narutohaloevovled - Emergency services are already en route.

Leon89 - Thank you, and yes... it was Temari.

CelticReaper - Bipolar much? I'm glad that you're enjoying the story so far. Sorry about the ocular discharge of vital fluids. Glad that you're loving the fic.

WINDXNINJA - I'm glad you enjoyed Kyuubis' part(s) I had a lot of laughs doing that.

badkidoh - Thank you... is this whenever enough for you?

Anonymous - Glad you love this story. *blushes* I don't know about the funniest, but I do try. Yeah, that's a common problem with fanfics out there, is that either the ideas are unimaginative, done to death, or impoosible to read. I'm glad that you like my work, and consider it well done. As for Kyuubi, I figured a centuries old demon with access to Naruto's mind and jutsus would have some fun, no matter the cost to his/her host's psyche... might be visiting them again... As for Temari, yeah she was a fun one to throw in. Naruto is male currently, he turns female when a leaf lands on his head, and reverts to male about an hour after its removal. Long reviews are fine with me, I have a lot of fun reading and responding to them. As for the 38 reviews, I'm glad that they're coming at all... makes me feel all warm and tingly inside. Here's the update as requested.

spottedstar2 - Cool, I spotted a star! Oh wait... that's not right... anywho, the weasel's only hunting Naruto for Temari, not for itself... so no hot weasel loving. Here's what's happening.

Elemetnal Dragon Swordman - Umm... sorry EDS? Dragon, please take care of him for me... I'd hate to lose a reader like that... And he probably will lose the weasel... I dunno...

PaulRap Raptor - Thank you, glad others think so too ^.^

AA TTrue GGamer - Thank you, here is more... not sure what moar is though...

SuzyQ - . . . *blushes and gets a Jiraiya grin with a slight nasel discharge of blood* Uhh... umm... hehe... the problem with that is he'd probably end up with death by snuu snuu if he was caught... oh but what a way to go...


Icha Icha: Animal Magnetism

Chapter 7: Fanning the shades

Naruto whimpered as he heard the familiar sounds of something being summoned, he knew Temari had weasels, and that they were fast. He wasn't exactly slow, not with how he was zipping through the trees on all fours, but something felt off, like he had some extra weight or something. Looking back a moment eased his suspicions, until he saw the little fox kit biting onto his tail and holding on for dear life.

Turning back around, he nearly fell flat on his tail when something heavy and orange slammed into his face. Peeling the toad off his face with one hand, he set Gamakichi on his head and kept running along.

"Hey Boss!" Gamakichi shouted, hanging on for dear life. "Tsunade said to get to the hospital! She has a safe room for you there!"

Naruto didn't waste any breath responding, instead turning in his tracks towards town, not caring that he'd left his clothing and underwear in the distance. When he heard Gamakichi let go and poof away, he let out a mental sigh of relief before realizing that the trees had disappeared, along with the ground. Looking down he let out a scream of panic as gravity took its effect on him.

In a moment of sheer panic, he summoned forth an army of shadow clones, forming a ladder of himself to the ground. Using them to slow his fall, he managed to land just inside of Konoha, on the opposite side of town from the Hospital. Fortunately though, it was a straight run, and he should be able to make it without a problem.

This plan was met with some difficulty when he found that he couldn't move his feet. Looking down, he saw his shadow was darker than it should be, and extended off to his side. Following the linked shadow, he saw Shikamaru standing there with a lustful smirk on his face.

"Hey Shika..." Naruto started with a nervous smile as he fought against the hold on him. "I don't suppose you could just let me go... could you?"

Shika's answer came when he stepped forward, causing Naruto to do the same. "I don't think so Naruto... see I have taken a liking to you. And as troublesome as this method is... you seem too much of a flight risk without it..."

Naruto took this as his hint to start fighting the shadow control, at first he didn't want to hurt his friend, but now... Now he just wanted to get to the hospital as fast as his feet could take him. His struggle caused Shikamaru to stop his approach towards Naruto and focus on his hold. Sweat beaded the pineapple haired young man, when something happened that made Naruto want to curl up and cry.

Temari leaped down from her fan, right behind Naruto's trapped form. "Thanks for catching the brat, Lazy bones. I'll take him from here."

"I don't think so, troublesome as it is..." Shikamaru drawled out as he licked his lips, eying Naruto hungrily. "This one is all mine, but... I am willing to share... he has too much troublesome energy for me to handle alone..."

Naruto pulled against the shadow control, praying to any deity that might be listening as he overheard Temari chuckling lightly. "Hey guys... how about you let me go, and we'll all talk about this like rational people?"

Any response from the other two was cut off when the small fox kit sunk her teeth into Shikamaru's crotch, effectively breaking his concentration. While Shika screamed in pain, and Temari checked to see what was wrong, Naruto made good his escape. As he neared town, he took to the rooftops again, hoping that'd dissipate the pheromones enough to keep people from mob charging him. Considering his current state of undress he could only hope that no one looked up as he ran.

Modesty was left in the dust when he heard footfalls behind him. Casting only a curious look back he paled and sped up more, finding that the ANBU had caught his scent literally, and were chasing him. If it had been just one or two he wouldn't have had a problem, but the full seven squads behind him nearly made him lose control of his bowels all over the marketplace below.

Turning back towards where he was running towards, he smiled as he saw a window with bright orange paint marking it up ahead. That must have been the path Baa-chan had made safe for him to get into the safe room. Pouring on the speed, he prayed that he'd be able to get away from the ANBU after him and into the room.

He was just about into the window when a body flew up into his path, unfortunately causing both of them to go tumbling into it. As they slid down the tube into a sealed room, Naruto tried to call out an apology, only to have his mouth covered in soft and warm flesh.

After a jarring end to the fall, Naruto found himself in a plastic cube, with seals covering most of the walls. Diving for the blankets in the corner he looked back at the person he'd collided with, and felt the color leave his face. He wasn't sure if it was the dog leash and collar with his name on it in her left hand, the whip in her right, or the fact that she was barely in a leather corset, vinyl mini-skirt and fishnet stockings... but something about this woman scared him, and by the sounds of whimpering in his mind, Kyuubi too.

"H... Hey Hinata," Naruto started nervously after gulping against his dry throat, "Sorry about running into you... I totally didn't see you..."

TBC