Black And Blue
AllzStar
I heard his boots crunching through the twigs and weeds and things as he approached me. His hand came down on my shoulder.
"Peter?"
When I didn't look at him he came around to face me. His smile faded when he saw my expression. "Peter?" he said again. "What's the matter?"
For a moment I considered telling Edmund what had just happened. Then I defined 'stupid' and got my marbles back. "I…was…just thinking…about this Caspian person…I don't know, uh…what if…."
Edmund patted me on the shoulder and then took me by the neck, steering me away from my spot of solitude in a brotherly way. He knew something was up. He also knew I didn't want to talk about it.
The dawn was just breaking as we arrived back to our little campsite. Edmund gave me another gentle smack on the back before heading off with Trumpkin to find breakfast. Susan was still fast asleep.
I rubbed my face and tried to forget about it. I couldn't believe how stupid I was being about this whole thing. She doesn't remember, said a harsh, cruel voice in the back of my mind. She doesn't know who you are.
But she'd let me kiss her.
I groaned and sat down on the mushy grass, my face in my hands. After dad left for the war, my mom was heartbroken. She cried for days. I had vowed then never to fall in love, to save myself that disappointment.
When I allowed myself to love Jaxx I had thought I could handle it. If I could lead an entire army of creatures—living, breathing things—to war, not knowing what the hell I was doing, I could handle loving a girl, right?
And then Jaxx fell. I didn't see her wake up, but I knew she wouldn't remember me when she did.
I could no longer suppress the cry of agony that was lodged inside of me.
I had been wrong. I couldn't handle heartbreak, not twice. It was bad enough the first time. The worst part was that she didn't remember me…at all!
I wrenched myself from my little pity party. These emotions were fighting each-other on the inside, but I couldn't let the pain of that battle show on my face or in my body language. I couldn't let anyone see this agony…not Susan, or Lucy…and especially Jaxx.
I stood up and was about to go put out the fire when I realized something was terribly wrong. Now that Trumpkin and Edmund had gone out to hunt, Susan was the only sleeping bundle left.
Where—the—hell—are—Jaxx—and—Lucy?
I leapt over the fire and then sprung over Susan (who all this time hadn't stirred a bit), and sprinted into the woods. They couldn't have wandered far. They…they couldn't….
Something orange caught my eye as I was running. I skidded to a halt and looked to see Lucy. Her back was to me, and she was peering over the top of a large shrubbery. Beyond her, a Minotaur was skulking along the area. I had a hunch Lucy hadn't seen him yet….
I crept up on her and clamped a hand over her mouth, pulling her down to the forest floor. Her eyes grew very wide when she saw me, and I was surprised to see panic in them.
"Oh, Peter, stop them—they're fighting!" she whimpered. She pressed her palms to her eyes and seemed to be suppressing sobs.
I got to my feet and looked. I had been wrong. There were about seven Minotaurs, along with several dwarves, fauns, and centaurs. They had all gathered in a circle around two people.
There were loud clangs as the metal of their swords clashed.
To my horror, one of the people was Jaxx. Her blonde hair was coming loose from its knot and the stray bits were either plastered to her sweating forehead or billowing out around her.
I didn't know who the other person was. He was tall, and maybe about eighteen years old. His hair was long and dark and his skin had an olive tone to it. His face was screwed up in concentration as he fought Jaxx; his eyes were beady and black.
I went to draw my sword and was devastated to find that it wasn't there. My scabbard was, though—it hung limp on my hip. But the sword was gone.
Jaxx. I looked at her, saw my sword clutched in her hand.
She appeared to be losing the battle. She was blocking more than she was attacking.
Suddenly the young man parried and Jaxx was caught off guard. He jabbed forward and the tip of his weapon sliced through Jaxx's skin just below her collar bone. She stumbled a bit, and then the young man went in for the kill.
As fast as I could, I grabbed a large rock that, fortunately, was lying at my feet. I aimed to chuck it at the boy's head, but suddenly a voice behind me screamed, "STOP!"
The sword fighting stopped, the cheering stopped, and the blood pulsing in my temples died down as well. Everyone turned to look at Lucy, who was staring at the scene incredulously.
"Stop this!" she cried.
Jaxx's eyes were wide and she was panting from excursion. I wondered how long they had been fighting. Dirt was smeared across her face and sweat had beaded on her forehead.
She looked at the young man, whose sword was still raised in attack mode. He stared at Lucy, and then at me. I gave him my best glare. I remembered Jaxx telling me once that the perfect phrase to describe me would be "If looks could kill"….
A though suddenly crossed my mind. The boy's armour was of a superior quality, and all his features screamed Telmarine. Not to mention there were dozens of Narnians gathered around. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen it before.
"Prince…Caspian?" I asked slowly.
"Yes," he said, giving his sword a little bit of slack, "and who are you?"
"Peter!" I turned to see Susan, Edmund and Trumpkin dashing up the hill. They stopped short when they saw the situation at hand.
Prince Caspian was eyeing me cautiously. "High King Peter?"
I dropped the rock and cleared my throat. "I believe you called."
Caspian sheathed his sword and walked towards me. "I—"
A sword appeared from around him and was held tightly at his throat. He gasped and struggled, grunting.
Jaxx's face appeared next to his as she leaned to speak in his ear. "Never turn your back on your opponents, your Majesty," she hissed. Then she let him go.
Caspian whipped around and grabbed Jaxx's face. She didn't protest, but her eyes were like smouldering coals as she glowered at the Telmarine, who met her gaze with an equal look of hatred. Then comprehension crossed his face and he let Jaxx go. There were red marks on her cheeks where his fingers had been. My fists were clenched so tight my knuckles were white.
"I suppose you are Lady Carmen," Caspian grunted.
My mouth popped open as Susan and I exchanged panicked looks.
"What?" Jaxx said, her face a perfect picture of confusion.
Caspian's lip curled slightly. "Are you not Carmen-Marie, Lady Knight of Narnia?" He didn't wait for an answer. Instead he turned to address us all. "I thought you'd be…older."
I was struggling to keep my temper under control despite the red-hot fury that bubbling inside me at Caspian's attitude towards Jaxx. "Well if you like, we can come back in a few years," I snapped.
Caspian's eyes widened. "No! No, it's alright. You're not exactly what I expected." He searched all of our faces, and his gaze lingered on Susan.
"Neither are you," Edmund retorted, smirking. He walked towards Caspian. As he passed me he once again patted my shoulder. "Keep smiling," he murmured to me.
I grimaced. Easier said than done, Ed…
*
The journey to Aslan's How, thankfully, was not a long one. In fact, we had been only a kilometre from it the whole time.
It was frightfully warm out, and I ended up piling my long hair on top of my head in a messy bun to keep my neck relatively cool.
As Susan and I walked side-by-side, I found her to be unusually quiet. She was fiddling with her hands; her eyes were always on the ground.
"What's the matter?" I asked once.
She didn't answer.
When we got to the How, I was surprised to see how different my idea of it had been from the real thing. It was an underground chamber with carvings of Lions and other Narnian creatures all over the walls. In the center of the vast room was a large stone slate, cracked clean in the center. Directly behind it was a massive carving of a great, majestic lion. I took this to be Aslan as I gazed at it in wonder.
The room got quite cramped as the five humans and all those Narnians crowded in. Lucy and I sat on the stone dais, facing the crowd. Peter and Caspian stood with their backs to us as they discussed battle methods and plans.
As they argued, I let my mind wander to the morning's events.
I had fallen asleep on the bank of the lake, but had been woken up by a little man, a dwarf like Trumpkin, who had been observing me in my sleep. He had been frightened when I woke and ran away. Instinctively, I rushed after him, pausing to take Peter's sword (he hadn't been there).
I had followed the unfamiliar dwarf through the trees until he led me to a clearing. When I had approached him with my sword at the ready, he had turned and vanished. That was when Prince Caspian had attacked me. We had fought until Lucy intervened; so about two hours.
"Jaxx? Jaxx!"
I was pulled from my reverie and sat blinking stupidly at Peter. His face was blank.
"Will you please come join the council?" he asked.
"Oh." I blinked again. "I didn't know I was being included.
"Well, that shouldn't have stopped you from listening to the plans, should it?" Peter said coldly, turning away from me.
I frowned and joined the temperamental boy and Prince Caspian on the dais. Peter explained the plans of attack to me, and I was surprised at how easily I caught on to everything.
They were plotting to take over the Telmarine castle (Caspian's uncle, Lord Miraz, was trying to take over Telmar and Narnia by claiming the throne that wasn't his. Since his wife had produced an heir, Miraz was ready to be crowned. The only thing standing in his way was Caspian, the true heir to the throne). Peter, Caspian, Susan, Edmund and I would be flown in by Griffins in hopes that we could open the castle's gate for the rest of the army. Edmund, using his handy-dandy torch, would be standing watch in a watch tower and would give the signal to the army when the gate was open. Caspian and Susan were to concentrate on keeping any guards that saw us from ringing the bell that signalled intruders while Peter and I opened the gate.
The plan seemed pretty logical to me, except for one little bit.
"And what if the warning bell is sounded and all the guards in the castle attack us?"
Peter sighed sharply. "If that should happen—and pray it doesn't—then you, Jaxx, will make it your first priority to get that gate open. The rest of us will fight the guards, protecting you until the army comes through. Then we fight!"
"And if the guards don't attack us?"
"Then we take the element of surprise. Caspian and Susan will see to Miraz, Prunaprismia, and the new heir. Then the rest of us will kill the guards and the castle will be ours."
I was impressed at Peter's smooth ability to plan these things. He was a natural. But then again, he had had a lot of experience.
I nodded. "That sounds good."
Finally, Peter looked at me in the eye. Buried there, underneath the icy exterior, there was pain, determination and hope. He looked away before I could uncover more about his strange persona, but I was not going to give up that easily.
Once Peter had dismissed the council, I took him aside. We stood near the carving of the Great Aslan.
"If you want to talk about what happened last night, you might as well save your breath," said Peter immediately.
I shook my head. "I just want answers. What went on there, in the clearing, today? Caspian acted as if he knew me."
"He recognized your behaviour," Peter replied, then snapped his mouth shut.
I had a suspicion he shouldn't have said that, so I pounced. "But how could he? He doesn't know me." I looked right into Peter's eyes. "No one does."
Peter looked away from me; left, then right.
Without thinking, I took his hand. "You're hiding something from me," I said softly. "I think you know you can trust me."
"Of course I trust you," said Peter. He covered my hand with his other. "It's just…complicated."
"Peter, you kissed me!" I said in a loud whisper, hoping my voice wouldn't carry. "You can't get away with saying 'It's just complicated'! I mean, I'm sure it is, but you've pulled me in, and I want to know what's going on!"
Peter looked more uncomfortable than I'd ever seen him. He dropped my hand and stuck his hands in his pockets. "I told you to forget about that."
"For God's sake! Do you really think I'll be able to forget it that easily? I mean, goddamnit, Peter, really?"
The young king shrugged.
I sighed.
We stood there looking all around us, everywhere but at each-other, for a minute.
"I was trying," said Peter suddenly, "to show you something, but it didn't work. It just…I just got out of hand."
Forgetting that there were people about, I put my hand on his face. "Peter."
He took my hand from his face and started leading me out of the How. When we passed Susan and Edmund, Peter let go of my hand. I followed him out the stone door.
Once we were outside, he took my hand again and pulled me towards the small barn that stabled Peter's and Caspian's horses. Two curious heads appeared over the half doors when we entered, their ears pricked up. When they saw it was only us, they went back into their stalls.
Neither of us spoke as I sat on a haystack and Peter tacked up his horse. I watched him as he tightened the girth and murmured softly to the horse while he eased the halter over its face.
Peter swung easily into the saddle, and then offered me his hand. Using the stirrup and his arm, I pulled myself up behind him. I had ridden a horse before, numerous times, but never with someone else.
I wrapped my arms around his torso as he clicked to the bay gelding and we cantered from the barn. Once we were a safe distance from the How and had made sure no one had followed us, Peter eased the horse into a gallop.
The impact of the animal's strong hocks jarred me from my sort of misty stupor, and I found myself clutching to Peter to dear life. I let my head rest on his back, in between his shoulder blades, and I was stunned at how loose and relaxed his muscles were despite his normally stiff manner.
We rode in silence for some time before Peter finally slowed the horse to a trot. It was getting dark now, and we were entering a lush cove with lovely wildflowers growing hither and thither.
Peter drew the horse to a stop and leapt from the saddle. He dutifully helped me down; I placed my hands on his shoulders as he lifted me by the waist. My feet touched the ground, but I still felt like I was floating.
"Now," said Peter quietly, even though we were clearly alone. "I'm going to say some things, and then I'm going to tell you what to say in response. Wherever I go, you go, unless I tell you otherwise. Alright?" His blue eyes shone brightly in the dusk as a small smile played at his lips.
I smiled. "Alright."
We began walking slowly, side by side, through the little meadow.
"I've never shown anyone this place before," he said softly. "I guess I was saving it for just the right person. Now say 'I don't think you have the right person'."
"I don't think you have the right person," I repeated, looking at my feet as we walked.
"Don't be stupid," he said, taking my hand. "If I didn't have the right person we wouldn't be here. Now you look away, to the left."
I did.
He pulled me by the hand to the end of the meadow. We climbed a small ascent with Weeping Willow tree leaves hanging down all around us. At the top, the vegetation gave way to a spectacular sight. We were standing on top of a cliff that overlooked what appeared to be all of Narnia. A large river was rushing below us; it wound around the mountains and ran in the valleys and went on for miles. Misty clouds were hovering around the mountains, and they were turned a stunning shade of gold by the sun setting before our very eyes. Its rays streamed through the clouds in a dream like, heavenly manner. The whole world was quiet, as if Peter and I were the only beings on earth.
Peter was looking at my face, clearly admiring the awe that must have been splattered all over my features.
"It's…it's…" I couldn't find the right word.
"Special," he said for me. "Just like you."
I looked at him, blinking in surprise, the corners of my mouth tingling with the desire to smile very widely.
He had let go of my hand; he led me to a fallen log that we sat on. I was still taking in the fabulous view.
"Say, 'Are you really going to lead that army to Beruna tomorrow?'"
I said that.
"Yes," he replied. "I have to. It was Aslan's last wish for me. We need to save Narnia. Now say, 'You're very brave, you know'."
"You're very brave, you know." I looked at him so he would know just how much I really meant that.
He chuckled. "I try."
He took my hand and then pressed his palm to mine. His fingers stuck out about an inch higher than mine, and his palm was quite a bit wider. He did the same with my other hand.
"You're hands are so small," he said. He looked me in the eye. "Say, 'They're mine'."
"They're mine," I said softly. My stomach was fluttering now that he was touching me.
He closed his fingers around mine and he touched them to his lips. "They're mine now." His eyes never left mine. "Say, 'You can have them'."
I knew the confusion showed in my eyes, but I murmured, "You can have them."
"Now say, 'You can have anything as long as I can stay here forever with you'."
"You can have anything as long as I can stay here forever…with you."
"Now kiss me."
My heart skipped a few beats. "What?"
"Please."
I bit my lip. "Peter…"
"Please."
I took a deep breath, trying to keep my breathing under control. My heart pounded angrily in my rib cage. Slowly, I leaned forward. He just kept gazing into my eyes, the golden light reflecting in his eyes in an ethereal way. My eyelids fluttered shut as I softly, gently, brushed his lips with my own. I pulled back only far enough to look directly into his eyes again.
"I love you," he said in barely a whisper.
Suddenly pain exploded in the center of my forehead and I cried out. I flew apart from Peter and fell off the log, writhed on the ground. I clutched my head as images flashed before my eyes: Peter, Edmund, Susan and Lucy, Aslan, the great lion, Jadis, the white witch—millions of scenes I didn't recognize but knew I'd seen before flickered before my eyes. I saw Peter's eyes many times: in different places, with different expressions. I saw the scene that had just happened, of him taking my hands, of my kissing him, only we were wearing different clothes, my hair was shorter and loose, we both looked younger, and it was real, he wasn't telling me what to say or do…it was at the same time of day, the same lighting, the same mood. I was overwhelmed with these pictures. I saw war. I saw violence. I saw blood and people screaming. I saw Jadis thrusting the end of her shattered wand into Edmund's side, I saw Susan screaming as a wolf jumped at her and Lucy, I saw the same wolf's jaws right above my face, and then Peter—Peter—screaming my name and sprinting over to me. I saw his face, it was wet with tears, and I was kissing him again, but it was daylight outside, we were standing on a hill in the dawn and he was crying. I saw Peter battling strange creatures and I saw Jadis advancing towards him. I saw red, and felt the rage, and then I was looking at the ground, and then there was pain, screaming, and—
Blackness.
