"Gaara!" Sakura banged on the door to his apartment, frowning a moment when she realized it was late at night… which meant he might not be able to answer it. A light growl of annoyance escaped her lips as she placed her hands on her hips. They haven't seen one another in about a week or so, and she wasn't sure if he was avoiding her on purpose, so this whole situation was annoying.
She banged on the door again, "Gaara Sabaku if you don't open this damn door-!"
When she lifted her fist to hit it again, the door opened and she flew forwards slightly; nearly falling into his chest. Sakura straightened herself out and dusted herself off before looking at him curiously. His hair was disheveled and he wasn't wearing a shirt. Oh… he… wasn't…
Sakura felt her cheeks light up in embarrassment. "Er… I didn't know you would be sleeping." She mumbled this, obviously not wanting to even admit what she had done was wrong. Most of the time Gaara didn't sleep, so the fact that she ruined his chances, well… it made her feel bad.
Gaara blinked; "It's around one in the morning, what the hell else would I be doing woman?"
She huffed in frustration, "I don't know! Writing for your forum?!" She almost wanted to smack him in the face for making her feel this way, but she did wake him up so she couldn't do that. Sakura was already embarrassed enough seeing him half-naked.
"If you wanted to complain about me being asleep, can we do it some other time?" He rubbed his eyes and it made her sigh. Before she could say anything, he yawned. "What do you want?"
His tone hurt her feelings. "I needed to ask you something."
"And that couldn't wait until the morning?"
Sakura pushed him backwards, brushing past him so she could situate herself in his apartment. Gaara sighed and shut the door, moving towards the living room which is where she placed herself at. She turned towards him, holding up the pendant. A look of surprise appeared on his face when realization dawned on him.
"Why was this back in my book? I swore I gave it back to you."
Gaara was eerily quiet, which was unusual… even for him. "It must have fallen back in."
She gave him a look of disbelief, "Are you for real? It must have fallen back in?" Sakura stalked towards him and that made Gaara feel painfully exposed. "Why did you put it back in my book Gaara? Isn't this important to you?"
He crossed his arms over his chest, "You were using it as a bookmark, why wouldn't I place it back?"
Sakura's mouth opened and closed, as if she was trying to decipher his stupidity for a moment. "Gaara… I swear to…" She sighed and rubbed her temples in frustration; "You mean to tell me this doesn't have a deeper meaning?" When she said 'this', she held the pendant up higher as if to prove her point even further.
"No, it doesn't." His tone was unusually harsh with her for the first time since he's known her. He could see the look of hurt behind her eyes, which made him frown intensely. Tears began to slide down her cheeks as she gritted her teeth to try and keep herself from crying, though it wasn't working well enough.
"So, you sticking the pendant back into my book meant nothing? I mean nothing to you?"
Gaara reached out towards her, though his hand remained immobile in the air. Luckily, she had her eyes closed so she wouldn't see his attempts fail as he placed his hand back down to his side. When she looked at him again, he was already glancing away… like the coward he was. "You mean…" He paused, "More to me than you know Sakura."
Sakura moved towards him again, slowly this time; "Then tell me the truth Gaara."
When she stopped in front of him, he felt himself inhale sharply at her scent. "Sakura there is nothing more to what I told you. I didn't want you to feel bad about it, so I stuck it back in your book."
A light laugh released from her lips, "You must think I am an absolute moron to believe that. First it was it may have fallen in, to you placing it back as a bookmark for me, and now it's you didn't want me to feel bad about it? Gaara are you afraid to tell me what you truly think?"
Gaara shook his head and moved away from her, heading towards the his windows so he could stare down at the bustling city below them; "It meant nothing Sakura."
He didn't need to look at her to tell she was crying again, knowing his words upset her. Gaara knew he felt something for her, but this was too fast, wasn't it? They barely knew each other…
"That's it then?" Her voice was shaky but she didn't sound like she was crying. When he turned to look at her, he could see the hurt; betrayal; and anger hidden behind those emerald hues he came to adore. Sakura took the pendant and moved towards him, thrusting it into his hands. "Here. Since you wish to be a coward."
Her eyes met his own and he growled in response, "You know what? Fine, I am a coward. Do you wish to understand how I feel? Take a good look. I have been alone all my life, and you wish to assume you know who I am? You don't know me Sakura Haruno; in fact, you barely know me at all."
Those words caused her eyes to waver, and she looked down at the floor. "You're right. I don't know you. Every time I ask, you shut me out, and I know you're afraid Gaara. But isn't that how you know you're on the way to something real?"
Gaara realized she did not let go of his hand, which caused him to glance away from her for a moment. "Sakura… I can't."
Her hand moved towards his cheek, and she forced him to look at her; "Gaara… allow me to rescue you from your loneliness like you did for me all those years ago from those bullies."
"You remembered?"
"Yes." She swallowed slightly when she felt his breath on her lips. She could tell he wasn't sure of his actions, and he was nervous with what he was doing in that moment. Hell, Sakura was more nervous than she ever imagined she could be. It reminded her of that time she confessed her 'love' for Sasuke, though that didn't mean much to her… not like this.
Gaara's lips brushed hers lightly; "I… can't." He was too afraid for her. Too afraid for him. He was a broken shell, a man who would barely know how to love her like she deserved. She didn't need to be around someone like that; though he figured she would have left by now if she truly found him to be a lost cause.
Sakura's hold on him tightened and she bent her head so their lips weren't touching as much as they were beforehand. "Gaara… you… I don't…" Her words didn't make sense. He could tell she was hurting, but there wasn't much she could say to him to make him decide he wanted her instead of this loneliness he placed himself in.
She shook her head and pulled away, moving so she could start for the door. "Thank you for your answer, despite how painful it was." She wasn't sure what she could do at this point, and she was tired of crying; even if she hadn't been doing it long. Perhaps she was just a fool for thinking this meant something more to him.
When she left his apartment, he stared at the door, and looked around at the walls that started to close in around him. For the first time, the silence that usually comforted the red head now only suffocated him.
"You have been holed up in this apartment for days Sakura. Get your ass out here." Ino yelled as she banged on the door, though the next attempt was stopped by Tenten who held onto her wrist.
A soft sigh came from the brunette, "Perhaps we give her time. We don't even know what happened…" Though that wasn't entirely the case. She knew the pinkette called Ino and left an indelicate voicemail about what transpired between her and Gaara that night. Tenten was always the logical one, wishing to hear both sides to every story before deciding on who was right.
Ino growled and placed her hands on her hips, "I don't give a rat's ass if we don't have every detail from that bastard of a redhead who hurt my best friend." She turned towards the door again and yelled, "Sakura either I am going in there or I am going to find Gaara! It's your choice!"
With a momentary pause, the blond finally heard the door beginning to unlock, but what the sight was… well, it wasn't something Ino thought she would ever see. Sakura was drunk. At ten in the morning.
She was taken aback for a moment and glanced at Tenten who was just as surprised as she was. "Sakura… you're drunk. Why the hell are you drunk!? Don't you have work tonight?"
As she took in her best friend's appearance, she frowned. The pinkette's cheeks were flushed and her eyes were half-lidded, while she held onto a beer bottle in her hand. She didn't even like beer! She also smelled like a brewery so there was that too.
"I am on leave from the hospital now. I can do whatever the fuck I want." She slurred, and nearly fell over. Ino felt her lips purse into a fine line. This was as bad as her confession to Sasuke, but at that time, they were teenagers and all she could do was lock herself in her room. Now she was locked in her apartment and drunk to the point where Ino was sure she couldn't even tell who was standing in front of her.
"Your banging is loud; do you mind going away? I have some movies to finish."
Being pregnant, Ino didn't have the upper hand, but luckily Tenten was there with her. Tenten pushed the pinkette into the apartment and waited until Ino was inside before she slammed the door closed. Her eyes widened at the amount of mess the apartment was in as well, but she didn't have time to care about that. She grabbed the bottle from Sakura who grumbled in protest, and simply poured the rest of it out.
"Hey! I paid for that!"
Tenten growled, "And you'll pay for more if you don't stop being stupid." She turned towards the girl who was barely able to stand on her own, "I never thought I'd see the day when Sakura Haruno turned pathetic over some guy."
Sakura leaned on the wall and slid down, moving to hold her knees close to her chest. "It's not just some guy." She said barely above a whisper, and this was when the two women calmed themselves down. It wasn't the time to scold her when what she truly needed were friends to be there for her.
The brunette kneeled next to her, "I don't get this. You and Gaara didn't even talk that long."
Ino placed a hand on her shoulder and simply shook her head when Tenten glanced back at her. "Don't you remember in high school when you had a huge crush on Hinata's cousin Neji, and when he turned you down, you became a mess? This is the same concept."
Who could forget that day? Tenten had confessed her feelings for Neji in front of the entire cafeteria. Neji looked uncomfortable and quietly said he didn't feel the same. Tenten felt so broken, and couldn't look at another guy in any way until she met Lee a few years ago. She and Lee had gone out a couple of times, and knew this thing she felt with Gaara was real; despite the short time.
"You're right…" Tenten muttered softly.
Sakura whimpered and wiped her eyes after she looked at them again. "Call it obsession, love, or lust. Whatever you guys want. I know how I feel even if we haven't known one another long. When I am with him, time doesn't matter because it's now. We're here now and that's what we focus on."
Ino sat down next to her best friend and wrapped an arm around her to pull her closer. "I think Gaara has feelings for you Sakura. He just… he doesn't know how to express them. I discussed this with his brother and Kankuro says the same thing. Gaara grew up in a complicated home, and he's never even looked in the direction of girls. Until you."
Sakura chuckled and wiped her eyes, "When you put it that way, it sounds cliché."
"Maybe it is, who cares? Gaara danced with you at my wedding and does plenty of things that shows a man who adores a woman, but he doesn't understand it."
Sakura rubbed her eyes sleepily and knew Ino was right, but for some reason, it didn't help the pain in her chest. "Maybe I am pathetic. I couldn't help myself… I felt… so strongly for him." Tenten moved to sit on the other side of her and the two girls held the pinkette close. Sakura realized even in her pain, having friends by her side helped ease that pain… even if it was short-lived.
After her visit with Sakura, she parted ways with Tenten and headed in the direction of Gaara's apartment. "You are dead Sabaku." Ino growled once she was inside and banging on the door even louder than she had when she was with Sakura. After they held onto the girl for a while, Sakura eventually sobered up and they all ate ice cream in their pajamas. It was something they did when Sakura was rejected by Sasuke, when Tenten was rejected by Neji, and even when Ino was denied by Sasuke. It felt good to be with her two friends.
Now she had a plan. She had to figure out a way to get these idiots together, otherwise neither one of them would make the damn move.
She knocked on it again until she heard a mumbled, "Go the fuck away" on the other side of the door. She frowned and kicked it, "You either open this door or I tear it down and you know me Sabaku, I will rip it right from its hinges." She was exaggerating of course. She was pregnant, there wasn't much she could do in this situation. Perhaps she should have had Kankuro come with her.
Gaara sighed, defeated, and opened it. Now Ino hadn't seen the male in a long time and was amazed to see his appearance look as bad as Sakura's. Why did she have to always deal with morons? "Wow your eyes look sunken in as much as they were when I saw you a while ago." She couldn't remember when it was, so she wasn't entirely sure how long it truly has been.
"Are you here to insult my appearance? Otherwise we can do it when I see you at the dinner at your house next weekend."
Ino snorted before slamming her hand against the door when he tried to shut it in front of her face. "Do you realize Sakura is as bad off as you?"
For a moment she could see his eyes flicker with something, but she couldn't tell what it was. "Is that my problem?" Ino knew he wasn't wrong since it technically wasn't his problem, but he was the one who caused it, and he would fix it.
"How about you stop being an asshole and realize what you did was wrong? I may not know you well enough Gaara, but with Kankuro being your brother, I think I have a good idea. You care for Sakura, why don't you just be with her already?"
His anger exploded, "I have nothing to say to you because it's none of your fucking business in the first-place woman."
When Ino nearly threw him backwards, he was shocked, mostly because he didn't know her strength. She stalked forward and pushed her finger into his chest, "It became my business when you broke my best friend's heart. Fine, you want to be pathetic then stay here and be alone." She straightened herself out and wiped her outfit. "I suppose there's nothing I can do."
Her icy blue eyes, which were usually optimistic, held a sad look behind them. "We may not be close, but I want you happy just like her. I wish you could understand your feelings." She said this before leaving, not even bothering to close the door.
Gaara stepped towards it and was about to call after her when he realized she was gone and he was once again alone. He held his hand on the door and looked down before he closed it again. He headed into the living room which held his final novel. Looking at it, he took it off the coffee table, and briefly scanned the portion where he stated who he wrote it for.
Even though he was in the process of this novel before he met Sakura, he finished it because of her. 'To Sakura, the muse that allowed this book to even finish.' He pursed his lips into a fine line and flipped through the ending of the book, knowing he wrote down what he wished he said to Sakura instead.
Kiyoshi had managed to tell his feelings to the girl who was there for him at the end of this book. Maybe that's all he could do. Maybe he could show her with this how he felt. Or was it too late? Gaara got dressed and managed to mail off the book towards Sakura's address, deciding it was something he could do. He realized she would know he lied to her about being a forum writer, but… maybe that wasn't a bad thing.
When he paid the man, and headed off in the direction of his own apartment; thoughts swirled in his mind on how she would take it. He even wrote a note to her that he left in one of the pages. He never revealed that he was the author, so this was a big step for him.
Gaara hoped it wasn't too late and hoped she would accept his apology. Though the only thing he could do was wait.
