CHAPTER 5

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Hope you enjoy this chapter.

A Second Chance?

Grissom reached for the pile of files that Catherine had dropped off yesterday and sat on his couch. Settling back into the cushions, he let out a sigh.

He wished he could get back to work. Not just doing paperwork at home, but real work, out in the field, though it would still be a while before that was possible according to his doctor.

He knew he had been stupid to ignore his illness, but work was the best way he knew how to forget. So he threw himself into his work. Trouble is it hadn't really been successful. Once everyone stopped asking him if he was ok and trying to get him to go out with them, they had gone the other way and almost ignored him.

Well maybe that was a bit harsh, he knew they hadn't done that, but the invitations stopped and they pretty much left him alone. He knew he had scared them, hell, he'd scared himself. So now they were regular visitors, making sure he was ok, keeping him up to date with the lab and bringing him work to do at home.

Grissom knew he should be grateful, but the one thing he wanted they never brought him. He was positive that Greg, Nick or Warrick were sure to have been in touch with Sara, but they never let on. Maybe that was because they blamed him for her leaving, and even though he knew that they were probably right, it hurt.

Pushing these thoughts aside he focused on the files in front of him. He picked up the first two and put them aside, he had already made some notes on those and needed to discuss them with Nick later. He pulled a pile of papers from a large padded bag and glanced at the note that Catherine had stuck to the top piece.

Please check this report from Washington FBI on entomological timeline. If there are any problems let me know so that I can liaise with them

Catherine.

As he read through the report and studied the photos, Grissom was pleasantly surprised. Whoever did this was very good. There was no name attached, it was just marked as from the Washington crime scene unit of the FBI.

His interest piqued, Grissom decided to read the report in more depth, taking his time. By the time he was on the third page which held the entomological time line he was struck by the familiarity. It was almost as if he had done this report himself.

His heart jumped in his chest and he felt himself breathing more rapidly. Could it be? Could Sara have done this? It had to be her. No-one else would show so many similarities in the presentation of the evidence to himself. She had assisted him so many times that she would be able to do the entire thing on her own, which would explain the similarities to his own reporting methods.

Setting aside the report, Grissom made his way to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator. He retraced his steps to the couch and picking up the report headed for his office and the computer.

He sent off a report to the FBI, letting them know that nothing needed to be changed, that the findings were correct and conclusive. Once that was done he checked his inbound mail. For the second time that morning his heart jumped and his breath caught in his throat as her name appeared on the screen.

Rubbing his hand over his face, Grissom realised that he was scared to open it. It had been six months with no contact and now twice in one day she had invaded his world. Taking a deep breath, he opened her email, at once wanting to read it so badly but so terrified at what it might say.

Hello Grissom,

I can guess that you are surprised to hear from me after so long. In fact I'm surprised myself that I am doing this, but I need to do this.

What the hell do you think you were doing?

Were you trying to kill yourself or was it just an oversight for you, to take care of yourself?

Do you know how it felt to be told by my boss that you were too ill to travel and not know why?

How many times have you told me not to work so hard?

How many times have you made me go home when I didn't want to because I was sick?

So it's ok for you to make me/us look after ourselves but not you?

I don't know who I am angrier at, you for obviously not caring about yourself or your team for not seeing what was going on. They must be blind.

Grissom stopped reading for a moment, taking in the anger in her words. How dare she rant and rave at him when she was the one that left and caused all the problems in the first place. He was getting angry himself, and considered not reading any further but the next line stopped him.

I'm sorry Grissom.

I'm sorry for ranting at you (though I must say I feel a little better now).

I know I probably have no right to be angry at you, especially after the way I left and I'm sure you're feeling angry yourself right now. You know? I thought I could just forget everything when I left. But I guess you can't just turn off feelings can you?

You scared me. Did you know that?

Maybe the way I left was not the best way when I think back on it but I won't apologise for that. At the time it was by far the best option to take because I knew you would try to convince me to stay and I really could not have dealt with that again. We would have just ended up not speaking to each other again.

We hadn't been able to talk for a while had we Griss? I guess that was both our faults. Someone told me recently that it's hard to get a word in edgeways during a full blown Sidle Tsunam and maybe they are righti. But I have to say you are not the greatest communicator either. I guess we really are socially inept.

Grissom felt his anger waning and his mouth turned up in a small smile at the thought of the many Sidle Tsunami's he had witnessed.

Do you think that maybe we could improve our conversational skills this way? You know via email. I mean, we have really never been able to talk well face to face. This way feels safe. No confrontations. We would have to be honest with each other though, don't you think. Maybe we can start over, forget the mistakes of the past few years and get back the friendship we once had.

What do you think Griss? Should we give it a go?

If I don't receive a reply I will understand.

Sara

Grissom read the message several times. She didn't hate him. She wanted to try again, beginning at friendship and if this was the way to get it back, he was willing to try too.

For too long he had denied his feelings for Sara and it came back and bit him in the ass well and truly. In fact it surprised him that she was apologising to him at all. He deserved her anger, he had been a fool, but here she was, the one offering the proverbial olive branch. Now he had the chance to remedy things and he was going to take the opportunity he had been offered and make every effort to fix what he had broken.