling story after all — strictly speaking. In fact, he blew over most of anything that even showed Billy if it wasn't entirely necessary.

America had to frown at that. Without Billy, it just looked like she had volunteered from her own confidence, her own determination. Which made her look stupid, first of all, but it totally blew off Billy's idiotic bravery. "Didn't volunteer until Billy stuck his neck on the line for his boyfriend," she said, loud enough to be heard over the footage. "It was his show, not mine."

Tivan just gave her a look of sympathy that rang with so much falseness that she could only glare at him. "Yes, you were determined to build him up. I understand you even asked to be outfitted so as not to outshine him. Such a selfless decision." He played a clip of the parade, the smile widening. "Of course, you couldn't help but outshine him all the same. It's alright. You made an effort, at least. You can't succeed every time."

The footage shifted, and the bloodbath began to play. She saw Billy running stupidly toward the Tesseract, and Tivan leaned forward, eyes gleaming. "He did make it difficult for you, didn't he? Only seconds into the Games, and your first kill was in his defense. Did it matter to you in the slightest that his sister was only a few feet away directing Billy to safety while you beat Brian Braddock to death?"

America glanced up at the screen in time to see Betsy directing Billy away from her. Clearly, Betsy thought America was the threat to be avoided. And she certainly looked it, the way she was laying into Brian with everything she had.

"Only thing that mattered was getting Billy out of there," she said, though she'd lost a bit of her heat. Of course, it didn't take any time at all to get it back when she saw that Tivan was smirking to himself at her less aggressive tone. "What, you think I should have killed her too?" she bit out his way.

"I'm not sure," he replied. "Should you have?"

"Doesn't matter. She didn't threaten Billy; she wasn't my problem," America decided, trying to wave the whole thing off as she saw the rest of the scene play out — though she was surprised when one of the other Careers finished Brian off early.

"It certainly wasn't merciful, what you did to anyone who threatened your allies," Tivan said, one eyebrow raised as he considered the girl in front of him, and the scene behind him changed to show her and Billy fighting Yuriko. "Though the danger always seemed to get to them before you could quite… scare it off," he added as the screen showed Yuriko leaving Billy, edited so that it looked like she had just turned tail instead of turning to fight with Bucky.

"Did a little more than scare things off," she muttered, though the words didn't mean much when the footage showed her fretting over Billy, the worry obvious in her expression as the leak of poison into his system seemed to cripple them both.

"Of course you did," Tivan said soothingly. "Though you were quick enough to use others when they came by to help you take care of Mr. Kaplan. Oh, I'm sorry. You took them under your protection," he corrected himself with not a hint of apology in his tone.

The footage showed Kitty arriving close to their camp, but it also showed what America hadn't realized — how tired and alone she had been when she found the two kids from Twelve. Tivan played a side-by-side of Kitty hopelessly tending to a dying Alex and America tending to Billy as he tutted in sympathy. "Of course, you couldn't possibly have known you were just reopening wounds taking her in. She did hide it well, didn't she?"

Before America could fully digest that, though, Tivan had moved on, this time to show Miles miserable in his little tarp shelter in the rain until Kitty found him. "And the alliance was complete," Tivan said. "With Twelve, Nine, and a Spider-Man involved, you know, some were calling it the second Team Awesome."

"No way," America cut in sharply. "No. That was Kate's. Kate's and Logan's — and their team."

"It certainly didn't have quite the same… oh, it just lacked that extra something, don't you think?" Tivan asked, eyes sparkling. "There something that kept last year's team glued together, while yours simply fell apart the moment it was formed. Starting, of course, with your dear young friend."

Even though America knew it was coming, she couldn't help but wince the moment they started to play Billy's tortured screams.

Tivan looked delighted when he saw the grip she'd taken on her seat, white-knuckled as she tried not to hit him or bolt. "It was a surprise to all of us, you know. Completely inspired. Instead of simply killing off a tribute when you failed to kill anyone new — the intent was to draw in others to finish the job. So much more interesting than a simple, sudden death by poison, don't you think?"

"Why don't we test it out on—"

"But no one came for little Billy, did they?" Tivan continued, talking right over her. "I know you did what you could for him, my dear girl, but all that time later, he died just the same. Wouldn't it have been kinder to put him out of his misery? Didn't you consider that?"

She didn't have a good answer except to glare at him. Of course she'd considered it, but that would have been giving up on him. What would he know about that, anyway?

"Wouldn't that have been more humane than how it did finally end?"

She tried to find a witty retort, but the background had switched to the sudden, heartbreaking silence at the very moment they killed Billy, and just like it did when it happened, it took her breath right from her.

"You really didn't waste any time replacing him after that, did you?" Tivan continued on before she could get her feet back underneath her. "And every time you did…" On cue, the footage played the moment Bucky ran Kitty through with his stolen sword. "It was like a death sentence for those little ones you decided to shield."

"You don't—"

But before America could tell Tivan off for not knowing what he was talking about, the footage moved on, and so did he. "And when it was just you and young Miles Morales, not even battling two of his little 'clones' while he faced just the one… not even that was enough." He looked sympathetic. "You did try, my dear."

"Kid was doing fine until those things showed up."

"Oh, yes. He was quite good at running from fights and hiding behind his allies," Tivan agreed. "It's just a shame his first real fight ended that way — without his protector…" He made a dismissive wave that had America narrowing her eyes as they moved on to the final fight.

They showed Kamala's death first, of course — though it was played from her point of view. They showed the moment America saw Six's girl die as she crossed the ridge to investigate the noise of the falling boulder — only to find that the last two decent people in the arena were gone.

Tivan let the whole fight between America and Yuriko play uninterrupted after that — the two hadn't traded much in the way of words, and it was a dirty fight that had the whole audience captivated anyway.

"It's fitting that our first Quarter Quell victor so embodies the spirit of the Avenger Games," Tivan said delightedly. "You tried so hard to protect them, but failing that, at least you could avenge one death, anyway — even if it was just little Kamala."

America was clearly livid as Tivan sat there smirking. "Go to hell, Tivan," she ground out, and he simply laughed, delighted with himself for getting such a rise out of her.

"It's alright, dear girl — you won." He shot her a smile that was all teeth as he stood to address the crowd, swinging his arms out again as anything she might have countered him with was completely drowned out by the roar of all the people screaming. Tivan only just made himself heard as he declared her the winner of the Games — though he didn't try to shake her hand or approach her in the least before he waved her off the stage. Which was a shame, really, because she was itching to have an excuse to 'accidentally' break something.

She didn't have much time to really recover as she was rushed from there to pictures with the rest of the victors, and despite the fact that everyone was telling her to smile, all she wanted to do was hit something. The best she could do was make sure she wasn't giving anyone nearby a murderous glare, though Sam Wilson and Black Bolt on either side of her were grinning enough to make up for her in spades — which was strange enough, since Black Bolt wasn't usually the 'big smile' kind of person.

She remembered the note her mentor had given her before this whole thing started and glanced over at him and his forced smile. He was protecting her. So was Sam, clearly. And all at once, America couldn't stop the rising anger as she closed her eyes to keep from letting it show on her face.

She didn't want to be protected. She wanted to tear down the Capitol for every offense it had committed. She wanted to kill Thanos when he presented her with her crown. She wanted to tear it all to the ground.

But then Black Bolt put a silent hand on her shoulder, and she thought of Teddy back home. Of Nate and Eli.

She took a deep breath. She could do this. Even if it killed her.