Agk, guys I am soooo sorry for this mess, this site is being the devil to me right now! I pray all the kinks have been worked out of this now, here's hoping...
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Love is a demon, and you're the one he's coming for
Oh, my Lord...
He is the very breath you feel inside your lungs at night
He is the bitter wind who's drying up your appetite
He is the darkness that seeps into your fading light, Oh my Lord...
Oh my Lord...
---
"Yeah... this is one of the first places Sonic and I spent time together." Amy swirled one finger around in the crystal cool water of Never Lake, lost in a memory. Shadow watched absently, observing as the ripples spread and faded in a pattern to her movements, grabbing starlight as they expanded outward. He finally spoke up, breaking his gaze and his train of thought.
"You know Amy, perhaps you are correct about what you theorized before. Perhaps there have and always will be meant to happen pairings before they occur. Though I do not know…" Shadow stared into the open faced canvas of midnight blue and stars before him, the open sky that used to be his permanent home. He even knew exactly which cluster of stars the space colony would be aimlessly, uselessly existing in right now…
"What is it you don't know, Shadow? I thought ultimate life forms knew everything." The pink hedgehog that sat next to him at the waters edge leaned in to capture his gaze, smiling wistfully.
He couldn't help but grin at her.
"Almost everything. But I do not believe… it seems…" he was struggling internally, though his face was blank, emotionless as he stared upwards again. "Perhaps the fact that I was created ensures that I will always be alone. Perhaps it is my destiny, as an immortal. An equal was never created in partnership to accompany me. All biological beings seem to have already been assigned a destination to another. I do not believe I fit into the 'grand scheme of things', as mortals say-"
"That's a horrible thing to think!" Amy reeled, her voice climbing octaves as she grabbed the brooding hedgehogs arm. "Shadow, don't believe such a silly thing! You're here, you exist, so you were meant to! If you weren't, you would not have made it through everything you have. You survived the space colony, you survived the battle against Final Hazard… if anything I'd say you were a good luck charm!" She mused, and he raised a reluctant brow at that.
"Me?" He muttered, heavy with doubt.
"Shadow, you were meant to protect people. You are supposed to be here, or something would have happened long before now to change that. Stop being such a downer on yourself!" As he began to contemplate this heavily, marvelling on the thought, her next comment made him actually guffaw.
"I can read tarot cards- want me to see if I can find out your future in romance?" She wiggled her fingers theatrically, and he shook his head in amusement.
"That is fine, Amy. There are many things I have yearned to know in the past, but I would rather leave that as a mystery."
"Why is that? Aren't you curious?" Her eyes absolutely sparkled with intrigue now, scooting closer.
"I am. Would you believe that I do enjoy a surprise on the occasion?" He rumbled, and she pursed her lips a little, awed.
"Oh! Well… I suppose even ultimate creatures like surprises."
"Maybe more than anyone else. Few things surprise me."
"I guess I can understand that." She consented, bending her knees toward herself and hugging them close to her chest. "So what are you doing tomorrow, besides being my wake up call?" His eyes flickered downward to his inhibitor rings, absent, before clenching one of his open hands into a soft fist. It was difficult to read him, but he was displaying a very slight touch of bashfulness. The only person in the universe who might have ever known that was long gone.
"I have someplace I would like to visit. There is somebody I owe my gratitude for attempting to leash my inclinations to be foolhardy tonight. It never worked, but you cannot blame one for making an attempt."
"Was it a girl, Shadow?" Amy's voice was muted, but her eyes swarmed with curious excitement. Shadow nodded only once, but it was enough to set Amy off squealing. "OAH a girl, was she pretty?! You only met her tonight?!" Amy egged, and Shadow put his head in one hand, watching her in entertainment.
"Yes. She was beautiful. …So are you." The pair exchanged a bittersweet glance, and Amy took Shadow's free strong hand into both of hers.
"Well I'm sure you already know you're gorgeous." She gushed giddily, giggling. Shadow seemed taken off guard by the compliment before he grinned down at her coyly.
"It does not hurt to be aware of that. But… I am not going to make you complete on looks alone."
"I guess not…" She sighed sadly then, giving his mighty fingers a squeeze. She paused for a while, the silence strange on her lips. Then her brow furrowed, and she heaved out a heated sigh. "Oah, he's an arrogant, stuck up blue brat." She snapped, and Shadow nodded as if it were common knowledge. The smile that remained on his face looked so foreign on someone with his features- especially him. "But…well, I guess he is supposed to be mine." The warmth in her eyes as she took in the water was endearingly tender. "I know it sounds cliché, but I think I've always loved him- even with the way he gets on. I just always had this feeling that I'm supposed to stay with him. Like it's where I'm supposed to be."
"You must be. I do not know of another woman who would find his behaviour endearing."
"I want you to find somebody like that, Shadow." Amy said suddenly, and as she looked at Shadow's face, it slowly began to morph from placid to uncomfortable, then to disgusted.
"what?…like Sonic?" He cringed, nose wrinkling. This caused Amy to bark out a shout of laughter across the water, hearty and booming.
"Oh my God, Shadow!" She howled. "What are you even- NO-wah!" The both of them collapsed into a fit, struggling to recompose themselves in the complete and endless dead of night. "Hoo!" She breathed as it passed, placing a hand over her chest. "No, I meant…I want you to find somebody like that, Shadow. I want you to find somebody who completes you." He looked upon her fondly for a moment, before redirecting his eyes to the stretching palm of water once more.
"That would be extremely difficult. But I have seen the impossible happen… therefore it is improbable, yet not impossible." Shadow's crimson gaze took in the pretty girl beside him, as she stretched, then leaned against him with a yawn. That was his cue to stand, taking her with him as he went. "You're exhausted. Let me give you a ride, it's the least I can offer for the chaos I've brought you tonight…"
"You… did not… cause…" she paused to yawn again, before cradling her head in against Shadow's shoulder. "You smell good." She mumbled nearly incoherent, and Shadow's laughter was low and rumbling in his chest.
"C'mon, Amy…" He looked down at her still face, which was swiftly falling into a serene slumber. He gently thumbed her intrusive bangs away from dangling before her face. It was then that he allowed himself a minute, just a moment in time to feel a portion of sadness- a loss for what could have been, but was never meant to be.
They were not the two halves that would complete each other, and in a way he did regret that.
Still, his venture was far from over- but he would never question that hers was written in stone, definite. Regardless of how probable or improbable Shadow thought the two would be in terms of compatibility, that was irrelevant.
There was only one clear cut fact he gathered from this about love.
You didn't choose it. It chose you.
Take reverent care of this girl, Sonic…
---
"Had enough water or should I get you another?" Tails offered, and I shook my head dumbly from where I was curled on Tail's couch.
"M'good, dude." I insisted, pulling the blanket he'd given me tighter around myself.
"Yeah… you seem a lot more sober since you got here." Tails seated himself near my feet, two tails swishing against my knees.
"I totally am. I can't believe I was drunk like two hours ago-"
"You are so still drunk-"
"Am not!" I retorted, getting to my feet- and when I teetered, Tails grin jeering, I huffed in defeat and plopped back down. "Maybe a little bit." I frowned, wriggling under the blanket and curling up again.
"Mind telling me what the hell is going on then, while you're here?" Tails said flat out, collecting my empty glass and bringing it to the kitchen. "Some of us aren't allowed to go clubbing yet." There was a wry edge to that, and Tails bore a taunting expression when he came back and threw himself down on the couch again. I eyed the room nervously, unsure if I was even stable enough to review the shameful night.
"How was your night with Cream?" I jumped to, both curious and relieved to get out from under the heat lamp. He flushed at that, clasping his hands and looking at the white tips of his sneakers. He was so much like the kid Tails I always knew in that moment.
"It was, well, perfect." He sputtered, the pink on his cheeks growing into a crimson. "Like it always is…" He was silent then as I smiled, touched. It was just so damn cute that the two of them should ever become an item. It was as if it were supposed to happen, like… like me, and…
"Ahem!!" Tails cleared his throat noisily, glowering at me now. "You're not going to deter me that easily, Sonic. Now fess up. Why did I have to hunt you down? What went on in there?"
"Well, Tails- Amy left with Shadow." I said hoarsely, and no matter how many times I'd practised saying that exact thing to Tails on the way to his house, it still came out dejected and broken. I used to be so good at this…
"She left with him? Meaning…" His face blanked, then seemed to be stripped of color. "She's not sleeping with him, is she?! Is she drunk?!"
"Beats me. And yes." I said flatly, monotone. His words had sucker punched me, and I was still struggling to collect myself after it. Tails looked on me with soft eyes then, taking a gentle grasp on my ankle.
"Naw, it can't be like that. Sonic… Amy has more sense than that. Come on, now…"
"They were making out at the club." The bitter words shot from my mouth like a bullet, and without looking at him, I knew this surprised Tails immensely. It took him a moment to retaliate.
"Making out? Really?" He said weakly, brushing his bangs out of his face. I nodded dumbly, and when I noticed him staring at me wearily, I let out a heated huff.
"Fine, ok whatever, it was one kiss. One is enough." I said darkly, flipping over to avoid Tails sympathetic gaze. He tugged at my ankle again, unwilling to let me succumb to misery.
"Sonic, you know what happens when people drink. You can't be mad at her-"
"I'm not mad!" The tone in which I said that might have sounded otherwise. "I'm just…ugh." I groaned into the couch pillow, still refusing to look at my little brother.
"Are you disappointed Sonic?" He asked, sounding so much like his 8 year old self. "Did it hurt your feelings?"
"I-YES it hurt my feelings, Tails! Yes!" I said in exasperation, closing my eyes tightly against the wave of embarrassment admitting that caused. "I thought me and Amy- forget it. I was wrong, anyway. She's with Shadow now and it's my own fault." I grumbled, and the emptiness my own words left was almost akin to starvation. It felt so final, permanent. The silence spread out like the darkness outside, and Tails removed his hand. He got up, and I wondered absently- and sadly- if he was giving up and going to bed. In a way, I wanted him to argue with me- to tell me it wasn't true. Someone had to.
"Aw, Sonic…" I heard his voice meshed in half amusement, half pity. Then I heard him kneeling in front of me, and he took me by the back quills to tug me into a secure, brotherly hug. "You're such a dufus when it comes to girls you know that?"
"I know that…" I said dull & thickly, forcing back the tears I felt coming on. "Man, I am-"
"There's something goin' on. This is pretty messed up, Sonic. But I'm telling you now, there's no way Amy's just stopped feeling for you, ok? That's…" He shook his head then.
"I'm sorry but that's crazy talk. Something is up. Things are frigged…" He looked at me warningly when I tore back, glaring- now that I'd accepted she had officially cast off her feelings for me, I didn't want to set myself up for another let down. "Sonic, things are really screwed up right now, but there's no way that's true. I mean just days ago-"
"What? What Tails? What now? There's no place to go from here man! It's over! She's with him! She's-"
"Just days ago she called me up and it wasn't just to talk to me, she wanted to speak with you!" He dominated my ranting as he stood against me, his face as firm as his beliefs.
"For what. Over what? Last time I checked that turned into a date!" Again, words I'd hoped I could keep a hold of came stumbling out of my mouth. He seemed a tiny bit stung by that, and he circled the couch to stand behind it as he recovered. But he recomposed himself, and rounded on me for the second phase of our rally.
"It was just for fun. She called me, thinking you were here. She was upset! What was I supposed to say? 'No sorry I don't feel up to going out, I'm busy Amy so you can just carry on crying at home by yourself seeing'-"
"She was crying?" My face twisted from annoyed to sombre as I glanced over the couch at him. He paused, noting I was becoming more pliant. He took in a breath, nodding before continuing on.
"She's like my sister Sonic, I have to make sure she's ok too! And she wasn't, she was all shaken up because…" I had started peeking over the couch at him again, and his ears started drooping.
"Because?" I prompted, the atmosphere shaky. Tails was eager to reclaim balance, and stuttered swiftly into his next statement.
"B-because she was upset she hadn't heard from you in a while! She figured I'd know why."
"She had time to notice?" I grumbled, and Tails eyes seemed to soften up at this insecurity.
"Sonic… you have to stop thinking like that, or nothing is going to change! You know she wouldn't just forget about you like that." He snapped his fingers, and I shook my head stubbornly.
"Look I told you how she got on with Shadow-"
"Shadow isn't you! Why can't you- Sonic, this… this has really gone on long enough." The statement was so solid, it sounded as if my grandfather had just uttered the very words. So final. My eyes widened at the hard look on my young friend's face, so out of character for someone his age. Damn, when did he grow up, and where was I? It seemed like only earlier that day he was still 8. Where did this saucy 16 year old fox come from? "You know exactly what's happening and you're not dealing with it! It's stupid! Sonic, this is just like… this is just like if Eggman decided to come in here and take over our city. You wouldn't just sit there, would you? The solution is obvious!"
"Tails, I know you're trying to be Ghandi here but this isn't exactly the same-"
"WOULD YOU? No! I've watched you sitting around like a lump of fail for the past couple weeks, what are you? Who are you and what did you do with Sonic the Hedgehog? Snap out of it!" I gulped at that punch to the ego, raising my head in defiance at Tails and his out of character bossiness.
"Bro, you're just not getting' what this is about!"
"I know what this is about, it's you who doesn't know! You and that stupid ego- I'm tired of sitting around and watching it bully you, just do what it is you want for God's sakes! You've put this off for years, you put it off that night when I asked you, and now that you're a mess- lo and behold, you're STILL making up excuses! Would you just go to her house already-"
"I can't DO that!!" I snarled, thumping on the back of the couch. "You're the one who can 't see what's goin' on here when I see it for what it is! She's seein' other people- you think that's a sign to go tell her whatever it is she used to want to hear?! She's past this, don't you see I'm a freakin' boyband to her?! I CAME AND WENT! I was a fad, poster boy! The end! Kaboom, dream over! She went from leaping on me to leaping into my rival's-"
"For someone who runs at mach 1 you can be so slow sometimes you know that?!" He thundered, stomping his foot at me like he used to when he was fed up- like a child. "You should know her better than that by now! It's you who needs to figure out what's going on, fast. It's takin' you out, Sonic- if you don't do something soon, nothing is ever going to change! She actually will move on, then what will you do? Stay alone for the rest of your life? She's waiting for you to do what she's always waited on you to do! STEP UP! And you're just gonna choke?! You're being stupid, WHY? It's not you, Sonic! I don't like to see you like this..." He ended his rant with a sharp intake of breath, eyes beginning to well. "I barely recognise you when you're messed up like this. It's not you at all."
We were silent for a while as he bashfully swatted away the small collection at his eyes. Both of us were staring at the other incredulously, and then he abruptly turned from my line of vision. I perked up to respond or at least comfort him, but he put his hand up. "Don't. Don't even. I know what you're going to ask, and I won't let you. Don't ask me what you're supposed to do now, just do it. Do yourself a favor for once, Sonic. You've done enough for everyone else." I think if the back of the couch wasn't there, my jaw would've hit the floor. "And another thing..." He ever so slightly turned his head to me then, all smug and knowledgeable. "I know what you did with my radio. It's hard to ignore the imprint of a pointed toe sneaker in the ass of it. It's old, I don't really mind... but try not to make a habit of bunting my items through my top floor window, it could be something valuable next time."
Oh, God. Was this international dupe and humiliate Sonic week?
"I-I'll do that." Was all I could offer meekly, wishing to disappear, or at least bring the couch with me to hide behind as I made my way out. But when I stood, I was half shy half relieved that my younger brother came around to embrace me.
"Sonic... I'm not angry with you. I'm just gettin' scared for you, man. Do you know how weird it is seeing you of all people sulking? And I took a page out of Eggman's books. It seems the only way to get through to you is to shut you up & bitch-slap you with words." At that, the both of us exploded into a long, boisterous round of hilarity. When we finally adapted the will to breathe again, I sighed long and loud, staring out the window. He gave me a moment, then his voice picked up softer than before. "Don't worry about Shadow. I know Amy better than him. And I think she's just as messed up as you are. You've gotta fix this thing, or at least try to. You're not gonna back out this time... are ya?" He pressed nervously, and at that, I turned to him with my traditional simper stamped over my features.
"You kiddin' me pal? Since when does Sonic the Hedgehog back out of anything? You're right. I've been nothin' but a wimp these past couple weeks. I dare you to find something to scare me outta this one."
"Cute couples get in free?" He jabbed, rubbing in my one true fear of romantic situations. My smile expanded to an almost challenging beam.
"Nope. Not even that any more, little bro. It's almost light out, and I've got a disaster to fix. I gotta act before this shit gets out of hand." At this, Tail's cyan eyes sparked with excitement. He kept pace as he followed after me, toddling down the stairs in step.
"Y-you better call me and let me know how it goes Sonic! You owe me after this one!"
"I OWE YOU!?" I bark laughed as I now lounged in his open doorway, making him take a step back in surprised confusion. "Kid, I could convict you for treason. If anything, you owe me, Ice Cream man."
I left in a blaze of speed and laughter, Tail's flaming red face and call of 'point taken!' fading into the growing darkness. At least he saw me as he should, all speed and sauciness.
He would never know how I was splintered like thin ice right now, waiting for the moment to break apart in frailty- plunging into the icy hell below.
I shuddered, and smoothed the spot where my fur stood up at that mental picture.
I was making a bee line, charging toward the one place I would inevitably end up at during the break down of all this.
Visions of Shadow and Amy were pulverising me.
My doubts had never been so fierce.
My longing to see her open her door had never been so desperate.
I needed her, and against my natural instinct to nervously flee from the situation… now, like I did with all my enemies and road blocks, I was ploughing forward at the speed of sound.
She was the first and only person to make me feel- feel so much, and I prayed… please, please, PLEASE God, if you are listening to me out there, for all the good I've done, I'm begging you.
Just this one request.
Please let her be the last to make me feel this way- please, let her be the one.
I won't ever be the same if she turns me away.
I won't ever recover if Shadow could possibly be the one to complete her- if she could replace me so easily with him. I couldn't even fathom her preferring him- that idea singed me to blistering point. It hurt too much to dwell on, I couldn't delve into that portion of hell.
Now, not even my ego side could survive the strangle hold of the situation- the new me was running overtime, and Amy was that adhesive that would force the two into one again.
There was going to be no turning back this time. No running away, no distractions, just a destination that left my two halves quivering in both anticipation and anxiety. (That's my way of dulling down my complete and utter terror of what was to come.)
Yes, it was time for me to face the music.
It was time to pay a visit to the house of Amy Rose.
---
Been running so fast, right from the starting line
No more connections- I don't need any more advice
One hand's just reaching out, and one's just hanging on
It seems my weaknesses just keep going strong…
Head over heels, where should I go?
I can't stop myself I'm out of control
Head over heels, no time to think
Looks like the whole world's out of synch…
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SO-NIC! SO-NIC! SO-NIC! (waving blue banners like a psychopathic sports fan)
OK! SO I'm terribly excited to write the next part. I won't keep you all waiting too long, so hang tight and I'll catch you all at Amy's place in the next chapter. ;3
Also I am so happy that this actually came out decent, I spent over 2 hours just trying to decipher the mess this came out looking like. LOL
Till then Sonic fans! x3
-Mish
Song lyrics in this chapter:
The Clicks - Oh Yeah
Jann Arden - Could I Be Your Girl?
Go Go's - Head Over Heels
