Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight. I'm just an uninvited guest swimming around in her pool.
Thank you, lovely reviewers. You are inspiration.
The Path We Chose
Chapter 3: Owning The Moon
On Friday night, homecoming night, Edward took me to a pub in Port Angeles that offered live music. I got to wear jeans, and a sweater and Vans, instead of a formal dress and heels--already better than homecoming. The Cliffs were playing tonight and since they were all under eighteen, the pub was letting minors in, but not without a bald guy sitting on a stool giving out huge red stamps on your hand that read: MINOR. I guess I should have been relieved that it didn't shout, LOSER.
We stood in the back of the dark, dank room, waiting at the bar for our Cokes while the band started. They were a loud mess of rock, and I kind of liked it even though my ears would surely be mad at me soon. The singer didn't really sing so much as growl his lyrics, and the patrons were more jumping than dancing. It was still safer for me to stand still where I was.
Edward, behind me, rested his arm on my hip, his thumb tickling my elbow. He seemed unaware of his own action. He leaned to my ear. "How do you think they got their name, The Cliffs?"
"Um, a last name?" I asked, because they all looked like they could be related with their black hair and dark skin.
"No."
"They like the cliffs at the beach?" I turned toward him and then instantly regretted moving because now his fingers were no longer touching my elbow.
"Close," he said. "Their name was once, Go Jump Off a Cliff. But it was too long for people to say, so it got involuntarily shortened to The Cliffs.
"Was I really supposed to guess that?"
He laughed and shook his head.
"How do I know you didn't just make that up so I would think you knew the band or something?"
"Bella, why would I brag about knowing this band?"
He had a point. But then, at the end of each…song…I guess you would call it, the singer shouted, "Go jump off a cliff!" I guessed maybe they really did want their original name to make a come back.
Our Cokes were slammed down on the bar behind us. We collected our glasses all drippy from their splash landing, and headed to a table, which really wasn't the best idea because the music only got louder up there. Luckily for my ears, The Cliffs took a break. The lead singer, or lead growler, approached our table, shirtless and muscular and sweaty. I couldn't help but look at his six-pack. I mean, he was no Edward, but he had that body and I was a seventeen-year-old girl with hormones, and eyes.
"Edward, thanks for coming out, man." He gave Edward that handshake that boys give each other to feel cool or tough. They knocked knuckles at the end.
"No problem, Jake. This is Bella, she's uh, she's, well, she's my wife."
Jake frowned at Edward and gave my hand a regular old shake. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Cullen, is it?"
"Bella Swan, actually."
"No way! Chief Swan's daughter? I know you. We know each other. I'm Jacob Black."
"Shut up! I haven't seen you in forever. I never would have recognized you." I stood up to hug his sweaty body. "We used to play together when we were kids," I told Edward. "Our dad's are old friends."
"Ah, on the inside with the police chief?" Edward leaned back in his chair. "Must be nice."
Jacob pulled up a chair from a nearby table--not bothering to ask the table's occupants if anyone was using it--and sat with us. "Hey, sorry about this place man, the acoustics in here are shit. You guys should come see us play at First Beach sometime in the wide open. That's where our music shines. How have you been Bella? Do you still fall all over the place?"
I looked down at my hands trying to fight my own blush. I reminded myself there was no need for embarrassment because Edward had already seen me in all my stumbling glory. They were both laughing. "I can't believe that's the one thing you remember about me!"
"Are you kidding? That was you." He turned to Edward. "I remember this one time: we were playing on the roof of her dad's cruiser. How old were we? Ten? Eleven?"
"I think seven," I said.
"Nah, we were at least ten. She fell off the roof of the car, man, landed on her arm. I though it was broken, right? But she kept saying it was fine. She didn't want her dad to find out." He was laughing now--had Edward's full attention. "She went through the rest of the day with her arm just hanging there all limp. Finally, she told her dad. Finally. And it was broken, wasn't it, Bella?"
"You broke your arm?" Edward asked, his laughter halting.
"Yeah, Jake, thanks for reminding me of my idiocy. I really appreciate that."
"Aw, come on, you wouldn't be you if it weren't for things like that." He was still laughing--laughing harder now.
"I am more than just a klutz."
"I know, I know. Look, I gotta get back, now. It was awesome seeing you guys. I'll call you sometime, Bella. We'll catch up." Jacob leaped back up on stage. He was wearing pants cut off at the knee revealing his flexing calf muscles, and I could have sworn his toes pointed behind him, all graceful in his leap.
"Seems I know the band, too." I said. "Not proud of that, either."
"How does he know we're not here on a date?" Edward asked.
"What do you mean?"
"He just said he would call you when you could very likely be my date. I'm wondering if I should be offended."
"Probably because you told him I was your wife. Or, he doesn't care. It doesn't matter anyway. Don't you know that when 'call you sometime' is followed by 'we'll catch up' it never happens? People don't have any follow through. My mom taught me that."
Then all communication was cut because The Cliffs started up again and unless we wanted to scream at each other or say "what?" fifty times in a row, it was better to just sit and listen.
My ears were ringing by the time we raced to the car in a failed effort to outrun the rain. We both had soaked hair by the time we slammed our doors shut. A few miles down the road, my inner-old-lady reared her wrinkled presence worrying that my hearing would never be the same again. "Say something. Talk to me so I know my ears still work."
He looked over at me and mouthed something.
"Stop that," I said. "You keep your eyes on the road."
He laughed and I turned on the radio because that was just easier at this point. Rage Against the Machine was on. I heard them just fine. They seemed mellow.
"You kissed me in class the other day," Edward said walking me up the dark pathway to my door. Yeah, like he needed to remind me. I tried to think up a quick excuse that didn't sound too excuse-y. I came up with nothing so I just looked at him. Maybe that would work. He looked different with his hair all flat on his head from the rain.
"I was surprised," he said. Okay, he wasn't going to drop this no matter how much I looked at him. "I liked it."
Somehow I found my voice and the words, they came right out. "You were surprised you liked it?"
"No," he said with a laugh, and a shake of his head. "You surprised me with the kiss. I knew I would like it; I just never thought you would do it." Did that mean he thought about it? Kissing me? He'd thought about kissing me.
And then I knew he was going to kiss me because he said, "It's my turn to kiss you." His eyes were on mine and if I thought they were intense before, I didn't know anything. I wanted to look away, his stare was that intense, but I couldn't, so I stared right back at him. This close, his eyes weren't all green, there was what looked almost golden-yellow just around his pupil. Closer he came and all I could think was: I hope I can do this, I hope he likes it, I hope I'm good at it. My eyes closed automatically and his lips met mine, and even though I knew it was coming, the touch of our lips startled me. I pulled back, slightly, but his lips followed me, and his hand on the small of my back kept me still. Then it was his lips on mine and my lips on his. I felt a tingle flutter through my body from my lips to my fingertips. My tingling fingers needed to touch something so I held on to his arms. His upper arms, I felt them flex.
Suddenly our kissing lips turned into mouths kissing, and tongues mingling and tickling. Yes, his tongue tickled mine. And this tickle didn't make me laugh, it made me whimper on an exhale--I couldn't help it. Then his hand at my neck slid to my face, his palm rounding my cheek and he pulled me closer, kissing me deeper. The pull was so forceful that I took a step toward him and I was on my tiptoes now. My hands moved to his waist and held on to steady my footing. My hands, there at his waist, holding on, and I felt him inhale. He held me so close our chests were touching. I could actually feel our hearts beating out different rhythms against each other as we kissed. Suddenly the tickling and tingling and fluttering turned into something stronger. Something more demanding and almost uncontrollable. I pulled away then, because I still could and soon I wouldn't be able to. Our foreheads rested together as though we were holding one another up as we let our breathing calm. I never knew there was that much...feeling involved in a kiss. It was so much more than lips. It was whole bodies. It was toes.
"What now?" he asked, still out of breath, and that made me want to kiss him again.
I just opened my mouth to answer and let his breath enter me. "I don't know," I said, because how could I know? I had absolutely no idea what he was thinking. "You kissed me," I told him, and he nodded, moving my head along with his. Then I pulled my head back because this conversation was awkward enough. "I liked it," I said.
"So did I."
"You did?" I didn't think he was lying but I really just wanted to hear that again.
"Absolutely. We should do that again sometime."
"Okay," I said, or asked. It kind of came out like a question. I reached up and fixed his hair, brought my fingers up through the tips, making it stand up again. The moon was behind him, low in the sky, reminding me that the world was still out there. Because a moment ago it wasn't. A moment ago it was just us and we owned the world and that moon.
"Goodnight, Bella," he said then kissed me again. It was a quick kiss and I leaned up into him as he pulled away. I felt a little-girl-pout coming on so I bit my lip instead. Then I went inside and I forgot to say goodnight back because I really wasn't thinking clearly.
That night, I went right to bed. All I saw was Edward everywhere and I just wanted to go to sleep so I could dream about him. It was not at all hard for me to fall asleep because my bed was so comfortable. The only request I had for my dad after I moved in was a comfortable bed. Right after he had asked me if purple was okay, I told him color didn't matter, comfort did. I'd laid myself down on the mattress and new exactly what I needed. "I'm going to need a down mattress for the top of this one, plus a down comforter for under this purple quilt, here." He'd called me a princess. "Just don't put a pea under my mattress." Dear-Old-Dad had spent a good chunk of his next paycheck on my requests. So, yes, my bed was much like a cloud and nobody should lay down on it unless he or she is ready to go to sleep.
Edward invited me to his house on Sunday so we could work on getting him a fake job. Well, he didn't so much invite me as say, You're coming to my house on Sunday. I could have given him a hard time and pretended I had plans, but I didn't want to. I wanted to help my poor jobless hubby. We had a fixed budget, some money in our savings and we seriously had to narrow down our spending until he found a job. As a pretend wife, I was really quite the spender with my weekly manicures, my therapy, and what seemed to be a clothing obsession. I didn't like my pretend self very much (no wonder I was in therapy).
I was relieved when my truck started up because it had been so long since I'd driven it I was almost sure I would have to call Edward to come and pick me up. I drove the old red and rust colored Chevy to the outskirts of town and up narrow hills on windy roads dense with fir trees. So many of them grew here, one after the other, almost on top of each other--arrows in the sky. Edward lived in a big house on a hill, deeper into the woods where the homes were all much further apart from each other. He had told me his mother inherited this house which really helped their current financial situation. He introduced me to the gorgeous Dr. and Mrs. Cullen. They were young, in their thirties, I was sure; which clarified why Dr. Cullen was still a resident at the hospital. They must have had Edward around our age. Dr. Cullen, though blond and amber-eyed, reminded me of Edward. They both had that same intense stare. It's the kind of stare that makes you feel like blushing or looking away. I really didn't want Edward's father to make me blush so I looked past him at Esme. Her hair was similar in color to Edward's and her eyes were green, too. Her smile was warm when she shook my hand gently with both of hers and held on for a little while. She pulled me with her into the living room, offering me milk and cookies. I thought milk and cookies was the perfect snack to procrastinate with.
"How do you like Forks?" she asked me as we both reached for a Chips Ahoy. Edward was sitting on the arm of the sofa. Carlisle had left for the hospital, he'd been on his way out as I arrived. In front of us was a huge, uncovered window and I could see the trees, so immense, the tops disappeared into clouds. From here, it looked more like the trees were being spit out of the sky rather than growing up from roots in the earth.
"It's small," I said, "And cold, and wet." That's when I remembered she had asked my opinion of Forks, not for a description of the town she had lived in her whole life. "It's growing on me," I said, glancing at Edward. It was automatic. I couldn't stop it. He was smiling so I did, too. "Your home is beautiful," I said, because that was the polite thing to say upon entering someone's home for the first time. My mom had taught me that much about manners. Then I looked around and believed it. The house was big and open and light. If I leaned back on the sofa, I could see into the kitchen. The furniture was modest. There was a wood piano against one blue-gray wall. All the walls I could see were some shade of nice, muted blue and the ceilings were painted light gray, matching the sky over Forks. I complimented her walls which did seem like a strange thing to say, but I liked them. She told me that she and her two men had painted last year.
"Do you play the piano?" I asked Esme.
"Edward used to play."
I looked at Edward. "You used to play?"
'Um, we couldn't afford the lessons anymore," he said. Esme looked at her hands. She was holding a cookie. She put it back on the plate.
"He learned a lot in a short while," she said. "You should play for her Edward."
He went over to the piano and started playing "Chopsticks". And then he laughed. "Some other time."
Up in Edward's room, after he closed his door, we decided that kissing was more imperative than school work. We were sitting at his desk, (me on top of his lap) where our books and notes were strewn about. Our intentions were in the right place but our hormones had other ideas. We had simply entered his room, traveled straight to the desk, tossed our Health notes and texts on top, then looked at each other. That was when we knew we had to kiss. If I wore lipstick, his whole face would have been splattered in color. I was sure my own face was turning red from his scratchy, whiskering beard. It felt good and so masculine at first, but when it kept rubbing against the same places it started to hurt a little.
"Edward?"
"Yes, Bella."
"Do you want to keep kissing me?"
"Unquestionably."
"Then please go shave your face."
I don't know if men are ever really eager to shave, but Edward, just then, I would call eager. He practically threw me off his lap and sprinted into the bathroom. "Heat up, heat up," I heard him tell the water.
I took this chance to look around his room. It was a corner room with windows on two of the walls. Unlike the rest of the house, his walls remained white, but just like the rest of the house his windows were nearly floor to ceiling big, and free of window-coverings. From where I stood with my back to his desk, his bed was in front of me, and to the right of it, three windows, side-by-side, covered the wall. I had to walk around the bed to see the base of those windows, they were so big. I imagined that when lying on his bed, facing the windows, he might get the feeling he was actually sleeping in the forest.
Next to his closet, his desk rested against a fourth window so if he ever needed a break from his studies, he only had to look up and out at this breathtaking view. From up here, it looked different. A fir tree, towering over the house, grew right outside his desk window. I put my head against the glass and looked down through the branches, so thick, I couldn't see the ground. The adjoining wall was window-free. It held a shelf, housing book after book all the way to the bathroom. As the wall continued on the other side of the bathroom door, so did another shelf, lined with CD's the entire way to the main entrance. I was drawn to the books, mostly hard covers. I picked up the Dickens book and opened it. It was old, the pages were nearly tissue-paper thin and lined with gold. It was a first edition. These books were not meant to be read, they were collector's items. I quickly tried to put it back on the shelf before he caught me fondling it.
"Come here," he said, stepping out of the bathroom.
"You collect first editions?"
"You noticed." He pulled me closer by my hand. "Yeah, my dad bought me one when I was about five. It was the Velveteen Rabbit. It's worth thousands now. Ever since then I sort of collect them."
"Have you read them all?"
"Of course," he said. "Some more than others."
Then he kissed me before I could ask another question, or even thank him for shaving. Edward kissing you--the best way of shutting a person up, ever. He smelled clean, the scent of his shaving cream. I reached up and caressed his smooth face and felt him smile.
We did actually get a little homework done before I left. We had to force ourselves. We couldn't touch or be near enough to accidentally touch, nor could we face or look at each other, but it worked. Edward opened his door to make it a little easier for us. I wondered what it would be like in Health class where we sat so close.
So, yeah, Jake made a cameo. This will probably, most likely, be his only scene so I had to let Bella at least ogle him. I mean, she does have eyes. She can't help that.
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