Disclaimer: Just to keep it simple: A. I don't own Power Rangers. B. I just make fun of them; so don't get upset if I mock your favorite. C. Please review. I don't mind constructive criticism. D. Thanks to Writer's Guide to the Universe and Power Rangers Central for providing a lot of the information that I need.
If you haven't done so, please read the first hundred and fifty stories in "When Rangers Meet," "More of When Rangers Meet," and "Headquarters Where Rangers Meet."
This is story number twenty-four.
Taylor and Conner
by
Eileen (Psycho Tangerine)
Taylor sighed as she flicked a switch. She had to remind herself for what seemed to be the millionth time that day that she had been very lucky to get this job. Just because she had been caught on several occasions talking to her jet as if it were alive, she had been given a dishonorable discharge from the Air force. Of course, there had also been the strafing run she had done over that idiot Max's house...and the one over that two timer Eric's house as well.
So now here she was flying private planes for anyone who could hire her...anyone. Taylor gritted her teeth as she felt a wadded up ball of paper hit the back of her head. She tried to ignore it by watching the clouds. The nice clouds, the pretty, fluffy clouds, the calming...whump! A soccer ball slammed into the back of her head.
"Are we almost there yet?" whined Conner from his seat a few feet behind her. He had only recently come into a lot of money. Who knew he could make so much by charging five thousand a head for his soccer camp? So many parents were just that desperate to get their kids out of the house for two weeks. Of course, he paid Ethan well to hide the costs. May as well let future Rangers think that he actually spent all his time helping underprivileged kids.
"We just left the airport five minutes ago." said Taylor. "It takes three hours to fly to Florida."
"You forgot to say 'sir'."
"What?"
Conner grinned. "You work for me. So you gotta call me 'sir'."
Taylor gritted her teeth again. Why oh why did she have to incur such big debts? But she just had to have her house renovated to look like the Animarium. And she had been so sure Eric was going to propose that she spent thousands of dollars renting a hall, buying a wedding dress and everything else needed for a wedding. What she hadn't known was that while she was doing all that, Eric was making plans to sneak into the future to be with his true love. Taylor had shown up at his door in her wedding dress to see Wes sobbing and cursing about backstabbing best friends.
"Well?" asked Conner.
"Well, what?" retorted Taylor as she imagined one of the pretty clouds to be a hammer for her annoying passenger's head.
"That's well what, 'Sir,'" explained Conner. "That or I won't pay the fee when we get there."
"Fine, well what, sir," growled Taylor. She should never have made the policy...fly first, pay later. That's what she got for hiring Cole to 'read' people's hearts to make sure they did so.
"Much better," said Conner as he sat back in his seat. The flight wasn't too bad considering how grumpy the pilot was. He just wasn't used to flying. Of course, he would've been if he had gotten the Hovercraft Cycle. He scowled to himself. Since when did the Blue Ranger get the special stuff? He was Red Ranger, he should've gotten it. But, never mind, he was getting pretty comfortable. There was only one thing missing.
"Hey!" Conner shouted as he bounced yet another soccer ball off Taylor's head. "Where's the stewardess? I'm getting thirsty!"
"There is no stewardess," sighed Taylor. "This is a private plane...Sir," she ground out.
"I'll pay triple."
Taylor threw the plane into auto pilot and jumped up. She ran into the plane's bathroom the popped out in a stereotypical stewardess outfit, that included a skirt. "Coffee, tea, or milk, Sir?" she asked with a sickly sweet smile.
"How about you just move all that cellulite and fetch me a Coke, Babe?" said Conner as he slapped her on the butt.
"Coming right up, Sir!" replied Taylor with the same sweet smile pasted on her face. She sauntered to the rear of the plane.
"Ah, so good to get real service here," commented Conner as he laid back again and closed his eyes. He couldn't wait to get to Florida. Ever since Dr. O's old girlfriend had come to visit...Conner just couldn't forget the sultry glances she kept giving him. Dumb old Ethan kept insisting they were glares. And wasn't it super of Dr. O to go to Florida with Kim so he could make his final break with her? The fact that he hadn't come back yet didn't faze Conner one bit. Dr. O was probably just helping her find soccer themed furniture for their future love nest.
Speaking of helping... "Say, where's my Coke?"
"Coming!" Taylor sauntered up to Conner. "Here you go, Sir." She slammed the full bottle of Coke hard into his lap. Then she poured the contents of the bottle over Conner's head as he groaned in pain. "Jerk!" she snapped. She then stomped back to the pilot's chair, disengaged the autopilot and pulled a lever to veer away from the mountain they were heading into.
"If you wanted to get kinky, you should've just said so," mumbled Conner as he sucked soda from his drenched shirt.
Taylor ignored him and concentrated on her flying as best she could. Yes, that cloud did look like a pretty butterfly. And that one looked like a ducky. And that one like a knife for her passenger's throat.
"Hey!" Where's the in-flight movie?"
Taylor groaned. With insurance costs and the money she had wasted on a wedding that never happened, she just hadn't been able to afford a dvd player or television for her plane.
"I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want a movie! I want..."
Taylor clenched the controls and counted to ten. "Do you see a television or a screen here, you moron?"
"But, I'm soooo boooored," whined Conner. "Entertain me!"
"So, you're bored," growled Taylor as she flicked on the auto pilot again. "Well then," she continued with another phony smile as she turned around to face Conner. "Let me entertain you!" She ducked down so he couldn't see her.
"What are you...eww!" gagged Conner. "What's that awful stench!"
Taylor popped back up...with her socks on her hands. She had drawn faces on both of them with a marker. She placed both 'puppets' on the top edge of her pilot's chair as if it were a stage. "Hello!" she made one puppet say. "I am Mr. Annoying Pain in the Ass. I know you are busy flying a plane, but I want you to play with me!"
"Oh, yeah?" replied the other puppet. "Play with this, soccer brains!" She then had her 'Taylor' puppet beat up her 'Conner' puppet.
Conner gaped at this. "Whoa, Dude, you need serious help. Maybe you should see a ...MOUNTAIN!" he screamed.
But Taylor just ignored him as she was too engrossed in her fantasy beating. Conner ran to the copilot seat and began slamming on buttons at random.
"What do you think you're doing?" cried Taylor who finally noticed as the auto pilot veered them away from the mountain. "No! Don't touch that...eeeeeeeyyyaaaaahhhhh!" she cried as Conner hit the pilot's eject button causing the roof to open and her to fly out seat and all.
"Cool!" called Conner as he watched Taylor deploy the attached parachute.
"Hmmm...forget about Florida," he decided as he grabbed the controls. "I'm going to get me some real hot babes. Tahiti, here I come!"
Over the next three hours reports came in from everywhere about some drunken pilot swerving in the sky. And three days later Conner was finally rescued from the tree into which he eventually crashed.
