Black And Blue

AllzStar

When I woke up the whole atmosphere of the How seemed tense.

I was curled up next to Peter. His arms were still locked tight around me, and I could hear his soft breathing in my ear. I smiled happily and I snuggled in closer to him, breathing in his scent. After a moment I realized I could not be able to sleep again, so, careful not to wake Peter, I got up from the cot.

I folded the towel over the back of a chair and pulled on my undershirt. My breeches were wrinkled from having been slept in so I pulled them off and tugged my blue dress over my head. I paused to pick up my scabbard, secured it around my hips, and sheathed Gemma before leaving mine and Peter's room.

The How could only house so many people; Lucy and Susan shared a room, and Edmund had opted to bunk with Caspian so that the two older boys wouldn't kill each-other. But I knew Edmund better than that—it was an excuse for Peter and me to share a room.

At the stone table and in the chambers beyond, the few people who were awake said nothing to each-other as they got themselves into battle mode. As soon as the sun began to set this evening we were setting off to raid Miraz's castle.

Outside the sun had not yet risen; the sky was a pale blue and the earth seemed very quiet. I breathed in the smell of the grass and the dawn. It was hard to believe this time tomorrow we could be housing in a great castle…or be torn to shreds.

I followed the path that the centaurs had marked to a small pond in the woods behind the How. There was a little pool of clear blue water, with a little waterfall that splashed merrily into it. I was surprised to see Caspian sitting on the bank, drinking from his hipflask.

"Caspian?" I called.

He turned around quickly, his hand on his sword. When he saw it was just me he relaxed. "Good morning, Lady Carmen."

"You can call me Jaxx," I said, sitting down beside him.

"Forgive me," he apologized, "Jaxx."

I gazed at the waterfall thoughtfully. "Are you scared?"

"Yes." He looked down, as if he were ashamed.

I looked over at him. "It's good that you're afraid," I murmured. "You'd be a fool if you weren't. People who are too confident tend to get careless. Just look at Peter." I smiled, realizing how true that was.

He laughed nervously. "It's just that I think this plan is crazy. Nobody has ever taken that castle. One of the most powerful armies in all of Narnia has tried and failed. I do not see why we must do this tonight."

"I know what you mean," I sighed, leaning back on my hands. "But if you think about it, if we don't act first, they will. And there's no telling what will happen then."

"At least we will be here, under the magic of Aslan," Caspian pointed out. "Do not get angry with me for saying this, but I think your King is a fool."

I tried not to let the spark of anger show on my face. I knew Caspian was having trouble fitting in here, and his and Peter's personalities definitely clashed. "He can be foolish sometimes," I said. "But his heart is in the right place. He's planned battles before. I'm sure he knows what he is doing."

"Isn't it you who is captain of the army?" he asked.

I nodded. "Peter believes I'm in no condition to lead an army, and he's right. There are still little bits of memory just coming back to me."

Caspian was looking hard at me, but I kept my gaze at the pond. "You really trust him, don't you?"

I nodded again. "I love him."

"I realized that." There was sort of an awkward pause as he looked away and put his elbows on his knees. "How long have you known these Kings and Queens of Old?"

"A year and a half," I answered.

"You are good friends with them, yes?"

"Of course. Edmund is my best friend."

"Hm." He raised an eyebrow. "Not the oldest girl? Susan?"

"Well, yes, we get along, but…." I stopped when I realized that he'd been trying to bring up Susan all along. My lips curled into a smirk as I slowly turned my gaze to meet his. "What about Susan?"

His eyes widened and he quickly looked away. His olive-toned face quickly turned red. "It was nothing. I just thought you two were close."

"We are." I decided to spare him the embarrassment and let the subject go by changing it. "So what's going on between you and Miraz? What's the relationship there?"

"My father was King before he died," Caspian explained. "The throne is rightfully mine, but my uncle Miraz seems to think otherwise. Now that my aunt has given birth to a son, Miraz has an heir. His first priority is to do away with me so he may take over the throne."

"That's horrible," I offered, patting his shoulder. "That must be hard for you."

"I do not need sympathy," he said, gently shrugging me off. "I just want to honour my father by taking his place. I want to bring peace to Narnia once again."

I opened my mouth to say something but back at the How a horn blared loudly. "Wake up call," I said, standing up. "We'd better move."

Caspian and I trotted back down the path and into the How in silence. Inside everyone was very much awake, but the only talking was done in whispers. I climbed up the dais and joined Peter at the stone table. Taking his hand, I leaned over to talk to him.

"How are you doing?"

He didn't answer. He turned to face me and touched my face with his hand before turning to the crowd. "You have till dusk to prepare," he announced, his face holding no strictness for once. "Use your time wisely, for we will not wait for stragglers. Break."

Everyone went about their own business. There was barely a sound as the chamber quickly emptied. I watched Peter as he bent over the strategy table, studying the battle plans for the millionth time. "There's been a change of plans," he muttered without looking at me. "You're to stay with Edmund at all times."

My face fell. "Peter—"

"That's final." He stood up to his full height and looked down at me, his face hard but his eyes tired. "I don't want anything happening to you."

"So you'd put your sister and Caspian in danger, but not me?" I demanded, feeling my face heating up.

"Caspian can handle himself," Peter spat. "And Susan will stick with me. If I could leave her here too, I would, but she's too valuable an archer to be left behind." He ran a hand through his messy, ash blond hair. "Don't you see? I will do everything in my power to keep you and my siblings safe."

"I don't know why you insist on making me feel so useless," I snapped, taking a step back from him. "I was named the Lady Knight of Narnia by Aslan himself! I can handle a battle just as well as you can."

Peter tried to take my face in his hands but I jerked away from his touch. "I can't lose you again!" he cried. Anger flared up in his eyes. "You don't know how much you mean to me."

"As much as you do to me!" I yelled. My eyes burned with tears but I blinked them back furiously. "How do you think I feel about you risking your life in this thing? What if I was running this army—the way I should be, need I remind you—and I made you stay away from the battle itself?"

"I can take orders," Peter replied hotly.

I barred my teeth at the absurdity of that statement. I started shouting, "No you cannot Peter Pevensie. You always have to be in charge—"

"Carmen, please—"

"—because that's where you feel safe. All alone and independent, because you feel safe that way—"

"If you would just listen—"

"—you just can't stand the idea of not being number one for once in your life—!"

"I'm not strong enough!" Peter screamed, taking me by the upper arms and giving me a shake. "I can't watch you get hurt again, don't you see?!" My mouth was slightly ajar as I watched him break down before my eyes. He sagged a little, clutching my arms as he let his head hang down. His back shook as dry sobs racked through his body."You don't know how much it destroyed me to see you in such pain. To know that you had forgotten me. I…I'm not strong enough…to see that happen again."

I was utterly speechless, frozen solid, stiff as a board. I just stood there with my arms bound to my sides as Peter cried. A movement caught my eye and I looked over Peter's quivering shoulder at Edmund, who had just come out of his room carrying an armful of chainmail. The look on his face suggested that he had just heard that entire argument. His eyes were wide, his eyebrows arched up as he gazed sadly at me. He tilted his head towards the door and tried to smile before heading out.

I stepped out of Peter's grasp. He bent across the strategy table, his strangled sobs still echoing slightly around the chamber. I reached out to touch his back but found I couldn't. Suddenly my eyes flooded and my vision blurred. I turned and ran from the How, out the door, and up the stone ramp. Edmund was bent over a pile of chainmail and armour but stood up when I approached him. He took me in his arms as if I were his little sister, as if I were Lucy, squeezing me as if he were trying to squeeze all the bad things out. I cried into his chest without restraint, just letting all the tears of frustration, exhaustion and hurt stain his shirt front. And he let me, gently stroking my hair and rubbing my back. I felt his cheek rest against the top of my head as the last of my tears was shed and I stood breathing heavily, my face sticky and tear-stained. We stood together for quite some time after that, even though I was through crying.

I was suddenly overwhelmed with gratitude for Edmund. The boy was always there for me, he understood me perfectly, and he never let me down. I didn't know what I would do without him. I was then that I realized that he meant as much to me as Peter did.

Suddenly two more sets of arms wrapped around me from behind, and I found myself giggling as I was smothered in between the three younger Pevensies. When we all pulled apart every one of us was beaming from ear-to-ear.

Susan looked at me with sympathy in her ice blue eyes. "He's like that sometimes."

"Oh, it's alright," I said, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. I appreciated Susan's understanding and was impressed at how she'd known right away what the problem was. "I'm just tired, that's all."

Lucy hugged me again. "Are you and Peter all right?"

"Yes, of course," I replied, patting her head. "We're both just…tired." I met Edmund's gaze and could tell he was trying to tell me something without speaking.

Caspian came to join us, then. "Lady Carmen," he said after bearing everyone good morning. "I would appreciate your assistance in the training arena." He paused and looked at Susan. "And perhaps Lady Susan could help the archers prepare, as well?"

A small smile curled Susan's lip. "Of course."

I grinned when I saw them looking at each-other for longer than was necessary.

Lucy tugged on my sleeve. "Would it be alright if I went to talk to Peter?"

I nodded and she took off into the How.

Edmund and I followed Susan and Caspian to the training arena. Well, it wasn't really an arena—more like a circle of stones set in the middle of the large green field when the recruits were preparing for the battle tonight. Most of the army was there already; others were bringing out armour and weapons from the armoury. Two minotaurs were sparring at one end and armour was being fitted on the other. Just outside the circle of stone there were ten targets that archers were trying in vain to hit. Susan and Caspian headed over there, leaving Edmund and I to deal with the knights.

It was a long day. I was exhausted and didn't know how I was going to handle a raid on top of everything else, but since Peter was making me stay in the watch towers with Edmund I wouldn't need too much strength anyway. I didn't see Peter until it was nearly time to go, and even then he didn't so much as cast a glance in my direction. But I wasn't going to let a cold shoulder fell me. I knew Peter was just stressed about the battle and he would be back to his good self afterwards.

He gave a pep talk that lasted a good ten minutes before finally signalling for everyone to standby for orders. The air was instantly tense and anxious: friends were dutifully shaking hands and husbands were hugging and kissing their wives. Most of the women had opted to stay behind and prepare the How for the returning recruits, including Lucy.

As Peter had instructed me, I stayed at Edmund's side. The griffons we were to ride on to the castle were being groomed and tacked by three centaur ladies. Peter, Susan, Edmund, Caspian and I were to fly on them and enter the castle from above. I was a little anxious about that feat: it's not everyday one gets to fly a griffon three thousand feet above the ground.

"Are you scared?" Edmund suddenly asked, repeating the question I had asked Caspian that morning.

I sighed. "I'm scared for my people. I'm not so much worried about myself. Listen," I added, placing my hand on his arm, "if anything goes wrong…." He nodded, understanding, and I was glad because I felt more tears coming on. But I needed to say this. "You're my best mate, Ed. You know that, right?"

He nodded again and covered my hand with his own. "Of course. And you mine. Are you with me?"

"To the death."

We grinned at each-other before I heard Peter's loud, clear voice echo across the landscape. "TIME TO MOVE OUT!" he called.

Smiling at Edmund one last time, we ran for our griffon. Edmund swung himself up with ease and offered me his hand. I took it and he pulled me up behind him. We waited for Peter's yell of "FOR NARNIA!" before taking to the skies.

Well that was their first fight as a couple…hopefully everything will sort itself out in the end!!

I'm stoked about the next chapter, guys. But I miss my reviewers! Where did you all go! There was only two reviews for the last chapter!

Please review, it make me happy.

Also, Imma start replying to some of your reviews here, since most of them have good questions in them that I think everyone wants to know:

Sakuraangel1327: When I say I'm rewriting it, I mean that I'll fix the spelling mistakes and stuff, and also the order of some events and the dialogue. I watched the movie and realized that most of the dialogue in my story was totally off, and I'd messed up the timeline for some things, so I'll change that as well as the chapter titles (cuz they suck) and fill in the chapters a little bit.

Cammie: Thankies for the review^^ And I don't know if there will be any hardcore Suspian; since the story is always narrative by Peter or Jaxx, it will be hard to go beyond little flirtatious things and the kiss at the end. Or I'll have Jaxx catch them in the act, or something. I don't know.

All the pretty horses: Yes I agree: it is a much overlooked combination! When I named the story Black and Blue I realized I might as well make it a reference to Peter's and Jaxx's eyes, and since Peter's are already blue Jaxx's will have to be black. And most OC's have really remarkable eyes, like some ridiculous color, so I tried to make Jaxx a bit plainer. But I've always pictured her blonde, so…

Josephineb: Yes, Jaxx is not a common name, not even now. Please note that it is, in fact, merely a nickname evolved from her last name, Jackson (her father is American) and that her real name is Carmen. :-)

I hope that answers your questions….

OH and I might be setting up a YouTube account and making little previews for my stories…stay tuned for updates on that!

Loves,

AllzStar