And thus, having snuck away from the theater (though only on a temporary basis) Jack and Elizabeth began the epic journey in restoring the narrator!

ES: 'As loath as I am to admit that I trust you Jack, that trust only goes so far. It was fun to get away from the theater, but why are we in this canyon?'

JS: 'I honestly couldn't tell ya Lizzie.'

It holds what you need to restore the narrator! Your DESTINATION!

ES: 'And that worries me, you've been acting so funny lately… I admit I like the feeling of doing things without it being narrated first.'

And the pair approached a large crack in the canyon wall, opening up into a cavern.

JS: 'I wish I knew the feeling…'

ES: 'What do you mean?'

JS: 'Into the cave, Lizzie.'

ES: 'You first…'

It's your own fault she doesn't trust you, you know.

ES: 'Jack, are you hurt?'

JS: 'No, why?'

ES: 'You're gritting your teeth.'

JS: 'Am I?'

And now, you have come to your first obstacle.

ES: 'There's an opening in the back of this cave. It's covered with cobwebs and I feel a sense of foreboding when I go near it.'

JS: 'Well, let's go forward. Ain't much of an obstacle.'

Stop! It is very dangerous. You'll get sliced to bits, you must heed this warning and-

JS: 'Sliced to bits? As in machinery will get us? How old is this place, it would all be broken or turned to dust.'

ES: 'Sliced..? Jack, who are you talking to?'

Logic doesn't matter here- now listen to the warning-

JS: 'Bloody hell, if logic doesn't matter I'm going to skip ahead and rewrite the story.'

What? You can't-

ES: 'Jack? Jack where did you go?'


(JS: 'Look at this bollocks....)

Only the penitent man will pass…

JS: 'Penitent? Sounds like penance…'

ES: 'You worry me sometimes, Jack.'

JS: 'When you pay penance don't you kneel?'

ES: 'I suppose…Jack! What are you doing? I thought you mentioned slicing when you- oh my God. Jack, are you alright?'

JS: 'S'alright Lizzie, I've jammed the gears, the blades aren't moving now. You can just walk through.'

(JS: 'An there we are, all rounded up and gotten rid of.)


Succumb to age, the gears and blades of the mechanism have long since rusted and rotted away.

ES: 'Thank God Jack, where did you go?'

JS: 'I wasn't gone long, was I?'

ES: 'Um, not really.'

JS: 'Right. Let's go.'

ES: 'But.. Slicing!'

JS: 'Took care of it. See? I'm goin' first.'

ES: 'Oh, well. What was the mention of all that slicing early?'

JS: 'Ignore it like you do most of me luv.'

ES: 'I don't ignore you…'

Jack, you can't just.. rewrite stories! It's wrong. Immoral. Against the code of writing…

JS: 'Hm.. Is that writing on the ground?'

ES: 'I don't know, it looks like. The nondescript light from nowhere is a bit dim in this room, isn't it?'

JS: 'Hm. Wonder what happens when-'

ES: 'JACK!'

JS: 'Ah, well. I guess we're supposed to spell something…'

ES: 'With the ground crumbling away and letters on the ground, one would assume that.'

JS: 'Wonder what it is…?'

After your refusal to listen to me I refuse to give you the next clue!

JS: 'I got an idea Lizzie, I'll hold onto you and you step on the letters until you get the one that doesn't give way.'

ES: 'Alright.'

What? That's.. that's cheating.

JS: 'Pirate..'

ES: 'Jack, you're muttering to yourself again. Oh! I found it. I'm on an 'I'.'

JS: 'Hm, there's a rhyme that's 'I before e' try an 'e' next.'

ES: 'Yes, it's holding. But what after?'

JS: 'Start guessing again I suppose.'

ES: 'Ah, here we are. 'V' is next.'

JS: ''Iev'? What are we spelling…'

ES: 'Ah.'

JS: 'What?'

ES: 'Sorry, I slipped. A is next.'

JS: 'Ah.'

ES: 'What?'

JS: 'After that?'

ES: 'I'l' try 'h', you know, 'a' 'h'? ah?'

JS: 'Good thinking.'

You two have such faulty logic…

ES: 'Alright, I'm across.'

JS: 'I wonder what crocked up thing we're supposed to do next?'

ES: 'There's an opening up here, oh wow.'

JS: 'Hm? Oh.'

The leap of faith. Not something you should take lightly Jack, as-

JS: 'Oh, look. Lizzie, can you see the bridge?'

ES: 'Bridge? Jack, this is an open chasm!'

JS: 'When you look straight across it blends in, look down.'

ES: 'Wow! It stands right out against the darkness.'

JS: 'Still looks thin though, be careful when you go across.'

ES: 'I will.. wait.. did you just-'

JS: 'An I'm across! C'mon Lizzie.'

This is.. This is.. The faultiest grail quest I've ever seen!

JS: 'Grail quest?'

ES: 'Grail?'

JS: 'Did we jus' rip off Indiana Jones?!'

ES: 'Huh, we did, didn't we?'

JS: 'But.. but that's not a classic!'

ES: 'Jack, how can you say that?'

It doesn't matter, you've reached DESTINATION. The narrator will now be restored.

JS: 'What? We don't get the bloody grail?'

ES: 'What do you mean we don't get the grail?'

JS: 'Apparently we don't get the grail!'

ES: 'Wait, you can't distract me from what you said.'

JS: 'What did I say?'

ES: 'You said Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade wasn't a classic!'

JS: 'We shouldn't even be talking about this…'

ES: 'You can't suddenly stop breaking the fourth wall.'

JS: 'We're in a cave Lizzie, it isn't shaped like a box.'

ES: 'Jack! Stop doing that.'

JS: 'Doing what?'

Jack Sparrow, you are a terrible fiend.


A/N GR! The part where Jack rewrites the story was supposed to have strikeout done to it, but apparently you can no longer do that on FF. Or if you can, could someone please tell me how? Other than that, I'm actually rather happy with this chapter. Or.. epic quest, technically it isn't a chapter since the narrator isn't involved.