Regina didn't know what to do. The eerie silence that has fallen over the house was driving her to think too much, to relive things in her head that she'd rather not have lived in the first place. This house shouldn't feel like the castle. This house was small; much smaller than the palace she was used to, but it still it felt the same.

Regina wanted to cry, but she didn't know why exactly and the brunette refused to cry for no reason, so she choked back frustrated tears. The young queen wanted to be strong, like her mother had always commanded. Regina closed her eyes and the image of a lonely cobweb blowing in the wind filled her head. Desperate to hold on but seemingly fragile and destined to snap and blow away like it had never been there to begin with.

Emma Swan asked her what she remembered last, about her life before. The answer to that question is this feeling. A state of lonely hopelessness was her strongest recollection. She suspects this was precisely what he wanted all along.

She shakes this from her head. She shouldn't dwell on things she can not change. All she can do is learn to use her magic and hope that one day she will be powerful enough to... That's always as far as she gets.

Not long after Emma Swan left the mansion, Regina was summoned to Rumple by way of lava in the skull. She detested this way of communication, it reminded her of her mother, as morbid as that sounds. Unfortunately, the efficiency couldn't be denied. Within moments of the excruciating pain Regina was at Rumpelstiltskin's side.

"Ah prompt as ever your highness." Rumple said not even looking up from his chest full of odd objects.

Regina looked around. They were once again in the back of Gold's shop. Regina disliked this place, it felt like being in the middle of a hoard of looted cherished possessions.

Regina grasped her hands together and held them in front of her, waiting like the ever obedient student.

It seemed that Rumple was finally finished doing whatever he was doing and he closed the trunk.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes" She nodded.

Rumple smiled. "Aren't you going to ask what you should be ready for?"

Regina sighed but tried to seem interested. "What should i be ready for?"

"That's a good girl." He turned and walked over to a wooden case filled with vials containing different colored liquids. He leaned over and picked out a blue one bringing it up to his face. "Tonight, we'll be testing out a new potion."

Regina didn't like the sound of that one bit. "What kind of potion?" She asked not able to mask the nervous shake in her voice.

"Don't worry, Dearie. You won't be taking the potion. I've got someone much more...disposable in mind?"

Dread filled Regina. For reasons unknown to her, the teen immediately thought of Emma Swan. Panic filled the young brunette, but she tried to maintain a face of indifference. She was proud of herself for keeping up a facade of disinterest as she looked down at a glass display case and asked. "Who?"

"Just some idiot who works in a flower shop." He waved off the subject and went back to the vials.

Regina tried to slow her heart and push this unwelcome anxiety to the back of her mind so she could examine it in the safety of Rumple's absence.

"Let's go" Gold said pushing the vial into his coat pocket and finding his cane.

The whole ordeal took about three hours and Regina was spent. Emotionally. She hated what they did to that man, but she learned long ago to be powerful is to be ruthless. Besides she didn't know him. This fact was helping her a bit, but not much.

Physically. Regina was taken by surprise when the man snapped one of the ropes and latched a large hand onto the girl's neck. He managed a pretty nasty hand print bruise before Rumple had him bound again. Regina went to immediately heal the bruise, she knew how to do that well, but Rumple stopped her with a harsh shove back.

"Leave it!" He snapped. "It will remind you why you should always be on your toes."

Regina frowned. It wasn't her fault the imp can't find sturdy rope. She bit her tongue and moved so that Rumple could shut the trunk. She knew that it wouldn't be worth it to rile him up. He was already enraged that his concoction had not worked. The man had no clue who he was now.

The brunette suspected she would be helping the little bastard for a good while longer.

"Go home" Rumple snarled walking to the driver's seat and climbing in.

Regina knew that Rumple meant for her to magically transport herself back to the mansion, but she didn't. The teen gently touched her bruising neck as she watched Rumple drive back towards town in his horseless carriage.

"Fuck you" Regina said after him. She smiled a bit at her swear. She didn't get to use that word near enough.

Regina wanted to walk back to the mansion. She knew she wasn't to be seen by the townspeople, but it was late. She started down the road in a steady pace taking in the fresh air. There was a cool breeze that felt delicious on Regina's bare legs as it blew through her dress and whipped her long brown curls up around her face.

When she made it into town she kept her head down and continued on her way to the mansion. Soon she heard footsteps approach.

"What are you doing out and about?" She recognized the voice and calmed slightly.

"Hello Jefferson"

"Your majesty" He bowed slightly but then almost tripped over himself to keep in step with the young queen. "Would you care for some company this evening."

"You want to keep me company? Why?"

"Because i enjoy your company, besides who the hell else do you have in the world?"

Regina wanted to shout at Jefferson, tell him she did have someone. This would be a lie though, and he knew it.

"Fine" Regina said already feeling guilty for going against Emma's wishes. But Emma had her family to keep her company tonight, and the thought of being in that house alone was enough to cause a lump to form in Regina's throat.

Regina took Jefferson's offered arm and walked alongside him as he rambled on and on about something. Regina was lost in her own head just nodding along. She was busy wondering if Emma Swan had told her family about Regina's regression. Regina wondered if her son, older Regina's son, ever thought about her. Did he ever miss her? She knew she missed him. How could she not?

When they arrived back at the mansion they took up on the couch in a sitting room that had a library like feel to it.

Jefferson poured them drinks and Regina brought her legs under her and got comfortable on the couch letting the alcohol that tasted of apples warm her from the inside out. She allowed Jefferson to put an arm around her.

They sat there in a comfortable silence for a while staring into the fire place both seemingly lost in their own heads.

"Jefferson?"

"Your majesty?"

"Regina" The teen corrected.

"Regina" He parroted.

"Why are you here with me. I'm sure i've done horrible things to everyone in this town, including you."

Jefferson seemed deep in thought then he took a large gulp.

"You remind me of when i was young, when we were young, and less... mad."

Regina hoped he wasn't lying. She liked this.

Just having someone next to her was exactly what she needed. The sound of Jefferson breathing in and out steadily was enough to keep her from those haunting thoughts. The sweet alcohol wasn't hurting either.

"What do you remember, Regina?"

Regina hated that question, but the alcohol gave her the strength to speak on it.

"I remember losing everything, and being a queen is not what it's cracked up to be."

"The king is not kind?" Jefferson asked already knowing the answer to that question.

"Jefferson, i don't want to talk about this." the teen pouted and finished off her second drink.

"Here let me" Jefferson raised from the couch and finished off his own glass then went about pouring them more.

"You're getting me drunk"

"I am" he said with a devilish smirk.

"And i thank you." She said with a gracious bow.

"Times are hard."

"Indeed"

"Jefferson you know Emma Swan, don't you?"

Jefferson handed Regina back her drink and answered bleakly "We spent some time together."

"So what's she like? What's she really like?" Regina took a large sip of what was quickly becoming her favorite drink.

"Well" He dramatically plopped down on the couch laying his head on Regina's lap. Normally Regina would have pushed him off, but she was rather tipsy and the human contact was comforting. "She's a bit like you."

Regina frowned in confusion but stayed quiet.

"She wears her heart on her sleeve, acts tougher than she is. She's also stronger than she thinks she is. She talks salty."

"Fuck you" Regina laughed thumping him on the head. "You're not making sense"

"I'm making perfect sense."

"Jefferson. If someone asked you what Regina Mills was like. What Regina Mills was really like. What would you say?"

Jefferson thought for a moment.

"You, or grown Regina?"

"Is there really a difference."

The mad hatter chuckled "You have no idea."

"Then me, i guess."

Jefferson lifted his head to take a long drink then let it fall back on Regina's lap. "I'll have to think about that."

Regina accepted this and let her own head fall to the back of the couch.

"What happened to me Jefferson?"

Jefferson turned on his side so he was facing Regina's stomach and he looked up at her through alcohol glazed eyes.

"Wait" The teen said sharply. "Don't answer that. I don't want to know." Regina took another drink, her eyes fixed on fire she had started with a flick of her wrist earlier. "Not yet"

"Then i won't say a word on it."

"Good"

"Why did you want to know about Emma Swan."

"She has my son, does she not."

"He's her son remember."

"How could i forget that little detail" Regina frowned.

"Regina what happened to your neck?"

"You're just now noticing that?" She asked running her fingers along her bruised throat.

"No, but i didn't think you'd tell me earlier."

"Your right." She took another drink. "and i'm not going to tell you now"

"Rumple?"

"Indirectly, yes."

"I can't wait to see what that devious little bastard is up to."

"It's not that interesting."

"I seriously doubt that. After living in this cursed town for twenty something years even the slightest bit of drama and mystery deserves to be headline news."

"What's headline?"

"It just mean big news"

Regina nodded. "This land is strange, but i like it's drinks."

"Is that all?"

"No, i like that box of napkins in the hallway, and i like my new clothes."

"I like your new clothes too." Jefferson patted the material of the dress that rested against Regina's stomach close to his face.

"Although it's all in such dark colors."

"The older you is older" Jefferson shrugged."When you were older in our land you wore such colors, and your necklines were... daring to say the least."

"Really?" Regina smiled at that. "I bet i looked just fabulous."

"Terrified and curiously aroused were those left in your wake."

Regina smiled big.

"You do look older Jefferson" She said raking her fingers through his hair seeing tiny bits of gray starting to peek out. Jefferson shut his eyes loving the impromptu scalp massage. He couldn't remember the last time someone touched him with half as much affection.

"The men in my family gray young."

"Ah. That must be it" Regina said rolling her eyes. She stopped stroking his head to take a large gulp of her drink. When she got settled back Jefferson took her hand and dropped it down on top of his head again. Regina smiled and went back to raking her fingers through his brown hair.

"Where do you live?" The teen asked.

"I live on the outskirts of this bustling metropolis."

"Is your house as nice as mine?" Pride evident in her voice.

"I do have a very nice house actually."

"Can i see it sometime?"

"Do you want to go there tonight?"

"Not really. I don't want to move."

He shoved his face into her stomach and murmured "Me either."

Regina shrieked at the feeling and shoved him back to his previous position using her grip on his hair as leverage.

"If i would have said yes, would you have moved."

"The queen get's what she wants."

"I'm not a queen here."

"You'll always be the queen. Ask anyone."

Regina considered this for a moment. "That's not a good thing is it?"

"It is what is is."Jefferson halted Regina's movements for a moment while he drained his glass and Regina did the same. He laid back again."In a moment i'll get us more."

"Hmm" Regina nodded.

They fell back into the comfortable silence. Regina stared into the fire again, running her nails across the grown man's scalp rendering him helpless as a bowl of jello. Jefferson stared at the material of Regina's dress.

"Do you want to sleep now?" He asked quietly.

"Yes, i do"

"Do you want me to leave?"

Regina was quiet a moment then answered in almost a whisper. "No."

"Then i'll stay."

"Just to sleep." Regina clarified.

"I'll just sleep next to you." Jefferson said as he raised up. He took the glass from Regina and sat it next to his own on the coffee table. The mad hatter took Regina's hand and helped her up.

The brunette snuffed out the fire with a wave of her hand and she walked through the house on drunk legs turning off the lights and locking the doors. She would stumble every now and then, bumping into things. Jefferson did his best to steady her as they made their way up the stairs and into Regina's room.

"Take off your jacket and those ugly shoes." Regina ordered as she walked into her closet.

Jefferson complied. "My shoes aren't ugly" He pouted.

"No, there not all that bad." The teen admitted from the walk in.

Jefferson shucked off his jacket and peeled off the dark red button up so he was wearing his slacks and a t shirt. Regina reemerged in a pair of yoga pants and a grey v neck.

"Very regal" Jefferson said wiggling his eyebrows.

"Shut up"

Regina switched off the light and crawled into bed.

"Stay on your side" She warned.

"I was hoping you'd rub my head."

Regina snorted loudly.

"You know what i mean" Jefferson bellowed.

"Fine." The girl sighed.

Jefferson scooted over and down so he was laying on Regina, his head on her stomach liking very much how her breathing moved his head up and down. Regina continued with the scalp message. Regina didn't know why she was doing this for him. Maybe subconsciously she wanted him to enjoy his time here enough for him to come back. This was pathetic and beneath her, but Regina was sad, drunk, and it was what it was.

"Next time you're massaging my feet." She warned.

She couldn't help but squirm under him as his laughs shook her body.

"Deal"