CHAPTER II: To Free Your Innermost Self

He twisted his hand around to gaze curiously towards his knuckles, dark blue orbs rounded in wide inquiry as though the outstretched digits spoke of wonderment. Ventus flexed his fingers, they seemed to work pleasantly with each bend, he was still whole despite the colorful swirling void surrounding him. He was standing alone upon a platform, and engraved below was the image of a boy curled into his own body, his eyes shut tightly in permanent slumber. Though his hair hadn't any pitch, instead replaced with chestnut, the resemblance to Vanitas was uncanny. It was overly suspicious as well as conflicting, for Ventus could work up no courage in which to despise the familiar face sleeping peacefully below him. Instead, looking towards the still picture stretched across the platform, all he felt was warmth.

This is your heart.

Ventus felt eerily safe here, and he didn't have very many intentions of leaving anytime soon. However, the scuff of boots against the platform brought him uncomfortable knowledge that he was not alone in this realm of peace. It took awhile of searching in circles before the one responsible for the sound materialized from a whirl of darkness, piercing yellow eyes greeted him with a begrudging scowl. Ventus reacted instantly, he dismissed the tranquility to the environment and extended his arm to summon his Keyblade. Where his fingers went to close around the hilt of his beloved weapon, they shut on air instead. He shot a look of surprise towards his empty grip, perplexed by the lack of enchantment coming to his aide.

Vanitas snorted and waved away his hand, rolling his eyes in clear annoyance. "Don't even bother," he deadpanned. "This is a serenity of peace. Meaning, as much as I'd absolutely love a do-over of our fight, it's not gonna happen while we're here."

Ventus ignored his jabs and instead focused harder on bringing his Keyblade from a source of light, was it not part of his heart? Not even a spark greeted him upon command, Vanitas stood patiently on the side with his wrists crossed behind his back, his eyes gazed boredly towards his other half as silence stretched across them. Soon, Ventus realized he was being quite embarrassing towards himself and gave up on the prospect of gaining control of his supposedly loyal weapon, instead turning a scowl towards the dark enigma. "Fine," he relented begrudgingly. "Do you know where we are? Is this still my head?"

Vanitas flicked observatory eyes towards the colorful atmosphere surrounding them both and absently shook his head. "If we were," he explained in a condescending tone, "then we'd be able to summon our Keyblades. We're in the heart."

"My heart?" Ventus wondered aloud, although it was only meant to be a thought. His eyes flicked down towards the boy etched against the floor as a hand rose up to press against his chest. If this was his own heart, then why was he trapped here? Certainly, he would be able to escape his own body through sheer will, yet there didn't appear to be any exits showing him a way out. He needed to find a way to reach his friends again, however, Terra and Aqua needed him most of all and he couldn't afford to be stuck here with his evil other side like this. Were they still alive? What had happened at the Keyblade Graveyard, after Vanitas had forced him to fight?

Speaking of which, the other boy had started cackling in obnoxious laughter at the way Ventus was desperately searching the area. "I'm sorry," Vanitas said in a manner that made the apology seem uselessly invalid. "It's just, you look like you really think you're getting out of here. It's been over ten years Veni, or wait... Not for you, right? You think it's been less than a few hours at most."

Ventus had snapped his gaze towards Vanitas in a show of evident disbelief. Ten years?! That was impossible, how could so much time slip through his fingers without his knowledge? "You're a liar!" Ventus immediately accused with angry fists clenched fiercely at his sides. "You expect me to believe I've been here for ten years and hadn't noticed? What are you even doing here, I destroyed you. You're supposed to be dead!"

Vanitas snorted at this as though amused by the declaration. "You can conquer your darkness," he reasoned in an infuriatingly calm voice. "But you can't kill it. And I'm not lying. Outside of your body, wherever you happen to be, you've been asleep for ten straight years. No aging, no speaking, just sleeping. You may have won the battle but it came with a price. Imagine three hours here. Every three hours is another ten years you've been sleeping. Pretty cool, huh?"

Ventus panicked immediately, because what if Vanitas was telling the truth?! What if ten years had truly gone by and he'd been here, sleeping, abandoning Terra and Aqua while he was trapped in his own heart. He felt robbed of his own life, outraged that so much time had passed and he never learned what became of his dear comrades. This was all his fault. If Vanitas hadn't forced him into battle in the first place, he would've never fallen prey to this eternal slumber. With a cry, he threw himself forward and attacked the yellow eyed miscreant. It didn't matter if he had his Keyblade or not, he'd kill Vanitas with his bare hands over and over again for as long as they lived there.

However, their bodies never collided. Instead, as he flung himself, he ended up hurling into an invisible wall that knocked him backwards on his back. Sitting up, he shook the ache away from his hand and glowered up at a bored looking Vanitas staring blankly towards the blanket of ebony up above. "I told you," he stated blandly. "This is a serenity of peace. No violence. You're stuck here until the world ends and there's nothing you can do about it."

Ventus shoved himself up on his feet, his chest rising and falling with each harsh breath he took. "You're stuck here too!" He pointed out, shouting uncontrollably. "So just shut your mouth!"

Vanitas's lips twitched briefly, he spun with expertise grace and started towards the edge of the tall platform, his wrists still quietly crossed behind him. "This isn't your heart," he said softly, and Ventus sent him a look of question. Vanitas stayed silent for a very suspenseful time until Ventus thought he was going to shatter, then he turned around again. "I don't know who this heart belongs to, but it's definitely not yours. We're not getting out of here without their say so, and something tells me they don't even realize that we exist. So I'd suggest you get comfortable, time moves especially slow here."

Of course it did. Ventus knew he wasn't ever going to be able to sit still for the rest of his life, he needed to find out what became of his beloved friends, why hadn't they come back for him? Perhaps they did, perhaps they just didn't have a way of bringing him back. Perhaps they never would. Gripped with agonizing despair, Ventus lifted up his eyes and put his deepest hopes into Terra and Aqua. But most of all, he put his strength into whoever this heart belonged to and willed them to always do the right thing.

•¶•

Kairi had made so much progress over the time that passed, the determined spark to be as reliable a fighter as her friends made her that much fiercer to gaze upon. Sora thought she was a different person entirely, a girl very different from the one he was sure he loved as he chased her on the beach. It seemed such a long while ago that Sora had willingly sacrificed himself so that she would live onward, how she hadn't been alright with giving him up that easily and recognized him even through his haze in darkness.

But they had just been children.

Lea didn't look up from his book but he still managed to sound accusatory as he turned another page. "Easy there slugger," he stated absently. "One of these days, she's gonna catch you gawking at her and you're gonna have to do that embarrassing stutter that you do whenever you talk to her."

Sora flushed and sent a look of bewilderment towards the spiky haired boy, too absorbed in his studies to acknowledge him. Lea, Sora, and Kairi all spent a few hours of the day together in the library searching the missused books for the purpose of locating a certain answer which they sought. Lea and the other former Nobodies had been set free of their chains to the darkness, yet Roxas had never appeared as himself. Ansem's reports had left them without answers, leaving the adolescents alone to folly over texts that held little marvel towards them regarding their search. Kairi had been optimistic about lending a hand the first time Sora had asked her, but now he recognized the bored slouch in her posture as she reached up to retrieve yet another book from a shelf.

This obsessive research was beginning to seem so futile, and Sora wasn't sure on how to properly reach the boy within him to ask of his own prior knowledge. Naminé would've been of grand assistance as well, but Kairi stated the petite blonde was being suspiciously tight lipped over the matter. They all knew that both Naminé and Roxas were special case Nobodies, and perhaps that was why they weren't standing here with the rest of them. Sora simply didn't have the heart to tell Lea that perhaps it was for the best.

"I wasn't gawking," Sora defended himself with a flash of his bright eyes. "I was just...observing. And can you keep your voice down?"

Lea did look up from his written text at this and glanced sideways at his companion, the glimmer of a smirk touched his lips. Before he could say anything more to tease him, a heavy object landed across from the duo and both gazes lifted to meet the grim expression written over Kairi's face. "I found something," she said quietly, and Sora immediately recognized the deep note of guilt in her voice. "Actually, I found something awhile ago. I-I just didn't say anything because I was hoping to find a better answer! But, it's been awhile and..." Without looking at them, she turned the book to face the boys and pushed it shyly towards them.

Both Sora and Lea bent forward to read the paragraph her slim finger tapped against, their eyes moved over the scribbled writing with swift excitement. 'A person made up of two physical halves is indeed a rarity, and to only one must be dominant lest they both collapse. To set free your innermost self would be to fall into the darkness, plunge forever into nothingness, and soon lose sight of morality.'

Sora grimaced and lifted his gaze up to share an intense look with Kairi, both of them knew what that meant for them. To give Roxas and Naminé the freedom they deserved was to willingly unlock the blackest parts of their hearts and risk total self destruction to who they were today. Sora thought of the only other time he'd ever done such a thing, it had been the only way to give Kairi and the other Princesses of Heart their lives back. That dark void he'd floated in, the murky waters of consuming thoughtlessness, the slowly processing loss of his memory, it had been a wonder Kairi was able to pull him out the way she had. He could never wish anything like that upon his beloved friend, she'd sacrificed so much already.

Lea glanced between the two with an unreadable sharpness about him, Sora didn't like when he couldn't decipher something in a person. Kairi scratched the back of her neck and straightened, her nose scrunching thoughtfully. "Hey, don't look so down guys," she insisted with one of her soft smiles. "Everyone figured the Nobodies were doomed to the darkness forever too, but just look! You all got your hearts back, and that's what's most important. We've always been able to do the impossible, right?"

Sora couldn't restrain a grin. He and Kairi had always been known as the dynamic duo of undefeatable happiness, it was so like her to make forth the attempt of lifting everyone from their woes. After Riku and the King had officially disappeared into the Realm of Darkness, it had been Kairi that grabbed his hand and filtered firm belief through his veins that they'd come back safe and alive.

Lea looked away from her, studying the book she'd placed in front of him, and muttered a quiet "right" under his breath.

It was then that the doors suddenly burst open, the trio shifted attention to the newcomers as they came stumbling in to disrupt the setting. An instantly recognizable avian and canine collapsed together on the floor, the white duck made an obnoxious sound of displeasure and flipped over to thwack his less intelligent comrade until he got the memo and retreated backwards. At the sight of them, Sora's eyes instantly lit up and he scrambled to get out of his chair and greet them happily.

"Donald! Goofy!" He called out to them, rushing over and helping them both up on their feet. "What're you guys doing here? I thought you'd both be with the Queen until Mickey came back." Over his shoulder, Kairi and Lea both exchanged a look of complication.

Goofy scratched momentarily at his scalp, like it would take him a second to remember what exactly he was doing there in the first place. "That's what we thought too," he prompted, then snapped his fingers when a realization dawned upon him. "We've been lookin' everywhere in the tower for ya! The King left us clear instructions after he left."

"Instructions?" Sora wondered, leaning forward for further information.

"Yup!" Donald spoke up from below, clearly still annoyed about having to look up and down the tower and then be knocked into the ground when he finally managed it. "Merlin and the Fairy Godmother are over at the Disney Castle now, they're lending their magic to keep a protective orb of impenetrable light around it so that Minnie is safe. So long as she doesn't leave the castle, nothing can touch her. But they can only keep it up for so long."

Sora knew how physically draining it was to use magic like that, he could only imagine the type of toll it was taking on the enchanters to keep something like that constantly flowing. Donald went on, a serious note taking shape in his typically quarky voice. "It's about Xehanort, Mickey caught wind of him moving through the worlds and causing destruction to the people inhabiting them. He doesn't know what he's trying to do, but he left it up to us to stop anything especially horrible from happening."

"You know what that means, dontcha?" Goofy asked with one of his wide grins of excitement.

Of course he did, Sora knew better than anything what that meant. Adventure. Near death. And yet another battle that would insist they perhaps give up their very lives. Before he could respond, Kairi's quiet voice filtered from behind him, "Sora?" He turned to regard her as she crossed the room and closed the wide distance between them. "Are you going too?"

Sora was certain this was the exact opposite of everything Kairi was hoping for once they were reunited; yet again being left on the sidelines while her two dearest friends went on to fight the darkness. While perhaps being a Princess of Heart didn't matter much to Kairi, it didn't mean it wasn't a big deal to be one to the enemies. She was too precious to take out there into the face of danger where it'd be far too easy for Xehanort to snatch her up. "I have to," Sora said, with a pleading undertone that asked for her complete cooperation. "I can't put something like this on hold until Riku comes back. Er, you understand don't you?"

He reached out and grasped her soft hands with his own and pulled her in closer to him, dropping his voice so that only she could hear him. "I'm not leaving you behind again. Just let me worry about the larger stuff so that you don't get kidnapped for the third time." He smiled humorously and her lips twitched into the ghost of one to match. Still, there lied a twinkle of uncertainty in the depths of her pale blue eyes. "Seriously," Sora reassured her, "I know how hard you've been working. You're tough as nails Kairi, and we're in this together this time around."

This time, Kairi did smile and her grip around his hands tightened tremendously. He very much did want her by his side during the battle about to ensue, both he and Riku knew just how powerful this little spitfire of a girl was. They were both proud to know her as their friend, she was certainly a force not to be reckoned with, but still valuable enough to be overwhelmed by the ones that wanted her most. Sora would do positively anything to keep her safe, he wasn't about to lose her again. Not while she was here, after how hard they'd all worked to be together again.

Donald cleared his throat in a loud, obvious manner and Sora blinked out of his haze; realizing they'd just been staring at each other. Blushing a bright hue of red, Sora stumbled backwards from Kairi and fumbled to find his voice again. "Um, I mean, right, okay! You guys keep up the awesome training, we'll be back soon absolutely!" He whirled around and glared at his animal companions as they snickered into their hands, quickly shushing them and hurrying them out the door.

"Bye Sora," Kairi waved to him, a sad but lingering smile touching her lips. He waved back to her just before the doors shut and cut them off from each other.

•¶•

It was cold here, damp and eerily quiet. A world made entirely of smooth black surface. Every now and then came the chatter of something unrecognizable, or the high whine of the biting wind. Riku and the mouse king took it all in with a sweep of their eyes, his eyes narrowed in determination, but unmistakable fear. So, this is the Realm of Darkness...