Chapter 5: Hogsmeade

"So, where would you like to go first?" said Remus as he walked alongside Oliana. Hogsmeade shined with the light of morning.

"Oh, anywhere, I guess," she mumbled as she walked with Remus. "I, uh, I guess we could go to Madam Puttifoot's. I mean, if you're into that kind of thing."

Remus felt a weight drop into his stomach. "Sure," he said.

He led the way into the shop, and pulled out the chair for Oli. It seemed every boy-girl couple in a fifty-mile radius had decided on breakfast at Puttifoot's. Around him, flirting teenagers talked and snogged without pausing to breath. Oli sat in front of him, blushing a little and totally silent. A sudden fear came over him that he'd spend this date not saying a single word to her. But what was he supposed to say?

The chattering in the restaurant got louder, muddling his thoughts. Was it just him or was everyone staring? Oh, God, what if that weren't Oli across from him; what if it were Sirius? People would be staring. People would definitely be staring. Sirius was out with Emma. Remus searched the crowded room to see if they were here. He stopped himself, forcing his eyes down into his lap. He didn't care if Sirius was here. He didn't care if Sirius was here, watching him blunder through this date.

"Remus, are you okay?" Oli said, frowning at him, "You've been quiet for a while, you know?"

"No," he replied, "I mean, yes. I'm quiet. Sorry. Um, no, I'm not okay. I'm not feeling… well, I have a lot on my mind."

"You can talk to me about it," Oli offered. She smiled, her eyes alight with compassion. Remus held back a small, bitter laugh.

"I'm sorry. Maybe this was wrong. I, uh, just have really been having some relationship problems."

"Oh, I-I'm sorry to hear. You're such a nice guy," she said. She paused for a moment, studying him. She looked uncertain. "You don't really like me, do you, Remus?"

"Of course, I like you!" he said instantly.

"I should've known," she said casually. "I mean, we have so many classes together, and I thought perhaps you were just shy. I was hoping that you'd ask me out, of course. You obviously like someone else, though. You've only said one word to me all morning."

His chest constricted tightly. "I am so sorry," he said. "I've ruined our date." He stared at his hands, finding it incredibly hard to tell the truth while looking into Oli's large, dark eyes. "I'm no good at this kind of stuff. You really are charming and lovely, and I wish this were somehow easier for me. I just--"

"Let's be friends," she interrupted. "That's okay, you know? For us to just be friends." Her smile was wide and genuine. "Would you walk me to the Three Broomsticks?"

"I'd love to," said Remus, and he took Oli's hand and they walked away from the café as friends.

*

Remus jumped up the grand staircase two steps at a time. Mentally, he was preparing a speech to tell to Sirius. He wanted to lay down the rules of a relationship, something they would both be happy with, without anyone needing to know that they were, well, whatever is was that they were exactly. The Fat Lady swung open and he stepped in, the opening sentence of the speech fresh in his mind, ready to be written down and perfected.

"What are you doing here?"

Remus spun around at hearing Sirius's voice. Suddenly, everything he'd thought of was gone. "I can't remember…. What are you doing here? You're supposed to be, I don't know, out having fun with Emma, right?"

"Called it off."

"What, why?"

"Because she wasn't who I wanted."

Remus looked at the floor. "Who did you want?"

"No one. I'm becoming a monk, mate, didn't I tell you? It's going to be fantastic, I can already see it. So, what ever happened to Oli? Did she dump you?

"Dump me?"

"Sure. I figured since you actually liked her, there'd be no way it'd end otherwise."

"Okay, I lied. You're mad at me, I get it."

"Why'd you lie?"

"To hurt you the way you hurt me."

"Which is why I'm becoming celibate."

"What are you talking about?" Remus said as he sat on the table across from Sirius.

"There's a lot less hurt to be had without putting oneself in harm's way. Or love's way. Same thing, really."

"Why are you being like this? Why are you being so cynical?"

"Me being cynical about love? Well, isn't that the cauldron calling the--"

"Sirius, this isn't a game to me!"

"And it was to me? Is that why you thought it was okay to try and make me jealous and to lead Oliana on? Because it's a game?"

"No," Remus said. "I came up here because I didn't want to be with her. And you were right and, I don't know, I wanted to fix things between us, but you're being a complete arse."

Sirius sighed and fell into an armchair. "... fix things between us..." he mumbled.

"What?" Remus pried.

"I said, you can't just fix things between us. I don't know what kind of relationship you think is worth having if we can only look at each other when it's too dark to see."

"It's going to be really hard, but of course it'd be worth it."

"I can't commit to you in secrecy, Remus. It's not possible. I'm a slut, and people know it." Sirius smirked. Remus, however, did not think this was funny.

"You just don't get it, do you?" he yelled, suddenly furious, throwing his arms open with desperation. "Do you not comprehend what people will think and say and do to you if they find out you like blokes? Life through rose colored glasses at Hogwarts school for the infamous slut Sirius Black! Because everyone loves you and adores you, they will accept you and move on? You are completely deluded!" Remus paused, and then spat out the word, "Faggot."

"W-what? What did you just--"

"Queer!"

"Remus, stop--"

"Fairy, twink, cock-sucker--"

"HEY!" Sirius shouted, "I get it, okay! I get it."

One hot, unavoidable tear rolled over Remus's eyelashes. He pulled the sleeve of his robe across his face roughly. "Do you?" he said just before he found himself folded into Sirius's arms.

"I want you. People won't understand. Don't you see that?" Remus said into Sirius's shoulder.

Sirius kissed Remus hard. "I'm sorry," he said as they broke apart. He looked at Remus, "Will you be my boyfriend, Lupin?"

"On two conditions," Remus said back. "We can't tell anyone about us, or let anyone know. You might be ready for that kind of hate, but I'm not."

"Okay."

"And you're not allowed to go on dates with anyone but me," smirked Remus, "regardless of how it affects your slut-image."

"Okay," Sirius said, leaning in to kiss Remus.

Sirius's lips were soft and warm and sugar-sweet.

"Shouldn't we head back to Hogsmeade," said Remus. "Mischief-making at the Three Broomsticks, remember?"

"In a minute," Sirius said, "Let me kiss you some more."

Remus was okay with that.

*

The two entered the Three Broomsticks together, where they saw James at the bar trying to flirt his way into a free round of drinks for the table.

"Rosemerta," he gushed, "You are just, uh, just so beautiful today."

"Go away, Mr. Potter," said the pretty young barmaid. "Oh, hello, Sirius, Remus."

James rolled his eyes and greeted his friends, each of them grabbing a butterbeer from the bar.

"Moony, Padfoot," James insisted in an undertone as they walked towards the table where Peter and Lily sat, "You guys are my best mates, but this date with Lily is going really well, so make yourselves scarce in, like, half an hour, okay?" The three marauders took seats. Emma and Oliana happened to be in a far booth; they looked over at the group rather sulkily.

"So, about this year's prank," began James but he was cut off by Lily.

"You know, as Head Boy, you should really be investing your time in stopping silly pranks," she said, "not planning them."

He had a misty look about him. "You're right, Lily."

"Whipped," Sirius muttered under his breath.

After they'd finished their drinks, Remus and Sirius excused themselves from the table, saying they'd meet up in the common room later that night. James forcefully elbowed Peter.

Wormtail looked annoyed, got up to leave, and said, "I have a meeting to get to, anyway."

*

Some time later, Remus exited Dervish and Banges with Sirius, throughly enjoying the time they were spending together. The deep orange sun glared at Remus just over the top of the building in front of him. The late-afternoon was unusually warm, making everything seem slow and content.

Suddenly, a huge blast and a shattering noise pierced the thick air as every window in Hogsmeade exploded from its frame in a shower of glittering shards. People began running and screaming. The door to Dervish and Banges was gone, scattered in small pieces across the ground. Hooded figures were emerging from alleys; frightened students were hiding in otherwise abandoned shops, behind counters. Sirius and Remus, to shocked to move, seemed to be the only ones left in the street besides these cloaked and masked beings.

"Death Eaters," Sirius choked out. He grabbed Remus's elbow. "Death Eaters in Hogsmeade."


AN- Reviews would kick so much ass.