If We Had Hearts

Chapter 15: The Final Breakup

"I know we've seen our share of sunsets… but today's puts them all to shame." Xion said with a soft smile. "If only things could stay like this forever."

After the showdown in Halloween town all three members were left pondering over why the organization saw fit to eliminate one of the keyblade wielders. It left an uncomfortable tension, one they all desperately tried to ignore by just being together, and enjoying the time they had.

"What if we just all just took off?" Roxas said suddenly unable to take the heavy atmosphere anymore. Both Xion and Axel paused eating their ice cream to stare owlishly at her. "If we ran away… then the three of us could always be together."

Axel sighed heavily and Xion lowered her gaze.

"...but we have nowhere to run."

Roxas sighed as well and folded her hands tightly over her ice cream stick.

"Yeah… I guess you're right."

"What's important…" Axel spoke up suddenly, his eyes looking far off into the sunset giving him a thoughtful, almost wise expression. "... isn't that we hang out with each other everyday."

"As long as we keep each other in our thoughts we'll never be apart right?" Xion smiled. "We've got it memorized Axel."

"Good." Axel grinned. Xion smiled back and looked down at her ice cream, she held it protectively as if to cherish it.

"I'll have these moments memorized for a long time… forever."

Roxas looked between the two of them, the soft and affectionate look shared between them bringing her an uncomfortable twist in her gut. She took another quick bite of her ice cream letting the brain freeze cover the pain in her stomach.

She felt Axel's fingers reach up and stroke her hair. Her eyes widened a moment then nearly teared. She closed them, just letting the sensation of his stroking fingers soothe away any pain.

"Me too...forever."

~Day 353~

"What an unlikely trio… me, Xion, and Xigbar?" Axel glanced at his group for the mission, and felt the warning bells go off in his head. "Not everyday we get to go on a mission with Number 2 himself."

"Yeah," Xion agreed and glanced back as Roxas walked into the room. Roxas stiffened when she saw the line up and she clenched a fist in her chest at the way she felt cut off from it all.

"Huh?" Roxas slowly approached them. "You three are paired together?"

"You've your own mission, Roxas." Saix told her with a hint of annoyance. He would not allow Axel interfere in his plans again. He'd gone through the trouble of having Xigbar keep an eye on those two so that he could arrange for Roxas' demise.

"I can't trade with Xigbar or something?" She said with a slight pout.

"Do you really need Axel to hold your hand through every mission." He told her with a hauty jerk of his nose.

Her eyes narrowed on Saix knowing full well what he had planned. She'd have to stay on her toes and do her best to complete this mission. For whatever reason the organization didn't want her around anymore… or at least Saix didn't. She clenched her fists.

"I never said that… and if this is the way you want it then fine." I'll show you my worth, Saix. Her eyes spoke volumes and her back went up as she stepped through the dark. Just you watch.

~With Xion, Axel, and Xigbar~

"I'm worried, Axel." Xion admitted as they made their way through Wonderland. "Saix has it out for Roxas. This mission she's going on by herself could be really dangerous."

"I know… and Xigbar is here to personally see we don't interfere." Axel clenched his fists at his side.

"I don't understand… we're both needed to collect hearts. Why do they want to get rid of one of us?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Xigbar spoke up having caught the last snippet of the conversation. "Roxas is getting weaker day by day. Sooner or later she'll completely lose the ability to even wield a keyblade."

Xion froze and her back went rigid as she whirled around on Xigbar.

"What?"

"Don't pretend as if you didn't know." Xigbar said with a sadistic laugh. "You know you're a puppet meant to copy her powers… and now little by little you're draining Roxas of everything she is or was. The reason Saix is getting Roxas out of the picture, is so you can absorb what little is left of her and become the official thirteenth member of our organization."

So it really was true, Xion thought with panic bubbling in her throat. It was because of her that Roxas was growing weaker.

"Why though? You already had Roxas as a thirteenth member! Why do you need me? What purpose do I serve?"

"Xion…" Axel held up his hand his eyes narrowing on Xigbar.

"You're a puppet, what do you think puppets do? They obey their master's orders without question… bobbing along on their strings." He wiggled his fingers in the air. "We need someone who can obey orders without qualm… and the best part is, because you're both connected to Sora you're putting that girl out of commission. Soon the chosen one will be no more."

"What!?" Xion gasped and her eyes widened thinking of Riku, the sad expression on his face when he spoke of his best friend, and of the girl he loved.

Because you're holding onto her memories, Sora can't wake up. Namine is doing her best to untangle them from yours… but the tighter you hold onto your bonds here… the tighter you hold onto the memories you've stolen from her.

"Sora… this isn't right. I can't let this happen." She turned her back to the two boys to run, but gasped as Xigbar attacked and blocked her path.

"Just where do you think you're going, poppet?"

Xion's eyes went hard, and with apologetic look to Axel she brought up her blade and prepared to fight.

"I'm going back where I belong!"

~With Roxas~

Roxas panted and fell to her knees. She'd finished off the last heartless with barely an ounce of energy left to spare. Sweat trickled down her temples and her eyes glazed over as she fought against the fatigue.

"Take that… Saix." She laughed bitterly and slowly got to her feet rocking a little on her heels before steadying. "Time to RTC."

She took her time getting back, resting and building up her strength as she walked back and stepped through the shadow door. She wondered if Xion and the others were back yet. It seemed kinda pointless to leave Twilight Town if they were just gonna come back for ice cream… but she had to check in and give a report… and beside she wanted to see the look on Saix's face when she came back victorious.

Feeling smug she walked through the portal. She raised a brow when it brought her to the staircase rather than the mission room. Ah well, Saix expected her to fail so he didn't pay attention to the drop off zone. With a shrug she walked up the steps and to the room… and stepped into a lecture zone.

"Explain yourself, Axel!" Saix demanded with a sneer.

"The old man needs to get his eye checked. She just got away." Axel explained with a casual shrug.

Roxas looked around for Xion and wondered what happened.

"I'll give him that, can't toss the blame around." Xigbar said just as casual.

Saix grunted and eyed Roxas. Damn it, why did nothing ever go as planned.

"Now we're left with the one we can't use."

"Excuse me?" Roxas' brow rose. "Did something happen?"

Saix didn't answer, instead he walked away miffed. Xigbar had to chuckle and he looked to Roxas who still had the questioning brow quirked.

"Xion flew the coop again." Xigbar said with a chuckle. "Flamsilocks here couldn't trouble himself to clip her wings." He jerked a thumb at Axel who crossed his arms.

"Didn't we just go over this?" He said with mild irritation.

"Huh?" Her eyes widened and she looked at Axel. "What does he mean, Axel?"

"Your friend here just stood there sucking his thumb while Xion walked right off." Xigbar shrugged. "I'm going back to my room… have fun with your little lover's spat."

He walked away practically whistling at the drama about to be unleashed.

"Axel… tell me what happened."

"There's nothing to tell. It's just like he said, I just sat there sucking my thumb." Axel sighed heavily and looked down at his hand, eyes conflicted.

"I'm asking you why you did that and you know it!" She came around him wanting to see his face. When he jerked his head to prevent himself from looking directly at her she seethed. "Axel!"

"Just drop it!" He shouted at her, his eyes saddening. "Please, Roxas. Just… drop it." He walked away from her and Roxas held her chest the pain and jealousy returning. Why did he look like that? Why had he let Xion go? What was going on between the two of them?

"Axel…" She grit her teeth and ran up to him yanking him back. "Stop running and answer me!"

Axel was about to walk away from her… was ready to flat out ignore her but he saw the pain and confliction on her face, and he sighed giving in.

"Xion… is a mirror that reflects you."

"What? You're not making any sense."

"Xion, is a puppet created to duplicate your powers." He told her crossing his arms over his chest.

"Your'e starting to sound like Saix, Xion's a person not a puppet!"

"She's a mirror made to reflect you… but when I looked into that mirror," Axel recalled Xion's hood falling, and the face that he'd seen wasn't the image he'd seen before… but of one he'd recognized completely. "It wasn't you I saw."

~Beast's Castle~

Xion stepped through the black and out onto the pathway. She immediately spotted Riku, and should have figured he'd find her.

"Riku…"

"Did you find the answer?" He asked calmly, his heart rolling in his chest as he stared into her face. He saw the mesh of himself, Kairi, and Sora blended there and knew she was running out of time before the merge was complete.

"Yes… I'm on the verge of losing everything I ever cared about." Xion confessed holding her chest. "I'm hurting Axel, I'm weakening Roxas… and Sora is-"

"I know… so what do you want to do?" He stepped up to her. "I can't play nice anymore Xion. I want to help you… but-"

"I know…" she returned with a sad smile. "Tell me what I should do, Riku."

"Go to the mansion in Twilight Town. There's a girl there named Namine. Talk to her, she'll set things straight."

"Mmm okay… thanks, Riku."

~Day 355: World that never Was~

An emergency meeting of the organization had brought everything to light. What Axel had tried to explain to her the day before now all came together in Roxas' mind.

Replica Program… Xion was a replica meant to copy her powers. Axel knew about this, had probably known about it for a long time and had hidden it from her. Why?

Xemnas said she and Xion were connected through someone named Sora… but who is Sora? If Xion was only a puppet, then what about her? Was she a puppet too?

"Who am I?" She rolled out of bed, and almost like a zombie she wandered the halls and towards the mission room. She immediately spotted Axel, and everything else around them disappeared.

"Axel…" She confronted him swallowing the large lump in her throat. Pain… god it hurt so much now that things were finally piecing together. Still there were too many questions left unanswered. If he was hiding things about Xion… what was he hiding about her? What did he know? She needed answers, she needed an explanation. "Did you find Xion yet?"

"No… you know it isn't going to be that easy." Axel said

"I suppose not…" she looked to the side, it was too painful to look at him.

"Roxas…" His chest ached seeing the broken look on her face and he stepped towards her to comfort but she backed away shaking her head.

"Have you known about Xion this whole time?" Take it slow, Roxas. She told herself trying to keep calm. One question at a time.

"No… not the whole time." Axel confessed wishing he didn't feel this wall that was separating them.

"Since when then?" She asked, glad she managed to keep her voice calm despite the storm waiting to erupt inside.

"I can't exactly remember when."

"Didn't get it memorized huh?" She said with bitter humor and lowered her head. She felt the threads of her control beginning to snap and she clenched her fists at her side. "Axel… who am I really?"

Taken aback by the question Axel turned to face her fully. He didn't quite have the answer so he remained silent, watching Roxas run through what she knew and work out the questions she needed to know.

"I'm special like Xion, I know that." She lifted her clenched fists and opened her palms. "...but the organization wanted me out of the picture. Am I right?"

"Yeah… they did." Axel said proud he was able to keep his own voice calm.

"I guess…" she felt the hitch in her breath as the relization hit her and increased the pain in her chest. "It's because Xion copied my and the keyblade's powers, and the organization didn't need me anymore." Xion was her replacement. She would be the keyblade's chosen now… she would be the thirteenth member. No one in the organization would care if she had to disappear in order for that to happen.

Her eyes lifted up to Axel's face. What about Axel? Would he go to care for her now that her powers were fading? The angry twist in her gut and chest leaving her broken inside.

"I guess you feel the same way."

"You're wrong about that," Axel said angry that she would even think it. "Xion's a friend, but you're the one whose special to me Roxas."

"Special?" She laughed bitterly. "Special? You still can't say it can you? You still think I made it up, or am confusing my memories or something? I love you, Axel! Or I did… now I just." she clenched a hand over her chest wanting desperately to hit something. "I don't want to feel anything anymore."

"Roxas…" he grabbed her hand when she turned to leave but she smacked it away whirling around on him.

"Let go of me! I'm tired of your half truths, I'm tired of your secrets! I know you know who I am but you refuse to tell me just like you didn't tell me about Xion! What is so wrong with wanting some answers?"

"Knowing the truth isn't going to make things better, trust me!" Axel tried to argue.

"I can't!" She screamed at him the tears streaming down now. "I can't trust you anymore! I can't trust anyone!" She turned on her heel. "If you won't give me answers, then I'll find them out on my own!"

Axel watched her go pain in his chest. He should go… he should just let her go. He had his own mission to complete… he needed to find Xion, he needed to bring her back and follow orders. If he didn't they'd eradicate him next…

"Roxas…" He cursed and banged his fist on the window staring out into the dark. "You have no idea what you're getting yourself into."

Roxas stormed into her room a fire lit under her. She ripped off her cloak and pulled the bag of clothes she'd bought in Twilight Town out. They were the only things she owned aside from the items the organization gave her for missions. She slipped them on and debated on tossing the cloak in the trash… but she'd need it to walk through the darkness. So instead she slipped it over her clothes and tossed her hair over her shoulder.

Lifting the bag she grabbed the accessories and paused when something else slipped out. She picked up the ice cream stick, the word "Winner" etched across it. Her eyes tear as Axel's words came to mind.

"Hey I almost forgot. You should be checking your stick to see if it says winner."

"What's that about?"

"What do you get if you win?"

"I tell yah… that's a good question… but it's gotta be something nifty if you're a winner right?"

"Axel…" She clutched the stick to her chest. Eyes hard she put the stick in an envelope and left it for Axel to find. She wanted nothing more to do with him. He would have Xion now, and the two of them would be fine without her. The organization wanted nothing more to do with her… she she'll leave, and take all her memories and feelings with her.

As she approached the castle exit she lifted her eyes and glared at Saix who blocked the exit.

"Just where do you think you're going?"

"I'm doing you all a favor and erasing myself from the picture." She told him boldly stepping forward. "Step aside, Saix."

"You're crossing a line, you foolish girl. Either return to your room… or be eradicated."

"Humph…" She extended her hand her keyblade appearing. "Are those really my only two choices? Because I see a third option for the taking."

She launched, their weapons meeting, sparks flying and the two of them duked it out. Roxas' eyes flared with fury and frustration and all the pent up aggression she'd build up ove rthe course of time was finally released in this bout.

Despite his experience, despite his berserker strength, Roxas' resolve was stronger. She cracked her blade over the back of his head knocking him down and making her huff out a laugh.

"God! I've been dying to do that for weeks!" She let her blade evaporate and she strut out of the castle feeling invigorated. A weight was lifting, and she could feel it the farther away she got from the castle. This was a new start for her… a new life.

"Your mind is made up?"

Axel's voice halted her and she glanced over at him. The weight returned the moment she looked in his eyes.

"Why did the keyblade choose me? I have to know."

"You can't turn on the organization! You get on their bad side and they'll destroy you!" Axel shouted at her with desperation. His eyes bore into hers, begging her not to leave.

Roxas saw his expression… and just wondered if it was all another lie.

"No one would miss me." Roxas said convinced that there wasn't a person in the organization who cared for her. She walked away from him tears dripping down her face as she felt the final break in their relationship and the wall coming up to separate them for good.

"That's not true!" He reached out for her, watching the darkness tunnell around her and her form vanish. His hand fell and he went to his knees knowing he'd lost her. "...I would."

~ASk Briry~

Briry: Been a long time coming. Was it worth the wait? I've only got two chapters left in this story so I hope you're all looking forward to it!

Next Chapter: Xion's Sacrifice