I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. This story just scrolls through random moments so much that when I found myself writing serious things I surprised even myself. Here's the next chapter, with random serious moments mixed in
Naruto stared ahead of him, his body posture rigid and his glare resolute. Unflinching, the boy kept his gaze forward, refusing to blink or even move, for fear that the man in front of him might disappear.
The man standing across from him, for his part, tried his best to return the gesture. Instead of his glare being intense however, it was little more than lazy, bordering on sleepy.
Truly Kakashi had no idea what was going on, but he was sure that it wasn't anything he wanted to do with.
Now somewhere in the back of the Jonin's head he could realize that the child in front of him -dressed in all orange with whisker marks on his cheeks- could easily be assumed as one of his "students." There were probably about two to three people in all of the Hidden Leaf Village who wore orange, and judging from recent reports about the boy's newly gained technique, almost all of those people were probably the child as well.
This being said the one eyed man could not for the life of him figure out why exactly said student was here. Kakashi was currently standing at the Memorial Site, a place where no student Naruto's age had any need to be, trying his best to pay respects to his fallen teammates and sensei: The Fourth Hokage of The Village Hidden in the Leaves.
Come to think of it, the boy looked eerily like the Fourth. Maybe his son? Almost definitely. Huh, look at that.
Anyway, he was trying his best to pay his respects: a feat he did religiously and only when someone important needed his time elsewhere. The penance for their deaths fell heavily on his heart, and he damn sure couldn't bear the weight of such guilt himself. Therefore he would grieve for them for other people as well and consider the hours, sometimes even days, of their lives he wasted as a small payment.
It was the least he could do.
So with this in mind the ninja decided to be only two hours late to pick up his cute little prospective students. Unfortunately one of them seemed to have come to him. Early, at that. It was after several long moments more -in which he hoped the kid would leave- that Kakashi decided to break the silence that the young ninja brought with him.
"So what can I do for you?" Kakashi drawled, his hand starting to reach for the orange book that he had in a pocket near his thigh. It was getting to the point where he was pretty sure he was more known for it than the Sharingan under his headband.
Kakashi shrugged and pulled it out anyway. So be it. There were worse monikers.
The rather small boy responded to his question with a chuckle. Looking left and right for reasons the jonin couldn't fathom (he had followed the action with his own eye faster than most would perceive) the small genin prospect simply proceeded to stretch his hands over his head. Nothing really out of the ordinary. No, the words he said next were what toppled the man.
"Its not your fault," the boy remarked.
Kakashi raised his eyebrow, "excuse me?"
"Its not your fault," the boy repeated, an almost bored expression on his face, "the death of your teammate, Obito; and your teammate, Rin. Their deaths aren't your fault."
Kakashi wasn't sure he heard the boy right. Unless he was going crazy, there was absolutely no way the boy could have known that kind of information. That or he was going deaf. He decided he was going deaf. He stuck his pinky in his ear to make sure they were clean. Deciding they were, he turned back to the boy, who was now stretching before him.
"Excuse me?" the man asked again.
Naruto rolled his eyes.
"I SAID," the boy exclaimed. His voice was very audibly annoyed, "The death of your teammate Obito under that terrible cave-in at the hands of various enemy ninja which resulted in you having to inherit his Sharingan, as well as the subsequent death of your teammate Rin Nohara's death at your own hand," literally, Naruto left out, "is not your fault. It was out of your hands. You did all that you could."
Kakashi blinked. Okay, so he had heard right. It didn't explain how the kid knew what he did, unless…
Naruto watched as Kakashi's face scrolled from surprised, to incredulous, to downright furious. The orange book his teacher frequented snapped shut with a very audible "snap". Any amount of mirth the man once had at seeing him before had dropped immediately, and with the hand he had been using to hold his smut book, the man slowly reached for his headband. He was likely to prepare his famed ocular power.
And it was for this very reason that Naruto smiled.
"I don't know who you are or who hired you," Kakashi said, a hint of steel in his voice, "but your decision to confront me directly and reveal such information was a terrible decision on your part." It was at this time that Kakashi had just lifted his headband, and it was at this time that Naruto had finally gotten what he wanted.
You see, being best friends and rivals with a person who owned not one, but two legendary and powerful bloodline limits made friendly bouts extremely difficult. While Naruto was not in any way weak, when fighting against someone who could not only fight on par with him, but tiptoe through different dimensions as well as summon meteors, one learned that a trump card was something that needed to be in effect.
If not only to win those friendly bouts.
This in mind, Naruto had found a way to counter not only the Sharingan, but the Rinnegan years before his jump through time. Not only did this method work, but it worked on eyes much stronger and advanced than the one in front of him. Crossing his fingers, the boy did the one technique that he knew to work on even the mightiest of gods.
"Harem No Jutsu!" Naruto screamed.
And his scarecrow teacher, Sharingan blazing in the heat of fury, was forced to stare down the multiple bombshell women in front of him with all the intensity and focus of a man determined to take apart a traitor. He had dove into a charge the instant his eye was unveiled, only for the blonde to be enveloped in smoke and replaced by this… horde… of woman an instant later. His eye, completely unbidden, darted over and traced every inch and curve and the wall of feminine perfection before him. With this all beautifully committed to memory, Kakashi couldn't even close his eyes to rid himself of the blood filled knockout coming, because his Sharingan had already memorized and readily supplied the images to his mind's eye.
Kakashi was knocked out on sight, which left Naruto free to do with him as he pleased.
The blonde boy smiled.
Later
Naruto trudged on through the streets of Konoha, his sensei lobbed haphazardly over his back and his eyes staring straight forward. Given the large gap between their ranks, with Naruto being barely a Genin and Kakashi being an experienced Jonin, not a single person batted an eye. They all assumed that everything was okay as there was no way Naruto could hurt the silver haired man. About halfway to the acadamy, Kyuubi decided to make himself known.
"So, did you really think it was wise to tell all those things to your sensei?" Kurama mused from his lounge inside Naruto, "he might catch onto the fact we're not from this time."
At this Naruto shrugged, "so?"
Kurama raised an eyebrow, "what do you mean, 'so'?"
"I mean, 'so'. There is no reason for me to fear of them knowing. We never tried to hide anything at all in the first place. If they ever do find out about what we really are, great, we get to sway from the path and fuck with the higher beings that dropped us here. Chances are however that whatever I do will instantly have damage control run and nothing will leave any lasting effect whatsoever. Case in point-"
Naruto lobbed a kunai straight between the eyes of a passing man. He continued with Kakashi in tow as if nothing happened.
"Damn kid, that's harsh," Kyuubi muttered.
"You've EATEN people since we've gotten here!" Naruto yelled.
"Yeah, but that's EXPECTED of me!" the fox retorted, "YOU are Mister Goody Stand With My Friends! I didn't expect it in you."
Naruto shrugged, a habit he seemed to be doing a lot lately. This habit was made even harder with Kakashi taking up one half of his shoulders, but he managed. "Eh, being in a timeless wonder zone has dulled my ethics a bit. Sue me."
"How did you even find out about this?" Kyuubi asked. He didn't make note of it, but in the few meters Naruto had managed to drag Kakashi, the man with the kunai in his head had been healed and set back to work as if nothing happened. Without turning the future Hokage placed another kunai through his ear. It buried up to the handle and went out the other side. The man promptly collapsed.
"I'd gotten bored. I never missed my paperwork as Hokage, but at least it gave me something to do when I ran out. If not that I could punish Bolt or snuggle Himawari. Worst case scenario I could go to Hinata and SHE could-"
Kyuubi stopped him right there, "Nope. Don't need to know."
Naruto looked confused, "why? She could ask Sakura to point me to where Sasuke was so we could spar."
Kyuubi stared, "figures the only reason you would get a mate would be to get easier access to the boy."
Naruto nodded, ignoring whatever implications the Kyuubi meant.
"My point is, there is no reason for us to fear anything because absolutely nothing is permanent."
Kyuubi scrunched up his face in confusion. Despite the fox being a rather large beast of admitted violence and hatred it sorta looked cute. "You sure? I'm pretty sure Mizuki is fully dead."
Naruto stopped, pondering the circumstance. After a minute of blocking traffic he continued walking.
"I'm sure he'll be fine."
It took another ten minutes, but the duo of student and unconscious teacher made their way to the academy. Naruto was short several kunai and shuriken, but he figured since he was no longer bored, everything worked out. After kicking in the door, Naruto walked in rather happily, before dumping his future teacher in a corner. This brought more than a few stares from the students sitting inside, as well as a freshly recovered Iruka, but if Naruto noticed he didn't show it. Swiftly, he made his way to the back of the class and sat down next to a flustered Hinata Hyuuga.
"Sup sweet cheeks?" Naruto flirted, trying to make his prepubescent voice as husky as possible. He failed utterly. This being the case, Hinata still could barely handle being in the same room as the orange wearing boy, so to have him not only in such close proximity but TALKING to her was enough to knock her out. Naruto fixed her so that she wouldn't sprain her neck.
"I missed that," Naruto said with a sigh, putting his head on the desk in order to appreciate how cute his wife used to be. Not cute in an adult way though. Cute in a puppy way. "Why I was so fixated on Sakura back then puzzles me even now."
Kyuubi rumbled, "I can see why you hadn't noticed her. She was so pathetically weak back then. This is too far of a cry from the beast of a woman she became in the future. Bah."
Naruto chuckled, "does the big bad Kyuubi miss little old Mrs. Uzumaki?"
"I wouldn't go so far as to say 'miss'. I miss no one but maybe the Old Man. No, I miss the things she did. First off, she kept your orange wearing figure clean. It shouldn't take me threatening you with a Bijuu Bomb to get you to touch your shower faucet."
"I almost didn't even do it then. I needed something to fight."
"She kept you in line. Not one day from her you've started killing civilians."
"To be fair, I'm a ninja. It's in my job description. Even if it wasn't, I'd probably do it anyway since they can't actually die."
"I think you charged up chakra for as much as you could and threw it in a line. It went straight through the Hokage Mountain."
"Oh right," Naruto said, his eyes opening. At some point he had started to fall asleep. "I wonder where that kunai is now."
Elsewhere, a multi-Bijuu powered kunai pierced the head of Hidan, the Jashin Priest. It's work done here, the blade continued unabated.
Its thirst for blood would not be sated here today.
"I bet it didn't even hit anything yet," Naruto mused. Kyuubi rolled his eyes at how easy his charge was taking this.
"There are easier ways to fuck with the gods, child."
"True," the Uzumaki answered, "but I enjoy the sweeter things in life."
Even Later
The three students; Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura, sat on a bench on the roof of their Academy. In front of them stood a slightly flustered Kakashi. He was tired and his head hurt something fierce, but there he was. Completely on time.
"And you're sure that's what happened?" the man asked the orange ninja sitting before him.
"Definitely," Naruto answered, his smile bright enough to power generators, "I found you in the middle of the forest, knocked out with a huge smile on your face. You looked peaceful, so I wanted to put you in a place where I get my best sleep. The answer to that being, of course, the Academy classroom. That you just so happened to be our Jonin teacher was coincidental."
"I see," the scarecrow responded. "Very well, let's go over our introductions, shall we?" The man continued. He was tempted to reach into his pouch to get his book, but recent odd blackouts made him decide to rethink that plan.
He may need to lay off the stuff if it was going to make him randomly black out like that.
"Uh, sensei? How should we do this?" the pink haired girl asked after some time. The Jonin could hear the trepidation in her voice, but decided not to comment on it. He would beat her doubt out of her head if she ever became his student.
"Well, I'll go first," Kakashi answered. "My name is Kakashi Hatake. I have many interests, and just as many hobbies. I don't fear a lot of things, at least, I don't remember. I don't have a lot of goals left, but I don't think I regret anything either. That's about it for me. What about you guys?"
Sasuke and Sakura stared at the man. All they really knew about the man was his name. Upon seeing that they weren't going to go anywhere with this, Kakashi spoke up for them.
"I think we'll start with you, pink hair. What's up with you?"
"Oh… Oh!" Sakura eeped, not expecting to be put on the spot. After clearing her throat and looking lovingly to her left -Sasuke- and disdainfully to her right -Naruto- the girl finally responded.
"I… am interested in a certain boy," the kunoichi started, before sneaking a glance at Sasuke, "and my hobby is reading books on becoming a better ninja. I think I'm afraid of making my parents disappointed in me, though they say that they would never be and that just getting this far would already be more than they expected. My goal is to be the wife of a certain someone," this comment was meant with a glance to her left again, which served little more than to annoy the Uchiha, "and to avoid another certain someone," with which she looked right. This glance was met with another smile, which put off Sakura's bad intentions. It was hard to keep a bad mood under such a genuine smile.
And to Naruto, it was of course a genuine smile. He was intensely and eternally grateful for the friends he had made throughout his life. Just because they were 13 again and could no longer remember anything of their times together meant nothing. He was happy to see them. Of course, none of this meant anything in the end. Sakura couldn't continue to berate the boy when such joy was being directed at her.
"and my regret..." Sakura continued after the effects of the smile wore off. She paused for a moment, as if considering what her answer would be before finally answering a minute later.
"I regret not being able to stop some of the atrocious things that happened in Konohagakure."
At this statement, both Naruto and Sasuke turned their heads.
Kakashi raised his eyebrow.
"Oh really?" Kakashi stated, his curiosity peaked, "Atrocious things? Like what? We're a ninja village you know. Atrocities are our trade."
At that, Sakura shook her head. "I-I know that we as… as ninja… are supposed to do some less that admirable things. We might k-kill people and stuff, and it is definitely in the job description, but some of the things that happened here don't deserve to be visited upon anyone. Things like the Kyuubi attack and the Uchiha Massacre. If I were born a little earlier, or had been a little stronger, I would have been able to do something… anything… to stop them. It's not fair. So many lives were lost and futures destroyed. What makes it worse is that both of these events happened one after the other. I regret not being able to help."
Naruto blinked. "Well, that's new," Naruto thought.
"Did that not happen?"
"No, she kinda just ragged on me and drooled on Sasuke," Naruto thought about it for a second, "so nothing new really."
"Maybe she just never got around to saying what she really felt last time. Admit it, if you had a choice between declaring your love for Hinata to her or saying your dreams which would you choose with a limited time slot?"
Naruto chuckled, "is that even a question? Both. 'I love you Hinata cause I'll be Hokage dattebayo!'"
Kyuubi just smirked.
"And what about you, Mr. Energetic?" Kakashi continued, gesturing to the Uchiha. Said Uchiha, with his hands folded and his chin resting upon them, simply glared up at his teacher.
"I don't really care about any of those things you said. I only have one goal, and that's to-"
"Drone on and one about being sad. Sheesh, we get it. Life sucks. Move on," Naruto interrupted, his hands behind his head now. Kicking up his feet, the blonde boy laid back to start cloud watching.
"Excuse me?" Sasuke asked, surprise taking the seat for now. Surely his deep seated anger would return later. Right now questions needed to be answered.
"Listen," Naruto started. He looked up, eyes roaming the sky, "I know life is hard for you. Believe me, it hasn't been the best for me either."
"In this life and the last."
"But sitting around and wallowing about it isn't going to help anything." The boy then took a deep breath, closing his eyes once more and taking in the intricacies of life. Upon reopening them, he continued to stare at the clouds, though with a renewed vigor. "Get stronger, get faster, do what you have to do. Its fine to be fully focused on whatever the hell it is that you want to, but that doesn't mean you have to ignore everything else along the way." From this, the boy continued to cloud watch for a few minutes. After a few minutes of silence, he looked down to see three pairs of widened eyes.
"Did I say something?" Naruto thought.
"They're just surprised that you have a thought process," Kyuubi responded.
"Oh fuck off," Naruto responded to that.
Sasuke was the first to respond, his anger easily overwhelming his shock. His glare intensified on the boy before him, before closing and turning back forward, facing the Jonin.
"Whatever. I don't expect you to understand me."
Naruto chuckled, causing the Uchiha to turn back to him. "I understand you better than anyone else in the world, bastard. You may not think so now; you may not want to admit it, but you know that you and I share a certain kind of pain. You know we share loneliness. You want to bottle it all up, and take responsibility for all of the bad things that resonate within you. I don't know, maybe you think it's because its some sort of 'right' thing to do. But its not. You don't have to do any of this alone. I don't know what made you think that, but you don't. Just think about it a bit. Why would the answer to the pain and loneliness you feel be isolating yourself?"
And it was the end of this mini speech that the rooftop was left once again in silence. Naruto didn't notice. He had gone back to cloud watching.
"I can see why Shikamaru does this so often," Naruto commented, more to himself than anyone else. Kyuubi wasn't on board with the subject change.
"Brat, did you just use the Talk no Jutsu?" Kyuubi asked. His voice was slightly quivered. The use of that technique was fearful to experience, even if you weren't its intended target.
Just being witness to it bore effects.
Naruto shook his head. "No. That was about the power of a quarter of its ability. I wouldn't use it just for our meeting. I just needed to get those words out to Sasuke before it was too late. I hadn't perfected Talk until after Sasuke had already run off to Orochimaru, so I couldn't convince him to stay when it really mattered. Now that I have perfected it, I wanted to test it real quick. See if it could change anything. What do you think?" Naruto asked while turning his head to look at Sasuke so Kurama could get a look.
The boy was shellshocked. His face was white and devoid of emotion. Regardless, one could see the internal struggle as new thoughts and emotions cycled through his mind.
"I think there's a reason Tsunade banned that jutsu."
"Oh its not that bad."
Meanwhile, elsewhere
"This is really, really bad," Hagoromo stated from his viewing spot in the timeless zone. Rinnegan activated, the Sage could see the higher deities using the fullest extent of their powers to alter the path of the first meeting of Team 7 back to what it was before. Despite their best efforts however, the region around their residence just would not revert. It was somehow resisting the influence of the very beings that created it, and that was a worrying revelation.
"There is no way that this boy has created a technique that powerful," the Sage stated, his voice shaking. "This Talk no Jutsu… maybe Neji was right. Maybe this technique really is powerful enough to alter the world better than even the gods.
Back there
After recovering from their second shock of the day (with Sasuke still deep in thought) the crew on the roof came to the last member of their team. After surviving the first two students however, Kakashi was unsure whether or not he was emotionally prepared to face this boy.
"And… you… Orange kid?" Kakashi asked, trepidation now apparent in his voice.
Naruto, his smile amplitude now cranked up past a million, cleared his throat and sat up. Looking from Sakura; who was slightly shivering, to Sasuke; who flinched a bit despite still being in his daze; to finally Kakashi who was utterly mortified, Naruto somehow flared his smile to dangerous levels before starting his introduction.
"My name is N-"
An hour later
"And now you're not allowed to introduce yourself anymore," the Kyuubi barked out between fits of laughter. He didn't need to breathe, yet somehow found himself struggling to find some air. Naruto could only scowl as he looked down at the pack of cards in his hand.
"I don't think they needed to make me ninja introduction cards though. This is just excessively extra," he turned the card over, "I didn't even think the concept of "ninja introduction cards" existed."
Kyuubi, who was now rolling on the floor of Naruto's gut, stopped his laughing just long enough to answer. "They didn't! They were made specifically for you!" This revelation only seemed to worsen Naruto's mood.
"Wait, so you're saying that the words on these cards weren't stock phrases?"
"Nope. Made custom for you. I don't think these words could fit to anyone else."
"That's stupid!"
"Shh, human. Don't give away everything on the card."
