Disclaimer: I don't own Fairly OddParents.
Author's Note: Constructive criticism welcomed, particularly on characterization.
Chapter 11: Mattress King
Anti-Cosmo was revolted by the cute softness of Mattress World. It was so benevolent. He smiled. Perfect for weakening Yuggotamians.
Anti-Cosmo spotted a fairy wearing pajamas and holding a scepter. Oh, bugger! The Sandman. Anti-Cosmo had once seen first hand how fierce the Sandman could be if the future of sleep was threatened.
"Hey? What gives? My Anti-Fairy alarm went off!" said the Sandman, sounding annoyed, "you're making me lose sales!"
Anti-Cosmo grinned. The Sandman had a problem with losing sales? He figured that he could use that.
"If you give me Mattress World, I'll pay you twice the amount that all your customers would," said Anti-Cosmo.
"What gives? I can't lose my gig," protested Sandman, "if I lose it, the Pixies might take it. I like my gig. It's nap-tastic."
Anti-Cosmo mused over that. The Sandman didn't want to lose either his gig or his possible future money.
"You can keep your store and your powers," said Anti-Cosmo, "but you must clear it with us every time you use your powers. I will pay you ten times the money you lose whenever you waste your time talking to unnecessary people."
"Very well! I will return to my mattresses! Time is money and money is gorgeous!"
The Sandman POOFed away in a swirl of sand.
Anti-Cosmo smiled and picked up a few mattresses. Now that he had Mattress World, it was time to conquer Yuggotamia.
ANTI-POOF!
Norm wondered why Anti-Cosmo wasn't anywhere on Earth. Then it occurred to him that Anti-Cosmo was Cosmo's Anti-Fairy and since Cosmo was one of the biggest idiots ever born, Anti-Cosmo probably was one of the most intelligent Anti-Fairies in existence. Therefore, he had probably realized that someone trying to stop him would think he'd go to Earth next, and plan around that.
Even though according to Norm's watch it was night, no one was asleep. Norm groaned. Anti-Cosmo had evidently conquered Mattress World and he hadn't been there to stop him.
Norm figured that since mattress were cute and soft, they were good weapons against Yuggotamians, and therefore Anti-Cosmo was going to conquer Yuggotamia. Norm groaned. Yuggotamia was so gross, and he hated gross stuff! Ah well, if he wanted to save Chester, Calais, Hawaii, numerous go-kart tracks, fancy restaurants that he liked to date dames at, baseball and several other things he cared about, he had to go to Yuggotamia.
Calais was feeling impatient with Norm. How long could saving the world take? It wasn't as though he had to destroy all of Lord Voldemort's Horcruxes or something really long and difficult like that.
Calais felt sure that she could probably help Norm without having to go to Anti-Fairy World. No one was asleep, so Mattress World was probably conquered. Calais wondered if Anti-Cosmo did that, so he could weaken the Yuggotamians. She figured she could help stop Anti-Cosmo in Yuggotamia, as long as he didn't spot her.
A genie dame could save the world just as well as a genie guy could!
