"If I come home to something on fire again-" James said sternly, trying to ignore the fact that his teenage child was rolling his eyes when he should have been listening to his very stern very important parental speech.

"Again?" Sirius asked behind him, arms crossed but an impressed smile on his face. Remus elbowed him in the side, trying to keep an eye on both his husband, and their two kids playing in James's living room.

"It's just a couple of hours dad. I'm just going to put on the TV for them until they fall asleep." Harry sighed, not understanding why everyone had to treat him like such a child.

"I'm serious, Harry."

"No you're not, he is." Harry pointed to his godfather, his smile bigger than his thirteen year old ego. Remus pushed Sirius's hand down as he went for a high five.

"They'll be fine James." Lily sauntered into the front hall of their home, putting some final bobby pins in her hair. "Order a pizza and watch some movies. We'll be back soon." She kissed Harry on the cheek, and dragged her worried husband out the door to the car. Remus and Sirius said their goodbyes and followed.

"They warn you teenagers will be difficult, but nobody told me they'd be this difficult." James mumbled as he got in the car. "The eye rolling, the puns, the sass."

Remus laughed from the back seat. "He's only difficult because he's you, James."

"So where are we going?" Sirius asked, "I want to know what kind of drunk I'm getting." With Harry finally old enough to babysit the younger kids, the gang had decided to go out for a couple drinks.

"I was thinking the Three Broomsticks?" Lily offered up. "You know, for old time's sake?"

"That dive bar we basically lived in at college?" Remus asked, leaning his head against Sirius's shoulder. "Oh my god, I'm reliving so many hangovers right now."

"Ooh why not?" Sirius chimed in. "I haven't seen Ros in forever. Wonder if she still works there."

"She's going to realize she served us underage once we whip out our IDs and they're not the fake ones she saw us use all through college." James suddenly realized, sitting up straighter in his seat.

Lily laughed. "Like they're even going to card you, you old man."

"I'm pretty sure Madam Rosmerta knew they were fake, James. I have a hard time believing she genuinely thought you were a 6'4" exchange student from Sweden." Remus said. "Your fake accent made you sound like a muppet."

"God, it's been years." Lily sighed, gripping the steering wheel tight. "I doubt she'll even remember us."

A few minutes later they were pulling into the parking lot and making their way inside. Behind the bar stood an old woman with a bandana tied up in her hair, polishing a glass and chatting loudly with a customer. She looked up at the chime of the bell when they walked in and her face lit up, brighter than the neon budweiser sign on the wall behind her.

"My boys!" In seconds she was out from behind the bar and rushing over to them. She pulled Lily into a hug first, asking her, "Are you keeping them in line?"

"Trying to." Lily responded with a smile, warmly returning the hug. Apparently she had remembered them.

Madam Rosmerta gasped when she caught sight of the wedding band around Remus's finger, the gasp turning to a smile when she saw the matching one on Sirius's. She held both of their hands. "If I was a betting woman, I would have made a lot of money off this."

Finally she turned to James, cupping his face in her hands. "My sweet Johan. And how is your family in Sweden?" Sirius howled with laughter as James's face reddened.

Still remembering their usual orders, Madam Rosmerta got them their drinks and set them up near the back, promising to come sit and catch up once the night had slowed down.

"God, it's been what...fifteen years since we've been in this place?" Sirius pondered, stirring his margarita with his straw. "Look at all these…" He grimaced, "young people."

In a college bar, it only made sense that they were surrounded by college kids. As they sat in a booth in the back football games were being argued over, parties were being pregamed with shots, and date proposals were being rejected. They watched as a sloppily drunk couple made out pressed up against the jukebox that hadn't worked since '97.

"God were we ever like that?" Remus grimaced.

"Oh sweetie." Lily said, her arm wrapped around James's shoulder. "You were worse."

"Oh don't act all high and mighty. I've walked in on you and James enough times to know you guys were right up there with us." Sirius said, wrapping his arm around his husband.

They talked about college for a while, reminiscing over old rooms, old friends, old jokes.

"Sometimes I don't even know how we made it out of college alive. There was a two month period where I didn't see you eat anything but Swedish Fish." Lily motioned to James

"I was just trying to connect my roots." He cracked a grin. "Really delve into Johan's character."

"If we're going to talk about bad habits, you only slept two nights a week, Lils. If that." Remus said.

"There was homework to be done and essays to be written. Parties to go to." Lily sighed. "It all seemed so important. And now I can't remember a single thing I learned."

"Best years of our lives." Sirius said, his fingers intertwined with Remus's. Remus squeezed his hand.

"Nah, I can think of a few years that were better." He said.

They continued swapping stories a bit longer.

"Remember that time Sirius tried to use Lily's body spray as laundry detergent?"

"I had run OUT ok? It smelled good, and it was perfect plan in theory. If I remember correctly, you confirmed my foolishness, James, and actually poured it in."

"Oh my god, I forgot about that!" Lily chuckled. "You were picking glitter out of your socks for months."

Madam Rosmerta came by with a second round of drinks "On the house," consoling Sirius by telling him she thought the glitter socks were actually quite an interesting accessory.

"Ah, the level I strive to reach with all my fashion choices," He said. "Interesting."

After the laughter had subsided over Sirius's questionable hygiene habits, Lily paused and looked up.

"Can you believe we've all known each other for over thirty years?" She asked. Remus did the math on his fingers, confirming that they had indeed known each other that long. "If someone had told me senior year of highschool that I'd be married with kids and still hanging out with you idiots, I wouldn't have believed them." She continued.

"I don't think I would have, either." Remus said. "We got into so much shit in high school. Feels like yesterday, doesn't it?"

"For some reason it feels like yesterday, but also like a million years ago at the same time." Sirius said.

"What did we even do in high school? I feel like all we did was drink vodka we stole from Alice's parents and watch movies." James said, taking a large sip of his drink.

"From what I remember, we played truth or dare like it was the only game that existed." Remus added.

"Oh my gosh yes." Lily said. "What is so appealing to high schoolers about making your friends kiss each other."

"I suppose it has to do with all the raging hormones." Sirius sipped his drink, just starting to feel the pre-drunk dizziness.

"Ooh you know what we should do?" James looked up from his beer, eyes bleary but blazing behind the drunken film. "We should play."

"What?" Remus asked, unimpressed.

"We should play." James repeated, even more enthusiastic this time. "One last round. For old time's sake."

"We're too old, James."

"Lily Evans Potter. We had a water balloon fight in our driveway yesterday, and you're pulling the age card to get out of a little game of truth or dare? Sounds like…" He looked up at her, grinning. "You're not up for the challenge."

"Oh!" She pushed him out of her face. "That is just childish. And not working."

James stuck out his tongue at her. "Look if you're too scared to play truth or dare that's fine. I guess we don't HAVE to play."

She glared at him her arms crossed. "I hate that you know me so well. Alright I'll play."

James grinned and looked at Sirius and Remus.

"You don't even have to ask, let's do this."

James was all riled up now. "Alright, ground rules. We're all married so you can't make anyone kiss anybody. You'll have to be more creative. And let's try not to get arrested, BUT, that doesn't mean everything illegal is off the table." The rules were met with nods all around.

So, with alcohol-fogged brains, and grins you could see from space, their last game of truth or dare began.

Because it was his idea, and they wanted to punish him immediately, James went first. "Dare." Predictable as ever.

The other three conferred for a while, finally landing on a dare they liked. Lily, their spokesperson, commanded "Go steal a sip from a strangers drink."

Even drunk this didn't sound like a good idea to James. "Unsanitary" He shuddered, but slid out of the booth anyways, as they had yet to find a challenge he wouldn't take. He found an older victim, in an effort to look less creepy, and walked over to the guy.

"Hey man, whatcha drinking?"

The other three couldn't hear the guy's response. James raised his eyebrows and said "Oh really? My whiskey smelled a little funny, pretty sure it was watered down." This comment earned a glare from Rosmerta behind the bar, who wasn't a fan of Swedes questioning her quality of business. He held his hand out palm up, and the guy unwittingly handed him his drink. People will hand you anything if you stick your hand out expectantly.

James sniffed it, then tilted it back, pouring half the drink into his mouth. The guy who he had stolen it from looked horrified. "What the FUCK, man?"

"Nope, doesn't taste watered down to me. Enjoy the rest." He turned on his heel, walking as fast as he could back to their booth, leaving the still horrified guy far behind him.

He slid back into the booth, shielding his face with his hand. "I hate you all."

"This was your idea love," Lil patted his back affectionately, amused but grateful her spouse hadn't just gotten decked.

Remus went next. "Dare." A little less predictable. Once again there were three conspirators, their whispers just barely reaching Remus's ears. Finally an agreement was made.

This time Sirius made the command. "Go get a girls number."

"What? I'm gay as fuck. And married." Remus took a sip of his drink. He probably should have listed married first.

"Ah there's no harm in it. And you can't refuse a dare. Sorry but thems the rules." Sirius kissed his husband on the cheek. "Go get her."

Remus wasn't drunk enough for flirting so he chugged the rest of his drink before reluctantly sliding out of their booth and making his way across the bar.

He walked over to a girl who looked to be late thirties sitting at the bar, drinking alone. Ugh, strangers. How does one start a conversation?

"So…." The woman looked up when Remus spoke, unsure if it was directed at her. "Alcohol, huh?" Remus motioned to the drink in her hand.

"Well," She looked around confused. "I don't know if you've noticed but this is a bar."

"Oh, I've noticed." Remus winked, ignoring the laughter of his friends behind him. The woman looked bewildered.

"Are you having a stroke?"

"Look, lady." Remus stumbled onto the barstool next to her. "My friends dared me to get your phone number. I can't go back until then, so…"

She looked behind him to the three idiots grinning in a booth. "Aren't you guys a little old for truth or dare."

"I'm sorry, is there an expiration date on fun?"

She sighed in defeat, just wanting to get this weird drunken man to leave so she could finish her drink. "Fine, I will give you my number on one condition. You have to promise never to use it."

"Sweetie. I'm married and gay. The digits please."

She handed him a napkin with her number on it, and he left her behind him, very confused and mildly amused.

He slid back into the booth, throwing the napkin into the middle of the table. "Hope you're happy."

Sirius picked up the napkin, examining it. "If your gay ass can get a girl's number, straight men really don't have any excuse." And then, just so nobody got any ideas as to who belonged to who, Sirius proceeded to shred the napkin, disposing of the shreds in his empty glass.

By group vote, Sirius went next.

"Truth." Thoroughly unpredictable this time. Sirius had picked truth a whole two times in his life.

Lily and James looked at each other drunkenly, both their eyes reading the other's faces. Lily turned back to face Sirius and blurted, "weirdest place you've ever had sex!"

"Really Lils, that's what you're going with?" Sirius said. "Ok, well…" He looked over at Remus. "October, Senior year of undergrad?"

Remus pondered for a minute. "I was thinking December, the year after we adopted Hope."

"Oh you know, I want to keep that one to ourselves...I just remembered...February Sophomore year?" Sirius wiggled his eyebrows.

Remus laughed. "Oh my god. If you want to tell them."

Lily was practically falling off her seat in anticipation. "Just spit it out for the love of god. Where is it?"

"Well...we're sitting like three feet away from it." He looked over to the bar that Madam Rosmerta was currently polishing, and held back a grin.

James gasped. "During business hours?"

"No you perv." Sirius laughed. "I used to work here. We'd use my key after hours all the time." He put a hand over the side of his mouth, shielding his next confession from Ros. "To be honest, back when I worked here, you'd be totally correct in assuming the whiskey was watered down."

Remus was still laughing fondly over the memory. "Remember how long it took us to get your ass print out of the mahogany?"

"Baking soda and water." Lily replied automatically, furrowing her eyebrows when Sirius and Remus turned to look at her surprised. "What, you think you're the only two to ever fuck on a bar counter?"

Lily, by default, was next.

"Dare." Her voice, amplified from the alcohol, tumbled hastily out of her mouth, her bleary eyes scanning the rest of the group, making it clear she wanted a challenge.

The three boys- sorry, men- conferred for a solid couple of minutes before landing on a contender. It was James who detailed her quest.

By the entrance of the bar was a wall covered in small plastic rectangles. The Fake ID wall of shame. James pointed at it. "Go steal us the dumbest fake ID."

Ah, a challenge worthy of her effort. Lily blew some stray hairs out of her face and slid out of the booth, taking wobbly steps towards the wall. She stood up there for a while, scanning, shifting her weight from one foot to the other before she settled on one. She threw a quick glance behind her making sure Madam Rosmerta was busy behind the bar. Then her hand shot up and snatched a single plastic ID from the wall and shoved it into her pocket.

As she walked triumphantly back to her booth Madam Rosmerta called out "That better not find its way into the hands of a minor!" as Lily passed the bar. Lily sheepishly nodded.

When she got to the booth she pulled the ID out of her pocket and slapped it down on the table. "The dumbest one. Some dumbass named Voldemort."

Remus snorted and picked up the ID, struggling to read it. The guy didn't even have a first name listed, just 'Voldemort' emblazoned on the plastic in the space left for names. The picture showed a white male in his late twenties and Remus could see why it had been used as a fake. The picture had been brightened beyond recognition, the harsh lights of the DMV washing out any recognizable facial features. "This guy doesn't even have a nose!" He cackled.

Sirius laughed beside him. "Let me see!" He snatched the ID out of Remus's hands, only laughing harder once he saw the picture. "I think he's bald too!"

Then the ID was flat on the table again, their dizzy heads pressed together as they cackled each time they found a new ridiculous flaw in the fake.

"He looks like a snake!"

"Ssssssssssss, I am Voldemort, King of the snakes!"

"SSssssiriusss sssssstop"

"Haha this can't be a real person. I refuse to believe this is a real person."

"He looks like a bad comic villain. Like some middle aged guy who can't defeat the 11 year old protagonist even though he's supposed to be the most powerful being in the world."

"Oh my gosh he does. Or like some creep who gets weird matching tattoos with all his weird friends."

Remus pulled back from the group, still laughing hard enough that his head hurt. "You guys have the most oddly specific imaginations."

Slowly the laughter died off, everyone leaning back in the booth nearly asleep.

"I can already feel the hangover I'm going to have tomorrow." Remus said, rubbing his temples as he rested his head on Sirius's shoulder, his husband's arm wrapped comfortably around his waist.

Lily sat across the table from him, her hands running through James's hair, who was only resting his eyes, god damn it, he was not asleep. "When did we get so old?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, I don't look a day over twenty five." Sirius said, jabbing Remus in the stomach playfully when he snorted in disagreement.

When James started snoring, Lily and Remus got up to settle the tabs. Madam Rosmerta gave them mints, and hugs, and warm goodbyes, also getting her ID back, so she could put her wall of shame in order again. Lily almost didn't give it to her, mumbling something about mementos and framing it.

The night ended with an uber, drunk hugs and promises to call the next morning when the hangovers had worn off.

At almost two in the morning, Sirius was wrapped in Remus's arms, safely in their bed, the children asleep and the lights off.

They whispered to each other in the dark, waiting for the alcohol to leave their blood, their brains slowly unfogging.

It was quiet outside, the stars the only witness to the silent streets below them.

All was well.

A/N: I had the time of my life writing this story, but this is the end of the little world I created for myself. Thanks to anyone who read it, I love you all.