Chapter 5 - Comfort
She allowed him to lean on her, using her for support as he fought to contain his Obscurus. His human form, so unstable despite her efforts to keep him calm, was wreathed in shadow with undulating wisps rising from the surface of his skin. But she thought she could help. She said so herself, though it seemed difficult to believe. He wondered why she would even bother. He wasn't worth her time.
"You probably aren't going to believe me, but what you're experiencing is actually quite normal."
His breathing hitched, a low, shuddering gasp falling from his lips. "What?" He must have misheard her. There was nothing normal about what he was. He was freak, a human oddity put on display for all the world to see.
"No, it's true. Witches and wizards often have difficulty sleeping between three and four in the morning. Our magic is at its strongest during this time, which causes sleep disturbances and unusual dreams. An ordinary wizard will eventually learn to control their magic so that it doesn't bother them. But you..." She paused, looking deep into his eyes and seeing only minute traces of color. "You haven't learned how to control it yet. And with your condition it's bound to be twice as difficult."
The Obscurus twitched beneath his skin, memories resurfacing as he recalled seeing her serpentine form on the floor beside his bed. He wondered if this time of night effected her too, forcing her to transform when she lay down to sleep.
His thoughts turned from these puzzling questions as she reached up and brushed the hair out of his face, her affection startling him out of his reverie.
"You're suppressing it," she said, tilting her head and gazing at him in the moonlight. "You need to find a balance because suppression is not control, Credence."
"But you said this was normal?" Credence asked, sounding somewhat skeptical.
"That's right. It is perfectly normal." She took his hand in hers, feeling him tremble at her touch. "I want you to close your eyes, concentrate on your breathing and visualize the darkness that surrounds you. See it changing from grey to white until it vanishes completely."
"What if I lose control?"
"You won't." The faintest of smiles flitted across her lips. She had so much faith in him, and in a way she was asking him to believe in himself.
Credence swallowed hard, his mouth suddenly dry. She told him to concentrate on his breathing, and yet he was more focused on the soft feel of her skin against his scarred hands. He worried that he wouldn't be able to control it, that he was nothing but a failure, a worthless wizard who probably didn't even belong in the magical world.
His muscles spasmed, causing him to squeeze her hand as he inhaled sharply. He closed his eyes, though only because he couldn't bare to look at her. He didn't want her to see him struggling like this.
The shadowy tendrils lengthened, though only for a moment before he slowed his breathing. Each time he inhaled he felt tension building, the tremors increasing in strength. He had to do this. If not for himself then for her, giving her some peace of mind and one less reason to worry about him.
He tried visualizing the Obscurus, seeing the swirling mass lightening at its core before shades of grey bled into its writhing limbs. With each breath the color began to fade, the tension lessoning until he was finally able to open his eyes.
"That's it," she said, her smile widening as she watched his Obscurus turn a dull shade of milky white before retreating into his body. "You're doing it, Credence."
Credence whispered her name, his eyes closing once more as he leaned into her touch. He felt ready to sleep where he was, his head resting on her shoulder as she glanced at the opening of the tent.
She could see that the moon had passed its highest point and was beginning its descent towards the horizon, letting her know that dawn wasn't far away. And in those final hours she held him close, letting him sleep beside her in the dark.
