Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, or any associated characters or concepts. Consider it disclaimed. Quotes in this chapter taken from The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien.

Note on the story: Kili is 59 right now, which makes him roughly 15 or so for a human. No wonder he's such easy prey for Billa!

Summary: On the way to the Undying Lands, Billa is eaten by a time-traveling sea monster. The elves on board attack the monster in retaliation, and it escapes by swimming into the past: several decades into the past. Billa wakes up in a sweat, gasping and frightened, only to realize that she is back in her thirty-three-year old body. What on earth is she going to do?


Chapter 8

Kili gaped after Miss Baggins as she waved goodbye and flounced away. He felt both heartened by her (mostly false but not quite lying) praise of him, and betrayed by her unexpected abandonment. Then, his mother took him by the ear and he had other things to worry about.

"Kili!" Dis hissed at him as she marched him through the public area of the inn, twisting his ear in her fingers and making Kili cringe. "Where have you been? Do you have any idea how worried I was about you? Do you know what could have happened to you? This isn't Ered Luin! It's not safe here."

Her whole diatribe was delivered in a scathing whisper, but people were staring anyway and Kili's cheeks flushed with shame. Then the door slammed and they were in their rooms. She shoved him down into a chair by the fire and jabbed a finger at him. "Stay here. I'm going to fetch Oin. If you aren't here when I get back, I will find you and then I will turn you over my knee and spank you like the dwarfling you are! So stay!"

The door slammed again and she was gone. Kili groaned and pulled the handkerchief away from his nose to check the bleeding. The handkerchief was soaked through with blood, but the flow seemed to be slowing. It would probably heal faster if he put a cold cloth over his face. He walked to the wash basin, in the far corner of the room and rinsed the handkerchief in the cold water until it was stained pink instead of red. He wrung it in his hands and wiped his face clean of blood before rinsing it again. Then he folded it and put it over his nose, enjoying the feel of the cool water against his face.

Then the door slammed and Kili realized, with a swell of dread, that the washbasin was out of sight of the door, and his mother couldn't see him.

"KILI!" his mother screamed, and Kili tripped over himself as he rushed towards her.

"It's fine!" he said frantically, waving the handkerchief at her. "I was just washing up the blood and putting a cool cloth on my face. I promise!" He dove for the chair she had left him in and gripped the armrests tightly. He was already in enough trouble as it was. He did not want to add spanking to the list of probable punishments.

She glowered at him, and her voice came out in a seething hiss. "You are in so much trouble, young man. Oin, see to his face." She whirled away and slammed the door behind her, sparking yells of protest from a few lodgers whose patience had run out. She had probably gone to complain to Thorin and Fili. Kili sighed despondently. Oin just shook his head and started poking and prodding at Kili's face.