Franzipan : Hey, I'm the one doing the bad puns here !

Guest : Still debating the ending (it's drafted but not definitive).

Wolfrider3000 : Neither can I. Oh wait...

Foxlover91 : It's more of a band-aid than a real patch at the moment. But time will heal (let's hope).

GhostWolf88 : The future will bring pain and tears. We're in one of my fics after all.

Saperjoe85 : Thanks, but he isn't done apologizing just yet.

Altair1812 : I caught my foot on my romantophone. Won't happen again.


Chapter 7 - The Slap

Nick was sipping coffee in the main room while he waited for his employees to show up. For once in a very long time, sleep had come easily.

The entry door creaked on his hinges. "Good morning Nick." Came Fin's deep voice.

"Morning pal." The tod answered. "We're talking again ?"

"Since you've stopped bein' a shithead, yeah, we are."

Nick chuckled. "Shit, I can't even say I don't deserve your snark."

"Dude, if there's to be some sorta justice, I owe ya 'bout 35 years of snark." The fennec fox shot back, before directing himself toward the megafauna sized sofa, using the plaid on it as a rope to get on it.

"I see you've woken up before your girlfriend. That's pretty rare."

The fennec fox squinted at the other tod. "She ain't my girlfriend. Are you going to use that as joke fodder against me ? Cuz' she wouldn't like 'dat."

"Oh, I'm pretty sure I could get her on board if it meant teasing you." Smirked Nick, while inspecting his claws.

The door opened again, to show the related pachyderm large frame. "Hey you two." she greeted. Joan purposely sat next to Finnick, making the cushion tilt, which made him slide against her in turn. Nick drowned his large grin inside his coffee cup.

Using her arm, the fennec fox climbed up to her shoulder, looking way more bashful than he usually did. Observing them, Nick noticed that the elephant was blushing too, probably because the both of them had indirectly admitted their attraction to one another.

"Heya guys." Came Duke's voice from the door. He was perched on Herbert's shoulder, which nodded in turn. The both of them were followed by Judy, who looked in a relatively good mood, even if she retained a general air of sadness. Nick almost missed her stiffen up when their gaze met.

"Hey Duke. Grunt. Carrots." Greeted Nick in turn. "Grunt, would you mind bringing the coffee pot and mugs for everyone ? I'd have done it but with bad leg..."

"Sure Boss." Nodded the ursid, making his way toward the kitchen, while Duke nimbly jumped from his shoulder to the sofa's backrest.

The bunny frowned. For a couple of moment, Judy wondered if it was some kind of power trip from Nick to ask Herbert to bring back the coffee pot. She knew he could stand and walk without his cane, and he probably had been waiting for them to show up. Then, the brown bear came back with a coffee pot that could have easily fitted a medium sized mammal in it.

The ursid then proceeded to pour coffee for everyone, even in the smaller mammals' mugs, without spilling so much of a drop.

"Okay, so first things first." Began the fox. "Judith Hopps, new recruit." He saw her tense up as he mentioned her name. "I know she's been with her for a bit yet, but for several reasons-"

"Mainly you being an idiot." Cut Finnick with a smirk, pulling a giggle from Joan.

"Trunks, keep your boyfriend on a tighter leash, will you ?" Shot back Nick without even looking at him. Joan coughed in her mug and the two mammals instantly fell silence and began blushing even harder than before.

"As I was saying, for several reasons, I haven't come around to properly present you. So Judy, could you please tell us a bit about yourself ?"

The bunny stood up a bit straighter. "Well… My name is Judith Hopps, but you all know you can call me Judy. I'm from Bunny-Burrow, I have two kids, and very large number of siblings… I have a degree in Criminal Law..." At that, all mammals present lifted their brows. It was a very unusual carrier pursuit for a bunny. " and Administration as well as twenty years of experience as a bun-sco- ranger scout. I also worked in the tri-burrows firewatch for ten years."

"Tha's a hell of a résumé." Commented Finnick. "She might be the most qualified mammal working here."

"Really ?" Reacted Judy. "I mean, I'm not even experienced at that kind of job."

Duke smirked. "Heh, none of us were, lady. As I heard, Trunks got the job because we needed muscle. The fact that she was far from a half-wit was just a bonus. As for me and Fin', we were just lucky that Nick isn't above favouritism."

"I wouldn't have hired you two if I didn't think you'd make the cut." Remarked Nick before turning toward the bunny again. "But, yeah, you're technically more qualified to do my work than I am. Speaking of which…" The fox raised a finger. "I need to take this out of the way : this isn't a democracy. It doesn't mean I don't want your input, in fact I require it, but in the end, I'm making the calls. If you have a doubt, call me on my phone or use your radio, but as a rule of thumb, use common sense. A few words about the lower levels of hierarchy : I don't care about them. As he has the seniority, Herb' is technically the boss when I'm not available, but it's more of a legality than anything else."

The bear nodded at that. He wasn't the kind to want more responsibility.

"I'd rather have you shoot your question at Joan, as she knows more about the MPRD than anyone else, so if you have questions go ahead and ask her. As for everyone's role…" He pointed at Duke.

"I'm in charge of stock and logistics. I buy stuff for cheap." He said proudly.

"Reparations mainly." Stated Herbert.

"My job is mammal safety. I also dabble in finance." Said Joan.

"Reparations too, plus I'm the unofficial MPRD head mechanic. And driver too. Oh, and legal counsel, kinda..."

"Of course, I expect everyone to perform their duties as rangers too." Added Nick. "That counts for me too as I'm the superintendant. As for you, you've been hired to be an intendant. This degree in administration will come very handy." He clapped his paws. "Now that the presentations are done, Duke, hit me."

"I made the list of stuff I need." Stated the weasel, getting a folded paper from his pocket. "Pipes, both copper and PVC, plus welding wire. We're going to need tiles for the roofs, especially now that one of the new room is occupied, and a heap of other things."

"You still have your connections. Go work'em."

"Aye-aye sir." Jokingly answered the weasel.

"Legal connections. I'll need receipts." Added the fox. "And run it by me before buying."

"Killjoy."

Nick winked. "You know it. Take Grunt with you to carry the stuff. Trunks, still on river duty ?"

"Still, yeah. This is taking longer than I expected, but Judy is being a big help."

Judy couldn't stop the proud smile that plastered itself on her face. Having her effort acknowledge felt good.

"Then, I hate to break a winning team, but I'm going to have to. I'm going to introduce her to the hell that has been my world for the last two months."

"Still ain't too late to quit, bunny." Smirked Finnick.

"I never quit." Judy shot back. "Not anymore." She added quietly to herself.

"Tha's the spirit. As for me, I think I'm going to try and take a look to at the water-heater in the housin' unit. If she's gon' stay here, she's gonna to need it." He said, pointing his thumb at Judy.

Nick nodded. "Good. Everyone knows their job, now get to it. Chop-chop." They all set their mugs down and Joan brought everything back to the kitchen before following her colleagues out.

"So it's just you and me, Carrots." Said Nick, before taking a couple of steps toward the stairs.

"What is it with the nicknames ?" She asked as she followed him. The question was innocent, but there was a sort of animosity in the bunny's attitude.

The fox shrugged. "That's just my thing."

"Why Carrots ?" Nick didn't miss the tinge of aggressivity under the curiosity.

"You grew up in Bunny-Burrow, so…" He smirked.

"Oh, that's very clever." She answered in an unimpressed tone. "What about 'Grunt' ?"

"Herbert used to only grunt as an answer. The words started coming out about two years after he was recruited."

"And Trunks ?"

"Take a guess."

The bunny rolled her eyes. "Because of the trunk… That's very-"

"Wrong." The fox kept smirking. "She wear trunks as underwear."

The bunny gave him a shocked look. "How do you know that ?"

"Because when she lived in the room downstairs, she sometimes forgot to dress up before attending the meetings. Still does with the caravan sometimes, to Fin's greatest joy." He answered without an ounce of shame.

"Do Finnick and Duke have nicknames ?"

Nick ran a claw between his fangs. "Finnick's already a nickname. I have no idea what his real name is, and believe it or not, it's the name he used on his contract. And Duke… Well, I used to call him Q-tip, back then when we were only unfriendly acquaintances. It was supposed to be demeaning, so I only use it tease him. Besides, I think Duke is an awesome name for a Weasel." The tod grinned. "You can tell him, he'll never believe I said that." He opened his office door to let her in. "Is calling you Carrots demeaning ?"

"I don't know Slick, what do you think ?" She asked, mirroring the grin he was wearing, though he could feel a tad of rigidity in her attitude.

"I think it suits you well, Carrots."


It was hell indeed, but not as much as the bunny had feared. At first, she had thought the tod's office was in total chaos, but as it happened, each time she needed a specific form or paper, he was able to direct her to the right one.

She soon realised it wasn't so much chaos, but rather a very strange form of organization. Between the regulation forms dating months back, labor agreements that had never been implemented to their department for almost a decade, they had their work cut out for them.

"So what was it about an inspection ?" Asked the bunny, while unceremoniously dropping a pile of filed paper on the tod's desk. It made him lift a brow.

"Around every four years, city hall sends external inspectors to all their branches to take a look and make a report. Last time that happened, I had one of Ramowitz's employees fired. I had collected so much proofs of his misdoing it should have been an open and closed case." Nick answered, while continuously typing away.

"Why wasn't it ?"

The fox shrugged dismissively. "A shifty fox was the one that came forward with everything, Arthur Ramowitz's name still had a bit of weight, the employee in question had a way to shift blame on everyone else… And the inspector might have been one of Ramowitz' close friends, a bull named Oxley... The guy wasn't to clever. Problem was that he was gullible, or just specist enough, to believe every nonsense Crapowitz' employees told him. Most of the time, just saying something that aligns with what the other wants to hear will be enough to fool them… Anyway, in the end, I might have slipped an e-mail to some mammals I know in the government to have more impartial set of eyes in the matter and speed things along."

"If you have so much connections, why don't you use them to protect yourself ?"

"Because I don't want to play that card if it's completely unfair to do so, and even if I didn't care about that, it wouldn't be enough to cover my mistakes. We toe the line, but we don't cross it."

The bunny was completing an unfinished form thanks to some paper Nick had finally been able to print. "And recruiting your friend isn't crossing the line ?" Her tone was slightly accusatory, which ruffled him the wrong way, but he couldn't blame her for being sceptical. He still added it as a note for later.

"As I said before, they were qualified. Maybe less than others, but still."

"Didn't they have jobs ? I mean, why would they leave everything to come here and work for you ?" She inquired.

The tod lifted his face from his work. "Are you implying I'm not a great boss ?"

"I haven't formed an opinion yet. And you haven't really answered my question." She answered neutrally.

"They had jobs, just very shitty ones. Finnick was still running cons, Duke was… Er… Acquiring and making deals on pharmaceutical products for third parties." She was about to go back to her own work when the fox spoke again. "So, no opinion ? Really ?"

The bunny shook her head. "Not at all."

"You know I'm not above nepotism, I didn't have any hesitation about going after the mammals that I couldn't stand, have been at odds with me previous boss since I had been hired, trashed you for no reason…" He enumerated on his fingers. "You're not going to make me believe you don't have an opinion about me."

The bunny was taken aback. Said like that, it sounded like a lot. "Mr Wi-"

"Isn't it 'Slick' to you ?" He smirked.

The bunny huffed. Was he being standoffish on purpose ? "Slick..." She began, trying to find her words. "I don't have a low opinion of you."

"Yes you do. And you're still pissed at me."

She was expecting to see him smirk, but his smile had shrunk down to mild.

"Maybe a bit…"

Nick shook his head with a chuckle. "You don't have to pretend not be mad at me."

"I'm not mad at you."

"No one gets treated like you were by me without carrying a grudge. That just doesn't happen."

"Nick-"

He lifted a paw. "Carrots, just because you want to forgive me, doesn't mean you have yet. I see you're still upset. I mean, I see how rigid you've been since we've started working together…"

"I'm not rigid !" She protested, getting up from the floor with a scowl.

He made finger pistols at her. "And there it is."

"There is what ?" She asked, her fist on her hips.

Nick crossed his fingers on his desk a stared at her knowingly.

At first, she couldn't understand what the fox was getting to. Then she remembered her attitude toward Gideon as he was trying to patch things up between them. She had met him with rebuttal, but over time, she had realised his effort were genuine. The only difference here, was that Nick was deliberately pushing her to make her anger come out. Pushing her was a big word, it had been more like nudging. She had been more than rigid, if she was honest with herself.

"You're right. I'm still mad at you." She sighed. "I don't want to, but I still am."

"Be mad then. I deserve it. It's healthy to be angry sometimes. You shouldn't bottle up your feelings."

"But you apologised." She protested.

"Genuinely might I add. But sometimes apologizing isn't enough."

The bunny's ears dropped. "It should be."

Nick chuckled. "Ha ! Really ? If Bellwether had apologized for what she had done, should she deserve to be forgiven ? If every mammal that had ever singled us out because of our species apologized, do you think they should be forgiven ? You're way nicer than me, Carrots, but I still doubt you could do it. I'll simply have to make it up to you. Somehow."

The bunny huffed, she couldn't say he was wrong, but he was a bit too smug about it. "You think you know how everymammal work, don't you ?"

"It was my bread and butter for years, Carrots. Of course I do. The fact that I have an inkling on how you think doesn't make you a lesser mammal." The fox had stood up from his chair, and had started walking around his desk toward her. "The thing is, even if you're still upset with me, it won't change the fact that I'll try to make you feel welcome. If what you need of me is to stay away, you just gotta ask."

Judy scratched her arm and looked away. "I don't want you to stay away. I think if I got to know you better, I could tolerate you." The shadow of a smile followed her little jab.

"Tolerate, huh ? Guess I deserved that. That's all that could help ?"

Judy answered with a nod.

"Don't you want to shout at me ?"

She shook her head.

"Or to make a strongly worded comment ?" There was some snark in his voice, but to not as much as honesty.

"You'd let me berate you ?" She asked.

Nick shrugged. "If it helped." He couldn't stop the hint of smugness in his voice. The fact that the bunny seemed so surprised didn't help.

"Right now, I mostly want to slap away that smug grin." She smiled.

Nick cocked his head, before planting his cane to the ground in front of him to stabilize himself. "Go ahead."

Judy blinked a couple of times, taking in what he had just said. "I was just joking."

"No you weren't." The smug grin was still there.

She wanted to deny it, but part of her actually did want that. He truly was infuriating when he wanted to be. "It doesn't mean I'll do it."

"Still above hitting a cripple ?"

"I'm sorry I called you a cripple." She muttered, her ears falling. "And I'm still not slapping you."

Nick's grin grew smugger. "I know at least a hundred mammals that would dream to be in your place right now. Do it for them."

"Nick..."

"Come on, you know you want to." If his grin grew wider, it would probably split his head in halves.

"Do I know that ? Yes, yes I do." She grunted under her breath. "Don't tempt me…"

"I'm literally asking for it, Carrots."

"Alright."

Her paw shot quicker than he had expected, but he wasn't going to try and evade anyway. She had jumped to make it easier for her paw to connect with his face, and when it did, he couldn't help but spin and fall on one knee. "Woah, Carrots, I wouldn't want to be on the wrong side of your punches." He said, a bit groggy.

"Oh sweet cheese and crackers, I didn't think I'd hit you so hard." She rushed to his side to help him stand back up. "Are you okay ?"

The fox wiped his mouth with the back of his paw and found some blood on it. "I've had worse. Do you feel better ?"

"Kinda…" She admitted shamefully. "At least the smug is gone."

"Careful with that kind of comment, it could come right back." The fox put a paw to his jaw. "I'm going to need and ice-pack."

"I'll go fetch one." Judy proposed, stepping toward the door.

"Don't bother going downstairs, I have my own fridge, there should be some in the freezer."

There indeed were ice packs, as he sometimes used them on his knee at the end of a long day.

"I'm sorry." She said as she handed him the cold pack.

"Don't be. Really. It'll teach me to try to act cool at my age." Smiled the fox.


The afternoon went by relatively quickly, and they were about to call it a day when a knock came from the door.

"Come in." Called Nick.

The door opened and Finnick appeared. He was wearing a strange expression between meek and determined. His eyes went from Nick to Judy and he sighed. "Nick, I have something to ask ya."

"Do you want me to leave you two alone ?" Asked Judy, who had noticed his behaviour.

"Nah, you might actually be of better counsel than'im."

"Hurtful." Commented the red fox. "What did you need ?"

The fennec fox shifted from what foot to the other. "Well, as you know, I want to take Jo on a date, and I've no idea where to. Or when, since we are pretty swamped at the moment."

Given Judy's presence, Nick refrained himself from telling where he could 'take' her. "Why don't you bring her to one of you usual dives. They're mostly decent."

Finnick lifted a brow. "I ain't just lookin'to get us tipsy and ready for a good shag. This a date, as in 'proper date'. Not that ya'd know anything about that."

Nick smirked and turned his gaze back to the computer screen. "Here goes my motivation to help you out."

"Aw come on ! Don't be like that ! Help a brotha' out !"

"Take her to the Palm hotel, then. She'll probably love it." Suggested Nick.

The small vulpine groaned. "I don't have three months of salary to blow on one meal. Unless you're going to give me a raise."

"I know for a fact that you have way more than tree months of salary saved up. I'm a bit disappointed that you wouldn't be ready to spend that on Joan. I don't know If I could let you take my little girl to the prom if you act so cheap." Nick snarked, relishing Finnick's blush.

"Why are we fuckin' friends again ?"

"Because you love me."

Finnick glared at Nick while the red fox kept his half-lidded eyes trained on him.

"You're going to want a place that can accommodate both small mammals and megafauna. As a vulpine, you can easily go a meal or two without touching meat, so any restaurant like that might do. You could go for a restaurant that serves both herbivores and carnivores, but I suggest avoiding those that serve fish." Judy said.

The vulpines started staring at the bunny.

"What ? I have carnivores friends. Getting out to eat together was always a challenge."

"I didn't say anything." Said Nick. "Please resume."

Judy glanced from one mammal to the other before proceeding. "I don't know much about Joan, but she doesn't seem to be the type appreciate big gestures, so aim for something nice but cheap. She seems shy, and if it's a date, I'd suggest finding a place which is friendly to interspecies couple. I don't think she'll be comfortable if all eyes are on the both of you. So, maybe something cozy… Alternatively you could just cook for her."

Nick snickered. "Finnick cooking. Yeah, right." Before pulling his wallet from his pocket and trudging inside it.

"Ya could stand to be helpful instead of snarky." Reacted Finnick.

The red fox pulled out a business card from his wallet and gave it to his friend. "I think Carrots is exactly right about every single thing she just said. Call this place, I know for a fact they can accommodate elephants. I'd suggest making a reservation though, they tend to be full in the evening. Don't hesitate to drop my name, that should move things along."

Judy wondered why the fox would have the card for such a place. After a few seconds of thinking, she blushed slightly. The answer was obvious.

Finnick glared at his best friend. "You could have just led with that."

"But where would be the fun ?"

Finnick pocketed the card. "Thanks, I guess." He said, before leaving.

After the small vulpine had disappeared, Judy turned toward Nick. "Did you really have to rile him up like that ?"

"Did I ? Oh yes, yes I did."