Disclaimer: Just to keep it simple: A. I don't own Power Rangers. B. I just make fun of them; so don't get upset if I mock your favorite. C. Please review. I don't mind constructive criticism. D. Thanks to Writers Guide to the Universe and Power Rangers Central for providing a lot of the information that I need.
If you haven't done so, please read the first hundred and fifty stories in "When Rangers Meet," "More of When Rangers Meet," and "Headquarters Where Rangers Meet."
This is story number forty-eight.
Clare and Dax
By
Eileen (Psycho Tangerine)
"Where is he?" Clare asked herself as she wandered the back lot of the studio. "This is such a strange place for a...oh, hello," she said to a life-sized figure of a werewolf. "You're a bit far from the Mystic Forest. Have you seen this guy around?" She held out a printed-out photo. She waited for a few seconds. "Well, if you don't know, just say so." Clare turned around and walked away in a huff. "Oh," she exclaimed as she bumped into a figure of an elf. "I didn't realize this San Angeles was such a popular vacation spot for the forest people. Hmmmm…" She squinted at the elf and compared it to the picture. "Is this a cousin of yours?" she asked him. "Do you know where he is?"
"Hey there!" called Dax as he ran into the lot. "Sorry I'm late, but I had to stop Rose and Ronny's tears before I left." He didn't tell Clare that they were tears of laughter when he had told them that he had gotten an actual date over the Internet.
"Oh," said Clare as she referred to the photo again. "You must be Dax. You look much taller in your picture."
"And you look much smarter in yours," returned Dax as he bounced excitedly towards her.
"What?" asked Clare. "Why does everyone think I'm stupid?"
"Oh, wait," Dax pulled out his 'Dating for Dummies' hand book. "Don't insult your date's intelligence…oops."
"That jerk, Xander, actually thought I'd be dumb enough to free a vampire!" Clare began to giggle nervously. "But I showed him. I showed them all!" The other Mystic Rangers had spent a week scraping the stinky fungus that had 'mysteriously' grown all over the Green Ranger.
"How nice," said Dax cautiously. Perhaps he had been a bit hasty in contacting this girl. But it wasn't as if he had gotten many offers for his ad on .com. It was either Clare or some woman who had a horn growing out of her forehead and a fetish for clowns.
"So, where are we going?" asked Clare. She was looking forward to seeing one of those human restaurants the Rangers were always talking about. Eating glop from a cauldron three times a day was getting a bit monotonous.
"Going?" asked Dax. "I thought we could just hang around here. I could show you all my stunt man films. Maybe we could even make our own film. I'll even splurge for the popcorn. It'll be fun." Soon, he would be the one kissing a girl in a movie not those snotty actors who were always laughing at him behind his back.
Clare stared at him with tears in her eyes. "Those liars!" she cried. "They told me I'd be going somewhere nice. That I'd need to wear new clothes. I hate this dress!" she said pulling at the green and yellow item Madison had picked out for her at Macy's. "I liked my old one. It took me two hundred and ten years to break it in just right."
Dax stared at her. Then he shook his head. So what if this one was a bit crazy? "Oh yeah, I guess we could go somewhere for dinner, but," he looked down indicating the old dirty blue jeans and t-shirt he was wearing, "darn it if I didn't forget to put on my good clothes today." He figured he'd put on his cooler 'movie' clothes after he convinced her to do it.
Clare smiled at him. "Is that all? I can fix that, no problem." She waved what looked like a magic wand at Dax. Two seconds later, he was wearing a matching yellow and green dress.
"What the…how'd you…hey! This isn't even my color!" blurted Dax indignantly.
"Cute, but hmmm…oh wait, that's right, Madison said the dresses were for the girls. Now, what should you wear?" Clare waved her wand again.
"That's more like it" said Dax in relief as he now stood in a nice pair of slacks and a blue button down shirt.
"Oh goody!" exclaimed Clare as she clapped her hands in glee. "Now we can go to one of those restaurants the others told me about. Maybe that McDonalds or Burger King that Chip's always talking about." She narrowed her eyes. "That wouldn't cost too much, would it?"
Crazy, stupid, and a witch of some kind…interesting combo thought Dax. But she'd still do for his movie. "Sure that sounds great," he replied. "But seeing as how we're both dressed up why don't we take some uhhh… moving pictures?" He pointed to the camera he had set up. "I've even got a special costume for you." He held out a Miratrix outfit he had gotten specially made. "Or maybe not," he finished lamely at Clare's confused look.
"Is that what people do on a date?" she asked. "Well, okay the. But I want one of those fancy Whoppers if I do."
"I guess my bank account can just about handle that," answered Dax. He turned on the video camera. "Now, if you'll just stand here," he guided Clare onto a large red X on the ground. "And I'll stand here." He stood in front of her.
"Uggghhh, those lights are blinding my eyes!" complained Clare.
"Maybe you should close them," suggested Dax.
Clare closed her eyes.
Finally, thought Dax. Now he could get the movie kiss he always dreamed of. For a second it occurred to him that this girl could have a big brother who worked out, a father who had a gun, or even an uncle who once served evil as a wolf knight. He shook his head at such silliness.
"Well?" asked Clare. "Now what? Am I supposed to say or do something?"
"No, just stand right there," replied Dax. He pulled breath spray out of his pocket and sprayed it into his mouth. Then he leaned into Clare, getting closer and closer until…he found himself alone in a giant diaper and baby bonnet. "Hey!" he cried in shock.
"I'm not as stupid as you think," growled Clare who was now standing by the video camera. "It's a good thing Madison told me all about how these things work." She waved her wand and photos of Dax in the diaper were sent to every email address in the United States. "Now no one will date you."
"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" cried Dax as he fell to the ground in tears.
Clare just flounced out of the back lot. But not before giving her phone number to that cute elf she had met earlier.
