Sorry for the delay, but school is eating me alive and I'm so behind. Don't worry, we're past the halfway point and I have the ending written. It's just the middle that is driving me a bit nuts. I am so pleased so many of you were terrified by my Barry/Wally blow out. I was pretty miserable writing it, I took every single bad memory I had and put it in there and it was still harsh. But I think it had to be written. And now…more suffering. Sorry!

A special dedication to XDDDD whose reviews make my day. If you post with a name you'd like me to use, I'll give you a cameo in the story. And to everyone who reviews, thank you. You make having less sleep worth it. And the next chapter is nearly done! But in this chapter…wow, I can't wait for your reactions.

Close every door to me,
Hide all the world from me
Bar all the windows
And shut out the light

Just give me a number
Instead of my name
Forget all about me
And let me decay
I do not matter,
I'm only one person
Destroy me completely
Then throw me away
If my life were important I
Would ask will I live or die
But I know the answers lie
Far from this world

--Andrew Llyod Weber (edited)

Close Every Door to Me

Wally realized quickly that there were worse things than being tortured physically. There was a mental anguish that could top anything he had ever endured. The hollow feeling in his chest where his heart used to be was a dull ache that reached through his entire being. He wanted to breathe normally but every exhale and inhale was laced with pain that seemed to have no origin but his own mind. He lay on his bed and stared up at the ceiling, counting the tiles and wondered how much more he could endure. He had read about radio silence in books, but living it was a completely new matter.

He had finally done it. He had destroyed the relationships he had held so dear. He had always been trouble, his own parents had regretted having him. Uncle Barry and Aunt Iris had given him a chance but he had destroyed that within a decade. Dick and Roy had been his best friends, but they would never trust him. In fact, if the League ever forgave him, it would be a miracle. He had burned too much bridges and right now, he couldn't even face them.

He still had to apologize to Robin and Superman for lying to them. He still had to write to the Hamilton family and express his sadness for their loss. He still had so much unpleasant things to do and frankly, he had no wish to begin. He just lay there and waited for the time to pass and his head to clear. He didn't even turn his head when the door opened.

"Time for your food," Aunt Iris said quietly, entering the room. She had done this for two days, like a jailer bringing the death row prisoner some vittles. He had lost interest in anything but sleep long ago and he had just abandoned the food by the desk.

Of course, today, he had noticed what new sights of sadness he had brought his family to. She looked horrible, her hair was a mess and she had frosting on her nose. She had been binge eating, never a good thing for his aunt. Of course, since he caused it, he had no reason to scold her.

"I'm not hungry," Wally said mechanically, as he had done for every meal. He hadn't eaten in two days and he was surprised not to even feel remotely famished. Feeling hollow had spread to his entire body and had left him unable to do much but sulk.

"You have to be hungry. You are always hungry," Aunt Iris said. "This is the tenth meal you've turned away. You need to eat," she said, in a voice that ranged between an order and a plea.

"No, thank you," Wally whispered, sadly. He was still drinking a health shake, it would take a week for malnutrition to set in. He gently sat up, trying to look healthy. He didn't want them to put him in the Watchtower sick bay. Being in a fake gravity spaceship made him nervous, and a bit claustrophobic.

"You'll eat or you'll go on IV," Aunt Iris said, in a firm tone. She had been speaking to him but there was an icy coldness to her that reminded him of his deep disgrace. "You need to keep up your strength if you want to heal. Your blood count is tanking."

"I said I'm not hungry," Wally whispered in a listless tone. "I'm bored." The television had been removed and all of his video games had been mysteriously thrown against the wall in anger and dented.

"Deal with it. I do have books for you and if you want to rest, you have some of your lectures on tape. I'm sorry, kid, but you made this bed and now you have to lay in it," Aunt Iris said, softening slightly as she sat down at his side and stroked his hair.

"He hates me, you know. I knew he would and now he does," Wally said darkly. "That's why he's barred all the windows and shut out the light of technology. He wants me to suffer, all alone, with nothing but my guilt to keep me company." He was actually extremely hungry by the smell of the shake, but refused to give in.

Aunt Iris sighed. "I don't like keeping you here, you know. I used to hate how you were always confined to your room when your parents were alive. I know this is hard for you. But you need to rest and you need to rethink your life. Frankly, I don't trust you and you know it." She pressed her lips together as if she wanted to say more, but thought better of it.

"You made that more than clear. If you talk to me….I'll eat," Wally offered. He was desperate for any company and even her relative coldness was better than staring up at the ceiling and being miserable and alone. "Okay?"

Aunt Iris's look darkened. "No more manipulations. You don't do things for reward anymore. You follow orders. You better have this shake down before an hour or you're going back on nutrition. And if you dare try and lie to me…" she threatened, before turning away. She didn't like threatening him, she had never been good at discipline. Uncle Barry had always handled that all too well. "I…suppose I better wait and make sure."

Wally's shoulder's slumped as he picked up the glass and put it to his lips. Having all this anger directed towards him was making him feel horrible. "So, that's all I am now? A liar?" he demanded, blinking back more tears. His family was treating him like a pariah. "If I don't obey orders, you'll put me in a straitjacket and hook me up to machines?" he demanded.

"Stop being so melodramatic. I just said you can't starve yourself." Aunt Iris shrugged. "Well, I suppose things get harder when you push people away," she said softly as she checked his temperature. She let her fingers linger a bit comfortingly.

"What's that's suppose to mean?" Wally demanded, realizing that she was saying more than she let on and giving him the subtle guilt treatment.

"Wally…please don't do this to me. I really don't want to talk about it now," Aunt Iris said. "I have had enough stress in the week and I am pregnant. I really need to relax." She did look pale, but Wally couldn't leave her there to suffer.

"You aren't sick, are you?" Wally asked. He wasn't actually that aware of how delicate women were in pregnancy, but he was not about to risk her going to the hospital because of him. "Because if I need to speed you to the hospital…I mean, I think I can try and lift you and I could try to run but I can't do both!" He was panicking now. How could he help her if he could barely get out of bed?

Aunt Iris rolled her eyes. "Will you quit this and just open your eyes? Do you get what you did? Whatever happened, you always told me the truth. We always trusted each other. And you just shut me out lately. I used to think it was because you and Barry were heroes and I was just not part of the saving the world team. So I backed off and did what I could to support you both. But now I realize you have shut everyone out. And I just don't get it. What did I do wrong?" she asked, her voice shaking slightly.

Wally held out his arms for a hug. And of course, he had managed to hurt his aunt as well in this whole process. "I'm a jerk. You know that I don't deserve you," he whispered. She had done so much for him, she had always believed in him when he needed her and she had taken him when he had been orphaned. He did find himself closer to Barry, but…there was no excuse for what he had done. "I guess you are easy to take for granted."

"I'm not asking for a mea culpa. I want to get back into what we had. I want you to start talking to me. I know I can't break the speed barrier, but I am your legal guardian and I need to be in touch. So if you want to regain my trust…you need to promise you will let me back in," Aunt Iris said, enveloping him in a warm hug.

"Thank you," Wally said gratefully. One down and a few more to go. He'd apologize to Superman and Robin and his uncle and then he would have his life back, as soon as he figured out how to put Jinx back into it. He had no fear of her in prison, she had spent half her childhood there and she most likely found it to be a comforting place. He still had to know why she had spilled the beans, but he would forgive her eventually. He would have really prefered she had used a modicum of common sense but he would show patience with her. Okay, he'd yell at her a little and then he'd forgive her.

"But remember that you need to earn it. I need your honesty. Because you're scaring me. Sleeping with villains, lying to everyone. I mean, what the hell has gotten into you?" she demanded, not couching her language anymore. "If your father was around…" she trailed off.

Wally rolled his eyes. "He'd be disappointed in me and say how he's sorry I was born," he said, burying his head in her shoulder. "You told me about the time he caught you sneaking back into the house, that he took Dad's belt and made sure you couldn't sit down for a week. You told me what a battle ax he was. " He resented the men in his life always controlling his life. He could never make them happy. "And I thought Barry was supposed to be different. All calm and chill from Iowa, the type not to fly off the handle and go lock down on me."

"You know you could push a nun to swearing," Aunt Iris reminded him "I've been married to Barry for six years and the only times I've ever seen him ever raise his voice is at you. And even then, it's only when you have actively gone beyond the pale of sheer stupidity."

"You know, I thought you were starting to be on my side," Wally sighed. "So, he's still not speaking to me?" he asked. This was painful. He craved speaking to his uncle, getting absolution and finding out how he could regain his world again. Both of them were a package deal and even though he was weakening her resolve, he needed to win his uncle over to gain her love back.

"Well, his grad students are working around the clock. He decided to spring a thirty page paper, claiming young people today had too much free time on their hands and needed to learn old fashioned values of honesty and hard. If a group of furious geeks come after you, do not blame me," Aunt Iris said wrly. "And speak of the devil. He'll be home soon. Sorry, 24601 but I think it's best we not be seen talking when Barry gets back. You're still on the chopping block till he comes home and deals with you. I'm not supposed to be coddling you until then."

Wally clutched her. "Does he have to isolate me from everyone?" he demanded. "Can't you do anything?" He was always given so much leeway by his family. Other Titans grew up orphaned or were raised by a guardian. Wally was one of the few Titans who even had a living mother figure. It was strange for him to feel abandoned and alone by his loved ones. They were always showering him with affection, how could they deny him it when he needed it the most?

"Iris, darling? Are you home?" a pleasant male voice said, coming into the home. The warden was back and Wally was supposed to be in his room, thinking about what he had done and not getting coddled. Still, he could try clinging to her and hope she stayed for a few more moments. "I need to speak to you."

Aunt Iris was torn for a short moment of hope before shaking her head and again removing her hand. "Coming, Barry," she called, ending any notions that she'd allow him a little bit of freedom. "I'm sorry but until you make it right with your other legal guardian and your mentor, I am going to do something. I am going to allow you experience what you wanted, being left alone to work out your problems without help. Now, finish your homework and I might sneak you some ice cream," she said, as she patted his head and walked out, locking the door behind her. That hurt. He was still too weak to move much, he wasn't going anymore. They really didn't need to keep the door locked.

Wally lay back miserably and did something he rarely did. "Father in Heaven, if you wouldn't mind giving me some guidance right now, I'd sincerely appreciate it. I mean, let's not forget that I have always served you and done your will by kicking the unholy asses of bad guys. So if you wouldn't mind doing some work and making my life less of a living hell, I would certainly appreciate it. I mean, you know, as your servant, I think you owe me quite a bit. Do you know how many people would be hurt if it wasn't for me?" he demanded. "A lot. So would you mind getting your divine self in gear and bailing out a fellow do-gooder?"

He was starting to remember why he flunked out of bible school. Or why God seemed to make problems crop up in his path. He wasn't very good at this whole "righteous" act. He was currently just a messed up kid who had the ability to move faster than the eye could see who just wanted to make sense of his life. Was that too much to ask for?


Jinx paced in her cell, trying to avoid the urge to skip and dance the Horah. She had to find a way to get in contact with her boyfriend. She could smooth this over, she just had to find him and apologize and say she had been drugged. He had swallowed her lies before, he would believe her now. Soon, she would run her fingers through his red hair and be happy again.

Wally had become an accomplished liar under her care. He would be able to make them believe he was a helpless cripple who was hurt in a car accident. Just because she had revealed his secret identity didn't mean he was out of the game. No one would believe her, they'd call her a liar. And he would bide his time and sneak out. And then he would come for her, her White Knight who annoyed her but made her head spin. He would come for her. He had never let her down. He had always been there for her these last few months.

She remembered every inch of him, from the top of his red head to his freckled skin and big blue eyes to his strong muscular body to his cute toes. She remembered how happy she felt when he held her close and carried her around. She remembered watching his naked body next to her and not being able to wait to really sleep with him.

They would be together. Barry Allen couldn't keep them apart, he would find out the truth and toss Wally out on the streets, where he would be helpless and need her. Slade had not managed to kill their love, Wally had wonderfully survived. She just had to be patient until she had a chance to break out and find him. Then he would take her in his arms and hold her close and she would be horribly torn again, blessed confusion and duel loyalty. The ghost of Wally was gone, soon she would have the real thing back in her life.

Now, her time here almost felt like a vacation. Maybe Wally's family would push him away and then he would run off with her. Then everything would finally work out and she would have him all to herself. He would go to the Dark side with her and she would mend his broken heart. They would be a team so strong, no one would ever hurt her again. Layla and Wally would be a couple and they would rent a cute little villa and commit evil crimes and rule the world. And every day, he would keep her company. She would never be alone or sad again.

"Hello Layla," a calm voice said, as the buzzer announced someone was entering her cell. Quiet footsteps clicked across the floor, making Jinx very uncomfortable as her happy thoughts were disturbed. Couldn't she enjoy her gloating in peace?

"Who are you?" she demanded, turning to the intruder while plotting how to break his neck as soon as she was escaped. She was a busy woman in love, she didn't have time for interruptions while she plotted escape and a trip to Central City to pick up her paramour.

"I'm Dr. Jonathan Crane. How are you feeling today?" asked a handsome young man, thin faced and pale. He was wearing a white coat, which seemed to swamp his lanky frame. She could take him in a fight easily, if she wasn't handcuffed. What was it with this prison and all of the hot geeks?

"Pretty wonderful. And I don't need a check up," Jinx spat. She would have blasted him, but the power blocker on her prevented him from giving the dimwit his just desserts. She had screwed her boyfriend's life to hell twice in two weeks. She was really not in the mood for suffering fools gladly. "And you know where you can stick the lollipop." That was a good insult, she was pretty proud.

"I'm sorry to hear that. And I'm a psychiatrist, not a pediatrician. There are others on the staff to see that your physical well-being is adequately maintained." A pair of piercing blue eyes, masked by bifocals stared out from that pale face. "I'm more concerned with your mind. I've come a long way to see it." The way he said that, with a faint hunger in his words made Jinx's hair stick up.

"Well, then mind your own business." It was a bad pun, but acceptable under the circumstances. Jinx wasn't exactly in her best form right now. She could think of insults during her time in forced isolation. "I'm fine. A little evil, but fully sane."

"A pun. Very amusing. So, we have you accused of larceny, arson, murder, and a number of other crimes. You're quite a busy young lady," Dr. Crane said softly, completely ignoring her barbs. He peered at her, giving her the impression that he was plotting evil things in his head. She had a bad vibe off him.

"I try my best," Jinx said icily, turning her head from him so she wouldn't have to look into those weird blue eyes. Did this guy ever blink? That was really starting to spook her out. "I'm just a bad bad girl who can't help herself. So go write a paper on my delinquency and leave me alone. I don't have anything to say to you."

"Oh, I think you have plenty to tell me," the doctor said, handing her a piece of paper. He then removed his glasses, allowing a view of his piercing blue eyes. Neatly typed was the following words.

I am the Scarecrow. I represent Slade. For wounding Kid Flash, your life is spared. For failing to kill him or get his communicator, your mind is mine.

Layla looked up in terror. "I'll scream." She knew all about the Scarecrow, she had studied all about him. He used toxins that cause his victims to hallucinate that their phobias have come to life. He was a master of mind control that could instill fear in all who saw him. He was the worst of the worst. And after all she had done for Slade, he had delivered her into his hands. "If you touch me, I'll scream as loud as I can."

Dr. Crane smiled wolfishly, a smile that didn't show any of his teeth. He ran his fingers through his hair as he studied here. "Yes, my dear. You will. You'll be heading to Arkham where we can have nice long talks about what makes such a fascinating young girl tick. I trust it will be very educational. I plan to get to know you very well," he said softly, as the note dissolved in her hands. "You never know, you might enjoy our talks."

"I was loyal, I did whatever I could," Jinx said, backing up against the wall. "You have no right to do this to me." For a few glorious hours, things had finally been working out in her favor. She should have known something would go wrong and horribly so. She was bad luck to everyone, including herself. "I followed all of his orders."

"That's the sad thing about medicine. It has to be taken exactly as ordered, no more and no less. Otherwise, it can prove fatal. And sadly, you didn't obey the doctor's orders," Dr. Crane said, a slight Irish accent tinting his words and making them far more menacing.

"I'm not going to Arkham. I'm a juvenile. I'm going to get a few years and then I'll be free," Jinx said, gritting her teeth. She would not submit. She would not let them see her frightened. She would be strong. "So you are going to have to wait to get your claws into me." And before she let herself get captured by him, she'd put a bullet in her head.

"How naïve of you. You killed quite a few people. And you seemed to have angered a very important person. The city criminology expert has ruled that you are a danger to the people of the city. And of course, I'll be recommending you have private therapy with me to help you deal with these murderous tendencies. Between my testimony and the testimony of Dr. Barry Allen, I think I'll have you all to myself soon enough. He's the one who called me in. He feels you are a special threat who needs to be dealt with appropriately."

"Dr. Allen's working for Slade?" Jinx whispered, a terror grabbing her throat. She couldn't believe that uptight jerk was a villain, but who would have thought the head of Arkham was working for the criminals? If Allen was truly evil, Wally was better off dead than what was happening to him right now. She had managed to kill him anyway and it was not even a credit to her name.

Dr. Crane laughed. "That's absurd. Dr. Barry Allen is an esteemed member of the scientific community, who would never dirty his hands with anything less than perfect honesty. I doubt he has any wish in life but to eradicate crime. He wouldn't even have the imagination to do crime. He's so honest, he wasn't even nice enough to share your testimony with him to me." Oh good. So at least he was safe for now. "Well, I'll have to gain your trust and worm it out of you somehow," he said, replacing his glasses with a content air. It didn't hide his true evil anymore. A pity no one suspected the geeks, they had a lot more power than people gave them credit for. "Some say I'm very easy to talk to. And I think you really need to unburden yourself a bit."

Jinx was feeling sick to her stomach. She had tried to kill her boyfriend and all for nothing. Her life was still over. She had no idea Wally's uncle was so powerful and all she had done was antagonize him. Even if Wally wasn't dead yet, it was only a matter of time before she was forced to spill her guts literally. "I still know," she whispered, trying to calm her breathing. She had to keep thinking, stay alert, and choose any opening she had to stay alive.

"Don't bother telling people your lies. No one will believe you. After all, you're the little demon who burnt down a building and killed a mother with two children. Everyone knows you're evil. They'll just think you are delusional or trying to do anything to get your way. It won't work. Everyone has seen the tape of you running away from the fire. The evening news called you a sociopath." He smiled. "Seeing you here, I somehow doubt the pop psychology diagnosis. I look at you and I know you for what you are."

"I'm someone you don't want as your enemy," Jinx threatened. All she needed was one second without a power inhibitor and she'd mess up his pretty features for him.

Dr. Crane laughed coldly. "Hardly. You're an angry little girl who wants to pretend she's a big bad villain and make everyone fear her, so that no one can break your heart. And even when you let someone get close to you, you will always choose yourself. You have much potential, but you really have a long way to go before I can pronounced you cured," he said, appraising her with a look of amusement. His smug smile made her skin crawl.

"I'm cured. I've seen the light. I want to go good and become a police informant. I'll surrender all of my information," Jinx said, suddenly having the idea. "I'll plea bargain." If the criminals would turn on her, she would return the favor and save her own life. No one could fault her resourceful nature.

"It's a bit late for that. No one would ever believe you've suddenly turned to the side of good. Dr. Allen said you have no chance of rehabilitation, that you're a danger to society and he wants you locked away as soon as possible." Jinx gasped. She hadn't realize what depths Allen would stoop to keep her away from Wally. He would have made an excellent villain, he was quite crafty for a lab scientist data cruncher. "Appears you threatened his family and he had to put them under protection. He got your trial moved up so he could make sure you are in Arkham as quickly as possible. You made a powerful enemy, young lady. In short, you and I will be getting to know each other very well."

Jinx closed her eyes, trying to hide her trembling. She could feel tears spring to her eyes. She was fifteen and in a few short weeks, she was going to die. She was going to rot in this cell, and wait for the end to come. It seemed to be the perfectly unlucky end to a perfectly unlucky girl. No villain would help her escape and heroes would kill her on sight .

"I know you aren't looking forward to my help. But if you submit nicely, I'll be as gentle as possible. You could be reconditioned, made to be useful to society. It's your choice," Dr. Crane said softly. "I think I am done with my evaluation. Rest well. I like my patients well rested. Their minds are too easy to mold when they are tired."

Jinx closed her eyes. "I won't let you break me," she whispered. She would get Wally's help, he wouldn't let this happen to her. He would break her out of prison and he would protect her. He loved her.

"Barry Allen mentioned you were a challenge. I suppose he was right. But I'm not worried. I like my girls feisty. Keep that attitude. It will make you so much more fun," Scarecrow said, as he walked out of the cell. He whistled a tune from Gilbert and Sullivan as he walked down the halls, to plot evil even she found obscene. This guy creeped her out, badly. "We are going to have so much together, I promise. I think I have quite enough to make my diagnosis."

Jinx shuddered, and fell into her cot, feeling all alone in the world. If she didn't prove herself to be innocent, she would be worse than dead. "Wally…come find me. Where are you?" she whispered, her heart beating in her ears. If Scarecrow tortured her, she'd reveal his identity. And then she would have killed him just as much as if she would have set the fire. And this time, it wouldn't even help her.

And that thought bothered her. She wanted Wally to live so badly. Maybe it was a selfish thought that she wanted help, but she wanted him so badly that it actually hurt. She craved him the way she used to crave power, she ached when she thought he was gone. She had gone and done everything she had sworn never to do. She wholeheartedly cared about someone else!

She was broken as a villain. And soon, she'd be broken as a person as well. Barry Allen obviously was going to keep Wally away from her and Wally might not be able to escape. Both of them would be hunted down and killed.

She found herself laughing hysterically. Bad luck had struck again. She wasn't even surprised anymore. She was cursed and she didn't even have Wally's ghost to keep her company anymore. He was alive and most likely unaware that she had just damned them both.

She knew her letters would be monitored. But she had to make an effort to try and reach out to Wally, to warn him. That much…was legal.

Wally,

Please come to me. I need to talk to you. I can explain everything. I love you. Don't leave me here to die, on the shore stranded,

Layla

AN-Wally's note from Layla has a quote from the song they heard on their first date, to remind him he loves her. And yes, thank you to Cillian Murphy, for inspiring me with the great Jonathan Crane he created, who made me shiver in terror. And that was not a twist you expected, no?