Thank you one and all for not forgetting my story! As a side note, I was kidding about the choices in actors that I named (its all for comedic effect) but I have heard that they want an A-list actor being Freddy.
Tom Cruise: What do you mean you were kidding? I'm one of the greatest actors in the – AAARRGGGHHHH (Is carried off by Jason)
Lucard: Hmmmm so Frederick Charles Kruger is getting a character facelift....I'm afraid that's not all he needs.
Freddy: (snarls) I HEARD THAT! (makes garlic fall on Lucard's head)
Lucard: (hisses and disappears)
Ash: I'd like to nominate an A-list grade actor to be Freddy!
Freddy: Oh is that so?
Ash: Yep...Bruce Campbell all the way!!!
Freddy: (howls in exasperation) I can never win!
Oh and as a side note, I apologize for taking so long. I was at the Eagles concert last night and my attention was focused on a certain member of the band. (giggles mischeivously as Don Henley suddenly appears)
Don Henley: (blinks) How the heck did I get here? (looks around, caught by surprise when the author jumps onto his lap) What the hell!
Freddy: (snickers) My friend, you have just been kidnapped by the dark queen herself...I warn you...fangirls are insane (shrieks as he suddenly finds himself in another room full of fangirls with no escape)
Don Henley: (hears Freddy scream like a girl, arching an eyebrow) Should I be fearing for my life here?
Synn: Nah you're safe with me (hugs him with a death grip) I'm your biggest fan!
Djinn: On with the story (rubs temples)
DISCLAIMER: I own nothing! Ya hear me? NOTHING!!!
The party was still going on after a few hours and Freddy was ready to kill some of the actors, censorship or not. He still couldn't believe that one of the pompous asses he was trying to avoid had a chance to portray him.
"Oh god" Freddy moaned as Keanu Reeves said a few of his lines in his presence "Somebody kill me now...or somebody kill him! He has no talent!"
He turned and started walking away when he was approached by Johnny Depp.
"Hey Freddy" Johnny said, clapping him on the back "How long has it been? 24 years?"
"About that" Freddy muttered under his breath "I certainly hope you are in the running to play me because you're the only talented actor here tonight"
"That's quite the compliment, Freddy" Johnny said, smiling "I am grateful that your movies gave me my start in Hollywood. I wouldn't be who I am today without you"
"Pussy" Eric Bana said, rolling his eyes as he passed them "If you're so great, why weren't you the hulk or Henry VII?"
"Because, unlike you" Freddy said, coming to Johnny Depp's defense "He doesn't suck. Why don't you start playing the didgeridoo for the kangaroos, koalas and dingoes? I think you'd be better at that than acting."
"I'm more manly than the both of them" Hugh Jackman said gruffly, doing an impression of Wolverine "I've played Van Helsing and Wolverine...I'm better for the role"
"Why don't you go chasing the Wolfman some more?" Freddy growled, pushing Hugh out of the way "I don't want 2009's Sexiest Man playing me"
The A-list actors remained at the mansion until about 10 pm or so. Freddy was very happy to see them leave the party, making mental notes to appear in the dreams of those he hated. When the last actor left the mansion, Freddy sank down on the couch, breathing a sigh of relief.
"ASHLEY" he barked, loosening his bowtie before appearing in his traditional garb again "BRING ME A BEER"
His order was met by a beer bottle to the head. Growling and rubbing the back of the head, he flicked off the cap and drank the beer greedily.
"It wasn't that bad, was it?" Lucard intoned, walking into the living room "I'm more used to politicians and other businessmen at my parties"
"I need to have a talk with the director of this remake" Freddy said, finishing the beer before throwing it at Ash, who was busy clearing away the glasses and empty bottles. He let out a chuckle when the bottle hit Ash square in the head, knocking him unconscious.
"I have to admit that Robert Englund is the only one that knows the role well enough to play you" Djinn said, appearing on the couch opposite Freddy "I didn't like any of the A-listers that came here."
Jason walked into the room wordlessly, writing something furiously down on a pad of paper. He handed it to Freddy before sitting next to Djinn.
"Hmmm" Freddy said, reading Jason's note "There's a dead A-lister in the kitchen...WHAT?? WHO?"
Jason snatched the pad of paper and wrote his reply down before handing it to Freddy.
Freddy read it and began to chuckle. Soon, his chuckles turned into full blown laughter.
"Well, Freddy?" Djinn inquired, folding his arms across his chest "Who is it?"
"Ben Affleck" Freddy howled, tossing the pad of paper down "Jason, I could kiss you for that. You were the one who killed him, right?"
Jason shook his head no.
"Well then, who did?" Lucard inquired coolly "If it wasn't you or one of us..."
Jason picked up the pad of paper and wrote furiously before handing it to Djinn.
"Oh my" Djinn remarked as he read Jason's note "It definitely wasn't one of us housemates. It was Colin Farrell"
"I wonder why" Freddy inquired, laughing harder "Maybe he was mad about working on Daredevil with him. That movie sucked!"
"According to Jason's note" Djinn said, reading further "Colin was just really drunk and Ben happened to get in the way"
"What a strange turn of events" Lucard marvelled, smirking evilly "I must say that I rather enjoyed hearing that. With Ben out of the picture, more good movies will be made!"
With that, he burst into evil laughter. Freddy, Djinn and Jason joined in...
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I apologize to any fans of Ben Affleck and of Colin Farrell and to these actors themselves as this is just in fun. I have nothing against either of them. Please don't take this chapter seriously.
Freddy: HEY! I have something against Ben Affleck! It's called GIGLI! (falls into unconsciousness as another beer bottle is lodged at his head, courtesy of Ash)
Djinn: Thanks, Ash. If you hadn't stopped him, he would have kept on complaining.
Jason: (pokes Freddy in the ribs with his machete curiously before kicking him hard a few times)
Ash: Hey, Jason...save some for the boomstick, will ya? (pulls out boomstick and shoots Freddy in the arm) I've always wanted to do that.
Don Henley: (in disbelief) Are things always this insane?
Synn: (still sitting on his lap while keeping him locked in a death grip) Just pretend they don't exist. I'm the one you should lavish your attention on.
Don Henley: Ummm okay! (Starts singing "One of These Nights")
