Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, or any associated characters or concepts. Quotes in this chapter taken directly from The Hobbit by JRR Tolkien.

According to my plans, Thorin's not gonna kiss her until after the end of Winter. That is very clearly written in my plans! And then, well, this chapter happened. Enjoy!

the Undying Lands, Billa Baggins is eaten by a time-traveling sea monster. She wakes up in her 33-year-old body and realizes she has a chance to change everything. Unfortunately, Thorin has a tendency to run around shirtless and Dis thinks she has improper designs on Fili and Kili, but if she can convince the Shire that Dwalin is a dance teacher, things might be okay.


Chapter 41

In the first three days after the dwarves arrived, things were busy.

Dwalin oversaw the first hobbit 'dance' classes and tweaked the lessons as necessary, using Iglishmek to guide the dwarf teachers as they got used to their very innocent, very cheerful new students. Dwalin made sure to talk up the teachers to his fan clubs and share as many hobbit-appropriate heroic stories as he could create.

Thorin spent most of the time either down at the smials or up in Bag End's study, making arrangements and laying out plans. Billa often accompanied him, with Bifur or Nori trailing after her just as Balin trailed after Thorin.

Each night, Billa would take an hour or so to visit the pubs and check up on things. One night, she convinced Thorin to accompany her. As they entered the pub on the main road (one of the best pubs if you wanted news of the outside world) Billa secured a table to listen while Thorin went to buy the drinks.

As she was sitting, a Breeman staggered over to sit at her table, obviously drunk. Billa wrinkled her nose in distaste, even as she noted that he was one of the pony ostlers that rode often between Bree and the Shire, exchanging ponies and horses at the inns. They came into some of the pubs occasionally, but most of them knew to keep to themselves and not cause any trouble. This one didn't, apparently.

He leered at her, and she sneered at him, clearly disinterested and hoping he would go away. His look of appreciation turned into a scowl at her rejection, and he reached over a grimy, unwelcome hand to tweak her ears. She smacked his hand away. Over his shoulder, Billa could see Thorin at the bar, looking furious and ready to storm to the rescue and possibly disembowel the drunken man.

Males! she thought grumpily. The Breeman's scowl turned uglier and he heaved himself upright and came over to her side of the table, towering over her and grabbing her by the shoulder as his other hand came up to grope at her ears. She snarled and jerked her staff up between his legs. He yelped and crumpled to his knees, whereupon she kicked his face with her large, furry feet and he tumbled away, moaning on the floor. Everyone in the pub turned at the noise to stare, both quiet hobbit-folk and a corner booth with more Breemen. Thorin froze where he stood, halfway between her table and the bar, drinks in one hand and another hand on his sword pommel.

"Anyone else," she said through gritted teeth as she stared down the room, "think it's appropriate to touch a hobbit's ears against her wishes?" she spat. She caught a glimpse of tri-corn hair braids through a window and heard a familiar, quiet snicker. Nori. Then noise swelled again, and Billa was surrounded by hobbits wishing to check if she was okay. One of the ostlers came over while the others dragged the prone man's body away, and bashfully offered apologies. Billa released him after he promised to keep a watch whenever he was drinking in the future, and come to a lady's defense should she ever need it.

After the fervor calmed down and Thorin came to stand by her, offering her a drink.

"Errr...Billa," he said uncertainly, looking at his boots. "Did I... Were my advances as unwelcome or ... as inappropriate as that Man's?" he asked quietly, shyly.

Billa blushed at the memory of his lips and breath in the drawing room.

"I-. Er," she started, looking down at her toes and wiggling them in flustration. "That is to say, they were highly improper, but..." she darted a glance at him. He was staring at her with intense blue eyes, hanging on her every word. Was he closer than he had been? Was it warm in here?

She glanced away again and cleared her throat. "But... I-." Why was this so hard to admit? "They were not, um," her toes were truly, spectacularly well-groomed. And the wood flooring was particularly detailed, despite its age. "That is...Um..." She was sure her face was blushing. She glanced at him again and he was starting to look worried.

She swallowed heavily. Thorin didn't deserve to be kept in suspense, so if words failed her, actions would have to do. She grabbed the drink from his hand and plopped it onto the table with hers. Then, she grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the the pub and into the shadows. He stumbled after her, holding her hand tightly and looking by turns concerned and hopeful. She pulled him out of sight, into some tall bushes. She glanced up at him, his face lit by moonlight. He looked fond but his brow was furrowed in confusion as well.

"Billa?" he asked gently. She swallowed again, still clutching his hand with one of hers. Then she reached up and tangled her fingers in his short beard, and tugged his face down to her level. He gasped, his face close to hers, his eyes wide and his thin, soft-looking lips open with his white teeth peeking out. Their breath mingled, misty in the cold night air. She bit her lip as her eyes flickered between his eyes and his mouth.

She could hear drums pounding in the distance- or was that her heart? The large, strong hand she was holding in hers moved to hold her wrist, caressing her skin gently as his other arm wrapped around her, his forearm across her back but his fingers dipping under her hair to stroke the nape of her neck. She felt tingles spreading all across her body from where he was touching her, and felt her knees start to tremble. Her hand moved to lay flat against his cheek, petting it gently, awed at the smoothness of his cheek and the softness of his beard.

Then she lifted up on the tips of her toes, and pressed her lips to his. It was soft, sweet, and it filled Billa with a warm kind of euphoria. Her lips caressed his, and he nuzzled his nose against her cheek, seemingly content to let her have her way with him.

She pulled back until she was a breath away, an irrepressible smile upon her face. "Thorin," she whispered before leaning back in to kiss him again.

"Billa," he murmured, tightening his arms around her. She couldn't stop smiling, and it quickly became harder to kiss him because her lips kept pulling up into a smile. He seemed to share her problem, grinning at her and nuzzling his face against hers and sighing her name. "Billa... Billa... My Billa," he rumbled quietly as he pressed their cheeks together.

Billa gathered her courage and moved her hand from his cheek and up to tug gently at his braids, and stroke through his hair and then- then! she carefully, daringly ran the tip of her finger just along the shell of his rounded ears. Aren't I bold? she thought giddily. He hummed agreeably in her ear.

"Such liberties you take, my little princess," he whispered teasingly, his hands moving to grip her waist. Billa felt impossibly small next to his muscular, sturdy body, but she also felt incredibly safe. "Shall I take the same?" he growled playfully.

Billa grinned and turned her head ever slightly to the side, giving him access to one of her slim, pointed ears. "No lips, my king," she informed him, as he pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Just hands" she said. He smiled, and one hand wrapped around her to bring her flush against his chest while the other delved into her hair, sometimes stroking the long, curly strands, sometimes tracing his fingers down the slender lines of her neck, and sometimes fondling the tips and then the lobes of her ear.

Billa clung to him, pressing her face into his neck and making tiny gasps against his skin as he obeyed her direction. One of her hands crept up and copied his movements through his hair, down his neck, and around his ears while the other clung to his arm, leaning on his rock-hard strength admiringly and wonderingly.

After several minutes of this exquisite torture, Billa pulled herself firmly away, and Thorin let her go, moving his arms down to her waist while both of her hands came up to grip at his arms. They were both breathing unsteadily, and Billa groaned before leaning forward and pressing her forehead to his chest.

"We should get back," she murmured quietly, her heart still pounding. She could feel his own steady pulse thrumming, and it pleased her in some primal, affectionate way.

He hmmed, rumbling deeply as he wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly. Her hands slipped up to wrap around his neck, taking solace in his embrace.

"Aye," he whispered finally, after several moments of this new wonderful closeness. "Let's get back."

Slowly, reluctantly, they moved apart, Billa smiling giddily while Thorin's lips quirked undeniably upwards.

"After you, Princess," he teased quietly, holding back the branches of the bush so they could escape.

"My thanks, your Majesty," she rejoined fondly. He huffed quietly, amused.

He offered her his arm, and she took it happily, and they ambled amiably up to Bag End. He walked her to her door, whereupon he swooped down and kissed her nose. She laughed and seized his braids before he could escape, and tugged his face down so she could do the same.

With a shyly murmured goodnight, they walked into their separate rooms.

Neither of them noticed Nori at the end of the hall, doing a victory dance in the shadows on socked feet.


As she closed the door behind her, Billa thought she might burst with happiness. Her heart was fluttering and her mind was whirling and she wished she could burst into song without disturbing her sleeping guests.

As it was, she twirled in a happy little circle, laughing to herself and giggling. She threw herself onto the bed, looking up at the ceiling with a radiant smile and then she sighed happily.

"I have never been so happy in all my life!" she squealed quietly. "I kissed him! And he kissed me! and it was Thorin! Oh, Thorin," she sighed again, clutching a pillow to her heart. All of the feelings that had been swirling around her soul, centered on him for the past eighty decades finally coalesced out of confusion and into clarity.

"My stars, Thorin Oakenshield," she murmured dazedly. "I think I might love you."