If We Had Hearts

Author's Note: Sorry about the long delay in this chapter. It was originally supposed to be longer, but the pace was throwing me off so I had break the chapter up. Hopefully this will allow a better flow into the next chapter and give you a more entertaining read. Thanks for your patience! Enjoy!

Chapter 14: The Puppet Master

Namine stare with horror as she looked upon the sleeping girl behind the oval glass. Through her magic she'd tried desperately to tie together the links and memories within Sora's heart, but she couldn't complete them without the missing pieces. Her conscience heavy with regret, Namine wished she'd never had a part in this. She wished she'd never taken apart Sora's memories. Unless Riku could find Xion and get the memories back, Sora would be lost forever.

"What has happened?" Diz strolled up behind her and she turned to face him, eyes wet and filled with worry.

"Sora's memory has stopped."

"What does that mean?" He nodded his head beckoning her to continue the explanation.

"Unless something is done, she'll never wake from her slumber." She folded her hands. "Without her memories of Riku and Kairi, Sora will remain asleep forever, or be forced to awaken incomplete and unable to recall who she was, or the friends she'd always cherished."

"The kid gloves must come off then." Diz told her coldly.

"...but Diz-" Namine started to protest.

"A nobody was never meant to exist, as I'm sure you'll very well aware Namine."

She couldn't argue, couldn't deny that her own "non-existence" had caused so many problems. She lowered her head in shame.

"Yes."

~World that Never Was~

Roxas didn't like it, but it was back to routine. Even with Xion back things were tense between the three of them. They still met for ice cream… sometimes. They sat and watched the sunset together… sometimes. No one spoke about the fight, or the reason Xion left. No one asked argued or made accusations… they just accepted the situation as it was.

...frankly, it was lonely.

"Things are never gonna go back to how they were. At least if we argued maybe we could have some of that connection back. Now it just feels… forced." Roxas deduced sitting on her bed alone.

"How pathetic am I?" She laughed sourly. "I only have myself to talk to about these problems." She sighed and lay down staring at the ceiling. For days now she'd spent the nights alone tossing and turning. She missed having Axel nearby, missed holding onto him… and wished she could just rewind the clock and make things right.

"I miss you guys." She covered her eyes with the back of her hand… and felt the first tear fall.

~Day 321~

Roxas often woke up from dreams with tears dried on her cheeks. Her chest felt so heavy, her body sluggish. Day after day, mission after mission she felt herself becoming drained and wished she knew what to do to give herself energy again.

"Maybe… I need a vacation. Axel always rests during-" she paused and shook her head cursing. She wished she could stop thinking about him. It was getting irritating that her thoughts always circled back to him.

Maybe… she should go see that gang in Twilight Town. That Hayner guy was really nice and offered to show her around and hang out. She would like to make more friends… and was it really against the rules to have friends outside of the organization?

She stepped into the mission room and immediately Xion took notice of her.

"Roxas are you okay?"

"Huh?" Roxas looked up at Xion surprised by the concern in her voice. "What?"

"You look really pale. Are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." She forced a smile. "Just didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Bad Dream."

"I've had those days." Xion returned the smile. "I'll do what I can to support you. Seems we're being put on a mission together today."

"Alright, I'll try not to slow you down then." The smile turned more genuine and the two stepped up to Saix to get their assignment.

They had to track down heartless in Agrabah. Normally these were the easy missions but today Roxas just couldn't find the energy to put up much of a fight. Xion wound up doing most of the work, and it was a situation neither of them were used to.

"Damn this thing is annoying." Roxas grit her teeth blocking another oncoming attack from the heartless shaped like a spinning ball with spikes. She skidded back, raised up the keyblade to strike and felt as if she were raising a fifty ton boulder over her head. She went to her knees panting.

"Roxas look out!" Xion rushed the heartless jumping and cutting through the heartless with a force that surprised stare at her own keyblade blinking. "Whoa… how did I… oh Roxas!" She hurried over and knelt down beside her. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just tired." She let her keyblade fade and she held her head. "I need a minute to catch my breath. I don't know what's with me lately, everytime I try to use the keyblade I run out of steam so quickly."

"You look really sick, Roxas. We completed the mission, we should RTC before you collapse or something."

"Yeah… I've been pulling a lot of missions so maybe I'm just overworked." She let Xion help her up. "Thanks. I'm sorry you had to do most of the work today."

"Don't worry about it… come on let's get out of here." Xion walked beside her, making sure to keep a close eye on her. When they returned to the warp she watched Roxas walk into the fog and paused to collect her thoughts.

"Hey you coming?" Roxas poked her head back through the warp.

"Huh? Oh yeah, coming!" She jogged in behind her. The two of them reported in before going to Twilight Town for ice cream. As they sat and ate Xion watched Roxas… the fatigue ebbed some and the smile back on her face. "You sure you're alright?"

Roxas paused and had to let out a little laugh. She rubbed the back of her head smiling warmly.

"This is getting a little weird."

"Huh?"

"Since when do you ever worry about me?" Roxas held her empty ice cream stick staring down at the blank.

"Hey, what do you mean weird?"

"Well, usually I'm the one worrying over you. I don't think it's ever been the other way around before." She looked back over at Xion. "It just feels strange… that's all."

"Roxas…" Xion slowly turned her gaze back to the sunset. She wasn't sure how to respond, wasn't sure what to say… so she said the first thing that came to mind. "Of course I worry about you."

It made her relieved, Roxas realized and had to hold in the the tears of relief. She felt a puzzle piece slowly clicking into place.

"I'm happy you're back, Xion. Even if it was rough on you… I've missed you."

"Mmmm I missed you too." Xion glanced back in wonder and then pouted a little. "Is Axel coming today?"

Roxas' face fell and she turned her head away.

"Hmmph, who cares?"

"Roxas?" Xion frowned at that. "You didn't fight, did you?"

"Tch, I'm still angry with him for what he did. I mean how could he do it?" She whirled back her blue eyes blazing with anger. "How could that jerk attack you like that?"

"That jerk? You mean Axel?" Xion turned her eyes downward. A part of her kinda hoped she and Axel would drift apart so she could have a chance with him… but the thought of the three of them breaking apart over her selfish actions outweighed it. "I wouldn't be sitting here with you if he hadn't done that you know."

Roxas cast her eyes downward.

"So?"

"So?" Xion laughed a little patting her shoulder. "Roxas, Axel's your best friend… no he's more than that to you. You said you love him didn't you?"

"I'm a nobody…" Roxas said with some spite and sadness. "How do I know what real love is?"

"Roxas…" Xion said with a scolding tone. "Come on… you know as well as I do that it's just not the same without the three of us."

Roxas sighed heavily, her eyes going sad and pained.

"No…" She pulled her legs to her chest and buried her face in her knees. Xion lay a hand on her back stroking it comfortingly. "It's really not."

~Later~

Xion had managed to track Axel down. He was casually strolling down the slope of the castle and she jogged up to meet him.

"Wait! Axel!"

Axel paused his walk. He'd been in a foul mood for days, and didn't feel much like socializing… but managed to put a wry smile on his face.

"Something on your mind, Xion?"

"It's… it's about Roxas." She panted catching her breath. She'd wandered all over looking for him and was glad she caught him when she did. "There's something wrong with her. You don't know what, do you?" She watched Axel's eyes harden. "Roxas says the keyblade is tiring her out… and today I've felt stronger than I ever have, I beat a powerful heartless all by myself without breaking a sweat."

Axel was at his limit. He didn't want to play the nice guy anymore. He hadn't spoken to Roxas in days, but he'd seen the fatigue and drain on her face everyday before missions. Anger boiled inside and he clenched his fists at his side.

"You would know more about Roxas than I do by now."

"Huh? What do you mean?" Xion said with confusion on her face.

"Well what do you think, Xion?" He said with an exasperated sigh. Hadn't she caught on yet? She'd done all that digging, looked into her own background… and yet she couldn't put two and two together. "Could it be because you're a puppet?"

Xion's face went pale and shock flickered in her eyes. She looked up at Axel frightened. How had he found out? Or had he always known who she was?

"You're a replica… one created to copy Roxas' powers. So if you see Roxas' powers getting weaker while yours are getting stronger… it could be you're robbing more of her power than yo ought to be." He said with obvious disdain in his voice.

"I… oh…" she covered her mouth. "What can I… no what SHOULD I do?" She looked up at him her eyes pleading.

"You gotta think for yourself. If you continue just taking orders then all you'll ever be is a puppet." At her look of despair the anger in him subsided and he sighed heavily. Stepping closer ge took her shoulders in his hands. "You and I both know you're more than that. We're best friends... you, Roxas, and I."

Xion looked up at him, emotions swirling in her eyes. Axel gave her his usual cocky smile and had that fluttering returning to her chest.

"Got it memorized?"

"Sure." She smiled.

The moment was a tender one, and one that seemed to save their friendship. Unbeknownst to them Roxas watched from the platform above, saw the intimacy and care and had to hold her chest as pain just erupted there. She ran back to her room the tears back and flooding down. What the hell was this feeling she had? What was going on inside her? Why did it bother her so much that Xion and Axel were becoming close…

She slammed the door shut to her room and collapsed on the floor. With no apparent rhyme or reason big heavy sobs escaped her lips and she curled into a ball on the floor just letting out everything that was going on inside her, hoping it would somehow ease the pain.

"What is…" she sobbed out clutching her chest. "What is this?"

~Day 352~

Roxas buried herself in work. She met up with Axel and Xion for ice cream but kept quiet most of the time. She listened to Axel and Xion talk back and forth around her… and wondered if it would be better if she just stopped coming and let the two of them bond.

She glanced at Axel briefly as she came into the mission room. While he and Xion conversed, her eyes watched his face go through a variety of expressions as he told her about his latest frustrating mission. He'd once looked at her like that… had once openly talked with her like that.

The pain started to resurface and she quickly averted her gaze letting out a shaky sigh. No… she couldn't think of that right now. She had a job to do.

"Work, work, work…" she murmured to herself and stepped up to Saix.

"Roxas…" Saix narrowed his eyes on hers. "I have a very important mission for you and your keyblade today."

Axel's ears perked up at that and he narrowed his gaze on Saix. He knew exactly what kind of special mission had been in the works, and wasn't about to let Roxas fall into the trap.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, you sure about that?" Axel stepped up suddenly breaking the conversation.

"Axel?" Roxas looked up at him shocked. They barely had spoken a word to each other after the incident with Xion, so to have him suddenly speak up for her made her both curious and happy.

"You sure you want to go on this mission?" He turned concerned eyes to her and reached stroking her cheek. "You've been looking really tired lately. Maybe you should take a day off."

"You don't get to decide that." Saix countered narrowing his eyes. "Besides, shouldn't you be concentrating on your own mission."

"Hey listen-" Axel started to retort but Roxas' soft touch to his shoulder, and sweet smile had him halting.

"I appreciate your concern Axel," She let out a relaxed sigh and lifted on her toes to kiss his cheek, much to the disgust of Saix. "I'll be fine." She stepped away and turned towards the warp.

"...but Roxas-" he took her hand started to pull her back but Saix stepped between them.

"Get back to work, Axel. This is not a social hour." He glared, silently warning him to not interfere. Axel's eyes look pained as he stared at Roxas' disappearing form. He glanced back saw Xion was gone, having already left for her own mission.

He jerked away from Saix and opened up a portal stepping through it. He was supposed to go to Neverland for recon… but instead stepped into the shadowy world of Halloween Town.

"What am I doing?" He asked himself holding his head. "I keep interfering like this… I'm the one that's gonna get turned into a dusk."

In the distance he could hear the sounds of a fight and his chest tightened. He shut his eyes turning his back preparing to leave and let things play out… but the sound of Roxas' scream had him cursing and racing through the town.

He darted through the townsfolk, and burst through the gates leading into the cemetery and lost his breath. Xion sent Roxas flying with a blast of magic from her blade. She rolled on the ground quickly putting out the fire and panted heavily. Despite having more battle experience and knowledge Roxas was losing… her lack of strength keeping her from performing well.

He noticed the purple haze in hers and Xion's eyes… the effects of the illusion. They had no idea they were fighting each other… and at the rate things were going Roxas was bound to lose.

"He's too strong…" he heard her whisper. "I have to finish it off before I lose anymore strength. It's all or nothing!"

He had to stop this! Axel realized and he clenched his fists around his chakrams. He couldn't lose Roxas, he just couldn't!

"STOP IT BOTH OF YOU!" He jumped between the two of them, his chakrams raised up blocking the finishing blows from both of the fighters. The illusion broke and both Xion and Roxas stared at each other dumbfounded.

"R-Roxas?" Xion blinked and backed away. "What are you doing here? What happened to the heartless I was fighting?"

"The.. .what?" Roxas panting, her face pale and she took a knee using the last dregs of her magic to cast cure on herself.

"It was an illusion." Axel explained. "This whole mission was a set up to make you two fight each other."

Roxas looked up at Axel her eyes wide. So that's why he had tried to stop her from going. He knew that Saix had set her up.

"Axel…"

"Come on…" he held out his hand to her. When she took it, their palms fitting in a way that made him feel complete inside. "Let's get you both out of here."

~Ask Briry~

Briry: Day 352…. WE'RE GETTING SO CLOSE! The climax is nearing and soon the end will fall upon our anti-heroes. Be sure to keep an eye out for the last few chapters and the epilogue conclusion to this tragic tale.

Next Chapter: The Final Breakup