A/N:
I just want to thank everyone for following my little tale of despair. I do not want to ruin the tale but I will say that there is not need to worry about Sully and Brennan getting back together. I really appreciate all of your support it has helped keep my head in the game and my writing on key. And now as we commence onto the climax of our little tale I hope it moves you to read it as much as it did for me to write it. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Love,
Delia.
10
Booth watched as the door closed on his partner. He had never felt so small in his entire life. In fact he was certain that he could actually hear the moment her heart broke. He could not have felt more like shit. The feelings had hit him with brilliant force leaving his broken partnership in their wake. There was no need to wait for the natural order to take care of things; he had managed to fuck them up well enough on his own.
It was an enigma with no solution. He was screwed either way, he had her and he wanted more or he did not and he was incomplete. He needed her damn it. He needed all of her or part of her or whatever she could give him. If only he had thought a little more wisely before he spoke, if only his harshness was able to be better restrained. He needed her to see that he was wrong, that he loved her. Honesty was the only card he had left to play before he had to fold.
Sweets was still there looking at the shell of a man in front of him. For the moment he was not looking into experiments for his book. It was truly disconcerting to see his friends fight each other while they both raged against their own inner battles. He knew that Booth had not meant what he said in the literal sense but it was a brutal blow nonetheless.
" I don't know what to do." Booth said staring at him.
" Perhaps it is time to come clean, Booth." Sweets responded in a lighter more neutral tone, trying to ease the other man's discomfort.
" And say what exactly? I'm sorry I called our partnership a 'freak show' I'm just having a hard time dealing with the fact that I love you more than anything else in the world." His eyes were glassy as he spoke, tears threatened to over come him.
" This situation totally sucks, dude." Booth looked up at him, letting him know that he already understood that. " The only way to make this better is to admit your feelings to Dr. Brennan. I think the reason you can't do that is because you have not admitted them to yourself."
" I'm pretty sure admitting it to myself is what got me into this mess."
" Not exactly. You admitted it to yourself in a sense but you never dealt with it. You have to face it or you will lose her." Sweets said as he set his notebook down and stood. It was clear that the one thing Booth really needed was a little privacy to regain his composure. Besides there was nothing more that he could do for the man. Booth stood as well and made his way to the door. He paused at the frame and looked back at Sweets before taking his leave. Sweets had planted the seed, he only hoped it was deep enough for it to grow.
As Booth made his way down the hall to the elevators he thought about what had just happened. He needed some space, a concept he found himself having more and more frequently theses days. He was struggling with an internal demon wiping out all of his devices. The need to come to terms with his feelings once and for all kept shifting, turning into something far more powerful. It felt so empty inside there, destroyed by words he had not even meant. There had to be a way to right this wrong, to get her back to him where she belonged. Pulling out his cell phone he hit one on his speed dial and waited. The line rang once, then twice, then several more times.
" You have reached Dr. Temperance Brennan. I apologize but I am unable to come to the phone right now, if you will please leave me a detailed message along with valid contact information I well return your call in a timely manner. BEEP!"
Booth hung up. What he needed to say her voicemail could not convey appropriately. She would know that he had called regardless and hopefully after cooling off call him back. Booth leaned his head back against the elevator wall, there was a lot on his plate aside from the mess he had made of his personal life. He needed to get in touch with Sully, he needed to sift through the evidence and write out the reports. In the end the paperwork won out. At least in the confines of his own office he did not need to pretend that he was all right.
11
The sunlight had dipped down over the trees long ago. Fresh snow was falling along the ground as the last ruminants of light made their way around the J. Edgar Hoover building. Booth had not notice the transition from day to night, his face buried in the mounds of paper work that he was working on. He focused mainly on the photographs comparing the recent victim with the past. It was on his third or second run through that he noticed it. So slight that anyone; even his brilliant partner could have over looked it. The left tibia on the past victims had been removed surgically, leaving clean lines along the lower leg. The missing left tibia of the recent victim had been hacked out.
Either the killer was getting sloppy or the same person did not do the murders. It was very likely to be the latter. If in fact the same person where doing these they would have kept to their original methods. There was no need to change the game now, unless one was new to it. They were not looking for Carter's killer; they were looking for a new one.
He set the file down and rubbed his eyes. It had been almost four hours since his call to Brennan and she had not yet responded. He needed to tell her about his discovery and he also needed to apologize. He needed her to forgive him. It looked like a trip to the Jeffersonian was in his near future. Getting up and grabbing his pea coat on the way out the door he made his way to the parking garage.
The drive to the lab was silent. The voices in his head were enough noise for anyone to put up with. He would just march in there, tell her he was sorry, make her see the real reason behind everything and win her back. Then he would tell her about his discovery. Hopefully that would leave his adorably pregnant partner gleaming with pride at him. A fellow could dream at least.
It felt like it took a lifetime to get there. Once he did he threw the suburban in a parking space and rushed up to her sovereign territory. He fed his plan streams of confidence until he reached her office. The one with the closed door and lights turned out. Glancing down he checked the time. It was only seven-thirty; there was no way she had already left for the day. She kept even longer hours than usual trying to keep from getting to far behind when the baby came.
Spinning around her headed to the autopsy room. Perhaps she was examining the body with Camille. The working relationship between the two had seemed more strained than usual due to his antics; it was just another mistake he would have to repent for. Not only was he deflating his partnership, but he was causing issues for Cam as well.
" Have you seen Bones?" He asked her causing the medical examiner to jump in her chair.
" Though you two were out doing whatever it is you do." She said straightening the papers that she had scattered everywhere.
" We were, but there was a little misunderstanding. I just figured she had come back here."
" Not that I have seen, but I have had my nose in this book for the last six hours. Did you check her office or the platform?"
" Yeah, the place was dark and only Hodgins was on the platform." Booth pulled out his phone, no missed calls. He looked to Cam; she sat there poised to react. With out voicing their suspicions they both backtracked Booth's steps.
As soon as she flicked on the light in the anthropologist office they saw it. Booth felt his throat close and the air leave his chest. There, in the center of her desk right nest to the small plastic pig he had given her, was a long bone wrapped with a shiny gold ribbon.
" Oh God, Seeley." Cam swallowed hard making her way to the evidence, Booth right behind her. He leaned over her shoulder as she looked around the desk. Sheathing her hands in two latex gloves from the pocket of her lab coat she picked up the bone, turning it around. On the underside right next to the ribbon were several engraved words, 'Dr. Temperance Brennan 1976-2009'.
" No this can not be real, we were together not even four hours ago." Booth protested the evidence. There was no way that psycho had taken his partner.
" When did you see her last?" Cam's voice pulled him out of his head.
" I don't know, four hours ago. We were in a session with Sweets and we got into an argument. She left and, I assumed, took a cab back here." Booth said trying to recall the important details that seemed to be far too fuzzy now.
" Have you spoken to her since?"
" I called her right after I left the session but she did not answer. I figured that I would just give her time to cool off and then we would talk." Booth looked away trying to hide from Cam's detective eyes. She could tell that whatever going on went much deeper than that but there was no time to press for the specifics. If they wanted to find Brennan alive they had to act quickly.
" I will run a DNA test but I am certain that this is the tibia of the victim. I will also ask Hodgins if he can find any particulates on it, perhaps of we can find out where this has been we can find her."
" Camille, I said something today, I didn't mean to, it just came out. I was so frustrated and I slipped. I can't let… That can't be the last thing I ever say to her." Booth said stopping her in her tracks. She halted halfway to the door and turned to face him. His tormented face looked broken. This was not the man she had known and loved. This man was alone and scared. It was a pretty well known fact that Seeley Booth did not do scared.
" We will find her, I promise." The weighty bond was the only thing she could give him. There were no guarantees at the moment, but he did not need to know that. Ducking her head one last time, her lips tightened into a line she walked out of the office, evidence in hand.
Booth sank onto Brennan's couch with his face between his hands. For the second time today tears welled up in his eyes. This time he let them come. If they did not find her he would never forgive himself for this afternoon or otherwise. He needed her more than he needed to breathe. If earlier he had not been man enough to own up to his feelings he certainly was now. But it was far to little way to late. He would never have the chance to tell her that. He would never smell her hair or look into her eyes. His hand would never rest in the curve of her back as they walked. He would never get to fight with her. That was what he would miss the most, the verbal spars. She never stopped challenging him, pushing him to be a better man.
It was there in her office of pure reason that he pushed aside his logic and clasped his tear stained hands in prayer. He needed the good lord on his side in this one, needed the guidance. If only he could have one more shot. If there was a way to tell her that he was sorry. He would let her make the rules, let her call all of the shots. He would give up anything to have his family back. All he needed was time, just enough time. It only took being a few seconds ahead to rescue her. With the Lord on his side then, perhaps he could be just quick enough to save her life.
12
Jack Hodgins sat silently at his computer while it rendered. There were times when the computer was not fast enough to out run the bad guy. He took a long pull on his coffee cup and hoped this was not one of them. The bone Cam had given him was particulate gold, crawling with several very interesting creatures that he would have taken the time to explore normally. At the moment, he just needed one good clue as to where this thing had been. He sat here, three hours after Cam had filled him in, waiting for his computer to work. Everyone was around him on the platform staring at the piece of calcium like it held the answer to the second coming.
Angela sat next to Booth rubbing his shoulders in way that left Hodgins very curious. Booth was always so calm and collected. He kept things rolling and called the shots normally. Now though, the poor looked like a deflated raft in his pool house waiting on summer.
Cam was examining the Bone with a microscope looking for anything else that might have been overlooked. He was not sure there was much more bone she could go over though. They were running out of time, if they even had any left in the first place. Talk about a shot in the dark.
" These score marks must be where he carved this out of the victim." Cam said aloud, more to herself than to anyone in particular.
" Can you tell what type of weapon was used?" Angela asked still rubbing the catatonic Booth's shoulders.
" That would be Dr. Brennan's department." Cam said quietly. The very sound of her name brought up a moment of silence among the group. No one wanted to believe the worst and nor could they bring themselves to hope for the best. The smell of coffee and stale air seemed to be the preferred focus, clearing their mind of the terror they were quelling with.
The beep made them all jump.
Hodgins turned to his monitor. His brow furrowed, and he leaned in. The grainy substance on the bone was common tree sap. " Christmas Trees." He said allowed.
" What?" Angela said looking over at him.
" The grainy substance on the bone was boiled on tree sap from a Douglas Fir." He responded looking around at his friends.
" If we can find the right tree lot we may have a chance." Cam pointed out taking off her latex gloves.
"There is one a few blocks from here," Booth spoke for the first time in almost an hour. " Bones and I took Parker there to get a tree for my place."
"There must be a dozen tree lots in this area." Angela pointed out.
" We could spilt up?" Cam threw out there.
" No. It's too dangerous. We can't go in there without back up." Booth said.
" I wish there was something more we could use." Hodgins took another sip of coffee.
" We do not have time to sit here and guess about this. We go in and search the tree lot. How can you just sit her and argue about this when Bones does not have any time left!" He could feel his anger mounting. If they were just going to sit here and theorize then he would go without them, he had to at least try. It was the only way to keep her face from haunting him forever.
" Booth, we all want to find her, but a wild goose chase will just waste time." Angela said her voice light yet firm.
" She is there Angela, mark my words." Booth stood, pulling out his phone and calling for back up. This was all they had, and he had to seize it.
