narutohaloevolved: You'd like it if he just gave in, wouldn't you?
Alyondria: Aren't I letting him get away with it? Are you sure that I'm not letting it win?
BrownPaperBag51: But I have so much I wanna do with Naruto... I canna just let one person capture him like that.
Sasunaru101: Now why would I tell you that?
Serenity Reigns: I suppose so... but ya know... It wouldn't be fun just telling people what happened.
CelticReaper: Got plans for Ino... life's going alright, just a small incident with glass yesterday, nothing major. Updated.
geetac: Thank you
AkioofWind: Thank you, and he's never been far away...
Trinity the Kitsune Kunoichi: Thanks, here's another heaping helping of more.
HikariNoTenshi-San: It's like a train wreck, you can't help but stare, no? Updated.
Kenta Raikiri: *ahem* Ara ara... seems that both of your are rooting for the libido's team... oh and about that bet...
helovestowrite: Thank you, something bad? Moi? *blinks* Oh, for shame... It'd be something horribly evil and mean, whiles still good...
WINDxNINJA: Sorry about your nerves, I hope you don't mind the stretching of the tension...
Volrath77: Heh... ara ara... so much lovely food, no? Where to start... where to start... shouldn't that be Captain Porno's voice?
Elemental Dragon Swordman: Hungry... or horny?
CaptDutchboy: I suppose the way to a man's heart is through his stomach... enjoy the continuing misadventures of Naruto in Icha Icha: Animal Magnetism!
The-Eight-Sin: By the blessed fecal matter of St. John! You'd have no chance with the dessert cart.
badkidoh: Tissues for nose bleeds and... other matters are to your left.
naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaruto-kun: Well now, I'm not entirely sure, I'm debating on which of several endings I want to do... we'll see I guess...
90MLLu: Thank you, glad ya liked it, here's some more of my attempt at keeping up the good work.
Icha Icha: Animal Magnetism
Chapter 30
"I hate you..." Naruto's libido growled out with a glare at the blond that was munching on a fire-roasted fish. "You are either a right bastard, or gayer than Sasuke... wait he was there, and you turned him down too... fucktard it is then."
Naruto grumbled as he ate the fish, glad his clone had performed kawarmi with him at the last moment, but the orgasmic taste of the ramen he was only getting the memory of right now was masochistic in the cruelest sense of the word. Furthermore, the other courses were heavenly as well.
"NOT just Sasuke mind you, but SAKURA too! Dude, we've been after her since the first year of the academy! AND SHE WAS RIGHT THERE!" Libido screamed in dismay while bringing up a stilled display of the scene, pointing right at Sakura who was inches from Naruto's left arm. "AND WHAT DO YOU DO?! YOU RUN AWAY! GODS ABOVE DUDE! YOU RAN THE FUCK AWAY!"
Naruto flicked off his libido grumpily while eating another fish, wincing as the memories of the main course started filtering. The noodles, the tender beef slices, the juicy broiled fish, and the delicious sausages. It was nearly too much to bear.
"Oh... don't you dare look at me in that tone of voice! You know we both wanted that meal, but you had to be noble and run away..." libido shouted while driving a finger at Naruto, "You've been nothing but a thorn in my side since I got here!"
As the memories of the silky smooth chocolate creams, the rich sweet vanilla cream, and the warm sweet caramel that melted in ones mouth filtered into his mind, Naruto decided he'd had enough of the annoying mental splinter. "I've been a thorn in... YOU'RE SIDE?! Look at us! You are in my mind, and have been nothing but a pain in my ass all day and night since you've appeared."
Standing over his libido with a snarl of anger, he drove a roaster skewer at the hallucination that was cowering before him. "Now you listen and listen well, I am not a pervert like Ero-sennin, if I am to give myself to someone like that, it will not be because of some stupid Jutsu! There is nothing you or anyone else can say to deter me now that I am so close to being free," Naruto ordered the shrinking figment of his exhausted imagination, "I will get out of this, and that is final."
Turning away from his libido, he snatched up his last fish and tore into it viciously. A moment later, he pulled off a handful of fish meat and knelt down, holding out the fish for a familiar faded blue fox nose. "Hello there Miso, how are you doing?"
Miso smiled as she walked out into the open carrying a radio headset in her mouth. After Naruto removed the headset, she smiled and wolfed down some fish gracefully. "Thank you Naruto-sama, I am well thank you. Your friend Shino asked me to give this to you... said you dropped it a while ago."
"Thank you Miso, I did..." Naruto answered quietly as he pet Miso, slipping the headset on. Pressing the activation button he spoke into the microphone, "Hey bug-man, you listening?"
"Indeed I am Naruto," Shino's voice answered back calmly, "I placed a couple of my bugs on the headset, and they are keeping me informed about your whereabouts and status. I will help you as much as I am able, but we, the Aburame clan, have been contained for trying to help you. We cannot hurt members of Konoha, so we are unable to escape, but I managed to secret away this headset pair. I will help you as best I am able. Please keep your toads from eating my bugs."
Naruto blinked before chuckling, "Was that a joke bug-man?"
"Indeed... you should keep moving," Shino stated calmly, "The Jinchuuriki have moved out again, I believe the two females said they would go first."
Naruto paled at the end of the warning, he knew that if those two were coming after him, he was as good as caught. After a moment he swallowed the lump in his throat and spoke up. "Shino man, if those two are after me, I don't know if I'll be able to make it..."
"If anyone can, it is you Naruto. You are the most unpredictable, number one knuckle-head ninja of the world. I believe it is time you remind them of why that is..." Shino reassured Naruto calmly, his tone sounding as though he was reading off a grocery list, but for some reason it filled Naruto with more hope than any impassioned speech could.
"Thanks Bug-man... I'll be in touch..." Naruto replied calmly before removing the headset and tucking it into his kunai pouch. "Alright you two... come out and play..."
"Oh dear Yua... it seems our little mouse isn't going to run after all..." Yugito purred as she slipped gracefully out of the trees to Naruto's right. At the same moment Yua appeared leaning against a tree off to Naruto's left.
"That it does, such a pity that he's in his male form... it is rather off putting to chase a guy..." Yua whined playfully as she held up a leaf. "Maybe I can change that..."
"No need for that Yua-san..." Naruto replied with a smirk on his lips, holding up a leaf of his own. "You have until I revert to normal to catch and hold me... or you will..."
With a burst of red chakra, so dark and oppressive, even the demons inside the other two Jinchuuriki were quivering in their prisons, Kyuubi burst forth from Naruto. "Or you will submit to my host's will after this jutsu ends!"
After the squeaks of 'yes sir' from the two Jinchuuriki before him, Naruto blinked as the chakra receded back into him. "Uhh... yeah, that sounds good..." Naruto offered with a chuckled before muttering to himself, "Where the hell did that come from?"
Naruto looked at the leaf in his hand for a moment before smiling wickedly. "Well then, shall we begin?" Naruto asked with a teasing smirk.
The two women looked at each other nervously, they had to decide if they wanted to pursue it, and with the now squishing feeling in their pants, and the containers of their demons. As they were deciding, Naruto placed the leaf on his head, and transformed into a female once again. The simpering voice that spoke up, caught their attention however, "Well girls? Shall we?"
The two girls looked at the orange-clad female for a moment, before glancing at each other again and turned to run the hell away from the blue balls influenced demon, and his now feminine container. Jutsu or no jutsu, they didn't want anything to do with that insane person.
Naruto watched the two running away with a playful smirk for a moment before leaning down to get ready to run after them. "The tables have turned; I think I should have some fun..." Naruto purred softly before springing into action. Somewhere deep inside, a dark voice chuckled evilly inside his seal.
Standing at the edge of the clearing, libido just stared after Naruto's retreating form with a stunned look on her face. After a minute, she stamped her feet and pouted petulantly. "And why couldn't she do that earlier?! It's NOT FAIR!" libido screamed to the air in frustration, seeming to pull her hair out. "Oh well, it's play time!"
"Uhh... Yugito-san..." Yua called out as she sprinted through the trees as fast as her legs could carry her, somehow managing to keep up with the taller female. "Isn't this something like the opposite of what we were supposed to do?"
Yugito thought for a moment, though she could have just been taking a deep breath to stabilize the quiver in her voice. Not that it helped much at all. "Y...yes... b...but I d...don't think w...we're welcomed..."
Yua blinked at the stuttering and nervous tone that Yugito's voice had taken, she knew that the aura had been terrifying, even her demon had been quelled by it. But she didn't understand what had affected her fellow Jinchuuriki so. It wasn't until Yugito skidded to a halt pointing straight ahead in silent horror that Yua understood, it was the sheer difference in power; any normal human would have probably crumpled up and died. However, they had something else to deal with.
Following Yugito's finger's direction she let out a whimper, seeing the sultry seductress that had appeared before them. For there, leaning against the tree before them was the female form of Naruto they'd been running away from. The pout she had on her face was nearly irresistible, especially with how she was playing with her tail. "Don't you want to play with me no more?"
"We were just uhh... ya know... we don't want to play right now..." Yua let out a whimper of nervousness. "We'll be your servants later... like the deal right?"
"You can't win or lose if you don't play..." Naruto playfully whimpered in return, teasing the girls even more. "So like all of you did with me before hand... I won't let you just not play."
Yua and Yugito looked at each other again, while the logic of the first part didn't quite scan correctly in their minds, the look in Naruto's eyes, and the tone of the second part told them exactly how much the blond woman meant it. So deciding to swallow their prides, and fears they did the only thing either of them could think of doing. They dropped to their knees and begged forgiveness.
Sadly this didn't seem to be overly effective, as the black aura of death swirled around Naruto once again, his eyes narrowing as Kyuubi took over again. "Look at you pathetic worms... where is your demonic pride! GET UP AND RUN YOU BRATS!"
A tiny little girl wearing a simple orange sun dress walked out, storming right up in front of the blackened Naruto and glared up at him, after a moment she spoke. "Knock it off daddy, play nice or I'll put you on a time out."
The effects of the ultimate demonic badass no jutsu completely and utterly ruined, Kyuubi sighed heavily and knelt down next to his daughter. "Kon-sweetie, daddy's a little busy right now... beside there're two things wrong with your statement, I'm already on a time out... and I don't do nice..."
"Oh... I know that daddy," Kon answered with a sugary tone to her voice, as she beamed up to her father. "But there is a good reason I stepped in when I did..."
Kyuubi groaned, knowing that he was going to regret this. "And what's that sweetheart?"
Kon smiled her best foxy grin, echoing ones worn by Naruto long ago, before turning slightly to her left and waving a hand towards where the girls had been groveling before Naruto and Kyuubi. "To give them time to run away from you."
". . . That's my daughter alright..." Kyuubi stated after a moment of stunned silence. A couple seconds later he broke down in laughter and settled on Naruto's backside. "Well then kit, remind this brat to buy you some ice cream after the jutsu wears off..."
"Yay!" Kon cheered as she clapped her hands, bouncing up to hug Naruto close. "THANK YOU DADDY!!!"
Kyuubi wrapped Naruto's arms around his daughter, savoring the feeling of holding her for the first time in over thirteen years. It was more of a blessing than he could ever have hoped for from Kami, more than he could have ever dreamed of earning with Karma. And he wanted nothing more than for this to never end.
Yua and Yugito were once again running for their lives through the trees again. They didn't care that they had to serve Naruto once this was done; he seemed like the decent sort, when his demon wasn't in control. It might even be fun. However, their run was stopped short when they ran into the other Jinchuuriki forming an assault crew, working with the still food covered Pornoteers, as they had insisted on being called, Captain Porno, and the remaining members of Akatsuki. When the others turned to look at the panicking pair, they all seemed to wait for their results.
Yua looked over the group slowly, counting every single one of them at least three times over before gulping, and looking at Yugito again. It was the blonde woman who spoke the words that were filtering through her fear clouded mind. "Not enough... not nearly enough... he can be thousands... and he's out to get us..."
Out of the entire assembly of ninjas gathered there, only one could think of the proper response to the situation. In the back of the Pornoteers section, holding his notebook and pen in trembling hands, Jiraiya looked to be the most ready to piss himself of the entire lot. "Oh... shit..."
