Days pass by but they don't get a chance to talk properly. Sure they'd build up to it. Waverly would look at her with darker eyes that almost scared her with their intensity and her lips pressed together holding in words ready to be spoken. That would be the moment they'd interrupt. There was a long list of well intentioned offenders - Dolls, Doc, Nedley and an array of nurses and doctors, She didn't count Wynonna as well intentioned, her ability to enter the room at just the wrong moment was downright spectacular. As if she could sense something was going to happen and was performing the role of the protective big sister.
Maybe it was for the better, Nicole was exhausted those first few days, sleeping through most of it. Conversations with her tended to be rather one-sided due to the heavy drugs she was on. They dulled the pain but it hadn't gone away. It reminded her of this whenever she tried to do anything other than lie or sit still. Even talking and smiling made it flare up. Between the torture and the fight at the front door, she had collected a large range of injuries. Broken ribs that made it hurt to breath, head wounds, her mess of a mouth, pulled muscles, raw wrists - one dislocated, lots of scratches, lacerations deep enough to need stitches and a multitude of bruises, so many that they dominated her body's natural skin colour. She can feel herself sliding into a despondent mood and trying to pull herself out of it, she searches for silver linings.
At least the teeth that asshole extracted were at the back of my mouth.
Probably because he was a sadistic bastard who wanted to make the experience that much worse by shoving the pliers all the way in. She can remember gagging on them, whimpering, the sweat running down her face...swiftly her thoughts shrink back from this treacherous minefield of memories and her body shivers. Her mind grasps for something protect itself with, some form of happiness to latch on to.
Waverly.
Her frame begins to relax and the hold of the fierce anxiety loosens.
Waverly who seemed to be at her side more than half the times that she has woken up. Pouring over old manuals and books or on her laptop.
Or just napping in her chair. It was definitely hers now. She would be surprised if there wasn't Waverly shaped grooves in the cushion by now.
She wonders why she's not more worried about how nearly all her thoughts involve Waverly. How blind she is to anything unrelated to Waverly recently. Maybe she knows she's already too far gone.
The subject of her thoughts materialises to sit beside her with a weak greeting. Which is strange because it's late, exactly how late she doesn't know but it was definitely well past midnight.
Under the dim light Waverly looks weary, exhausted even. Visibly shrunken in her chair, it was as if gravity worked differently on her, like the force of it had increased. She could see where it ripped at her, dragging down her the corners of her eyes and tugging at her lips, creating new lines. It pulled at her shoulders and arms and hauled her head towards the ground.
Nicole wants to kick seven shades of shit out of something, anything. Unable to, she declares a war of a silent kind. Begins a patient siege with the use of her own magnetic field, planning cautiously to shift the heavy attraction of gravity. She increases the strength of her pull by moving closer to the edge of the bed, closer to her. Too drained to lift her head fully, she tows it behind her sliding it along her pillow. Raises her hand to stretch shakily out towards hers, causing a powerful surge in the enticing energy. When an affected Waverly looks up and accepts it, Nicole draws both their hands back, immersing them in the centre of her field. Waverly moves her chair forward and clasps her absorbed arm with her free hand nestling her head on top. Glances at Nicole and away again.
Nicole's heart had stopped momentarily at their proximity. She takes in an unsteady breath. Tempted to reach over and wrap the loose hair back behind Waverly's ear.
"They found my sister." Waverly breaks the silence.
"Wynonna? Is she ok. Did revenants..."
"No, no, not Wynonna. Willa. The one that was supposed to be dead." She sighs this out like it's something she can expel from her body. Nicole is a bit confused but she doesn't want to push it knowing that Waverly's fragile right now. That if she said the wrong thing she might shatter.
"Are you okay with it all?"
Waverly moves her head a little so she can see her better and she's studying her as if she's one of those old books she likes to read.
"I don't really know." She wraps her arms around herself, pulling Nicole's hand against the skin of her shoulder. Wavery quickly realises this and blinks hard twice at the culprit, before her surprised eyes meander towards hers. Nicole's breath is stolen by the enchanting vacuum that forms. Waverly's eyes flicker away again and she's launching into a rushed, agitated explanation.
"Dolls and Wynonna found her in a cult but she's doesn't remember anything from before it. Wynonna acts like everything is normal around her but it feels weird. She doesn't know us and I don't know her."
The forever bright exterior layer that always protects her is cracking, exposing her insecurities.
"And everything is changing around me, but it's all too fast, you know. Gus sold Shorty's. She acts like it's this great thing but now Bobo owns it. Like, could everybody just stand still for one frickin' minute?!" Voice raising at the end, Waverly finishes her tirade with a resigned sigh.
She's removed the figurative mask that keeps her safe, the invisible people pleasing armour that distances her from the Earp reputation.
"Hey... It's gonna be okay." She feels inadequate in her attempts to comfort her but is unable to think of anything more substantial. But for Waverly it must be enough as she responds with, "Why are you so nice to me? "
Not wanting to scare her off with the long list of all the reasons she's nice to her, she instead tries to inject a bit of humour into the conversation. She hopes it might cheer Waverly up slightly.
"You know, I think you've just been dating too many shitheads." The attempt falls flat on it's face.
"We're not dating."
Waverly has let go of her hand and is clutching her arms around herself, putting distance between them. Troubled over the development Nicole is at first tender but can't help the defensive tone that slips into her voice.
"I know...God, Waverly, I would never ask you to be someone you're not."
"Good. Just don't ask me to be anyone."
Nicole bites back the urge to utter a bitter "Fine." She lacks the energy to handle a prickly Waverly with her strained white knuckles, stubborn walls and tantalising presence.
Instead she goes with a barely there, "Okay" which comes out of her mouth laden with sorrow and defeat. She closes her eyes defensively against the jagged edges of her dreams breaking.
Feels fingertips brush against her knuckles before a hand briefly rests on hers and disappears again.
"I'm sorry Nicole. I'm taking this all out on you, that's the last thing I want." She opens her eyes again to see Waverly still withdrawn but with genuine apology evident in her face.
She's trying to stay awake but sleep is threatening to take her.
"Hey it's okay, go back to sleep. It's really late anyway I should get home. We can talk tomorrow and I'll bring you some apology banana muffins."
She ignores Nicole's weak protests and pulls the bed covers back over her. Sleep is pulling her in as Waverly is getting ready to leave. The last thing she sees is Waverly putting on her jacket. Hears a quiet goodbye and is almost completely under when she swears she feels a feather light kiss on her forehead.
Author's note: Sorry for the slow updating! I'm not finished with either of my fics it's just been super busy so there might not be any more updates till January
