Disclaimer: Ed, Edd N Eddy and all its characters are copyright AKA Cartoon. I am not using them for profit; I am simply using them to practice my own writing skills….

Author: Yahoo! And now I am going into the deepest parts of my mind to drag out the weirdest I have to offer (hopefully, it's weird enough)… yes, I am now doing ED! WARNING WEIRDNESS AHEAD WARNING WEIRDNESS AHEAD

Chapter Four: Ed, Holder of the Parallel Universe

The vortex disappeared, leaving Ed in his back yard…

NO! Upon second inspection, Ed realized he was on ION, Jupiter's undiscovered moon-straight out of the comic! "COOL!" He yelled.

He looked around the barren plains of ice. Instantly, he knew that ice demons were hiding among the sky-touching pillars of purplish ice. Ed looked down at his outfit. "Woah, I am a Space Ranger!" he said upon inspection of his uniform.

Like before, Ed wore a green jacket, but his shirt was replaced with space-age armor, incrusted with what looked like… a crystal? His jeans were replaced with SUPER PANTS, which enabled him to fly and were white in color! He also noticed he was wearing a crown/helmet and was holding a cool sword made out of a substance harder than diamonds.

As he had expected, ice demons suddenly emerged from the purple ice towers! "ED, RETREAT!" A voice behind him yelled.

Ed looked at the army of ice creatures running toward him, malice in their eyes, weapons in hand, and decided he would fight them at a later time. He ran away, screaming as if though he were begging Sarah not to tell on him.

He saw a few seconds of running later a gigantic swirling whole in the ground and a really tall penguin staring at him. "ED, THE ICESHES ARE COMING! JUMP IN THE TELEPORTER, QUICK!"

Ed stared at the penguin long enough to yell, "COOL!" Before remembering where he was and jumping in the teleporter.

As he fell, Ed began to wonder where the teleporter would send him, and whether that penguin-thing was trustworthy or not…. Before he could begin to panic, he was spewed out of the portal into his back yard (for real, this time).

The back yard was the only thing Ed recognized- the sky was all black and star-filled, as if it was night, but the sun was shining; and the area where his house should have been was replaced with a gigantic palace made out of the similar substance to the one his armor was made out of.

Seconds later, the penguin appeared out of the glowing green vortex in the sky. It turned to Ed and asked, "Are you alright, sir?"

"I'm fine, thank you," he said, "this place is COOL! It's just like my comic books!"

The penguin gave Ed a confused (and concerned) stare, but before it could say anything, somebody came out of the palace, grumbling.

Ed blinked as the alien approached him. It had green skin (as all aliens in cliché comics do), was bald, and had three eyes, but otherwise looked human. The creature wore an outfit similar to Ed's, except purple in color, and jacket and crystal-less. The space-creature was holding a device. The alien said, in English, "What's wrong with this darn teleporter? I know I adjusted the coordinates so it would teleport you into the meeting hall…"

"Meeting hall?" Ed asked.

The alien looked up at Ed, as if noticing him for the first time. "Greetings, Ed," it than turned to the tall penguin, "Hello, Skuashi… Did you collect the information?"

"No," the penguin, or Skuashi, replied. "The spaceship was sent off course by some of the Trebles and landed on Jupiter's 25.5th moon, Ion. The Iceshes attacked us, and I was barely able to open the teleporter in time to save Ed."

The alien shuddered. "Trebles AND Iceshes in one mission…."

A second of silence passed, and Ed had to resist the urge to yell out one of the many questions in his head. What species are you, he wanted to ask the alien, and what are Trebles and Iceshes? How come I am a SPACE RANGER? Do you know I come from an alternate universe?

Somehow, quite uncharacteristically, he kept quiet.

The other two noticed. "Are you okay, Ed?" Skuashi asked.

"Uhhhh…."

Luckily, Ed was saved from explaining by a scream from behind him. He turned around to see the tree in his back yard become… a young (or old?) woman!

Her appearance was most peculiar. Her figure was obviously that of a kid around Ed's age, but her long hair was silver and her silver eyes squinted as if though she were going blind. Her face had a few wrinkles and her fingers- the only thing showing threw her childish, bright pink, crystal-less version of Ed's outfit- were old and chapped. She looked very much like a young, old woman.

The woman, too, held a device much like the alien's, but this one had a long green trail coming out; it was obviously scanning Ed.

"What is it, Transformer-Saraline?" the alien asked.

"Ed's MOLECULES!" The girl/woman, obviously Saraline, yelled.

"What about my molecules?" Ed asked. Fear struck his mind- maybe, after being on Ion for so long, his molecules were mutating….

"They're made out of matter! PURE MATTER! No anti-matter, not even any semi-matter or magi-matter, just matter! It's not possible!" Saraline exclaimed.

Gasps came from the other two creatures. Ed scratched his head. "Magi-matter? Semi-matter?"

"Yes, those are two of the four forms of matter. But something happened while you were on the trip- you originally had a healthy mix of anti-matter, matter, semi-matter and even a bit of magi-matter. But now- ALL of your cells are made up of matter!" Saraline cried, again.

"But doesn't anti-matter explode upon impact with matter?" Ed asked, confused. The little he knew about science dealing with anti-matter was becoming very chopped up.

"No," all three of the people he met said.

"Unless…" Saraline mumbled.

"Unless what?" Ed, the alien, and the penguin asked in unison.

"Unless you are from a parallel universe made completely of matter!" Transformer-Saraline said, jumping up and down in excitement.

The other two turned to Ed. "Are you from a parallel universe?" Skuashi asked.

"Yes, I am," Ed said after a short hesitance.