Where Courage Ignites

14. Me Too

January 23rd, 2018

The house was nearly silent this morning, just the shuffles of feet atop squeaky floorboards and singing pipes to be heard. My mother didn't yell to wake me up and everyone was somberly quiet during breakfast. Even Isabella seemed reserved. It was as though we were in mourning, like someone was gone, but I suppose part of me was.

Mom took me to the hospital before school for an examination. We approached the nurse at the desk who asked, "What is the patient's name?"

"Gabriella Montez."

She clicked a few times on her computer before quietly asking me, "Would you prefer a female or a male doctor to see you?"

"Female."

"Alright, I have you entered. You can take a seat as you wait."

Mom tried to follow me in, but they stopped her. "We're sorry, this is a private examination."

I said to mom, "I'll be okay. Wait here."

The nurse led me into a room and pointed to the folded gown on the table. "Please put that on. The doctor will be in soon."

I took off my all my clothes and dressed in the gown like she instructed. I flipped through a brochure on properly administering the Heimlich maneuver until there was a knock on the door. A ginger-haired woman with beautiful green eyes entered the room and introduced herself. After she explained everything that she'd be doing, we began. She took photos of my bruising and once she checked underneath my gown, she told me that I had some tearing. After she had placed a small cotton ball and a bandage around the skin she pierced on my arm, she said, "We'll need to see you again in six weeks for another round of testing for additional gonorrhea, chlamydia, syphilis, and hepatitis testing and a pap smear for HPV."

"Why do we have to do it a second time?"

"Basically, the accuracy of disease detection increases the longer it's been in the body." She stood from her stool and said, "You may dress in your clothes again. You did very good today."

Mom kept to herself the whole drive to school, but once we rolled up to the front curb, she stopped me. "Gabriella," she began, looking down at her hands resting in her lap. I waited as she took her time preparing something to say. I was anxious to hear her thoughts, since these words seemed to require extra attention and consideration before voicing. When she began speaking, her voice was sincere and regretful, "To think back on the days that I screamed at you to get out, I'm ashamed of myself now. I'm going to do better for you. I am your protector, Gabriella, and I want you to know that. If anything happens, don't hesitate to call me."

"Thanks, mom," I said. "I know."

I popped my door open and stepped outside when I looked back and noticed a teary glisten to her eyes. I let the door close and watched as she brought her hand up to her quivering lips and pulled away. I remained in that spot, watching as her van joined the long line of other cars filing out of the parking lot.

I unstuck my feet from the sidewalk and began heading towards the doors. Standing in the grass on my right was Anthony's hoard of skaters, eyeing me down like a pack of wolves whose alpha ordered them to stand guard. I fought with the temptation to turn around in the face of their intimidation tactic, but I stood my ground and walked past them anyways.

When biology came, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that a substitute teacher was taking over the class. Less pleasant was the hour and a half long review of the chapter, like I hadn't already had enough of it the last few weeks. By the time lunch rolled around, I realized from my time in the hallway that the whole school had to have known. Strangers who I've never talked to were staring at me, and some were even pointing me out to their friends. So it was either that everyone knew what happened, or that I had become a paranoid narcissist over night. Instead of being exposed to more unsolicited stares in the courtyard, I opted to keep hidden in the library during lunch. I sat at a table against the wall and opened the novel I've been blankly staring at the last few weeks.

I glanced to the side when I noticed someone approaching my table and found Taylor wheeling her rolling back pack behind her. I abandoned my novel on the table and stood to greet her, throwing my arms around her.

I felt the warmth from her smile tickle my ear as she said, "I am so proud of you."

I responded, "I couldn't do it without you, Tay."

We dropped our arms from around each other and she spoke, "Did you hear about the Brannigans?"

I flinched at the name, "I don't want to know anything about them."

"Oh, it's not bad news. None of them are here today."

"Really?"

"Seriously. Did you tell the dean about Mr. Brannigan yelling at you and what Mrs. Brannigan did?"

"Not yet. I was focused on telling my parents yesterday."

"It seems like the news about Anthony was enough to scare them off. But when are you going to tell someone about what they did?"

I shrugged. "I don't know that I will. It's already tough enough getting people to listen to me about him, I don't want to deal with the backlash for attacking his parents, too. I need to be smart about how I pick my battles."

Taylor shot me an uncertain look, then just as quickly shook it off and asked, "How did telling your parents go?"

"Well, I wasn't in the room. I had Mr. Reynolds tell them in a private meeting. But we should have just announced it on the intercom seeing that everyone found out anyways."

"Word spreads around this school way too quickly."

"Yeah," I drawled out the word as I thought. "Actually, did you hear anything else?"

"What do you mean?"

"Did you hear about anyone else?"

"No."

"You didn't hear that another girl was assaulted?"

Taylor thought for a moment before shaking her head, "No."

I pinched my lips together in thought, "That's interesting."

Taylor leaned in towards me and asked quietly, "Are you saying that someone else was assaulted? By Anthony?"

"Yes, but I can't say who."

"Of course."

"It's just bothersome that my story got out there, but hers didn't. It's kind of…suspicious."

"Wait, do you think she's the one who leaked it?"

"I don't know. She might have thought I deserved it. She could be acting vengeful after I took something from her."

A look or realization slowly crossed over Taylor's features and she mouthed the name, Martha?

I nodded.

Taylor shook her head, "No. I know her. It couldn't have been her."

"You also thought she'd stay on the team after I joined, but you were wrong about that."

"Being bitter about a scholastic decathlon spot is not the same as a sexual assault case. There has to be another answer."

"What then?"

"Let's think about it. The Brannigans know it was you because you told Mrs. Brannigan to her face. We know that she told the rest of the Brannigans because Mr. Brannigan confronted you about it. Therefore, it's not a stretch to say that she told Anthony, too. Anthony probably told his friends and that's how it spread. Your case spread because Anthony found out about it from his mom, whereas the other girl might still be anonymous to them. Who are we going to believe would spread this information: the rapist himself, or another victim? What woman would be so low as to spread your story like that?"

I considered her ideas, and then asked, "Do you have her phone number? I want to talk to her."

Taylor recoiled, "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Please, Taylor. I need to hear it from her directly."

"What difference does it make? It's already out there."

"The way it got out there matters. If someone maliciously spread it, I'd want to know who."

"Gabri-"

"Please!" I snapped, "I don't expect you to understand, but just help me."

Taylor sighed, "Fine."

I added her number to my contacts and texted her:

This is Gabriella. I want to talk with you about what happened. Can you meet with me sometime today?

She immediately responded: No, that's what a therapist is for.

Do you hate me, Martha?

Martha: Lol, what?

Do you hate me? Is that why you told other people about what I said in the meeting?

Martha: What? I did NOT tell anyone about that. I don't know how it got out.

So why don't people know about yours?

Martha: I have no idea. Maybe it just wasn't as tragic? I don't know, but I didn't tell anyone about the meeting. I swear. I would NEVER do that to you, to anyone. And frankly, it's insulting that you could think that I did. I may not have liked you when you first came here, but that's just beyond mean.

I'm trying to believe you, but it's really hard to trust anyone right now. I hope you can understand why that might be.

Mrs. Phillips praised our bravery in coming forward, but personally, I'm not proud of myself. I don't feel brave. I feel hollow. This ordeal has taken everything out of me. I'm tired already. So, so tired.

January 24th, 2018

The moment my door shut and my mother pulled away, there was someone calling my name, "Gabriella!" I looked over and found Taylor jogging up to me, nearly out of breath.

"Taylor, what's going on?"

She quickly asked me, "Do you have social media?"

"No, why?"

"You have to see this." She tossed her phone to me and I looked at the posts on the screen.


Martha Cox

Status: Everyone at school is talking about the recent rape accusations made against a male student and the girl who reported it. I can't just sit by and quietly listen to people doubting her story anymore. I feel compelled, obligated to share my experience and involvement with her case. I was in the room with her and the dean when she filed her report because I had my own sexual assault to report. Anthony Brannigan grabbed my breasts in front of the school when I was passing through his group to the doors. It was humiliating, but he seemed sickeningly comfortable with touching me without my permission. So whenever you think about doubting her story, remember that he doesn't have just one accusation against him anymore. #MeToo

Likes: 298

Comments: 9

Shares: 3


Kelsi Nielson

Status: Hearing and reading about the recent accusations against Anthony Brannigan has caused so many repressed memories and emotions from years ago to resurface. When I was a freshman and he was a sophomore, Anthony took me out on a movie date. After it was over, I asked him to take me home since it was already late. He refused and took me out to campgrounds about twenty minutes out of the city. I was confused and concerned about my curfew, but just played along, not wanting to make a big deal out of nothing. When we arrived, he turned the car off and convinced me to go into the backseat, saying that we could see the stars better back there. So I got into the backseat and within the next few minutes I was struggling to keep my pants held up against his strong pulls on them. The rest of what happened is far too graphic to write, but I will be speaking with the police about the rape that then occurred. I would not have found the nerve to come forward with this story if it weren't for the girls who spoke up before me. Thank you for your courageous example and motivating me to finally tell my story. You aren't alone. #MeToo

Likes: 104

Comments: 4

Shares: 3


Tiara Gold

Status: I dated Anthony Brannigan for a few weeks my sophomore year at East High. During that time, he frequently pressured me into sex with him. He was very pushy and often wouldn't understand the simple "no". I ended my relationship with him because I questioned my consent during those weeks we were together. I wasn't sure if I ever actually wanted to have sex with him since he often used guilt and manipulation to pressure me into it. I believe all of you who are coming forward with your stories about him. He's not a good person and should be avoided. #MeToo

Likes: 482

Comments: 15

Shares: 6


Sharpay Evans

Status: I have been waiting for over a year to see this guy finally get served the karma that was coming back around for him. Last year, about four other girls and I were changing in the locker room after gym when we heard the shutter sound a phone makes when a picture is being taken. I followed the noise back to the showers that no one uses and found Anthony Brannigan in there zipping up his pants after god knows what. He dove towards me and put his hand over my mouth to muffle my surprised scream. The other girls started making a commotion, but he convinced us to stay quiet and not tell anyone, begging on his knees and explaining that it would ruin him and his parents' reputation. We decided as a group to let him off the hook, but I did get one good slap across his face in before he scurried out. We kept his secret the last year, but now that there are other stories coming out, it seemed like this needed to be shared. I don't doubt what the other girls are saying. Anthony is a sick human and every girl should be warned. #MeToo

Likes: 729

Comments: 26

Shares: 13


I handed the phone back to Taylor and wondered, Did I spark an East High Me Too movement?

I still felt people's eyes on me the rest of the day, but not like they were before. They weren't accusatory stares anymore, but rather curious. The posts from earlier must have validated my story in the public's eye and now they just wanted to know who this Gabriella Montez girl was. I could have felt embarrassed, but knowing that other girls were backing me up made me feel like I belonged to something bigger. This wasn't just about me anymore. This was about a movement and the potential for a change greater than what I could achieve on my own. This was about and for all of us. I'm not alone.

I barely had enough time to hold out my arms and free fall onto my bed before I heard my phone go off. I dragged myself back across the room to where I had dropped my backpack off by my door and reached in for my phone.

Taylor: Do you want to go to the mall? It might help get your mind off of things.

I responded, Sure.

My father dropped me off outside the food court entrance and I met up with Taylor next to a pretzel shop. I looked around the open space and asked her, "So what are we going to do here?"

"Buy some things, and look around at all the other stuff we can't afford."

"Sounds like a plan! Should we start with some snacks?" I suggested.

"Of course!" We walked arm in arm around the food court until settling on a little Mediterranean hole in the wall. We bought a plate of pita and hummus to share and found a spot to eat. I had only nibbled off a few bites from the soft bread when I noticed some familiar people walking around behind her.

"Taylor," I said. "Look who's here."

She followed my eyes behind her and spotted the two guys.

I asked her, "Have you talked to him since the carnival?"

"No," Taylor said.

"Do you want to?"

She bit her bottom lip. "I don't know."

"C'mon, Tay. Don't be shy." I stood from my spot and went out into the walkway where Troy spotted me and smiled.

"Hey Gabriella."

"Hey, do you guys like hummus? We bought too much and could use some help finishing it off."

Chad said, "Oh yeah! I'm always down for free food." He led us back over to Taylor, where he and Troy both pulled up chairs to the table and began attacking the food.

Taylor spoke up, "What are you guys doing here?"

Chad answered, "Looking for a birthday gift for his mom."

Troy said, "We were thinking about going to that perfume shop in here."

Taylor asked, "Does she wear perfume?"

Troy silently thought for a moment, as though it were his first time seriously considering it. "Now that I think about it, I don't know."

"Well," Chad began, wiping his face off with a napkin. "She can start."

Taylor giggled, "What do you know that she likes, Troy?"

"She owns a charm bracelet that my dad got for her a few years back."

I said, "So why don't you buy her a charm?"

"That's what she expects. I always get her a charm. It's a thoughtless gift at this point."

"That's nice that you want to put more thought into it. Taylor and I could help you guys out, if you'd like our opinions on it."

"That'd be great!" Troy threw away our trash and led us out into the heart of the mall.

I glanced into the windows of all the stores we passed by, one candle shop, one custom T-shirt shop, and a few clothing stores. It wasn't until we happened upon a little boutique that I slowed my pace to see everything inside. A stand of hats and a few racks of clothing were situated in the center, walled in by jewelry displays. I glanced ahead to Chad and Taylor slowly walking further away, then back at the jewelry, then back at them again.

"The world is paved with dead squirrels who couldn't make a decision." I spun around to shoot Troy a peculiar glance, when he explained himself, "My dad always says that to my mom when she's taking forever to make up her mind."

"How romantic," I teased.

Troy called ahead to Taylor and Chad, "Guys! Come back here! Gabriella found something."

We entered the shop and immediately dispersed, Taylor and Chad checked out the clothes as I approached the end of a wall of chain necklaces. I paced the length of the wall, allowing my fingers to gently drag over the dangling string thin metal. Once at the end, I turned around to spot Troy sniffing scented candles. I crossed behind a display case of watches and found a few hats. There was lovely grey beanie that I studied, discovering a few subtle threads of white intertwined within the fabric.

"You should put it on," I turned around to find Troy watching me.

I replaced the hat on the pile and started walking away, "You're not supposed to do that. That's how you spread lice."

"That's also how you see if it fits you and looks decent." Troy said, picking up the beanie from the pile and reaching up over my head to pull the hat low over my eyes, then folding it back up above my eyebrows. He took a step back and his blue eyes danced around my face. He reached forward and guided a lock of my hair out from behind my shoulder and placed it over my collarbone. "There," he smiled. "It's a cute look."

"Do you really like it?"

"I do. See it for yourself."

I walked around the racks until I found a mirror and exclaimed, "Whoa."

"Yeah," Troy appeared behind me in the reflection, "whoa."

I brought my hand up to my head and slowly slid the beanie off. "We should get you one."

"Nah, I already have hundreds at home."

"Really? I've never seen you in a beanie before."

Troy joked, "Shows how much you know me."

"How about a scarf?" I went over to a table and removed thick, red infinity scarf from a pile. "Try this on."

Troy took the circular piece of cloth and studied it, his brows furrowed together in confusion. "It doesn't end. Was this a mistake?"

"No, it's an infinity scarf," I explained.

Troy blinked, "What's an infinity scarf?"

"You've never seen an infinity scarf before?"

He shook his head.

"Here, it's easy." I took the scarf from him and reached one side over his head, then crossed it over his chest, and looped it back around his neck. I stepped away and we looked to the side at him in the mirror. In unison, we both began shaking our heads.

Troy took off the scarf and said, "Well, maybe it'll look good on you." He brought the scarf over my head once, but then forget the rest of the process. He stayed frozen with his hands on either side of the scarf, saying, "That's not right."

I giggled, "Cross it, then put it back around my neck again."

He did as I said we took a look at me in the mirror. "See, you can pull it off." Troy pouted. "All of this on you looked good, actually. I think you should buy them. You look really cute. I mean, not like you usually look bad or anything like that. You always look pretty. Am I rambling? Sorry, I like the look is what I'm trying to say."

I tilted my head to the side in consideration, "I think I'll get it." I turned around and smiled at him, "Thank you, my trusty stylist."

"You're welcome," he smiled, his vibrant blue eyes darkening as they slowly closed.

"Are you tired?"

He shook his head, his darkened eyes still on me.

"Then what's that look for?"

A small smile appeared on his face, "I'm not entirely sure."


A /N: I thought I should explain why this chapter is so divided. It might have seemed strange to go from heavy inner monologue about validation to "here's some cute stuff that happened at the mall today!" Although they don't bring it up, everyone knows what happened. So although Troy and Chad never mention it to them at the mall, they are still fully aware of what's going on with Gabriella. So why aren't they saying anything? Well, Chad isn't as close to Gabriella as Troy and Taylor so it'd probably be an inappropriate and too personal of a topic to bring up with him around. And when you see someone who's going through a tough time finally smile, you don't want to remind them about the bad things and kill their good mood. Taylor wanted to take Gabriella to the mall to get her mind off of things and that's exactly what they achieved. I just didn't want anyone to assume that Troy is ignorant of or ignoring Gabriella's situation. It just wasn't the right time to bring it up yet. Troy and Gabriella will have a one-on-one scene in the next chapter that will show his reaction to her situation. As always, thank you for reading and please leave a review.