Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, or any associated characters or concepts. Quotes in this chapter taken directly from The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien.
Summary: On the way to the Undying Lands, Billa is eaten by a time-traveling sea monster. The elves on board attack the monster in retaliation, and it escapes by swimming into the past: several decades into the past. Billa wakes up in a sweat, gasping and frightened, only to realize that she is back in her thirty-three-year old body. What on earth is she going to do?
Chapter 20
Billa puttered around the kitchen, the sun just starting to rise as she prepared all kinds of breakfast food for her dwarves. She was determined to make their stay here a kind of paradise that they would long for after they left, and try to hurry back to.
Thorin, being the kind of dwarf over whom sleep held no dominion, was first in her kitchen.
He had been especially broody last night, hardly saying a word but lording over the conversation all the same. His eyes had frequently been on her, watching her carefully as if waiting for her to confess the food was poisoned or something. It had made her heart beat a little faster, but she was fairly used to his glares and moods. She made sure to serve him first, as was proper, and such deferential treatment seemed to placate him, for after finishing his third glass of wine, he rose (on perfectly steady feet! She was impressed) and gave her a quick nod before retiring. He was the only dwarf who seemed able to walk in a straight line. Fili and Kili were especially tipsy, and she and Dis both had to wrangle them away from her breakables and into their beds.
Dis's mien had been significantly warmer since being reassured of Billa's intentions, and Billa intended to keep it that way. Billa walked Dis to her room and they laughed a little over the boys, and Billa made sure to ask for Dis's favorite foods so she could be sure to have them on hand. Dis had blushed a little, just like Kili did when she showed him particular attention.
"My brother and I are particularly fond of blackberries, Miss Baggins. They grew wild around our childhood home, and are a fond memory for us," Dis said, the wine softening her control enough that she actually sounded wistful. Billa's heart swelled painfully. She remembered the wild blackberry bushes that had grown among the crags of the mountain. Bombur had made blackberry pie one night, and Thorin had uncharacteristically gripped his shoulder in thanks as he took the largest piece.
"I'll be sure to make something with blackberries, then," Billa said kindly, and bowed slightly to Dis when they arrived at Dis's room. "Goodnight, Lady Dis," she said.
Dis nodded her head deeply. "Goodnight, Miss Baggins."
Now, Thorin sat at the head of her table and nodded regally when she placed a plate of food in front on him. On it were sausages, eggs, bacon, toast, an assortment of roasted vegetables, and a blackberry tart. She placed a few more tarts on a platter on the table, saving the rest for Dis later in the day.
"Mister Thorin," she said as she sat beside him, making herself comfortable and filling her own plate, "My Uncle Isumbras will be coming today around 2:30 to see the pans you repaired, and he'll be the one to convince if you want to use one of the forges here in the Shire. He does hold a position of some importance, you know," she told him, a little sternly.
"The Shire doesn't have a king, we have a Thain. But the Thain is the closest the Shire is ever going to get to a King, and the current Thain is my Uncle Isumbras. He is very much a no-nonsense fellow and doesn't take kindly to insults or mindless small talk, much like you." Thorin was staring at her as if she'd grown a third eyeball or something. "I know you're not a very talkative or sociable person, but please. Please, Mister Thorin," she said, putting as much pleading into her voice as she could muster, "Please be as friendly as you can, because if you offend him for any reason, he can make it very difficult for us to do business," she said earnestly.
Thorin just stared at her for a few moments.
"Mister Thorin?" she prompted.
"Your Uncle..." he said slowly, "... is the equivalent to King of the Shire."
Billa nodded quickly, "Yes, which is why this meeting is so important, because if he-"
Thorin interrupted. "Your Uncle is the King-"
"Thain," Billa corrected.
"- the King," Thorin continued, "which makes you a part of the royal family of the Shire. Is that correct?"
Billa wobbled her head in a yes-and-no motion. "Sort of. Not really a royal family. Just -"
Thorin interrupted again. "You are in the line of succession, aren't you?" he asked sternly.
Billa wobbled her head again. "Technically," she admitted, "I am. But!" she said loudly, shaking a finger at him when he made to interrupt again, "But! The odds of me ever becoming Thain are incredibly small. I have a dozen cousins who come before me, all of them likely to have at least half a dozen children. No," she said, shaking her head. "I'll certainly never become Thain, and neither will any children I have, should I ever marry."
Unfortunately, it seemed that Thorin wasn't listening. "You're a princess," he said, wonder in his voice as he stared at her with new light glowing in his eyes. Billa started to protest, but Dwalin and Dis entered at this exact moment.
"Dis! Dwalin!" Thorin called, a dash of excitement in his voice. "Miss Baggins is a princess! Her uncle is the King-"
"Thain!" Billa corrected curtly.
"-of the Shire, and he's coming for tea today." Thorin finished. Dis stared, and Dwalin snorted shortly.
"Of course she is," Dwalin said, amused.
Billa glared. "Not a princess!" she insisted. "The Shire doesn't have a king."
Dis steamrolled over her, exclaiming about how exciting this was, and why hadn't she told them? Were they to call her Princess Billa? Exasperated, Billa talked more frankly than she should have.
"You should no more call me Princess Billa than you would call Mister Dwalin a Prince! Yes, I'm related, but I'm far enough away as to be able to lead a normal life!" she said loudly. The dwarves stared, startled.
"How did you..." Dis said cautiously, and Billa realized that she had revealed more than she intended to. Her brain scrambled for an explanation.
"Well, Misters Fili and Kili had to give me lessons on history after they lost an eating contest. They mentioned that Mister Dwalin is related to you, and after some reading, I knew why Mister Thorin's name sounded so familiar. It is an honor to have the King-In-Exile and his family as guests in my home," she said, rising from her seat to bow low to Thorin, and then again, not quite so low, to Lady Dis.
Lady Dis stared for a moment longer, and then gave a short bow in return, as did Dwalin. Thorin gave his most regal nod.
"We'll not call you Princess, then," Dis agreed. "But we shall call you Lady Baggins."
"Just Billa, please," Billa said, a little desperate.
"Lady Billa, then," Dis said decisively. "I shall inform the others," she said, turning to leave.
"Wait!" Billa said, scrambling from her seat and rushing to the kitchen. "Before you go, try one of these?" she said hopefully, holding out the platter with blackberry tarts. Dis took one cautiously, taking a little nibble from the corner. Her brows furrowed, and she took a larger bite. Billa stood, waiting in hopeful agony. Dis's expression bloomed into a grin, like nothing Billa had ever seen on her face.
"Lady Billa," Dis said, beaming happily, "I think we are going to be wonderful friends." She took another tart from the plate and, a tart in each hand, turned to go fetch her boys and inform them of the situation.
Billa grinned, and gestured to the tart on Thorin's plate. "Try it," she said.
Thorin did so, eyeing her with a hint of suspicion. Then the flavor blossomed on his tongue, and his eyes widened. He stared at her, the most flabbergasted expression she had ever seen appearing on his face. Then he swallowed, and there was a gentle smile curving his lips.
"The lads had better be on their best behavior to you, Lady Billa," he said, the hint of a twinkle in his eye. "They are amongst royalty, after all," he said.
Was he teasing her? Billa thought disbelievingly. She smiled indulgently at him, disarmed by his smile. "I suppose they are," she said, conceding the fight. If I made him blackberry tarts every day, Billa wondered, would he smile like that all the time?
She resolved to test that theory. Each day that Thorin stayed with her, she made sure there were blackberry pastries to be had. And each time he bit into one, he smiled that gentle smile, and looked at her.
