Sorry for the long wait. Had a job and then quit. Don't ask. I got a new job though so this is going to get done as fast as possible.

Firefly: Is everyone here?

Steve: I think so.

Firefly: Ok, just so nobody makes any smartass remarks. It this play Shawn will be talking to the camera.

Hunter: Ok. You didn't have to say anything.

Firefly: Yes, I did. I don't trust you.

Hunter : I'm hurt.

Firefly: Get over it.

Shawn

He acknowledges Ric with a pathetic flutter of his eyelids.

BEDROOM.

Linda(She strokes Shawns' hair.):I hope you feel better, pumpkin.

She leans down and kisses his forehead. Ric pats his shoulder.

Ric: Get some rest.

Shawn lets out a wheeze. His glassy eyes follow his parents to the door.

Linda (OC): We love you, sweetie.

Ric (OC): Call if you need us.

Hunter: What kid in their right mind would call?

Firefly: They think he is really sick. They have to say that.

Hunter: If hes that sick, he may not be able to get out of bed.

They close the door. The lock clicks. Shawns' eyes shift from the door to CAMERA. A sly, little smile crawls across his lips.

Shawn: They bought it.

The MTV theme music ROARS IN.

TV SCREEN

The TV at the foot of Shawns' bed. The MTV logo is playing.

BEDROOM

Shawn yanks open the drapes. The pall of the sickroom disappears in the brilliant glow of morning sunlight.

Shawn: Incredible! One of the worst performances of my career and they never doubted it for a second. (looks out the window) What a beautiful day!

He turns from the window.

Shawn: Parents always fall for the clammy hands. It's physical evidence of illness. It's a good, non-specific symptom. Parents are generally pretty hip to the fever scams. And to make them work you have to go a hundred and one, hundred and two. You get a nervous mother and you end up in a doctor's office and that's worse than school.

He flips on his stereo and fills the room with the MTV broadcast. A NEW SONG begins.

Shawn: Fake a stomach cramp and when you're doubled over, moaning and wailing, just lick your palms. It's a little stupid and childish but then so if high school. Right?

He equalizes the sound a little.

Hunter: That is Shawn in a nutshell.

Firefly: You just can't help yourself, can you?

Hunter: Nope.

Shawn: This is my ninth sick day with semester. If I go for ten, I'm probably going to have to barf up a lung. So, I absolutely must make this one count.

He exits into the hallway.

BATHROOM

Shawn walks into the bathroom. It's littered with Mickie's debris. He turns on the shower water.

Shawn: I don't care if you're fifty five or seven, everybody needs a day off now and then. It's a beautiful day. How can I be expected to handle high school?

He bends down OUT OF FRAME as he loses his briefs. He pops up.

Firefly: Don't say a word.

Hunter: Wasn't going to.

Firefly: Yeah right.

Shawn: I do actually have a test. That wasn't bullshit.

He steps into the shower. Through the pebbled glass of the shower door we see Shawns' outline.

Shawn: That I care about it was.

BATHROOM. SHOWER STALL.

Inside the shower. Shawns' hair is standing straight up. It's moulded into a fin with shampoo.

Shawn: It's on European socialism. I mean, really. What's the point? I'm not European. I don't plan to be European. So, who gives a shit if they're socialists? They could be fascist anarchists and it still wouldn't change the fact that I don't own a car.

He turns the shower head around and uses it like a microphone.

Shawn: Do I have to sing?

Firefly: Yes.

Shawn(sings): WELL SHAKE IT UP, BABY, TWIST AND SHOUT...

HALLWAY. LATER

Shawn comes out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist. He's drying his hair with another of a different color.

Shawn: Not that I condone fascism. Or and "isms". "Isms", in my opinion are not good. A person should not believe in an "ism". He should believe in himself. John Lennon said it on his first solo album. "I don't believe in Beatles, I just believe in me." A good point there. Afterall, he was the Walrus.

He opens a linen closet and tosses the towel in it.

Shawn: I could be the Walrus and I'd still have to bum rides off people.

He passes CAMERA and goes into his room.

Shawn (OC): I'm not very political? Let me put that into perspective...

Firefly: Ok cut.

Hunter: That wasn't so bad.

Firefly: Goodbye.

Hope you all like. R/R.