Hey guys! Sorry about the late submission! I found a job recently, and that with school is eating up some time. I'll do shoutouts again next chapter, whenever that comes out. Thank you for the encouragement and the reviews, and thank you for the support. Everyone who favorites and follows, I thank you.


Hiruzen steepled his hands. With his chin resting on them, he eyed the person in front of him with stern, critical eyes. Said person stared back, his both energetic and sparkling eyes coming close to disarming the aged Hokage. Shaking the feeling, the Third addressed his visitor with only a little confusion.

"So what brings you here today, Naruto?" the man known as "The Professor" asked. With a bright, alluring smile, the Genin responded.

"Is it too much to ask that I spend some time with my favorite grandfather figure?" Naruto asked. Hiruzen frowned. The only time Naruto ever referred to him as such was when he wanted something. Thinking over the events that happened in the blonde's life recently, the old man attempted to figure out what such a thing could be, so he could accurately refuse him it. If there was anything Hiruzen learned over the years, it was that when an Uzumaki wanted something, it was usually not good.

"You cannot have a free ramen coupon," Hiruzen calmly stated. When Naruto simply shook his head, Hiruzen cursed, though inwardly.

"I don't want that, Gramps. I know you can't do it anyway." Indeed, upon becoming Hokage, he tried to force Ichiraku's —which was now run by the owner's daughter, Ayame— to give him free ramen for life. Mountain destroying power or not, he was not able to survive the ladle whacking she gave him that day.

Hiruzen quirked an eyebrow at Naruto's revelation. That was a… surprisingly coherent thought. Perhaps his latest mission had opened possibilities for the young man? Speaking of which…

"You will not get another C-class mission, especially after the disaster of your last one. You seem to attract danger, and I do not need anything else so perilous to befall you."

Naruto laughed at the old man's declaration. "I don't think I'll be going on any missions anytime soon. The Chuunin Exams are right around the corner!"

Hiruzen felt a bead of sweat trill down his brow. The man had administered the event and completely forgot about it in the face of the blonde child. Picking up a random piece of paper from his desk, Hiruzen pretended to read it and come to a startling revelation.

"Hmm, oh. Ah, yes. Kakashi nominated you three and you accepted?"

"Of course!" Naruto chirped. The exam papers were still in his back pocket.

"Hmm, yes. I see. Well, good to know." Hiruzen then proceeded to light his pipe in an attempt to save face. Naruto decided to let him do so.

"Well, if you're not here for any of those reasons…" Hiruzen started, now content with chugging on his pipe. "Then why are you here?"

"What if I really did want to just spend some time with you?" Naruto asked. Hiruzen found the idea laughable.

"Because that's not who you are, Naruto," Hiruzen responded. He then stopped, took a few drags on his pipe and pondered something. Turning back to his young charge, he frowned. "You cannot learn a new jutsu from the Forbidden Scroll."

Naruto laughed. "Did you keep it in the same place?"

"Well, no." Hiruzen admitted, not at all flustered at revealing top secret information to what could possibly be the worst person in the village to reveal it to.

"Then I don't think I would have found it anyway, haha. The Shadow Clone Technique alone was enough to bore me half to death." Hiruzen nodded. He was surprised Naruto was able to sit still long enough to learn anything from it at all.

"So… why are you here?" Hiruzen asked for the third time that day.

"I just wanted to spend some time with you."

"I find that exceedingly hard to believe," Hiruzen responded. Naruto scratched his head.

"Why can't I do something without some ulterior motive?"

"I don't know, why can't you?" Hiruzen threw the question back in his face. Frowning, it took all of Naruto's will to not fly into a tangent.

"I haven't always been devious."

"One time you pretended to be devastated by the mistreatment of the villagers towards you in order to get close enough to me to steal my hat."

"To be fair, I actually was devastated. Just not enough to warrant not stealing your hat."

"One time you pretended to be interested in the ANBU task force enough for me to tell you where the paint we use to color their masks was manufactured." Hiruzen continued.

"That one wasn't even that bad!"

"Their masks were hot pink for a week, Naruto."

"So?"

"It's a matter of national security, Naruto! I couldn't use any of the new operatives after that! Do you realize how much money you cost the Village for that stunt alone?"

"No," Naruto admitted. He looked a little sheepish. "But I do know the ANBU chased me for several days after that."

"That they couldn't catch you shames me to this day."

"That's only two times," Naruto said. Hiruzen smiled.

"Do you realize we have an entire archive dedicated to you? Rows upon rows of files dedicated solely to documenting your exploits have been arranged for the sole purpose of validating this exact moment."

With a snap, hundreds of thick manila envelopes appeared in the Third Hokage's office.

"Do you wish for me to go over each one?"

Naruto shook his head violently. With another snap the documents were gone.

"Where… where was that hidden in the future? I know you've snapped in the office before. That had never happened."

"Kyuubi I just… I just don't know."

"So as you can see," Hiruzen said, quite unknowing of the conversation in Naruto's head, "you lean more towards ulterior motives than not. The only real question is what exactly it is that you're vying for."

"Maybe, this one time, I'm actually just here to see you." Naruto said. Hiruzen chuckled.

"Oh? Is that so?"

"Yeah, it is so!" Naruto yelled, slightly upset that he was being doubted.

"And what brought on this desire?" Hiruzen decided to humor the child.

"I dunno," Naruto admitted. "You never know when you might lose something. You're the only person who really cared for me for such a long time. You've been there for me since… before I can even remember really. Maybe… I dunno. Maybe I wanted to talk to you a bit? Outside of necessity or punishment?"

Hiruzen's eyes softened at the blonde's declaration. For a moment his aged visage seemed to catch up to him as the old man contemplated the words of the youth before him. For a brief moment, the desire to reach out and embrace the young man before him —the same of which he had raised from just a wee babe— almost overcame him. That moment however, was aptly brief. Recognition sparked in the aged and wizened man's eyes, and a gentle smile beseeched his face.

"This is a distraction, isn't it?" Hiruzen asked.

"Oh yeah."

And just like that an explosion sounded out somewhere near the tower. Jolting to his feet, Hiruzen rushed to his window to see multicolored particles of dust raining down in front of him.

"Is that… paint?" Hiruzen asked, only half wondering where the boy could get such an amount. The other half was completely unsurprised, because Naruto had a penchant for doing something that made no sense, so trying to apply such a concept to him was ineffectual. That being said, seeing as to where the paint and chalk dust was falling, Hiruzen had no illusions as to what was hit just now.

"Really, Naruto? The monument again?" Hiruzen asked, whirling on the spot. By the time he had turned, however, the boy was already gone.

"Oh, phooey," the ancient leader huffed. There was no use sending the ANBU to capture the Genin. The bot had already proven that he had no trouble evading the force for long. Naruto would turn up eventually, all Hiruzen would have to do was wait. Turning with the patience of a true commander, there was only one thought that rested in his mind.

"I wonder what he did with it this time?"

Meanwhile, very far away, Naruto sat on a branch of a very tall tree that overlooked the village. The dust from the launched paintballs still covered the mountain, so the fruits of his labor was still yet to be seen. That being said, Naruto still basked in the glow of his handiwork. The handiwork, of course, not being the graffiti he had wrought.

"You think the Old Man caught on to the fact you really were just there to see him?" Kyuubi asked while manifesting to sit on the tree next to his host. Naruto shook his head, before leaning against the trunk of the tree.

"Time hasn't reset, has it?"

"How do you feel? Are you content with the time you've had with him? Once the exams start you won't get another chance."

"I'm fine, Kurama. The Old Man had been dead for far too long already. I can handle him going again. He had lived and died in peace, and with a resounding smile on his face as I've been told. I have no regrets." The site then fell into silence as the two watched as the smoke settled.

"Besides, I don't think I could come up with another prank as grand as this. Disguising my visit as a distraction was the only way I could talk to him."

"Indeed," the Kyuubi chuckled.

The evening sun shone its orange rays over the village. In the setting sun one could just clearly make out the myriad of colors that decorated the Four Hokages' faces. Saturated with chakra, the paint shone in different colors depending on where you looked at it, overall lending to a dazzling, if not disrespectful, scenery.

Out of all of this though, one thing could be made immediately discernable. Of all the Fire Shadows, only the Third's face was left unmarred.

Naruto smiled. "I'll miss you Gramps. Thank you for everything."

XxX

Sasuke smirked when he saw the hysteria Naruto wrought upon the town with his newest prank. The Uchiha would never say it out loud, but he missed the kind of heavy handed sophistication that Naruto's pranks held. His son and heir, precocious brat as he was, was also a talent when it came to the art of mischief that his father pioneered. He however didn't, for all his talent, have his father's class when it came down to it though.

On cue, a zealous ninja attempted to get to work cleaning the mountain. The goop immediately responded to the chakra source and swallowed him whole. After a few seconds the poor man was spit back out, appropriately doused in multicolored paint.

Oh yes. He would praise the blonde for his ingenuity. They wouldn't be getting the monument clean until they finally caught the man. On a side note, Naruto's grades in stealth and reconnaissance was still unmatched even to this day in the future. It was truly a shame that the man preferred straight up combat.

"Sasuke-kun?" a voice rang out, and instantly Sasuke could feel a shiver run up his spine. Retreating into the shadows of the leaves of the tree whose branch he sat in, Sasuke held his breath as he waited for his pink haired teammate to pass. She did so without incident, and Sasuke was abruptly reminded of his mission for the day.

"Let's see if I can't put Naruto's record to shame," the Uchiha mused, before disappearing into thin air.

Sakura had a penchant for finding him. He didn't know how, but she would always know his general location. Now it was just a matter of how long it took her.

XxX

Sakura roamed the village, her green eyes scanning over everything she could set her sights on. Buildings, alleyways, even behind aisles of stores, Sakura looked everywhere for any sight of her raven haired teammate. In her gut she could feel that her love was somewhere in her general vicinity, but always he would disappear right as she was about to get a lock on him.

Simply put, it annoyed her to no end. Sasuke would always be just within her reach, but immediately, like the wind, he would vanish. The frustration she felt consumed her every thought, and as such the pinkette didn't notice the 3-foot-tall child.

Somehow only Sakura fell down from their collision. Rubbing her butt, she looked up to see a small child clad in a scarf that was several sizes too big for him. After a few seconds he was flanked by two other equally tiny children, one male and one female. The girl had outrageously styled hair that seemed to regard gravity as a suggestion more than a rule. The boy had the exact opposite problem. The way his nose was running seemed to suggest a particularly deep grudge with the planet-wide force.

"Konohamaru, are you okay?" the girl asked as she reached him. Her voice was high pitched and she was missing a tooth, but considering her age that was fine.

"Yeah, we heard someone crash!" the other child said. His snot hung from his nose like a pendulum, and Sakura had to wonder how he managed to talk around it.

Or why he didn't just wipe his nose.

"I'm fine Moegi, Udon!" the kid in the lead announced. "It'll take more than some girl to keep me down!"

Sakura was incensed by the boy's comment. She rose to hit him, and for a moment the boy seemed startled by her actions. Just as she was about to hit him, however, a hand grabbed her wrist. Turning with righteous fury, Sakura prepared to whack whoever stopped her as well, only for her anger to be immediately disarmed by a legendary smile.

"Cha doin', Sakura?" Naruto asked. His smile put the sun to shame.

"N-nothing, Naruto." Sakura responded. For some reason Naruto gave off this aura that told her dissidence was a fairly unhealthy course of action.

"Oh," Naruto responded, his smile not faltering in the least. "Cause it'd be troublesome if you hit the Hokage's grandson, especially so close to the Chuunin Exams!"

Sakura's face paled. "He's…" She then turned to the boy she was about to assault, whose impetuous face was completed by tiny folded arms. "You're the Sandaime's grandson?"

"Well… yeah!" Konohamaru responded. "Yeah, I am! And more importantly…" Konohamaru pointed to the blonde ninja who had saved him. "What's it to you, Brother Naruto? I thought you knew how I felt about being treated specially?" Konohomaru's tone sounded almost hurt. Naruto chuckled at it.

"Well, I can't help but treat you specially, because after all, you are special to me." Naruto then made his way over to the child and ruffled his hair. "But not for being the Hokage's grandson."

Konohamaru's eyes lit up. "Really? Then why?"

"Well, that's obvious, isn't it?" Naruto asked. Konohamaru shook his head vehemently. His eyes were sparkling as he looked up to his idol.

"No! It isn't! Tell me, Brother Naruto!"

"Well, if you really want to know…"

"Yes, we want to know Brother Naruto!" Moegi piped up.

"Yes, tell us!" Udon assented. At some point he had pulled out a handkerchief to clean his glasses, but not his nose. His nose was left oddly untouched.

"Fine, but only because you three asked me. Are you ready?"

"Yes!" the three children chanted as one. Their excitement was hard to ignore.

"Well, the reason Konohamaru is so special…"

The three children leaned forward as one, wanting to be as close to Naruto as possible, as if the action would let them know sooner.

"Is…"

"Yes?" the three asked. They were near bursting with anticipation, and thus leaned forward even further. This brought a grin to Naruto's face.

"Because…"

"Yes?" the kids all but screeched.

"He lets me know where you guys are, so I can use you all as punching bags!" And just like that, Naruto had bopped all three children on the head. As one they fell to the ground, both from the hit and the shock of being duped, and even Sakura lost her balance a bit.

After a bit Sakura recovered. "Naruto!"

"Hmm?" Naruto asked, turning around. "Something wrong, Sakura?"

"What was that for?"

"Fun?" Naruto answered, bewildered at her confusion. "If they couldn't dodge that, it was their own fault. I was going really slow."

Sakura shook her head. She brought her hand up to her forehead to massage there. "You can't just hit civilians like that." Sakura then gestured to Konohamaru. "Especially the Hokage's grandson!"

"Hey!" said grandson shouted. He was indignant, and his posture reflected that. "I'll have you know that I'm a ninja-in-training too! One day, I'm going to be the Hokage, believe it!"

Sakura winced at another person repeating Naruto's catchphrase. She turned to her blonde friend. "You've been teaching him."

"Is it that obvious?" Naruto asked.

Sakura looked back at the trio of kids. The other two who stood behind the Hokage's grandson had remained quiet, simply letting Konohamaru do the talking. It was clear who the leader of the group was, but despite this, the look in their eyes as they stared down Naruto was evident. They all but glowed with admiration for the young man, and even Konohamaru, albeit grudgingly, showed the same reverence.

"A little," Sakura replied. It was wholly obvious, but she decided to be tactful.

"Big Brother Naruto has been teaching us lots!" the girl known as Moegi chimed. Her smile was wide and innocent. So innocent, in fact, that Sakura wondered whether she had that naiveté when she was the girl's age.

"Yeah," Udon said around sniffles. "Though he mostly just hits us."

"Mostly just hits you, eh?" Naruto asked, one golden eyebrow raising in challenge. "Should I train you some more? How about right now?"

"N-no, that's not necessary Big Bro!" Konohamaru said, his voice in a whisper. Slowly he backed away from the older boy. "We're still recovering from our last beatdown!" Konohamaru then caught himself. "I mean, training! We're still recovering from our last training session!"

"Oh, no! I couldn't possibly deprive such young, willing minds from the wonders of my instruction!"

Sakura could hear the malice in Naruto's voice. So palpable was it that Sakura couldn't help but feel pity for the brats she felt hostility towards not three minutes ago.

"So kiddies, are you ready?" Naruto asked. He stalked towards them with an unbecoming smile on his face. The three children were visibly shaking now, and it wasn't long before their base instincts took over and they chose preservation. As one, the trio took off, kicking up a dust cloud behind them as they escaped. Cackling, the blonde Genin chased them, though at a more sedated pace.

Sakura stared at them from behind. Standing still, Sakura attempted to make sense of what she just witnessed. It was a relatively simple concept, but she refused to wrap her head around it.

"I don't want to go check on them," Sakura stated. "I don't have to go check on them."

Her Sasuke senses tingled. It was in the general direction of where her compatriots just ran.

"I feel like I don't have a choice in the matter of whether I go check on them."

No, she didn't.

XxX

Naruto was only a little surprised when he came across his student being held in the air by a familiar, if not younger, hand. Konohamaru was suspended above the ground by the collar. Smirking at the child he had in his grip, Kankuro of the Sands was downright pleased.

"Leave him alone," Temari of the Sands, Kankuro's sister, stated from behind him. Her blonde hair was done up in two wild ponytails that looked rather silly now that Naruto thought about it.

"You all looked silly back then. Every single one of you. Especially Rock Lee," Kurama chimed.

"Lee hasn't changed," Naruto thought back.

"And neither have most of you."

"I will!" Kankuro responded to his sister. The look on his face implied that he would do no such thing. "But not before I teach him a little lesson first!"

Kankuro then turned his attention back to Konohamaru. The boy whimpered, and Kankuro felt a perverse pleasure in his fear. Raising a fist, the man attempted to hit the boy, when something small and hard hit the back of his hand. Wincing at the pain, the Sand ninja turned his head to where he presumed the projectile came, only for another to hit him on the nose.

"Ouch! What the fu-" another projectile hit him, this time on the teeth. Aptly silenced now, all Kankuro could do was groan when another object hit his other hand. The pain made him release his captive, who quickly ran to hide behind Naruto.

"Brother Naruto," Konohamaru whimpered. Naruto placed a hand on the boy's head.

"Its fine, Konohamaru. The scary clown won't hurt you anymore."

"Wh-who are you calling a clown?" Kankuro muttered around the pain. "If I were you, I'd keep my mouth shut before, gah!" Kankuro screamed. The projectiles returned, this time hitting him in the eyes. "Who the hell keeps throwing those?"

"You're early, Sasuke." Naruto's attention was turned upwards toward a tree that was slightly behind the Sand siblings. In its branches sat the lone Uchiha, a smile on his face as he juggled rocks in his right hand.

"I didn't have a choice whether or not I was here. I might as well have fun." Stating this, Sasuke tossed another rock at Kankuro. It hit him in the back of his head, and a follow up one to his knee made him collapse. "I thought he'd start to dodge these. Is it just me or is everyone moving impossibly slow?"

"No, it's not," Naruto responded. "Don't forget that you're used to fighting people who move at near light speed. These are just children."

Temari looked the blonde boy up and down. He was short, and looked even younger than herself.

"Who are you to call other people children?" the blonde Sand ninja asked. Naruto quirked an eye at her.

"Who are you to let your brother keep getting hit by rocks?" As he asked her, another rock hit Kankuro, this time on the cheek. The boy was cursing profusely.

"I'm his sister."

"Yes?"

"I like seeing him get hurt."

"Is that so? Should I also take the same approach?" A voice —low, monotone and dead— somehow filled the area. Obscene amounts of killing intent bathed the area, and everyone, including Sakura who had just arrived, were forced to their knees.

Everyone except Naruto and Sakura, of course. They had barely registered the threat.

Temari felt as if she had been paralyzed. Her entire body went stiff as her spine went ramrod straight. "Gaara. I didn't know you were around here."

"No one ever does," Gaara mumbled. He was using chakra to stand upside down on the branch Sasuke was sitting on.

"Okay, we were just looking up there at the Uchiha boy. I know he wasn't up there." Kyuubi barked.

"Maybe he really is that good." Naruto responded.

"Bullshit! Did you see him?"

"I had a general feeling of where he was."

"I can sense Shukaku! There's no way he could have been hiding from me!"

"Maybe you weren't trying?"

"Bite me."

"Later," Naruto responded, before turning his attention outward. Sasuke was just staring bewildered at the boy beneath him, his facial expression showing that he too was surprised by the boy's entrance.

"Okay, I know you weren't there a couple seconds ago."

Gaara looked up at the raven haired boy who had addressed him. He looked slightly less disinterested when he did so.

"You have… the same eyes as me."

"Not this again," Sasuke growled. He threw another rock at Kankuro. Interestingly enough, neither Sand sibling moved to defend the boy, even though Sasuke knew full well that Gaara could have. "If you want someone with the same eyes, look at that ball of sunshine over there."

Sasuke pointed to Naruto, whose eyes literally shone upon being indicated. Gaara tried to look at him, he really did, but gave up the endeavor shortly after beginning.

"He is nothing like me," Gaara mumbled.

"Trust me," Sasuke responded. "He is more like you than you could ever possibly imagine."

"I think I have empathized with literally everyone I have ever met. It has been… Interesting." Naruto stated.

"Whatever," Gaara said. He then disappeared in a burst of sand, shortly reappearing on the ground in front of his siblings. Temari stiffened even more upon his arrival, and outright froze when he turned to them.

"Come, we are leaving. Stay behind and I will kill you." Gaara said such words with the air of someone talking about the weather. Brushing past his sister as if she were no more than a hindrance, the One Tailed Jinchuuriki set a slow pace away from the site. Temari rushed to keep up, but turned a sympathetic eye to her other brother, who was still on the ground.

"Kankuro, come on!" Temari urged. Her voice was in a slight whisper.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Maybe I'd be in a better position to follow if someone didn't keep throwing rocks at me."

"I thought you'd start dodging by now," Sasuke stated from the tree. He threw another rock, this one hitting the boy in the back.

"Damn it! Stop that!"

"Why? It's fun."

"Temari!" Kankuro shouted.

"Yes?"

"Help!?"

"Oh, right." Temari then pulled her fan over her shoulder. Opening it to its first moon, the Sand sister attempted to shield her brother with it. Little did she know that Sasuke was a master of rock throwing. The next rock the Uchiha threw arced in an impossible crescent around the fan and hit the boy in his other eye.

"TEMARI," Kankuro screamed.

"What?"

"IT ISN'T WORKING."

"I can see that!" Temari shouted back. She then turned back to the boy in the tree. "Don't you have anything else better to do? What you're doing can literally end up killing us."

Sasuke shrugged. "Less competition in the exams."

Around here the killing intent, which had vanished with Gaara's departure, had returned with the redhead's arrival.

"Didn't I say to keep up?" the redhead mumbled. Sand started to pour out of the kid's gourd, which was on the boy's back. Kankuro, who was appropriately annoyed at the whole situation, had decided to stop caring whether or not he died.

"Can you not see the situation I'm in?"

"He is just throwing rocks at you. Dodge."

"Easy for you to say. You don't have to dodge!"

"I have never needed to," Gaara responded.

"Then don't get on me for not being able to dodge all these rocks he's throwing! He's throwing them really fast!"

Another rock hit Kankuro, this time in his neck.

"Where are you getting all of these rocks?" Kankuro cried.

"You know," Sasuke started. "I really don't know. I didn't count the rocks as I picked them up, but I know I didn't pick up this many."

"Oh joy." Kankuro stated. His voice dripped in sarcasm. He turned to his brother, pleading with his eyes. "Can you help me please Gaara? You're my brother!"

"And?" Gaara tilted his head.

"I know you don't understand relationships, so I'll spell it out for you. Family helps each other out, so help me."

Gaara turned his head to Temari. "But this one said that one should like it when their brother was in pain."

Temari felt a bit of pride through the soul crushing fear she had for her sociopathic little brother.

"That's because she's insane."

"So am I," Gaara responded. Kankuro rolled his eyes.

"You're not insane, you're misguided. Please help me?" Another rock hit Kankuro. It was in his ankle this time. As he was trying once again to stand up, this was an especially annoying place to hit.

Gaara quirked a, for some reason, black eyebrow. "I am… misguided?"

"Yes, very."

"Mother says I am not."

"Our mother died, Gaara. That you think she's talking to you is exactly what makes you misguided."

"Mother says I should kill you."

"Did you not hear what I just said?"

"I'm signing off from this conversation," Naruto said. In a whirl of leaves both he and Konohamaru vanished.

"Me too," Sasuke said. In a shimmer of light, he too vanished.

"Wait, what?" Sakura asked. She had been forgotten by the side during the conversation. "Since when have you two known how to teleport?" Realization then dawned on her. "And wait… that was Sasuke!"

The pink haired girl then turned to go chase after where she thought the two had disappeared to, only to be grabbed by the scruff of her neck by a hand of sand.

"Worry not, small child. I will not kill you if you answer my questions. Do you think I am misguided for thinking my dead mother is talking to me?"

Sakura stared at Gaara and his words. Unsure of what to say to the psychopath, she let out a short whimper.

"Why me?" she asked herself. Somewhere in the back of her head she realized this was the second time she was stuck in a conversation with a psychopathic murderer.